A/N: I'm sooooo late. Gosh. But whatevs. What will happen next? Well, I know but, like, you need to read. So as soon as I stop rambling on this pitiful excuse for an author's note we can get on with business… Anyway, on with the show, ma'am.

Consequences Are Never Fun Unless There's Kisses Involved

Bella was stirring against her chest again. She was snoring lightly, her lips slightly parted, and a tendril of slob was threatening to land on Alice's shirt. Bella had been mumbling some nonsensical words earlier in the hour, and turning over often enough to keep Alice out of a trancelike state. Alice's nose was buried in Bella's hair, taking colossal breaths of the apples and honey aroma. Hey, the human smelt fantastic, might as well take advantage of the time they had together. Alone. Although Alice feared the private time she spent with Bella would be interrupted soon enough. She still was visionless, and anything that happened now would be a surprise to even her. Bella let out a particularly long snort and rolled over so that her face was in Alice's lap, the drool effectively saturating her jeans. Alice grimaced. At least she could enjoy her time.

She could guess that the morning was passing quickly, and that the afternoon was steadily approaching. Someone was going to come out here, looking for the amazing vanishing human at some point, that, Alice was sure of. Either the little human wandered back first or the angry vampires found her first; what an encouraging reality.

Alice gazed down upon the slumbering female. Alice wrinkled up her nose. Dare she say it? Bella was… cute? Bella squirmed again as she thought this, and cuddled into Alice further. Ok, so maybe she was, with her cute little human nose, and cute little human breaths of oxygen… Too far! That was too much for Alice to really believe. Did she really think this stupid little girl was cute? Bullshit if she'd ever heard of it. No, no. She was just attracted to Bella that was it. She wanted to fuck her senseless and eat her after. She just… was distracted the last time. No worries. Although… Bella was rather cute…

It was like a rush of water upon Alice's head when she smelt the stench of Edward Cullen. Alice felt her mind snap into protection mode; Bella's safety could not be compromised. Alice shook Bella gently.

"Hey, hey. Bella. Wakey wakey." Bella groaned and turned over, mumbling something about lotion and deodorant. Alice smiled, despite the volatile situation. "C'mon. We don't want your boyfriend killing you and me. Let's goooooo." Bella's eyes fluttered open.

"Ah—Ah-lice?" Bella looked around, and settled her eyes on the window behind Alice. "Ed-Edward?"

Alice's head snapped to look out the window to see a fuming, and strangely black-eyed Edward glaring at her. In a quick movement, Alice pushed her and Bella out the driver's door. Edward growled and smashed the window pane Alice was next to just moments before.

"Bella, I'm sorry for this." Alice jerked Bella unto her shoulder and took off, supporting Bella the best she could while moving at such a high speed. Edward was just behind her.

"GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF HER!" Edward hissed.

"You're tryna hurt her!" Alice shouted back. Edward snarled and lunged at her feet, catching one, and caused Alice to stumble. Alice flipped onto her back, protecting Bella and used her other foot to kick Edward in his face. He shouted in pain while Alice placed Bella behind her, gently. If Eddie wanted to fight, he damn sure was gonna get one.

Edward scrambled to his feet as Alice charged at him. She knocked him in the teeth once, before following up with a swift left jab. Edward raised his arms in a block, and Alice took advantage of his exposed stomach. She threw a few punches into his abdomen, and once he revealed his face again, threw another punch to his face. Surprisingly, Edward caught her fist and head butted her in the face. Alice stumbled back in winced. Edward continued and gave her a vicious uppercut and dirty gut punch.

Alice wheezed and attempted to defend herself. Edward grabbed for her neck as she was reeling, and began to choke her out.

"EDWARD! Don't hurt her!" Edward's nostrils flared as Bella screamed.

"You love her now! You want me to spare her life when she was taking advantage of you?" Bella shook her head in the negative.

"It isn't like that! She was—"

"NO!" Edward stomped closer to Bella. Bella whimpered and attempted to scoot away from him. Tears were pouring down her face as she looked on in fear at Edward. Alice was writhing in his grip, feeling her neck plates wheeze in pain. She had to do something, and quick. Edward pushed Alice's tiny form into Bella's immediate vision. "LOOK AT HER! She wants to hurt you! She wants to drink your blood and kill you!" Bella's eyes gazed hopelessly into Alice's, tears streaming, crying for help.

Alice felt something build within her as she looked into Bella's sad eyes. Bella… was scared. And Edward was the threat. Alice smirked down at Bella, as she sunk her fangs into Edward's hand. Edward yelped and let go of Alice. Alice shouted as she lunged at Edward, managing to gain the upper hand on him. She began to assault his face without abandon, smashing and clawing at his eyes, and ripping and rending the flesh from his cheeks. He jolted and cried out as Alice continued, feeling her vicious nature come out.

"-Ice! Stop it! Stop it!" Alice whipped her head over to the screeching Bella and paused her movements for a second.

Suddenly Rosalie charged into Alice, knocking her clean off Edward, and limiting her with a well placed headlock. Emmett's battle cry followed soon after, subduing the pulverized Edward.

"What the Hell is goin' on here?" Emmett's eyes were wide while looking at Edward's severely fucked up face. "Alice… Did you do that?" Edward wriggled and hissed while Emmett cackled at his face. "Damn. Alice you fucked him all the way up."

"Emmett." Rosalie's scolding tone shut Emmett up as she released Alice.

Alice stood up quickly, moving in to comfort the crying Bella. She put her hands on Bella's shoulders, but Bella jerked away quickly.

"Y-you hurt him Alice! I l-l-love him!" Alice felt her train of thought smash into an imaginary tree as Bella's words echoed off her mind and into her consciousness. Bella loved Edward… and believed Alice was nothing more than a monster. Just a vicious, bloodthirsty monster. Alice hung her head, and sniffed for tears she knew she couldn't shed. She shouldn't—couldn't cry, tears or not in front of Bella. But she felt her chest ache with a pain unfamiliar as she turned away.

Alice walked away from Bella; her feet shuffling heavily against the foliage. Faintly, Alice could hear Emmett's calls to her, and she could still feel the sting of Rosalie's narrowed eyes on her. But what Alice could hear clearly, clearer than anything in the forest, was Bella's cries to Edward:

"I love you! I love you! Wake up!"

-z-z-z-z-z-z-z-zzz

Alice felt ill. Not the type of humanly ill with the sniffling and vomiting mess, but the kind of ill that affects the whole body. The ill that made you want to cry, or be secluded, or even kill passerby living creatures for the hell of it. At least, that was the type of ill Alice was experiencing.

Carlisle would probably chew her ass out for the mess of creatures collecting at the base of the large tree Alice was lying at, but she didn't care. Alice was upset, and killing was to depressed female vampires as chocolate was to depressed female humans. And God was Alice depressed. The one human she had truly thought was cute and worth time had gone and told her jackass of a brother that she had loved him. Loved him, him. Yeah, tell that ass licker that you love him when you spent the night in his sister's lap. So close to her…

Alice felt a twinge of arousal bud in her lower body. Looking back at the memory, she remembered how Bella's little pants of oxygen had tickled her sex ever so slightly…

"Oh God… Not in the forest Alice." Alice sat up immediately, to look at the smug Rosalie sauntering near her.

"What in the—what do you want? You wanna antagonize me about busting a hole in Edward's face, or bitch at me for masturbating in the empty woods?" Alice spat hostilely.

"Oh come on. Do you take me for a bastard that would kick you when you're down?" Rosalie smirked, hands raised in a defensive stance.

"Actually, yes." Alice stood up then, walking away.

"Hey, hey! Wait. I want to know what was going on between you and Bella-kins." Rosalie began to fall in step with Alice, much to her chagrin. It was not 'sister-sister' bonding time; it was 'leave-Alice-the-hell-alone' time.

"One, Bella is not a pudgy five year old, and two, none of your damn business." Rosalie smiled at that.

"Moo-oo-dy. I'm just saying, I know when I see a grown ass vampire kissing on a grown ass human." Alice's eyebrows shot up in shock at Rosalie then.

"How did you—"

"It was pretty obvious. The scent of secret kisses and lust is a dead giveaway." Rosalie's eyes narrowed then. "Humans are for killing."

"I know." Alice mumbled. Rosalie's eyebrows twitched and she stopped and turned to face Alice head on.

"They are inferior!"

"I know." Alice grunted, treading on.

"She is human, Alice! Human!"

"I know!" Alice finally stopped walking, shouting back at Rosalie. Her hands were fisted in frustration. "I know all of that. And I will kill her."

"You had better now that Edward is out for you. There is only one thing I hate more than humans, and it's Edward." Alice scoffed and looked out into the forest.

"You kill her then." Alice muttered.

"Ha. I have no reason to go around killing petty humans. I'm not the one walking around with wet panties for them." Rosalie cackled then, walking away from Alice and back toward the earlier chaos.

Alice shook her head. Rosalie was right. Her panties were soaked. And Bella had to die.