A/N: I apologize for taking so long to update, I know many of you have been very anxious about this story and I believe that I won't be discontinuing it any time soon, so don't worry about that. I may have lost interest, not hope. I'm sorry if this chapter turns out like crap, it's been a long while and I may have lost my touch. I truly hope I'm not letting you all down :/ The beginning is a bit slow, I think, sorry about that.
Lydia stared at the dress Adam and Barbara gave her for her sixteenth birthday to wear on Halloween. Today. They knew that Lydia shut herself away on Halloween week but they never gave up hope that she would come back to her senses and once more be the Lydia they loved so much.
Given, the dress was beautiful, as were all of the other dresses she was given in the past two years. This one, unlike the rest, was short. Barely reaching her knees. The skirt, like the rest, was puffy, layered in black and white randomly, no actual pattern. The top, like many others was a corset. Unlike the others, it tied together in the back, crisscrossed with fine lace. Black and white crossing each other. This one, not similar to the rest, has one splash of color. Red. Just one simple figure, yet it meant so much more to Lydia. What red could be seen was on outline of a heart. The inside of the heart, black. Dripping into the black, more red. An empty hole, where a beating heart once resided comfortably, no longer there, not able to take the suffering. That's what Lydia saw to it.
She traced the red. Her finger turning the curve, going down, back up and along the other curve. She glanced down, at the foot of her bed where black heeled boots sat, already covered in dust. The scarlet laces tied up perfectly into a messy bow at the top. She glanced up again, not at the dress laying on her bed neatly, but where her mirror was. She stared at her many reflections, as the glass remained shattered, just the way he left it. She wasn't the way he left her though.
Her hair, longer. Her bangs covering her cold, dark eyes. She bothered not, to look pleasing to the eye. Dark circles went around her eyes, black and purple, lack of sleep. Her skin, pale as always, but with a sickly glow to it. Her body, more developed to a point where it can be considered desirable by many, but terribly malnourished, lack of appetite, effect of depression. Her smile, beautiful and radiant as ever, broken and hardly present. Her lips, full and glossy, always turned into a pestering frown, although barely visible to others, was always there. Her eyes, always alert and expressive, now vacant and dull.
At times, she forced a smile to please her parents and ghostparents. At times, she uttered words to let them know there was still someone there. At times, she sat at the table and poked at her dinner. At times, she sat outside, only when it rained and stayed out for hours. No one ever questioned her actions, they decided she was happy that way.
Her parents left the house on trips for days at a time and Lydia would never notice. People would come visit, she would sit through it. They spoke to her, knowing she wasn't listening, hoping she would surprise them but she never did.
Adam and Barbara, after months of consideration, tried bringing him up. The sentence didn't make it out completely before Lydia sent them an icy glare, the most emotion she had showed in the course of the months that had passed.
She attended school less and less. Her parents didn't bother to talk to her about it anymore, they knew they would get nothing from her. Somehow, she managed to pass grades with A's and B's, so they didn't bother her about it. She stopped talking to her friends too. They still visited her though. Lydia found no point in speaking to anyone, they would never understand her. Not even she understood, she didn't expect anyone else to.
Adam and Barbara, getting desperate, ran to Juno for help. The ghost, pitying the girl, tried speaking to her. She even ushered her to call him. Lydia only said; "I can't. He told me not to." and then refused to see Juno any time after that.
Barbara always wondered, day and night, why she followed that order. She knew it was destroying her, though she never audibly admit it, yet she didn't call him nor did she try and move on. It made no sense to the ghost but she didn't dare question the troubled girl. If it were up to her, she would have called him herself, just to help her beloved Lydia but it was not in her hands to do so, nor did she have the power.
Lydia finally pried her eyes off the shattered mirror after what seemed like forever. She let her eyes fall to the shards of glass scattered over the floor. The tears that brimmed her eyes now fell. Every night, she would stare at that mirror, hoping that she would see any signs of him.
Lydia was getting tired of waiting. She began to wonder why. Why did she wait? What was she waiting for exactly? He would come back and then? Nothing would go back as it were before, she knew. She also wondered, every second of the day, why he left in the first place? What was the purpose of that? She had no clue, not one. Why did she want him back anyway? Friends come and go all the time. It hurts for some time and then it's gone. You forget. Why couldn't it be the same with him?
Lydia knew why. Because he was different. He made her feel ways no one else could. Not any living being, not any ghost, not anyone. He was special to her and he left far too soon. She never knew what she had, until it was gone. She didn't know it would hurt so much, for so long. She wasn't close to him, not friends exactly, but no one could deny that there was something special between them and she wouldn't deny it. There was no point in denying it, she felt so empty without him around.
She wanted to call him back. Every day she opened her mouth, the word in her throat, but the memory of him leaving flashed through her head each time. She feared that if she called, he'd leave and she knew it would hurt too much. On the other hand, she could call and there was a chance he wouldn't answer her and that would also hurt. She wondered what she did wrong. If he thought about her everyday like she thought about him. If he cared at all about how she was doing.
Has two years been enough? Was she getting tired of this silly routine? Tired of waiting for him to come back and everything to go back to normal? Yes. She was sick of it. So sick of it, it was driving her mad.
Lydia wasn't going to put up with this anymore. She wasn't going to beat herself up for something she didn't do. She wasn't going to sit around, dreaming he'd appear through a heavy mist with that feral grin on his face and call her babes. She wasn't.
Lydia began to tear her clothes off frantically. She snatched the dress off the bed and stepped into it, wiggling as she pulled it up. She struggled while fixing the laces in the back. She sat down on her bed to pull on the boots. She winced as she jammed her feet in, not bothering to loosen the laces in her haste. Her breathing was uneven, her hands shaking as she rimmed her eyes with liner and smothered her lashes with mascara. She painted her lips scarlet red, shimmering in the light. She hissed as more tears fell freely, making the makeup run. She hit her fists against the vanity and shook as she held her sobs in, she wasn't going to break down.
She took a sharp breath, then holding it as she stormed out of her room. She stomped her way down the stairs, straight to the kitchen. She ignored Delia entirely as she pulled out a big butchers knife and then slammed the drawer shut.
"You're going out tonight, Lyddie?" Delia asked excitedly, despite Lydia's mood.
Lydia walked out of the kitchen, swung the door open and walked out, slamming the door after her. Delia stood there, confused at what had just happened. Something told her to look at the stairs and she saw Adam and Barbara standing there, looking worried sick.
"Where do you think she's headed, Adam?" Barbara whispered to her husband.
Adam shook his head, "I don't know, Barbara..." He mumbled sadly.
The streets were crawling with children under blankets with holes for eyes. Others had pumpkin heads and tattered clothes. Others were princesses, baseball players and fairies. Some adults accompanied their children dressed as a mummy, Frankenstein's Monster, witches and goblins. Lydia passed them by as if they weren't there. She had no idea where she was going but that didn't stop her.
It took her a while to slow down and look around. She started to hear the laughter and joy and Halloween songs all around her. Had she almost forgotten the joy that this brought to her? Lydia loosened her grip on the knife. She frowned as she looked down at it. Why had she grabbed it in the first place? She dropped it into a trash can in disgust.
"Happy Halloween, lady!" A little boy under a white blanket said as he ran by her. Lydia didn't have time to even smile at him much less reply. She looked around again. The decorations were wonderful. Jack-o-lanterns, lights, spooky signs, skeletons, hanging bats, scarecrows, small coffins, walkway lights in the form of little, friendly looking ghosts and teepee flying all around, courtesy of the teens.
"AHHHH!" A shriek went off right into Lydia's ear. She flinched, covering her face with her arms and her eyes shut tight. "Found you!" Came a bubbly, giggly voice.
Lydia moved her arms, recognizing the voice immediately. "What are you doing here, Morgan?" She asked dumbly. She looked her over in that skimpy red riding hood costume.
"Looking for you of course! I went up to your house but your mo- I mean, Delia. Told me you were out! So I came down as quick as I could to find you and personally invite you to my Halloween Party!" She said, ending the sentence in screaming.
"Thanks, but no thanks, Morgan. I just want some fresh air." She said, her voice heavy as lead.
"Lyddie, you've already missed two of my Halloween Parties." She said more serious now. She sounded sad and disappointed.
Lydia sighed heavily and rolled her eyes. Morgan squealed in excitement and dragged her in the direction toward her house. It would be a long walk so Morgan decided to talk to her, hoping she'd talk back.
"We miss you a lot, Lyddie." She whispered, trying to look into her friend's face which was shadowed over by her hair. Lydia didn't respond in the least. Morgan frowned and tried again. "What brought you out this fine night?" She poked at her ribs with her elbow with a playful grin on her face.
"If I stayed in there any longer, I'd go insane." She mumbled.
"You mean more insane?" Morgan teased. Lydia's face grew darker if possible. Morgan swallowed hard. "Your costume is really cool. What are you supposed to be?" She asked, her voice still joyful.
"Lydia." She mumbled in response.
"This isn't Lydia." Morgan said seriously. Lydia noticed the change in her tone and tilted her head to look at her questioningly. "Lydia wasn't always this miserable." She said sadly. "You were fun to be around. Your stories and adventures were all so fascinating. Now you're this empty shell and you won't even tell us what's wrong." She said, obviously irritated. "We want to help you, Lyddie, but you have to let us." She whispered.
Lydia cracked a small, meaningless smile for the sake of her friend. She appreciated everything they did for her, but there was nothing they could do to help her. But she could try and help herself... She lifted her head slightly, forcing the smile a bit farther. "I just miss him." She mumbled.
"Who?" Morgan jumped right into it. She wanted to know what bothered her friend so badly. "Who do you miss, Lydia, you can tell me." She said, putting a comforting hand on her friends shoulder.
Lydia scoffed softly, "You wouldn't understand. Don't worry about it." She said, giving her a small reassuring smile.
"This all can't be about some guy you miss, Lydia. All of this depression, misery, can't be about some guy." She said disbelievingly.
"That's just it. He's not just some guy, Morgan." She said with a small, honest smile. Morgan stared at her friend in awe. She acted to strange.
"Why don't you just- Ah!" She squeaked as she tripped over a bump on the sidewalk. She steadied herself and then looked around. "Oh, we're here!" She said excitedly.
There was loud music playing from the inside. Though Morgan preferred pop music, she played all of her favorite rock songs at her Halloween parties. Born Like This by Three Days Grace was playing. Colorful lights flashed out through the windows in wild patterns as the strobe light just flashed constantly, making Lydia a bit dizzy. She wanted to turn around and leave.
"Come on!" Morgan said, dragging her up the steps and flying through the porch and into the house. The toxic smell of alcohol and weed infiltrated Lydia's nose, making it sting and her stomach twist.
"Where are your parents?" Lydia shouted over the loud music. Morgan mouthed "Away" before pulling her into the kitchen. There were a few couples talking while sharing a drink, minding their own business. "Who are these people?" Lydia asked while looking around at the people around them. She had never seen these faces at the school.
Morgan giggled, "Everyone at school plus two!" She gushed.
Lydia shook her head and frowned, "Morgan, are you drunk already?" She asked. How didn't she notice before?
"Since before the party started! Everyone knows that they have to pre-drink!" She giggled maniacally.
"This is going to get messy." Lydia mumbled before walking off. She went through the kitchen doors and wanted to reel back in. There were drunk teenagers everywhere, trashing their bodies around to Nookie by Limp Bizkit.
Lydia absentmindedly started rocking her head back and forth as she went up the stairs where the music got louder. She sighed as she stood before teenagers cramping the small hall space, all making out. What was this? She rolled her eyes, pushing past them. She felt some pinches and pokes but she ignored them, walking into Morgan's room. She stood frozen at the door. The couple on the bed glared up at her. Lydia returned the glare but slammed the door shut.
She went further down the hall, which seemed so much longer now, and tried getting into the bathroom. The door was locked and the light shone through the bottom. Ocupado. She turned just as a guy leaned on the wall next to her. He wasn't getting anything from her.
She sighed, seeing as the only other place she could hide in was the closet. She opened the door and looked around in it. Mostly cleaning supplies, tools and a few towels and blankets. Homey. She stepped in, looking out to see if anyone was looking at her. Of course no one was and she closed the door, sitting down in the small space. She crossed her legs, patting her knees to the beat of Haunted by Evanescence. Lydia scoffed at the irony of it.
Long lost words whisper slowly to me
Still can't find what keeps me here
When all this time I've been so hollow inside
I know you're still there
Watching me, wanting me
I can feel you pull me down
Fearing you, loving you
I won't let you pull me down
Hunting you, I can smell you - alive
Your heart pounding in my head
Watching me, wanting me
I can feel you pull me down
Saving me, raping me, watching me
Watching me, wanting me
I can feel you pull me down
Fearing you... loving you
I won't let you pull me down!
Lydia sang softly until the song ended. "So very ironic." She mumbled to herself. Chop Suey by System of a Down started to play.
"Beetlejuice..." She said into the darkness.
Why have you forsaken me?
In your eyes forsaken me,
In your thoughts forsaken me,
In your heart forsaken me, oh.
The song screamed over her voice, but she knew he would hear. Ghosts by Michael Jackson started playing and cheers went off in the house. So very fitting, she thought. "Beetlejuice." She said firmly. What am I doing, she wondered over and over.
Every second thought was blown away by that eerie chill that brushed her over shoulders. What would happen next, she didn't care.
There's a tappin' in the floor,
There's a creak behind the door,
There's a rocking in the chair,
But nobody's sitting there.
There's a ghostly smell around,
But nobody to be found,
And a coughin' and a yawnin',
Where a restless soul is going.
"Beetlejuice." She finished. She waited patiently for something to happen. Anything. But nothing came. Seconds turned to minutes which felt like hours and nothing happened. There was that feeling she feared. Rejection, loneliness...
Tears fell from her eyes in a mix of emotions. Fury, sadness, despair. The hairs on the back of her neck stood on end as a breeze passed by. Breezes couldn't come in to that closet. She knew he was there. She snarled angrily, "Two years, B. Two years." She hissed. She was unsure if she was talking to herself or not but she didn't care up to this point. "You left me, without a word or explanation. Not even a goodbye. How did you think that would make me feel? Do you even care?" She asked, her anger rising in her voice.
"I know. I know you've been watching me, B. I know you have seen what you did to me and yet, you never came back, never gave me a sign that you were still there with me!" She spat. "I know you're there, B, show yourself!" She nearly screamed. That chill rolled over her hands softly. Lydia snatched her hands away and growled, "Now." She demanded.
A screwdriver rolled out from a tool box that was laying on the ground. It stopped in front of her and stood on the tip. It started carving into the wood.
"I know you can, B. Juno told me the deal." She hissed.
Let me... rephrase... that... I don't... want to. He wrote down slowly.
"Why not? Why did you leave? I need explanations, B. I need them now or I swear I'll go crazy!" She said frantically.
Calm down...I haven't been watching you. I don't... He scratched that out. Do you have... any idea of what I almost got us... into?
"Beetlejui-" The screwdriver stabbed itself into the wood, scaring the wits out of Lydia. "B, I don't care. That's all in the past. Why did you have to leave? You know... you know I miss you." She whispered in the end.
I'm not... going to apologize, Lyds...
"I don't want you to! I don't care about that I just want things to go back as they were! My life hasn't been normal since you left, B. I want my life back..." She pleaded.
I don't need to be... a part of that. Before me... everything was fine...
"Before you, life was meaningless. Before you, and Barbara and Adam." She said honestly, "You said it yourself. No one understands ghosts better than I do. I prefer them over the living, I find them to be interesting and really good friends and B, I don't care what might happen, I want to see you." She said firmly.
I don't look too good, Lyds...
"I don't care." She said.
I can't here... someone might see me...
"It's a Halloween party and they're drunk, possibly high. Don't look for excuses." She warned.
"I warned you..." Lydia shuddered at the sound of his voice. Was it even him? It didn't sound hyper and loud like she remembered it. The room's temperature plummeted to below freezing. She hugged herself tightly. How could it get so cold, so fast? Her breathing hitched. She got up to turn on the light. She hissed when the light hit her eyes but quickly hugged herself again. The light started the shake and flicker on and off. Lydia could see her breath as she breathed through her mouth.
She saw a mist seeping in through the space beneath the door. It floated up, passing her head. She watched as it started forming a body. She waited patiently as the mist slowly kept forming, so slowly. Usually he would appear quickly.
"I can't." He said gruffly. He sounded out of breath.
"B, are you okay?" She asked worriedly.
"I'm too weak..." He mumbled.
Lydia bought her shaky hand up and reached out to touch him. She felt cold wood beneath her fingertips. Her hand went right through him. "Why? What's wrong with you? A-are you sick?" She asked.
"I'm dead. Of course I'm not sick." He said, his voice barely above a gruff whisper. "I haven't exactly been too active since... then." He mumbled awkwardly.
"What c-can fix it?" She asked, running her hand through him again curiously. The mist was cold as was the room.
"Food would help..." He said.
Lydia frowned, "You ha-haven't eaten in t-two years?" She asked, hugging herself tightly. It was getting too cold for her in there, so close to him.
"Well-" She gasped, the cold overbearing. "I c-c-can't... s-so co-ld." She managed to say before running out of the closet. The sudden change of temperature made her sweat. She started getting looks from the people in the party. She ignored them, dashing through them and down the hall, flying down the stairs and out the front door.
She walked down the sidewalk until she took the curve. She stopped, looking around. There were still people out trick or treating. What did it matter? "B..." She called out. She gasped as the area once again got cold. "God, why is it so cold?" She asked.
"That's what it feels like to be around an unhappy ghost." He mumbled simply. He stood behind her. "I should go-"
"No, no, you're not leaving me again. Not while I'm still breathing." She said sternly. She turned to face him and her eyes widened at the sight of him now that they were under the street light. He was very thin. His once unruly, crazy hair was dangling at his shoulders. His eyes were darker, not their usual dirty green color.
"I told you." He mumbled, running his hand through his slick hair.
"We need to-" She gasped at the cold, her breath coming out in mist. "God, BeeJay, it's free-freezing!" She hissed, hugging herself tightly.
"Why are ya wearin' such a revealing dress anyway?" He asked. Lydia felt goosebumps. His voice had some emotion in it and that warmed her heart. She wanted him to be okay, she needed to keep it going.
She smirked slightly, pulling the skirt out and turning side to side, "What? You don't like it?" She asked teasingly.
"Not now, Lydia." He said seriously, looking around to avoid looking at her.
"Right." She said seriously. "What exactly do you... crave?" She asked, having a good idea of what he had in mind, she grimaced.
He cocked his head to the side and he started to wander off past her. Lydia followed him with her gaze, wondering where he was going. She started following after him curiously. He stopped over a steaming manhole cover.
"Can ya say buffet?" He mumbled, patting his flat stomach. He started sinking in through the cover.
Lydia ran over, "Wait!" She called. He stopped, his head being the only thing on the surface. "How do I know you'll come back?" She asked, her voice worried and sad.
He sighed and Lydia shuddered, the cold air brushing over her shoulders dramatically. "You just hope I do, Lyds." He said before his head sunk into the hole.
Lydia felt bittersweet. On one side, there was a great chance he wouldn't come back. On a lighter note, she smiled, he called her Lyds.
Lydia turned around abruptly, coming face to face with Morgan, who just two feet away, tripped on her own feet and fell forward. Lydia caught her, struggling not to drop her. She helped her back to her feet and waited until she recomposed herself.
"Why are ya out 'ere all alone?" She asked. Her words were slurred together and her breath reeked, maybe worst than Beetlejuice's.
"I wasn't alone. I was with a friend." She said with a slight smile which vanished quickly.
Morgan looked around Lydia, "Where is he now?" She asked, sounding like a confused three year old. A drunk three year old.
"He went to get something to eat." She said simply, giving the manhole a glance.
Morgan furrowed her eyebrows and pouted, "Why din't ya bring 'em to da party? There's lotsa food in there." She said, swinging her arm back toward the house.
Lydia figured there was no point in lying, Morgan probably didn't understand most of what she was saying. "He doesn't eat what we do." She answered honestly.
Morgan started to nod her head over-dramatically, "Ohh, I get it!" She wailed, pointing a finger at Lydia and waving it up and down. Lydia considered that Morgan knew something for a moment. She became nervous. "He's a vegitrinarian!" She said smartly. All worry wiped off Lydia's face. She understood Morgan was trying to say vegetarian. "Personally, I dun like veggies! I like- I love soup." She managed to say before zoning off.
Lydia furrowed her eyebrows, waving a hand in front of Morgan's face but she just stared past her. Lydia turned around to see if there was anything there but there was nothing interesting, just some trick or treaters passing by.
"Have you been smoking, Morgan?" She asked scolding. Morgan didn't respond. Lydia gave her a shove in the shoulder. Her head snapped to face her friend. Morgan grinned, looking at her with expectant eyes. That's when Lydia noticed how glassy they were. "You're stoned, Morgan!" She shouted accusingly.
Morgan jammed her palm into Lydia's mouth, tripping on her feet. Lydia stumbled, trying to keep both her and Morgan's footing. Lydia slapped her friends hands away angrily. "Shh, shh, Lyddie! We can't have anybody knowing!" She tried to whisper but she was talking pretty loud. It was annoying.
"Aren't you supposed to be at the house, watching over everything? How are you going to do that when you're totally wasted?" She asked her friend, hoping she'd make sense of it.
Morgan seemed to think hard about it. Her head snapped up and realization dawned on her face. She gasped as it all hit her at once, "I came 'ere to find ya! Come on, you're missin' all da fun back there!" She said, going to grab Lydia's wrist but totally missing, grabbing at air.
Lydia looked from her own arm to Morgan's and then at Morgan's confused face with a raised eyebrow. She was hopelessly wasted. "Come on, Morgan." She said, grabbing her by the waist and walking her back to the house. This was going to be a loooong night.
A/N: Again, I want to apologize for taking so long to update this story! I had no idea what to do but luckily, I got an idea and quickly used it! I know I don't deserve them for having left this abandoned so long but please review and let me know what you thought, I need to know people still like this and want to follow it through! Not that I have this chapter out of the way, new ones will be coming around more often! I don't blame you if you have lost interest or believe it's going downhill :(
I think that maaaayyybeeee I rushed them into being less depressed but I couldn't help it, I want them to be friends again! Don't you? :')