It's the afternoon now and I am waiting for Meryl to come home. I have already gathered my things. My mind was made up. I was going back to Knives. It was my brotherly duty to take care of my twin.
"Hi, Vash," Meryl greeted cheerfully. "I'm sorry I'm a bit late. I had more paperwork than I thought."
She hasn't noticed my bag at my feet. She steps inside the apartment and shut the door. She stares at me and stops. It was now that she noticed that I was dressed for a journey. I wore my old body armor, the only thing different was my coat. Once, red now a milk chocolate. I had tossed the red one in the desert after I defeated my brother. I discarded it like I discarded my past. I will always remember but I could not allow it to guide me any longer. And yet, here I stand in front of the love of my long life about to go to take care of the biggest reminder of that long past.
"You're leaving," her voice already emotional.
"Yes," I answered tightly.
"Why?" she asked.
I see the tears build in her eyes, threatening to fall and I nearly look away. I really hate to see her cry, my tough Short Insurance Girl.
"Knives, I have to go to him," I tell her. "He is my responsibility. I shouldn't have left him."
Meryl's crying now. She is now trying to hide it by ducking her head.
"You feel guilty for leaving him behind," she said and I realized she truly understands me.
"Yes," I confirmed as steadily as I could.
We pause to stare at each other. Just taking in our last images of each other to get us through our separation.
"I love you, Meryl," I confess hoping to lesson the blow and realizing it could only make things worse.
"I know," she said. "I love you too and I understand. You have to be there for you brother."
She pauses and gives a shaky sigh.
"Will I ever see you again?" she asked me.
"I don't know," I answered.
"Should I wait for you?"
It's my turn to sigh. I want to be selfish and say yes, but I can't. I may never come back. She deserves happiness, a husband, children. Everything I'm not sure I'm going to be there to be her husband and give her children.
"No," I finally said.
She closed her eyes and takes a deep eyes.
"Go," she insists. "Leave."
She moves from the door, clearing the way for my exit.
I slowly made walk to the door. When I reached it, I turned to her and stroked her cheek. She moved away from my touch.
"Go," she said again.
I drop my hand to the doorknob. Turning it and opening the door. I do what my beloved Meryl ordered me to do, I go and leave her alone.