Summary: Sasuke, Sakura, and a hot spring. What could go wrong? Oh, right. Everything.
Disclaimer: Disclaiming Naruto.
Theme: Chance Meetings
Rating: T or M for nudity and discussion of genitalia.
Warning(s): Slightly sexual theme, maybe?
Comments: I'm pretty sure this is crack, but I don't know for sure. XD Here's some brain-vomit written at the last moment.
Sasuke disliked the summer. It was easy to train in the winter, when he could speed his heart rate up, but in the summer there was no way to tone down the heat, his fireball jutsu only making things worse. It felt like all he could do was pant and sweat, his shirt slipping off his shoulders even though he didn't like the way Orochimaru looked at him. His skin reddened and got tender so blows and scratches were three times as bad—Sasuke never tanned, only burned, like a lobster.
Some days, summer seemed so oppressive that he would have to forgo training that day and visit an outlying village for a bath, hoping the water would cool him down at least a little bit.
This was one of those days.
The village was small and lacked separate baths—it was mixed bathing. Sasuke didn't especially care; woman or man, whoever was staring at him was annoying. He usually changed his appearance, since he was a wanted criminal and all, and this time was no exception—he changed his hair and eyes, also hiding the curse seal.
Nobody was in the baths, so Sasuke disrobed, grabbed a towel, and sank into the water. The water was even warmer than the outside temperature, so getting out would feel like heaven. Now, though, Sasuke just felt like he was suffocating.
Sasuke never allowed himself the pleasure of relaxation, but his muscles got a little less tense, some of the kinks getting massaged out.
Sakura loved the summer. Being sent on missions when it was beautiful outside made everything seem bright, optimistic, and beautiful. She lived for the sweat sliding down her skin and the sun beating on her back. She'd picked up a few skin protection jutsu from Tsunade that meant she never burned, and could tan as she pleased. Even Ino had said that the tan on her skin contrasted with her pink hair in a lovely way.
Mostly, she loved swimming and bathing, cooling off only to feel the sun again. So on her way back from a long mission, she took the leisure of taking a break at a bath. She'd hesitated upon finding out that it was mixed-gender, but she wanted her bath, damnit. She wrapped herself in a towel with the knowledge that she could seriously injure and probably kill anybody who bothered to look the wrong way with a single punch.
She pinned up her hair with a towel to stop it from getting wet, and strode out to the bathing area. There was only a man with ruffled brown hair and blue eyes, who didn't seem to pay her much attention, so she sank into the water.
Sasuke got five minutes of peace before somebody else entered, a woman about his age with a towel on her head. She had a smile on her face, but didn't deign to address him, just sinking into the water across from her.
After a few minutes of silence, she said in a placid sigh, "You're using genjutsu."
"You're using jutsu of some sort as well," he replied after a moment. That moment had been spent wondering where he knew the voice from, but he had to be imagining things.
"Sunblocking," she said dismissively. "You, on the other hand, are hiding who you are."
"It's better that way," Sasuke replied, and there was another peaceful pause, but Sasuke was slightly tenser than before.
"You look like you could use the sunblocking jutsu," the woman observed. "Your skin is really red—that could lead to skin cancer." That scolding voice—it was like he'd heard it before, just not directed at him. The heat must have been muddling his mind.
"Aa," he replied, and she jerked in surprise. He looked at her with confusion, but she waved her hand dismissively with a small laugh.
"Sorry, sorry! Just a…shiver. Yes." She was a terrible liar. "So, where are you from?"
"Sound," Sasuke said. This village was an ally of Sound, so it shouldn't be unusual for hear this. And yet, she stiffened again. "And you?" he asked.
"Um…Rock," she said, once again obviously lying. This time he decided to call her out on it.
"You're lying a lot. Have something to hide?"
"Says the guy in the genjutsu," she challenged.
"It's better this way."
"It's the same in my case."
Sasuke kneaded his eyebrow. "You're from the Leaf, aren't you."
She froze, confirming his theory. "Wh—why would you think that?"
"Only Leaf ninja could be so annoying," he couldn't resist sneering.
She jumped up, apparently not even noticing that she was exposing herself naked. "I—I have to go," she said tightly. Her legs were trembling. And then the towel on her hair came undone and slid down.
Sasuke did a double take. "Sakura?"
Her mood completely changed. There was now a kunai at his throat, and he really didn't want to know where she'd gotten the kunai from. But holy crap, it was Sakura. He should have known from the horrible lying and the tone of voice and those pretty—I mean obvious—green eyes. He really was slow in the summer—he hadn't even been able to react to her rushing him, and now she was straddling him. Naked. With a kunai tracing over his Adam's apple.
"How do you know my name?" she gritted out.
Oh, that's right. He was still transformed. He knew it would infuriate her, so he answered her question with another question. "What are you doing so far from home?"
Her thighs pressed into his and he was having some issues maintaining his composure. It was the heat. The heat, damn it. Her body heat. Wait, no, just the water heat! The water!
She put the kunai in between her lips and formed the 'release' seals—clearly, she was attempting to forcibly break his genjutsu. Sasuke allowed himself a chuckle at her expression of frustration when it didn't work. She raised her fist, obviously intending to hit him and break the jutsu like that. Like her little slap could do any—OW! As Sasuke's head hit the concrete behind him, only his feet still in the bath, it occurred to him that they were still both naked. His head spun—one more hit like that and he'd definitely lose the genjutsu even with his skill. Figuring it couldn't be helped, he got into a defensive position—she was actually attacking him, naked, every part of her exposed.
Don't get distracted, he told himself. They're just breasts. Look away, they're not even impressive, probably only Bs. I mean. No! He barely got out of his stupor to block her high kick, exposing shapely legs. "What else do you know about the Leaf?" she demanded. "Who are you?"
He easily dodged her every move, but he didn't have quite enough time to retaliate—she just kept coming. He realized he had somehow gotten backed up against the wooden fence and could register only that before her fist plowed into his cheek. There went the genjutsu.
When the splinters and dust faded, and she got a good look at him, she stumbled back. "S—Sasuke!"
"That good-looking, huh?" he said with the best smirk he could conjure up with them both naked, trying to deflate the situation, because he didn't want to cause a scene in this village, since he visited it all too often. "Get back in the water. Or don't, I'm enjoying the view."
Sakura followed his gaze downwards, then blushed furiously and bounded back into the water. "Sasuke!" she scolded from in the bath. "What are you doing, not protecting yourself from the sun? You could get skin cancer and that would suck, because you have such nice, fair skin although it's probably green and pale from being in Orochimaru's base. Seriously, you need to take care of yourself!"
"When you come back to Konoha, I'm making sure you stay for regular checkups," she grumbled. "Honestly, you're way too skinny, although your muscular structure isn't so bad." She looked up at his dumbfounded expression. "What, you're expecting me to react to your naked body? I'm a medic, I see naked guys all the time."
Now it was Sasuke who felt self-conscious, moving a hand to cover his lower regions.
"No use," Sakura said brightly. "I've already seen it, and it's smaller than average."
Sasuke spluttered. "I'm growing!" And he was so not smaller than average, he was an Uchiha, he was well-endowed as a rule!
"You're probably a grower," she corrected with a smirk. "Let me guess, you carry around a long sword to overcompensate?"
"It's okay," she consoled him. "Naruto's is still smaller."
"I don't want to know about Naruto's…!" the word caught in his throat.
"Penis," Sakura completed calmly. Sasuke flinched, and Sakura laughed. "You have so much growing to do, Sasuke. And not just physically, but growing up."
She rose out of the water, exposing herself, till she picked up the towel and wrapped it around her torso. "Come back to Konoha sometime. Naruto doesn't get it, but I understand that you're choosing to train here. That's fine, but once Orochimaru is dead, come back to us and we'll get your brother killed. Together. See you around." She sauntered off, with one last look before she entered the locker room. "Don't get anyone pregnant!"
Sasuke figured that after this, he'd be impotent for life.
He really, really hated the summer.