Hey guys! Sorry I haven't updated in...forever. I'm a grad student, I really don't have time anymore. :( But anyway, here's the next chapter!
Growing up was a part of life. A part Ron had tried to resist for many years. But now he had children to think about. What is best for them?
"Daddy I'm hungry!" Rose bounded into the living room, dressed in a full ballerina costume, fluffy tutu, tiara, and all.
"C'mon Rose, let's get some food. What do you want to eat?" Ron asked, hoisting her up on his hip.
"Well today is Red day, so something red." Rose pondered.
"Red day? What is red day?" He asked setting her on the kitchen counter.
"It means I only wear red," she pointed to her clothes, "and I only eat red things!" she pointed to a tomato.
Well if it means she eats vegetables, Ron would go along with just about anything. "Alright, Red day it is! How about some tomatoes? And some whole wheat pasta?"
Rose thought about it for a minute then declared, "As long as the pasta turns red with the sauce, then TECHNICALLY it's ok." She smiled sweetly up at her father.
"Yes, I believe the pasta will turn red. Is Hugo alright with Red day?" Ron asked while pouring the pasta into a pot of boiling water.
"No, but I made him be ok with it!" Rose answered cheekily. "Dad, when is Mummy coming home?" She slumped on the counter.
"I'm right here! And watch your posture, Rose. You don't want to end up with back problems do you?" Hermione popped up in the kitchen window, attempting to scare Rose and Ron.
"Mummy! You scared me!" Rose squealed.
"I'm glad I did! You two might have gossiped about me." Hermione, who had come around into the kitchen, tickled Rose's sides.
"N-never Mummy!" Rose stammered out between her laughs. "We love you!"
"Yeah, we only say good things about you, like how lovely your hair is today!" Ron stated, carrying the bowl of steaming pasta to the kitchen island.
"My hair does look rather lovely today!" Hermione struck a pose and ran her fingers through her hair. In truth, her hair was a wild mess, having just walked through the windstorm outside.
She had gotten back from Harry's moments ago, where she and the children had eaten lunch. She was trying to fill in the spot that was soon to be vacated by Ginny. She knew it was wrong, preemptively taking over Ginny's role but she also knew Ginny wouldn't ask for full custody. If anything she would hand everything over to Harry. But Ginny was also unpredictable. It was hard to know what she would do.
Hermione was starting to feel like she was the mother in two families. Logically, she knew it was wrong. Emotionally, her heart was full to the brim with happiness: that she could make so many people happy. But she had the sinking feeling everything would blow up in her face and soon.
"Mummy?" Rose tugged on the hem of her shirt. "It's Red day. You're not wearing red."
"Oh it's Red day?" She quirked and eyebrow at Ron, "And what do we do on Red day? Other than wear red?"
"Well, you wear red and eat red things! So Daddy made us pasta with tomato sauce. The pasta isn't really red, but that's ok." She skipped over to the dinner table, her tutu flying with.
"Well, Rosie, honey, your tutu is pink…" Hermione cautiously informed her daughter.
"Mom! Pink is a shade of red. Didn't you know that?" Rose looked up at her mother from her chair. "Honestly, I was taught that in kinder. You should remember that." She huffed and whipped back to eat her lunch.
"We've created a sassy daughter, love." Ron siddled up to Hermione, kissing her temple before setting a salad on the table.
"But Dad! That's green!" Rose yelled and crossed her arms over her chest. "I cannot eat that!"
"You won't eat it, but you can physically eat it." Ron pointed out. "Now please go get your brother."
"Fine! But I'm not eating that green!" She huffed and stomped up the stairs.
"Sassy indeed," Hermione agreed, staring out the window.
Ron watched her and contemplated everything. Their relationship wasn't toxic; rather, it was far from terrible. Yet he couldn't help feeling it was all falling away from him.
He was angry, yes, that Hermione was choosing Harry, just like he feared all those years ago. But he also knew if he hadn't acted, Harry would've gotten the girl. On some level, he felt they would end up together eventually but he kept hoping he was enough for Hermione, that the life they'd built together was enough. It wasn't fair to Hermione, but it wasn't fair to him either. And the worst part was he didn't have anyone to blame, not even himself.
Watching his wife stare out the window, he felt the beginnings of the end and he was powerless to stop it. But he would never stand in the way of her happiness. Never.
Part of me wondered, what the HELL am I doing? That was only a small part. Most of me is just exhausted. I can't take this anymore. The nightmares, the constant worry of setting him off, always being cautious… it's enough to make a woman go mad. That's what I did. I slowly went mad.
And then I think of my children. My wonderful, sweet, innocent children, and I wonder if I can really go through with the divorce. We've tried getting him help. I took him to so many healers! Nothing worked! After Lilly was born, he was ok, but those damned nightmares came back. How can I live that way? How can he? Doesn't he want to stop them? I know he only sometimes takes the potions, and I never know when. So how do I know if they're working? I don't. The divorce is best for all of us.
But is it? How can I justify it? I will look like the woman who couldn't handle her husband, the woman who couldn't help him, and the woman who gave up on him. But I just can't do it anymore! I will destroy myself if I stay. Who am I kidding? I'm ripping myself to shreds thinking about this on my tour. I can't even focus enough to play for half, HALF, a game. I've been benched for the next two games.
This is not a question of if I love Harry. I love him, so much, which is why this is so hard. How can I let him go? I love him, I love my children, and we are a family. I've already sent the divorce papers, so what's done is done. Harry wrote me, asking to hold of on the proceedings until I come home, which at this rate might be sooner rather than later. Oy…
Okay! Let me know what you think. Also, major thank you to everyone who has favorited this story (my other works, or my account in general). I appreciate the feedback, please no flames or anger. Thanks again!