For anyone who doesn't know... These characters belong to CP Coulter, author of the Glee fanfiction, 'Dalton'. If you haven't read it, please do. Maybe then you can read this. :)
It's not very good - the idea's been floating around in my head, and when I found out CP was updating soon... It had to get written, whether it was written well or not. So I did this in about three hours in the middle of the night. Ugh, my headache.
Check it out, anyway, and let me know what you think. :)
[Consider this my official boarding of the Gondola]
Out of twenty-four hours, on average, eleven to twelve of them are daylight. That other half is occupied by the nearly silent humming of bugs, the hooting of owls, things that go bump in the night. Tonight, one of those things is John Logan Wright III.
Everyone has those nights, right? He thinks. Those ones where… Where you just can't sleep, and there's something keeping you up, but you can't quite place a finger on it. He shakes his head. He's not even making sense to himself.
And so, with a heavy sigh, the Stuart prefect slides out from under his crumpled sheets, feet touching the cool floor with a quiet thud. He winces – after eleven P.M., everything seems louder than it really is.
As quietly as possible, Logan pads across his room to the door, knowing enough to avoid the especially squeaky floorboards of the old house. When he finally reaches the door, he pauses, holding his breath – voices are coming from the room next door. He's surprised he hadn't heard them before; they're actually pretty loud. Wait, he thinks. Is that…? Is that Julian, yelling at Derek?
Curious, he leans his ear against the wall, still straining to make absolutely no noise. The voices issue right through the thin wood, and as he listens, he becomes more and more intrigued.
"Julian! You can't just leave us like this. You can't leave Logan like this! Do you have any idea – right. Of course you do. So just – just don't leave. If for no other reason… I swear, if he kills us all, I'm blaming it on you."
Logan can practically hear the actor rolling his eyes as he responds, "If you're dead, Derek, you can't blame anything on me. But whatever – I have to go. I can't… I just can't stay. Not like this. He wants Kurt. What's even the point?"
"But Julian, if you'd just tell him –"
"No, Derek! I –" Julian's voice seems to cut off, almost in a sob. Except he doesn't cry, so that doesn't make any sense. "Derek, I can't. I've tried, and I can't. I'm leaving."
A door slams, and Logan takes that to mean the conversation's over. So… What did he want to tell me? The blonde boy frowns to himself, and lets out a small, frustrated noise – the drugs are keeping him from doing much more. Great. Now I really won't be able to sleep.
Logan awakes the next morning after a good hour and a half of sleep. He rubs his eyes, yawns, tries to remember why on earth he was up so late.
He doesn't have to wonder for long.
At near lightning speed, he jumps out of bed. He skids across the floor, slipping on his rug and catching himself just before he can fall.
He jerks the door open and rushes across the hall, ready to scream at his best friend for not telling him – well, he doesn't really know what yet. His goal is to find out.
When he reaches Julian Larson-Armstrong's door, he grabs the frame, yet again catching himself from tumbling to the floor.
Logan yanks his friend's door open, only to find that his multiple saves were to no avail. He's just hit the worst drop – that feeling of your stomach falling, that isn't any fun unless it's on a roller coaster. And not even then, if you're –
He immediately directs his mind away from that train of thoughts that can only end in a monumental wreck. For the first time in his life, Logan has an "out of body experience" – he's running to Derek's room. He's told Julian's left, for good. He freaks out.
The next thing he remembers, he's in bed with a brunette head looking down at him. His heart leaps for a moment, until he realizes it's only Derek – he doesn't matter so much. The athlete looks up for a moment, calling to someone – something along the lines of "He's awake!" – and then Logan takes some more medicine, and he's gone.
Julian Larson-Armstrong regrets taking the part. It's only been a week, but he can already tell this whole thing isn't going to be any fun. His cast-mates suck. The story line sucks. His character isn't exactly what he expected – no, screw it. His character sucks.
But he goes with it. As if he's really gonna back out of this. And besides, he's definitely less miserable than he would be at Dalton, watching Logan attempting to quit pining after Kurt who's in love with Blaine who Logan also used to be "in love" with. Julian helped out as much as he could. He's done now. At least, here in Hollywood, there are more… People. People who can serve as distractions from him.
He has to wonder, though. When he left, he got a second phone so he could shut down the one everyone had the number for – (Maybe he should've just changed the number, but he's a superstar. Why not just get a second line?) – and now, after a week, is starting to wonder if he has any messages. The curiosity is eating at his stomach – he's pretty sure he's getting an ulcer – but he still refrains from checking. Because checking might lead to returning, and he just can't do that.
For almost two weeks now, Logan's been deep in a haze unlike any other he was used to before. This one's deep, and dark, and thick, and just so hard to get himself out of. He'd play music to try, but he's not completely sure he's even able to think. Its kind of how he imagines the mist accompanying Dementors would feel.
But, after a period of time that feels like for-freaking-ever, he begins to resurface from the murky waters of his very… randomly uncontrollable mind. He opens his eyes again to Derek, and is able to see well enough to note the other boy texting very angrily, muttering the words he types under his breath. Apparently, his message is pretty angry, because he's cursing every two or three words.
"You know, if you type hard enough, whoever you're messaging will understand just how angry you are better," Logan smirks at his friend.
Derek looks up, startled, evidently unaware of the fact that Logan was finally, fully awake. When he sees the piercing green eyes, one of few genuine smiles spreads across his face. "Yeah, yeah. I was just…"
Suddenly, the prefect's pleased expression disappears, and he's wearing a blank mask. "I know. You were messaging Julian the jerk." He laughs hollowly, and quotes what he had heard Derek muttering. "Something along the lines of 'Julian, you arsehole, get the hell back here right this freaking instant, dude, Logan needs you, damn it!'" The blonde's meaningless laugh makes a reappearance. "Well, Derek, you're wrong. I don't need him."
Derek thinks that in a dictionary of phrases, a picture of the look on Logan's face right now would probably accompany "If looks could kill".
He's about to inform Logan of this when his thoughts are abruptly cut off by his own ring-tone. He stares down at his phone in complete shock before shaking it off, snapping his mouth shut, and replying:
Then seriously, man. Catch the next flight. He's awake.
Returning to Dalton might be the hardest thing Julian's ever done. Okay, second hardest. Leaving for what he thought was the last time was first. But he had seriously let go, and moved on (sort of), and… Now he has to be back here. Because he just can't not support the boy he's secretly in love with.
He shakes his head in disgust with himself.
"Everything all right, Mr. Larson-Armstrong?" the limousine driver asks in a worried voice. Some people might be fooled by his tone, but Julian's well aware that his concern comes more from agitation over his tip than actual caring for the person he's transporting.
The star mutters something in response – even he's not quite sure what. The driver just nods, wearing the type of expression that simply screams 'Well, here's a story to tell the family tonight!'
As the limo pulls slowly up to the great gates of Dalton, Julian looks through the bars onto the grounds of… Is it still his school? He had thought he'd never visit here again. But here is, transferring back one more time. Right. His school.
He climbs out of the long car with the tinted windows – his return hadn't been announced, so the surrounding sidewalk is deserted. No screaming fangirls. Not even a screaming fanboy. It's the complete opposite of what he's adjusted to over the last couple of weeks. And as he stands there, hired help carrying his bags for him, and though he's finally going to be back with his friends… He feels undeniably lonely.
When Julian arrives, Logan's awake. As in, damn he's the most awake he's been in two weeks. Derek had snuck into his room just ten minutes before, informing him hesitantly that the actor had returned. And with that news, of course Logan was awake. He had two weeks worth of screaming to catch up on. Probably more so, because for once, he really has something to scream about.
Julian takes a deep breath outside of the door, and slowly, cautiously, twists the doorknob, expecting no less than an hour-long cussing out and verbal battle as soon as he steps over the threshold.
He's happily, if strangely, surprised.
When he enters, Logan's sitting straight up in bed. And even though he doesn't look very happy, at the very least he isn't yelling. Not yet, anyway.
So Julian looks at him with a quiet "Hi. I – I have some explaining to do, Logan."
The other boy continues with his icy glare. "Damn straight you do, Julian. So first of all – why would you just leave like that? No warning. No nothing!" The actor begins to answer tiredly, but the prefect cuts him off before he can really start – "No. And tell me this, Julian. What. The. Hell. Were you and Derek talking about the night before you left?" he glowers. And Julian answers in a tone so low he can barely even hear himself.
Logan's expression is a telltale sign that he didn't hear, either. So Julian takes an even deeper breath than his last, and repeats himself. "I'm in love with you, Logan. Since freshman year. And – wait! Don't say anything. Don't yell at me. I know it's… Weird. Just – put yourself in my shoes?"
And there's silence.
It's freshman orientation, and the entire main hall – the size of which is actually rather intimidating – is filled with rows upon rows of boys. Every available inch of seating is filled. With the exception of one chair.
It's in the Stuart section, next to a blonde teen who is carrying on a quiet conversation with the handsome youth next to him. The only person next to him, really. No one else looks comfortable enough to take the empty chair.
Until Julian Larson-Armstrong walks in. And Logan's struck, as if by a lightning bolt. Little does he know, in the next three years he'll grow accustomed to lesser versions of that emotion. But this is the first and only time something of this magnitude will ever hit him.
However, the other boy doesn't seem to care. He strolls nonchalantly down the aisle, fashionably late, and not even dressed in school uniform. The word "rebel" comes to mind. Everyone knows him, and the majority of the hall is feeling a bit star-struck at the moment. But Logan just smirks as Julian sits, and begins a conversation with the two boys who will become his best friends.
When Logan meets Blaine, he recognizes his feelings. The ones saying "Hey, I think I kind of like him." But that's all. Julian's straight, after all. And that first day… Logan was only taking note of the fact that he was attractive. Attractive, and famous, and –
But none of it mattered, because Logan was now in love. Or, at least, he had convinced himself he was.
Eventually, Logan forgets about his feelings for Julian. His emotions that, officially, had never existed. And he gives up – because what better way to waste time than secretly pining after your straight best friend?
Blaine, Joshua, and Kurt are lovely distractions.
The silence in the room feels as though it lasts an hour. Really, all these memories flash through the blonde prefect's mind in a matter of seconds. He knows he has to tell Julian. But first –
"Jules?" This is one of the few times in Logan's entire seventeen years that his voice has been quiet, uncertain. He's been singing since he was little, and the knowledge that he's insanely good always helps him sound confident – whether he's drawing out his vowels or not.
The brunette actor looks up from the floor, pleased to finally have a response. Any response. "Yeah?"
And before he can think, Logan's rushing towards him at twice the speed he had that morning he found out Julian had left. He's hurrying, to make sure he reaches the other boy before he can disappear again. And when he does, he puts his hand to the surprised actor's face, whispering "I think I have something to tell you."
It's been described as "like being caught in a sudden rain", "a burning, starting in the stomach and setting your whole body on fire". To Logan and Julian, it feels like they've just biked the Tour de France, and tied.
All I can say is, again, my head. :(
Also... so? :) Reviews are love. Or hate. Whichever you make them. :D