A/N: Always so much thanks to jessypt for beta love.
I try to keep notes brief, but I have to take a moment to thank all my readers. Whether you review or not, you are sincerely appreciated. I've been making a greater effort to reply to reviews lately because they totally make my day. I'm sorry for delays between chapters. I'm a single mama of a very energetic 5 year old, I just started a new position at work, and I'm coming off 9 days straight without a day off. Life is crazy, but it's blessed. I also wanted to extend a thank you and welcome to anyone who shared and/or found MiaP through rec of another reader or site. The simple fact that people enjoy my writing enough to tell their friends about it is all the validation I need. You're all amazing, sexy, and very pretty.
Oh, and sorry for the cockblock. Lemme get to what you really want . . . ;)
I quickly undressed myself and pulled two big, fluffy towels from the linen closet in Edward's bathroom. I didn't want to waste any time before he joined me. He had already placed my toiletry bag on the counter, so I dug out what I needed and threw myself under the stream of hot water.
I hadn't looked at this shower closely before, but once I was inside I couldn't help but admire it. It was enormous with a rainfall showerhead and an L-shaped bench. The door was glass, which made me a little self-conscious, but that was something I just needed to accept. The walls were real marble, glistening as the water hit them.
Talk about a fantasy shower.
Pulling myself together, I got to work with my razor. It had only been a day since I'd shaved, and I hadn't planned for anything like this tonight, but I couldn't escape the voice in the back of my head that wanted everything to be perfect.
I heard Edward come into the bathroom shortly after I'd finished, and he asked if it was still okay for him to join me. I told him it was, and he mentioned that he had brought the baby monitor in, just in case.
He was always thinking of me and Ruthie. Goosebumps ran down my arms that had nothing to do with temperature.
I turned my back to the door when he came in, facing the water and trying not to shake nervously. This was good. I wanted it. I wanted him. None of that prevented my gasp when he ran a hand down my shoulder and pressed his naked body against my back. His arms wrapped around my waist, and I willed myself to relax.
"Do you have any idea how incredibly sexy you are?" he asked, his voice low and strained. "Your body is so gorgeous. Perfect."
"I'm not perfect," I muttered as he took my hands.
"Shh . . . you are. Perfect for me, baby."
I could feel all of him against my skin, but I was frozen in place. He was significantly taller than me, but not too tall. His arms kept me completely wrapped up in him, and his body was firm and defined. I felt safe and protected in his arms. Security was finally starting to be the norm, though it had taken time for me to accept it. Then there was his cock, resting against the small of my back, making my mind spin with desire.
"Turn around, Bella. Let me see you," he said softly. There was no demand, but I couldn't deny him, that voice, those beseeching green eyes when I cocked my head to look at him.
Very slowly, I released his hands and began to turn. He never fully relinquished his hold on me, but he allowed me to move freely until I was facing him. My eyes were closed until he tipped my chin up and pressed a soft kiss to my lips.
My eyes raked up and down his body, the cut of his muscles overwhelming me like it always did. He was becoming aroused, and I hoped the shower would hide my blush. I wasn't inexperienced by any means, but this was different; it was special. It didn't seem real that this amazing man was mine, especially given the circumstances under which we'd met. He was, though, and I adored him.
"You okay?" he asked, and I nodded, smiling slightly.
We turned together, allowing him to step beneath the spray, and my heart beat wildly at the sight of his wet, disheveled hair, water rushing over every contour of his body.
"You are so damn hot," I told him, reaching my arms up and winding them around his neck so he would lean down and kiss me. He pressed close, our bodies molding together again, trapping my breasts against him. I knew they would probably leak, but I didn't worry about that in the shower; I was able to focus on the way he made me feel and all the ways I wanted to touch him. I squeaked when his hands covered my butt and squeezed tightly, making me involuntarily press harder against him.
He pulled back, reminding me of his request to take care of me, and I allowed him to wash my hair, scrubbing the shampoo in with massaging fingertips and later taking care to work in the conditioner to my long hair. I returned the favor, laughing as I made a mohawk and haphazard spikes with his hair. When he moved on to the body wash, I lost control. I had accepted being fully exposed to him there in the shower, but the way he touched me was too much. He used his hands, gently lathering the fragrant soap and carefully, slowly cleansing my skin. He peppered my body was kisses as the suds washed away – on my neck, shoulders, stomach, and even the back of my thighs.
"Edward," I panted over and over again, but he didn't stop.
He saved the best for last, running his soapy hand between my legs, teasing me, torturing me, and then he had me pressed to the shower wall, his mouth devouring mine. I was gasping and moaning. He worked his way down my neck, nipping at my skin, and his hands were cupping my breasts gently, lightly flicking at my nipples. I didn't stop him, far too caught up in how incredible he made me feel. My eyes fell closed, and my hands wound into his hair in an attempt to keep myself anchored. Lower and lower he moved until his lips were on my chest, then finally, carefully circling my nipples with his tongue. He moved back and forth a few times, taking care not to be rough. He didn't have to be directed; he just seemed to know the perfect amount of pressure without hurting me. Even slower still, he kissed his way back up over my collar bone, neck, cheeks, and kissed me again.
"Bella." He said my name reverently, pushing his hands into my hair and looking into my eyes. "Do you have any idea what you do to me?" As if to punctuate his statement he pressed his erection to my leg, making my entire body shudder.
"I am absolutely addicted to you, baby. You mean everything to me, and I'm so in love with you."
A sort of whimper escaped from my throat, and I felt like I would burst. He had worked my body into such a frenzy, then pulled my heart into the beautiful chaos. I couldn't speak just then, so I pulled his mouth to mine, kissing him hard and meaningfully.
"Tell me something. Anything," he begged, sliding his slick, wet body against mine with purpose.
"Oh god . . . . Yes. Everything you said. I didn't stand a chance against you, Edward. How could I not fall in love?"
He immediately hugged me tightly, burying his face in my neck for a moment before he brought his mouth back to mine. I let him put space between us and felt his hand move back between my legs, fingers slipping easily inside me.
"Fuck," he groaned. "You feel so good."
I nearly fell apart, but he continued. As the sensation built, I reached down and touched him for the first time. He was hard and heavy in my hand, and his whole body jerked as I began to stroke him. I responded to his reactions, applying pressure when I heard his breath hitch and twisting my wrist at the head so my palm pushed against the tip. He swore a few more times, clutching at me, and I knew he was close when he stopped touching me. One hand grasped my shoulder and the other pressed to the wall for support as he leaned closer. I quickened my pace until he came, a fast, hot spurt hitting my stomach. He breathed heavily for a minute, finally pulling himself upright and kissing me.
"Go dry off and get on the bed. I'll be right there," he instructed.
"Edward, I –" I tried to protest, not wanting him to get too carried away.
"Trust me," he said simply, smiling down at me and pushing the shower door open.
As I dried myself, I glanced back through the glass door and saw him hastily soaping up. I towel-dried my hair as I walked back into the bedroom and tossed the towel over the back of a nearby chair. It felt awkward to just get into bed naked and wait, but it turned out I didn't have to. Edward was behind me as if out of nowhere, lifting me onto the bed and positioning me at the edge. He knelt in front of me and pushed my legs apart.
"Wait," I urged, trying to close my legs and slow him down. I'd had a baby; things had to be different down there, and I wasn't particularly comfortable with Edward being that close to my lady parts.
"Please," he said, hands on my knees and the most heart-melting look in his eyes. "Let me make you feel good, love." He started kissing my knees, working his way inward, back and forth between my inner thighs until I gave in and let him have what he wanted. Every inch of me, inside and out, was alight with anticipation and need.
He was everything and more than I had expected. My body bucked unexpectedly when I felt his tongue press against the warm, wet flesh of my pussy. He licked me upward, focusing on my clit. His lips and tongue worked together, driving me mad, and when I thought I couldn't take more, he slid his fingers back into me and worked them together until I fell apart, pushing up against his face. Both of us spent, he flattened his cheek to my stomach and caught his breath. I felt tingly and exhausted in the most wonderful way.
When he stood and moved toward the bed, he directed me to lay with my head on the pillow so he could hold me. I fell into his arms happy and sated, a smile plastered on my face. He kissed the top of my head, hugging me close.
"I love you, Bella," he said against my hair.
"I love you," I answered, hooking my leg over his. He groaned but didn't move.
"How long do you think it will be 'til Ruthie wakes up?" he asked, and I lightly smacked him.
"Don't jinx it!"
He chuckled, but I still got up and put on my nursing bra and pajamas. I couldn't sleep without the support, and as much as I wanted to stay naked and close to Edward, I would rather be prepared when the baby woke for her nighttime feeding. Out of habit, I walked to the guest room and peeked in on Ruthie, happy to find her fast asleep. I stood there by the side of the play pen for several minutes just watching her. She was so peaceful and perfect, and I was absolutely blessed to have her. Despite all the hard parts, she was worth it.
"She's beautiful, just like her mommy," I heard behind me as Edward kissed my cheek. "Come on, let's go get some sleep." I acquiesced and followed him into the bedroom where he pulled back the covers and settled into bed with me.
He lay on his back, and I curled up against him with my head on his shoulder and an arm and a leg thrown over him.
"No more doubts, baby. Okay?" he said in the quiet darkness.
"I don't think I've ever doubted you," I told him honestly. "Sometimes I just feel like I'm not worth all the effort. That you'd eventually get tired of us being so needy."
"You're not needy," he said as if I'd offended him. "You're an amazing woman who has been through a tough time, but it won't be like that anymore. You will always have me to protect and care for you and the baby."
"I'm sorry," I said for what felt like the tenth time. I didn't want my self-doubts, and they were certainly waning, but sometimes little things lingered in the back of my subconscious. "You're just too good to be true sometimes." I turned my face and kissed his chest.
"I think the same thing about you all the time. I mean it, Bella. I love you."
"I love you, too."
"Thank you for that," he said quietly. "Now let's sleep."
"Yes, sir," I teased.
We were both silent, and just as I was drifting off I heard Edward say, "I love having you in my bed. Sweet dreams."