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Fanfic Challenge 2010 - Round 2 Assignment- abandoned prompt: Reid/Hotch, Song Title: A Beautiful Lie (30 Seconds to Mars)
A Beautiful Lie
Time passed entirely too slowly as he stared at his watch for the fourth time in the last fifteen minutes. Pulling his corduroy jacket closer around his slim body, he tried not to grow annoyed.
After all, he'd agreed to this.
This beautiful lie.
Well constructed and intricate, filled with intrigue that would deceive even the most trained eye, no one had unearthed their secret. They'd both become far too adept at subterfuge. And
And no one, not even after a year and a half, was the wiser.
Which was a verifiable miracle, considering the company they kept.
Some days he wondered if it was worth it. Who wouldn't want to shout their love for the person they adored most in the world from the rooftops of the Federal building? What normal person wouldn't want the right to walk into a dimly lit romantic restaurant and hold the hand of the man he loved?
He did. He was normal..well, at least in this respect…and he desired what every other red blooded man did.
But it wasn't to be. Not now and probably not ever.
There were far too many rules for that. Too many complications. He'd had to settle for what he'd been offered.
His life had been reduced to standing in the near freezing temperatures three streets away from his lover's apartment in front of a hotel they'd frequented many times before. Being seen as overnight guests at each other's apartments would have raised questions.
Weren't their lives filled with enough questions as it was?
First, what would they tell his son? Second, what if a neighbor saw and got suspicious...or God forbid, one of their colleagues unexpectedly showed up?
What if indeed?
No, this was easier.
Most of the time.
But tonight he was cold, Aaron was late, and he yearned for the simple normalcy most couples took for granted.
Maybe he'd been crazy to have ever commenced with a relationship he knew was doomed to this sort of existence. But when Aaron Hotchner's dark eyes had narrowed on him in interest and he'd seen the small flame of attraction, he'd been helpless not to fan it. They'd always worked closely together, and seducing him in a shared hotel room that long ago night had been fairly easy. They'd each wanted each other, both long denying their mutual need.
And when it was done, and he'd expected Aaron to push him away...to raise his self-imposed protective shields back into place, the older man had simply held his naked body closer, wrapping his arms and legs around him. And in the morning, he'd been loathe to shower, his lover's scent thick and heavy against his skin.
After that, they'd tumbled into their affair of sorts, sharing rooms on cases, satisfying their base urges within the other's body on a fairly regular basis. Sometimes gentle, sometimes not, their trysts always satisfied him in a way nothing in his life ever had. Aaron's kiss could quell those demons inside him...still the voices in his head that tortured him in spite of his best efforts to the contrary. In his arms, there were no doubts, no questions...simply acceptance.
Almost a year later, Hotch had finally admitted to himself and to him that he loved him. Not as a friend or a colleague, but as a man...and it was every bit as powerful as what he'd felt for his one-time wife. For a moment, he'd felt a glimmer of hope.
Perhaps, they could be the family he yearned to be.
But those thoughts were quickly diminished when Aaron had softly explained that while those feelings were strong and real, they could never be that family unit he'd foolishly hoped for. Jack, already confused by his mother's death, couldn't be asked to accept yet another change in his life, especially one that would confuse mightily. The Bureau, if they ever learned of what the two men shared, would most certainly separate them, those fraternization rules in place for a reason.
The risks of openly admitting their relationship were far too great…and losing the relationship was not a possibility.
So they'd continued with their perfect, beautiful lie.
Jumping slightly as a solid familiar arm slid around his narrow waist, pulling him back against a muscled chest, Spencer relaxed immediately, recognizing that touch. "You're here," he murmured, turning into Hotch's embrace.
"Strauss caught me on the way out," Aaron apologized. "You should have gone in without me."
"I didn't mind," Reid lied, amazed how easily the prevarication rolled off his tongue. "We always go in together. Can you stay the night?" he asked hopefully.
Smiling, Hotch glanced left then right, assuring their privacy before dipping his head and deftly claiming Reid's cool lips. "Two nights," he murmured hungrily. "Jack's grandparents wanted the entire weekend and the entire team is on stand down. That's why I was late; Strauss was filling me in."
"Really?" Reid breathed happily, the thought of two uninterrupted days and nights with his lover already interesting his body in an obvious way, a rare and unexpected delight that made all his earlier darker thoughts all but evaporate underneath the firm pressure of Hotch's mouth. Sure, they'd barely leave the room, calling for takeout while one of them stayed in the bathroom, but so what?
He could live the lie.
As long as he could live it with this man.
"Really." Hotch smiled against his lover's cold skin. "Ready to go inside and begin our weekend together?"
Hitching his black satchel over his shoulder, Reid nodded eagerly. "Definitely," he murmured as he grinned, following Hotch inside the dim lobby.
It might all be a complete fabrication, real only in their own minds. But this relationship was the closest to heaven he'd ever neared.
If a beautiful lie was what it took to keep it, he was more than prepared to make the sacrifice.