Yusei's Secret

By Female Heero Yuy

Disclaimer: If I owned Yu Gi Oh 5Ds this would be in the manga. XD

More over, this is for AMUSEMENT purposes...and I can see Yusei having this.


Crow like he always did was going over the monthly finances and bills, adding receipts and such together to ensure the debts they had was actually getting lower instead of higher. "Awww, we're still in the red." he scratched at his head as he looked over his notebook. "We're going to have to make cuts if we're going to get this stuff paid down. Guess we're not having meat this month." he sighed. "Hey...how come the necessities section has gone up?" he looked it over. Necessities being things such as toilet paper, tooth paste, shampoo and the like. "WE'RE AT ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY THIS MONTH? NO WAY!" his eyes bulged out of his sockets. "Wait a minute.." he flipped through the pages of his notebook for the previous months, each months was the same, they were always spending over one hundred. "There's no way this can be right! I've gotta talk to the guys." he got off his seat to go down stairs. Yusei was working on the D wheels while Jack was sitting on the sofa nearby. "Hey I need to talk to you guys." he started as he reached the ground level. "Is there any reason our necessities expenses have gone from eighty to one hundred and fifty in the past three months?"

Jack and Yusei looked at one another in confusion for a moment, then Yusei did something rather unusual. He shifted his gaze, something he only did when he knew the truth. "Uhh...I don't think so." he replied hesitantly.

Crow to say the least, was shocked. "YOU KNOW!" he pointed at the blackette. Within seconds he was on him like a hawk. "Spill! I want answers."

"No really..." Yusei stepped back a few steps before using his D wheel as a shield. Making it highly obvious he knew the reason.

"Yusei, whatever it is we can't afford to spend more than the bare minimums. That includes the cheapest toilet paper, dish soap, and even shampoos." he waved his notebook at him. "So whatever it is your spending excess money on stop it."

Yusei gave him a rather pathetic look. "But...I can't..." he practically whimpered.

"Why not?" Jack shouted at him in annoyance. He was peeved due to the fact that he always got a lecture when he spent outside of the budget, yet here was Yusei sneaking around like some sort of thief to get something he wanted.

"Because..." he started tapping his index fingers together nervously.

"Come on dude, i'm sure whatever it is your spending the money on, there's a cheaper version that does the same thing." Crow added. "It's like Martha always said, the store brand does the same thing at cheaper prices."

"Does not." he gave Crow a wary look.

"Oh then prove me wrong then? What are you spending the money on! Out with it!" Crow stepped forward. Jack had joined him so both were practically blocking any form of escape routes for Yusei.

"It's...IT'S FOR MY BATHROOM ITEMS OKAY!" he shouted louder than he typically did. He was blushing with embarrassment.

"What?" Jack and Crow stated at the same time.

"It's for my bathroom items." he muttered in defeat. "My shampoo, conditioner, and body soap." he counted on his fingers.

"Dude we have those things."

"Not the kind I use." he side glanced randomly. "The stuff I use...is well...fifty..." he squeeked the last part.


"Well...actually it's more like seventy if you want to get the actual price. Considering my soap is only available online for order." he smiled hestiantly.

"I demand to know what these products are!" Jack shouted. He just couldn't see the justification in spending so much for three mere bathroom items.

"Well, my shampoo and conditioner is a sulfate free teatree mint blend. And the body soap I get is also a minty blend but with apples too." he sheepishly replied.

"YOUR BUYING GIRL PRODUCTS!" Crow shouted as he dropped his notebook.

"Guys use them too." Yusei defended himself.


"Yes. I agree it's very girly." Jack added. Making Yusei give them a pitiful look.

"It is not! There's nothing wrong with wanting to have a pleasant scent after a bath!" he defended himself.

"By that aspect you can use more masculine products. Use the mighty man brand!" Jack added. "It's the products made specifically for men!"

"No way it smells horrible!" Yusei chided.

"Girl!" Crow pointed at him. "Men do not care for smelling like flowers and mints, they prefer manly smelling scents. You need to be more manly!"

"I don't want to be manly! I wanna be a feminine male that smells better!" he shouted. "I'm never using those so called man products you claim are so great, so deal with it!"

"Then atleast use a cheaper brand! Seventy a month is ridiculous!" Crow added.

"No! The products I use are quality products and I will not lower my bathing standards simply because of the price!"

"Your being unreasonable!" Jack put his hands on his hips.

"No your being unreasonable! I work hard for my money! I reserve the right to not smell like a horrible smelling man!"

"It is not a horrible smell it is the smell of great men!" Jack added.

"No way." Yusei gave them the cold shoulder. His bathroom products were on the line and he was not going to back down.

"Women love that manly smell! It turns them on!" Jack added with a light blush.

"Really." Yusei looked at him out of the corner of his eye. "Is that why your still single?"

"I have many girls!" Jack now defended himself.

"Only because your popular." Yusei waved a finger at him. "It has nothing to do with your so called man products. Trust me I know. I just thank whomever is out there that you haven't reduced yourself to axe." he shuddered.

"Hey I use axe! The body spray anyway...but I still use it!" Crow growled.

"I know. Most disgusting product ever!" he clenched his fists. "It's sweat in a can! I'll never use it even if you paid me!" he shook his head.

"Clearly Yusei, you are the girl in this house. Defending your products as if they were gold." Jack smirked. "I'm impressed, shall we go to the store to pick out a dress for you? What size bra are you? There's a sale at the clothing shops, we may be able to find your size."

"Ha, ha, very funny. Atleast when people stand next to me they don't gag." he put his hands on his hips and leaned over. "Unlike two guys I know, whom i've seen many a time make people run just by entering a room because they stunk."

"Oh one time! And I told you we fell in the sewer! That doesn't count!" Jack looked at him in anger.

"Really? Could of fooled me considering you didn't smell any different than you usually do." he crossed his arms.

"That's enough!" Crow picked up his notebook, then sighed. "Martha is gonna have a field day with this, she always told us to take what we can get ya know."

"Who do you think it was buying me my bathroom products up until a few months ago? She only stopped because I told her I could afford them on my own." he smirked at Crow and Jack. His smile grow when he saw their expressions go from anger and disappointment to shock. "Slammer." he stated with a snap of his fingers, turning on his heels and walking towards his room. He'd won, and he knew it.


"Martha!" Crow shouted to her on the phone. "I can't believe this! You were buying Yusei those expensive products the whole time? You made the rest of use ninety nine cent shampoos! Martha! That's so unfair!" he whined into the phone.

Martha laughed nervously, "Well it was rather fair considering Yusei helped out alot." came her voice over the phone. "He worked hard to earn even when he was younger. And besides you know how picky Yusei is when it comes to his baths. He'd complain to high horse and heaven that his hair felt horrible with the cheaper brands, it took me years to find something that he enjoyed."

"Martha!" he whined. "That's so unfair!"


Yusei was upstairs in the bathroom. Taking a cool refreshing shower after his endevor with his friends. He scrubbed at his scalp after putting in some of his sulfate free teatree mint shampoo, sighing contently as the scent filled his senses. "Hmmm.." he moaned in delight. No one was going to take away his only luxary. Yes it was expensive, but it was completely worth it.

Now if only he could have his own bathroom, he thought. Then he'd truly be in heaven.


Honestly this for the most part turned out as i'd hoped, but some did not, but i've been going through alot of stress over the past week because of a friend and frankly she's been bullying me (there's no other way to really say it tbh).

Just a bit of advice people, you don't have to take it but if your having this issue with someone just listen (well read...let's not get technical here).

If a friend is trying there best, and trying to compromise with you on somethings don't go around telling them how they should be doing it in a so called manner that you think is better. Everyone is different, and everyone has different opportunities. And consistently bullying and slamming down your friend when your angry at them for things that are more than likely minor isn't helping them and if anything your just making them feel like nothing they can do for you is good enough. This is how my friend is making me feel right now. I'm trying my best to pay her back with my low income job, and i've explained the situations that prevent me from doing so to her honestly, and she gave me this huge pm on how I need to change my lifestyle (if you guys knew me irl you'd know I don't really go out, and live off cheap cans of soup, especially now because i'm trying to pay her back) and manage my money better (My money really only goes to bills, and I have other friends that can atest to this, but this friend doesn't see this. I really don't make a whole lot of money to be honest. I have to scrimp and save for the stuff i'd like, want or need), even though i'm not buying myself anything until I pay her back. All i've done is bought a small amount of food and put gas in my car and pay my bills. And I almost have all the money I owe her, which by the end of this week I should have it. But she's been making me feel like by me working so hard i'm not doing enough to pay her back. I've even put double shifts in at work just to earn some more to make this faster. =

So yeah, if your friend is upsetting you over something similar, try to be more understanding please. It's one thing if the person is selfishly buying things and not caring that they need to pay you back. It's another when someone like me is working hard and going below even the bare minimums just to pay it back.

...I'm sorry, i've just been kinda down lately.

I hope you all enjoyed this fic though. As I was writing it I thought it'd make me feel better cause the thought to me was funny. But...eh maybe when i'm not so down i'll reread it and get a giggle.

Reviews and comments appreciated.