After we planted that tree I knew we'd be friends for a long time. But then, another idea also occurred to me. Bryce Loski cared about me! It was honestly hard to believe. I knew Bryce liked me, a lot.
Suddenly, it dawned on me that I don't know if I feel the same way about him too. Usually, I'd be the stubborn girl I usually am but with Bryce it was always hard to do that.
I don't know if I could just be friend with a guy like that… His dazzling eyes and his gorgeous self was hard enough to even a hold a grudge on. I contemplated the mixed emotions I was having right now. I decided to try and be polite and put Bryce's feeling first. So I felt the need to at least let him know about our relationship status at the moment.
"Bryce, I respect you. I would love for us to be friends. But I can't tell if I'm ready for a relationship right now. Would you be okay with that for right now? You and I would just be friends." I hardly smiled. It felt like saying that was a huge lie. Even though every word I said was exactly honest. It just felt like something was misplaced. It felt like after saying that I was empty.
He nodded his head at me and flashed me an attractive smile. What was that all about? Even though, it wouldn't be my intention to see Bryce be upset with my decision. I kind of wanted to see a hint of sorrow that I wouldn't be his for the day.
"Even if we are just friends, can I take you out on a date? You know just as friends, so we get to know each other more?" My smile grew from ear to ear. Bryce Loski has interest in me. I felt so amazed with myself. He chose me instead of a million other girls. It was simply amazing considering one of those girls in that huge crowd was Sherry Stalls.
I felt energy charge through my body after I stood tall looking at that tree. Juli Baker the prettiest girl in the whole school was standing next to me and helping me plant that tree. I stared into Juli's eyes and saw a whole life with her.
Hopefully, she says yes when I ask her out on a date. I really want to tell her how I feel but it was too difficult to put it into words. I decided I should take one step at a time and start off with asking her to go out tonight.
Even asking her out was difficult! I could ask out any other girl but Juli just makes me tighten up and feel frozen. Should I try and be cool about it? Or should I try and be sweet and romantic about the situation? I'm overthinking this way too much. What is it about Juli that makes me nervous? She's just your average girl. Right? I couldn't exactly pinpoint it at the moment but all I knew was I'd do anything for her.
She interrupted my thoughts and said, "Bryce, I respect you. I would love for us to be friends. But I can't tell if I'm ready for a relationship right now. Would you be okay with that for right now? You and I would just be friends."
After I heard that it felt like someone threw a ton of bricks at my heart. I'd never felt like this before. She respect me? What does that even mean? I didn't want her to see my pain and how easily I let my walls down so I nodded and smiled. "Sure." That was a complete lie! It doesn't even matter though. Like I said before, I'll do anything for her. I was going to tell her about my feelings towards her no matter what. "Even if we are just friends, can I take you out on a date? You know just as friends, so we get to know each other more?" When I asked her my heart skipped a beat. When she smiled and said yes I felt hope.
Maybe she would be my girlfriend after all. If she turned me down I'd find any way to get her to be mine.