Wanna Be A Hardcore Nerdward Contest - Second Place Winner! Check out the banner - link on my profile!
Title: For Your Eyes Only
Summary: Edward is quite content with a meaningful life of physics and internet porn, but one day, his life is turned upside down when he finds himself tutoring the brown eyed beauty that he has been admiring from afar via her web cam.
Word Count: 9048
Disclaimer: Twilight is owned by Stephenie Meyer. I am only borrowing a few of her characters. The remainder of the story is my own. No reproduction is permitted without my written consent.
For Your Eyes Only
The teen pregnancy rate has dropped significantly since the early 1990's. Some people say it's because of better sex education in schools. Others say that it's due to an increased availability of reliable birth control options for teenagers. The religious conservatives will tell you that it's due to abstinence only education and the spread of good old conservative values.
Each of these may have a legitimate argument, but the theory I like best says that the reason we have far fewer teenage mothers is due to the one invention that has had the most dramatic impact on how we live our lives at the dawn of the 21st century: the internet.
Yes, the information superhighway has brought with it many benefits. You can get almost any question answered, listen to music with the click of a button, and send messages to friends halfway around the world in an instant. But to a hot blooded American male, the biggest benefit of all is the easy access to the bountiful, free porn.
Arthur C. Clarke once said that reading computer manuals without the hardware is as frustrating as reading sex manuals without the software. Clarke was a Science Fiction genius, but even he didn't fully anticipate the wonder that is the internet.
In reality the internet is both a blessing and a curse. I used to think it was a wonderful thing. For a guy like me, who desperately wants to satisfy the urge to copulate with a female member of the species, yet is too socially inept to hold a multiple word conversation with a woman, it's been a life saver.
Okay, I'm not totally inexperienced. There was this one girl, my study partner for thermodynamics sophomore year. She was a little shy like me, which was good. She didn't expect any small talk. Instead, we bonded over a shared fascination with the study of entropy. I was just about to insert my meter into her heat reservoir when my roommate, Jasper, barged in, ruining everything.
There was much screaming, scrambling and profuse apologizing, but the second she managed to get enough clothing to cover herself, she grabbed her books and ran. She wouldn't even look at me in class after that. So now, the only woman in the world who would appreciate the description of sex in thermodynamics terms has slipped through my fingers, and I have resigned myself to a solo study.
All my friends have tried to get me to talk to women in a social environment, but it always ends the same. I either can't get a word out because I have a brain freeze, or I delve so deeply into scientific jargon that they make up ridiculous excuses just to get away. Never fails.
All in all, I find internet porn to be a much better way of relieving my pent up energy. It's clean, disease free, low stress, and free of the embarrassment of buying a magazine at the news stand. Not to mention that magazines don't move like hi-resolution video. It's certainly not a perfect substitute for a real, living, breathing woman, but it's an acceptable one given my luck with the alternatives.
I have come to the conclusion that I am doomed to never have a relationship with a member of the opposite sex that doesn't involve a computer and a great deal of anonymity between us. So the teen pregnancy rate takes an imperceptible tick lower as there will be no offspring to inherit the old Cullen name and gene pool.
Over the years I've gotten to be quite a connoisseur of internet porn. I love the variety. You can imagine yourself with a different woman every night. Every guy's fantasy, right? Well, maybe it was mine until I found her: NaughtyGirl687.
She doesn't fit into the porn category at all. In fact, comparing her to porn is an incredible insult. She is a perfect, real woman, even if the only place I've ever seen her is on my computer screen. This woman lives nearby, probably within five hundred yards of my dorm. She's a student at my school, studying Biology or Pre-Med based on the classes she's taking, or at least the books she carries around. She is also happy, friendly, modest, and the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.
How do I know all these things if I've only ever seen her on my computer screen? Because NaughtyGirl's dorm room is the mirror image of mine, a design unique to the twin towers built here in the late 1980's, and in her dorm room she has a web cam that takes a snapshot every sixty seconds. It documents her life and broadcasts it for anyone to see.
Don't let the name fool you. She never does anything truly naughty in front of the camera. All her private activities are kept private, and the only skin she shows is still showing when she walks out the door. Most of the time she is in her room is spent studying, but if you are patient, you can catch her dancing to her i-pod. When she dances she is the most beautiful creature alive, so free and full of life. The camera shows only still shots, but my imagination is quite capable of filling in the movement, the swish of her hair as it flows around her shoulders, the sway of her hips to the beat of the music, the bounce of her soft, luscious, … but I digress.
The best part of the day is when she goes to bed at night. She always blows a kiss to the camera before turning off the light. For a whole sixty seconds I can gaze at her beautiful face and imagine that kiss is meant for me alone. Then I like to imagine all the naughty things she does when the lights go out.
Ever since I found her website, she has become the star of my fantasies. I imagine what it would be like to hear her laugh, to run my fingers over her soft skin. I desperately want to taste her lips. I imagine them to taste like sweet strawberries on a warm summer day. In fact, I want to run my tongue over every inch of her body, to commit it to memory like a laser scan.
But my deepest, darkest fantasies involve her lying naked in my bed as I pound into her, or kneeling in the shower with me, her lips wrapped around my firm cock. I used to feel a little guilty for fantasizing about her like that, but it never really stopped me from doing it again. After about ten amazing orgasms I just gave up and decided to enjoy it. It's not like I'll ever have to face her, anyway.
Today, it's the shower fantasy, since I am standing in the shower, stroking myself. I move my thumb over the head of my cock, imagining that it's her tongue, lapping up the drop of fluid to taste it. She places a soft kiss on the tip, before opening her lips and sliding it gently into her warm mouth. It feels heavenly as my cock absorbs the heat. She slowly slides it in, taking as much as she can. I gasp as her fingers reach up to cup my balls gently, stroking them in the same rhythm she is now using with her mouth. I twine my fingers into her hair, guiding her to move more quickly. Before I know it, I'm blowing my load all over the wall of the shower, but in my fantasy, she swallows every drop.
Bang! "Edward! What's taking you so long in there? Are you jacking off? I don't want to be late."
My roommate, Jasper, has no consideration for a man's private time. He is in a hurry to meet his girlfriend, Alice, at a party. I still can't figure out why he's dragging me along, but he insisted.
I finish my shower quickly and get dressed in a pair of jeans and a navy blue button down shirt. I try to comb my hair, and it mostly cooperates, but I know it will be a mess in an hour when it dries. I sigh in resignation and put on my glasses before heading out to face Jasper and his idea of a good time.
Jasper is waiting impatiently with a beer in his hand. He's wearing a black concert t-shirt. His hair looks like he didn't even bother to comb it, which I know isn't true. The problem with being roommates is that you always get to know a little too much about each other. I know that Jasper obsesses about his hair, and has an almost scientific protocol that he follows to get the right just-rolled-out-of-bed-after-a-night-of-hot-sex look. For some reason it works for him. Alice has her work cut out for her fending off all the attention he gets from other women, but she is up to the task.
"Dude, I swear, you take longer to get ready than a teenage girl on prom night." Jasper downed the last of his beer and chucked the bottle into the sink. "Let's go. Alice will be waiting."
"You didn't have to wait for me. I would have been fine here alone this evening."
Jasper gives me a look that says he knows exactly what I would be doing alone in the apartment. "Yeah, right. I'm surprised the keys don't stick together on that laptop yet. Come on. You know I'm determined to get your sorry ass laid at some point this year."
Since Jasper's monumental cockblocking episode, he has taken me on as some sort of charity case. His self-professed goal is to 'find me a girl who could fuck me into next year'. Apparently he thinks this is such a huge challenge that one hook up in a year is all I can manage, so he's determined to make it good.
Ah, who am I kidding? One is still infinitely more that I've gotten up until this point, good or bad. I grab my jacket and follow him out the door.
The party is the same as any other party Jasper has dragged me to. It's crowded with half drunk college students, each holding a cheap plastic cup filled with the cheapest beer you can buy. The band plays loud dance music while the alcohol fueled mating ritual begins. People flirt, dance, grind, kiss, all in an attempt to find the right person to hook up with for the evening.
"Jasper," squeals a high pitched voice. I'm amazed she can make herself heard above the noise in the room.
She thrusts a cup of beer into my hand so that she is free to jump into his arms and shove her tongue down his throat. I turn away from their PDA trying to find something else to amuse me, but the rest of the faces here appear to be strangers, until a hulking form cuts off my view of the rest of the room.
"Eddie, glad you could make it." Jasper's friend Emmett has always liked me, ever since I helped him get through freshman physics.
"It's Edward," I tell him for the thousandth time. It won't matter. Emmett only hears what he wants to hear.
At the sound of Emmett's voice Alice ends her assault on Jasper's lips and pulls her beer out of my hand just in time for Emmett to hand another to me.
"Hey, Em, killer party tonight!" Jasper says, now that his mouth was free to comment.
"Yeah, we've got quite the crowd. Looks like lots of fresh meat!" Emmett replies. I know he isn't serious about the last bit. Emmett is completely pussy whipped by his girlfriend, Rose. "Maybe we can even hook Eddie up for a change."
"Don't worry about me, I can take care of myself," I bluff. I hoped they can't see the blood rush to my face in the swirling lights. I hate being the center of anyone's attention. Being the center of Emmett's attention is certain to bring mortification, especially now that he has taken up the crusade to get me laid.
Emmett throws his massive arm around my shoulder. Honestly, I don't know how he manages to stay upright lugging two of them around.
"Eddie, we know you need all the help you can get, and me and Jasper, we're here to help." He claps me on the back so hard my knees nearly buckle.
"Oh, hey, speaking of help, my friend, Izzy, is just about flunking Calc. Do you think you could work your magic again?"
I am quick to agree to anything that distracts Emmett from my sex life or lack thereof.
"Yeah, sure. You know where I study. Just send him out. I'll be there from eight to about midnight."
I had finagled a key to one of the classrooms in the Walker building. I like to have a board to draw on when I'm working on a problem. This particular room has a smart board that I can hook up to my laptop. I can think and draw to my heart's content and without having to worry about transcribing it all later.
Emmett snorts at my comment. "Great. Izzy should be around here somewhere. I'll introduce you if I get the chance." Thankfully, before he can resume his prior topic his attention is drawn to the dance floor by his girlfriend, Rose.
"Hey, I'd love to waste away the evening with you fuckers, but my Hot Mama is missing me. Later dudes," and he's off.
Jasper and Alice down their beers and follow him out to the dance floor. Alice tries to pull me along, but I manage to duck behind some large drunk guy to evade her grasp. I figure I can look like a fucking idiot standing alone on the dance floor, or a pathetic loser standing alone against the wall. I choose pathetic loser.
I want no part of the meat market taking place before me. It is a crowd I will never belong to. I just don't have it in me. I can't put myself out there, flirt, rub my body against some nameless girl in the hopes of getting her to follow me back to my place at the end of the night for meaningless sex. Well, the meaningless sex part doesn't sound too bad, but it doesn't make my brain and body any more capable of the lead-up activities.
The night wears on, and finally, I decide that I've stood here long enough that Jasper can't give me too hard a time for taking off. Just as I turn to leave, I see a swish of long brown hair. I know that hair. I've imagined how it would swirl and flow over her body as she danced. It was my NaughtyGirl.
The camera doesn't do her justice. It can't pick up the rich brown tones, or the shine of the reflected lights as she sways. She is a vision of beauty, and sex, and innocence all rolled into one.
The room is crowded, and I feel myself pulled forward to the edge of the dance floor to get a better view. She is all I have imagined and more. She's wearing a pair of skinny jeans with a loose fitting red halter top, held in place by a tiny strap that tied behind her neck. It's the kind of thing that would have fueled a week's worth of fantasies if I had been home alone watching snapshots from her web cam as she walked out the door. This is so much better. I find myself hoping that some rude fucker pulls the string letting it fall to show the prizes beneath.
At least until I see Mike Newton, my chem lab partner, staring open mouthed at her. (And here I always thought Mike was gay.) No, exposing those beautiful boobs to the world like some slut on a 'Girls Gone Wild' video would be a travesty. I can live with never seeing them, so long as it keeps them out of the eyes of the other horny fuckers in the room.
A large hand reaches for her waist and pulls her back. I want to reach out and rip the bastard's arm off, but when I see whose it is, I am floored. Emmett grinds playfully against her, with Rose rubbing herself on him from behind. After a minute or two the song ends and the three of them break apart only to exchange hugs. Emmett knows her!
With my brain still frozen in that thought my feet somehow develop a mind of their own. They propel me out of the room, up the stairs and out the front door.
The cool air hits my face, freeing my mind to function again. Emmett knows her! He could introduce us! As suddenly as the thought comes to me it is followed by a shot of dread. What would I say to her? 'Hello, you don't know me, but I've been stalking you for months through your web cam.' Yeah, might want to re-think that.
I go through one scenario after another in my head, but each one ends the same way as the last. She either laughs in my face, turns and walks away, or slaps with all the strength her little arm can muster, but regardless, in the end I am humiliated and alone. I know I can't face that. Better to just continue worshipping her from afar. At least that way I can continue to dream about what might have been.
One beer isn't enough to even give me a buzz, but I feel drunk as I stumble back to my dorm. Once I finally fall asleep, I dream of pulling that little red string behind her neck.
It's been three days since the party. All weekend, I've resisted opening her web cam page. The perfect fantasy has been changed into a distinct reality. Suddenly, meeting her is within the realm of possibility. The prospect is at once enticing and terrifying. I just don't think I'm willing to take the risk of rejection. I'm a coward.
I need to put her out of my mind and concentrate on my studies. Even without the web cam, I've gotten nothing done all weekend because my head has been filled with visions of NaughtyGirl dancing. If I'm not careful my GPA is going to suffer.
Tonight, I am back in my normal room in the Walker building. I'm finding the setting marginally more conducive to studying. I mean, you can't exactly stop for a wank when you're in a public building. Well I suppose you could, but I don't dare go there.
I'm halfway through the solution to a particularly complex differential equation when the door opens. In pops just a head with long, brown, wet hair tied back in a ponytail and pair of thick glasses. My first thought is that I've never seen a floating head before. My second thought is that it looks strangely familiar. She scans the room. Her eyes go wide when she finally finds me standing up front next to the board.
Neither of us says a word for a few seconds. Her eyes look me up and down, probably evaluating whether she even wants to bother speaking to me. Finally she speaks up.
"Eddie? Eddie Cullen?" Her voice is like music. It sends a tingle down my spine. I realize I'm being impolite.
"Y-yea?" I stammer out.
"Oh, good. I'm in the right place."
She barges right into my classroom and makes herself at home, chattering away the whole time. I miss most of what she says because my brain is too busy processing the body attached to the head.
She is wearing sneakers without socks. Her body is covered by baggy sweatpants and a sweat shirt with the words 'Swim Team' across the back. Well, that explains the wet hair and glasses. She must have just come from practice. There is something strangely familiar about her but I can't put my finger on it. What I do know is that she is hot. Under the baggy clothes and wet hair lies a body that is just smoking.
Finally she mentions Emmett's name, and her words begin to register on my brain.
"I'm so glad you offered to help me with my calc. If I don't maintain my grades, I could lose my swimming scholarship. Emmett said he was going to introduce us at the party on Friday night, but he couldn't find you. You must have left early. I'm Bella, by the way, though Emmett probably called me Izzy. I've told him a million times that it's Bella, but he never listens."
Emmett? The party? Finally it all clicks into place. This woman standing before me with wet hair and baggy sweatpants is none other than my NaughtyGirl. How did I not see it? It took another moment for me to make the connection between NaughtyGirl and Emmett's friend, Izzy, who needs help with calc.
"Eddie? Is something wrong?"
Wrong? What could be wrong? I suddenly realize that she has her books out and is waiting for me to do my thing, all while I stare at her like a fucking douche. It's a wonder I'm not drooling or something.
I wipe the corner of my mouth on reflex before spouting out, "Edward!"
She jumps a little at the volume of my voice, and I silently curse myself.
"Sorry," I say in a more normal tone. "It's Edward, not Eddie. Emmett always, well, you know."
A look of understanding crosses her face. "Okay, Edward it is."
When I don't respond further, a trace of worry creeps into her expression. "Edward, is this all right? Emmett said that you agreed to tutor me, but I know how he is, and well, if you're too busy…"
"No!" I shout again, panicked that she is thinking of leaving already. I really need a volume control. "I mean, this is fine. I told Emmett to send you here when I talked to him at the party." Wow, I managed a complete sentence. I give myself a mental fist bump, but then, does it really count if you're only fist bumping yourself?
"Great," she says, looking relieved. "I really need help, and I don't want to drop this class." She gives me a huge smile.
As she looks at me from her seat, I notice her eyes flicker up and down my body. I look down at myself, taking in the baggy jeans, and plaid button shirt. Wonderful. I might as well be wearing my 'Geek Squad' pocket protector. If first impressions mean anything, she'll never see me as anything except a walking, talking, calculus tutoring human computer.
I drop my eyes to the floor resigned to my fate.
"So where do you want to start?"
We delve into her calculus homework, and I find that by concentrating on the problems on the board, I can actually string complete sentences together. This works as long as I'm doing the drawing. The minute she takes my place, my ability for higher thinking trickles away and I'm left with the brain of a Neanderthal looking to mate. I have to close my eyes to the sight if I'm going to have any hope of getting her through this.
After two hours and much struggle to concentrate on my part, NaughtyGirl, I mean Bella, is starting to understand basic derivatives. When she starts making elementary multiplication mistakes, I decide that she is mentally exhausted and suggest we pick it back up again tomorrow.
She looks completely worn out as she packs up her books, but I can tell that she is happy with herself.
Before she walks out the door, she pauses at my side. This is the closest I've been to her. I can feel the heat radiating off of her. For the last two hours I've somehow managed to focus on the math, but now, it's biological principles that are running through my mind, particularly the one governing blood flow in a human male standing next to the sexiest woman he can imagine.
"Edward, thank you so much. I don't know what I would have done without you."
Before I can move, she reaches up and plants a soft kiss on my cheek. We are only connected for an instant, but the energy transferred would peg my amp meter.
I take a sharp breath, but am once again completely unable to form words. Her brow furrows at my reaction.
"I'll see you again tomorrow?" she asks.
I nod. It's the only response I am capable of.
Once she is gone, I feel like I can breathe again. Studying is definitely out, though.
It's late, so I pack up my things and head back to my dorm. My head is filled with NaughtyGirl. Seeing her there tonight, in the flesh, was like a hot fantasy come true. Even with the sweats and glasses, she was hot. If anything they made her seem more real, like a girl I could actually learn to talk to.
I take a shower before bed, and for my nightly wank I have a fantasy of NaughtyGirl in the swimming pool. I'm swimming laps, and when I stop to take a break I feel the most amazing warmth spread over my cock. She's under the water, like a mermaid, sucking me off. I watch as her hair swirls around her head in the water, and revel in the pornographic pleasure that is her lips on my cock. It only takes a minute before I come.
Finally relaxed and lying in bed, the last thought that crosses my mind is to wonder why I never saw her dressed like that, wet hair and sweats, before.
The next night I am back in my study room, only this time Newton, my asshat of a lab partner, is there with me. We're finishing up a lab write up that needs to be submitted jointly. The problem is that Newton and I don't agree on the results. Sometimes I think he likes to argue just to see me blow my top. Usually, I enjoy proving to him what an idiot he is, but tonight I'm in a hurry to get rid of him before Naughty, I mean Bella, walks in. Finally I push him out the door, telling him I'll finish it later. To my relief, he takes me up on the offer and leaves.
It turns out that there was no need to hurry. She's late. I spend the time flipping through my old calc book, trying to decide what I want to teach her tonight. Just as I am about to give up, she bursts through the door.
She's out of breath, but she looks amazing. She's wearing a pair of tiny little red slippers, a black miniskirt, and a low cut little red shirt. I try not to stare as she gets settled, but my eyes are drawn to the V, and to the two soft mounds sitting plumply beneath it.
"Sorry I'm late. Had to take care of a few things earlier," she says while trying to catch her breath.
I don't say anything. The sight of her breathing heavy takes me back to another fantasy.
Where is the girl in glasses and sweats from yesterday? The one I was learning to talk to? I feel myself start to panic at the thought of being close to this vision of sexiness all evening.
I'm already hard, but before I lose control, I turn around to the board. It's easier to talk if I don't see her in all her perfection.
I decide to jump right into the lesson. "I thought we could review what we covered yesterday, and then get into some more difficult problems, if that's okay."
She hesitates before she answers, and her voice sounds flatter than it did when she first walked in. "Yeah, that's fine," she says.
I scribble some sample problems on the board and hand the marker to her. Instead of grasping the tip that I present to her, she slides her fingers up the back of my hand before pulling it from my grasp.
Just that simple touch has my mind spiraling out of control again. I struggle to think of something, anything to calm myself. I scroll through lists of scientific principles, chemical reactions, and finally settle on Newton. Yes, Newton naked while setting up a chemistry experiment. That's enough to turn anyone off.
We work through the assignment, and I add some new and more complex problems for her to solve. She is stumped at first, but we talk through it and she begins to understand.
At the end of the night, she pulls me into a tight hug, and plants another kiss on my cheek. Somehow, I think I make it back to my dorm without my feet ever touching the ground.
Before I know it, we've worked ourselves into a routine. She doesn't come every night, but I see her at least two or three times a week.
Her personality is as bubbly as ever. She asks me all kinds of questions about my classes, my major, how I know Emmett. It's hard at first to give more than one word answers. Sometimes if I close my eyes, I can concentrate and give her a straight answer.
Each night I see her, she seems to be wearing something even more revealing than the last. I can't help wishing she would show up again straight from swimming practice in the glasses and sweats. The sexy clothes give me plenty of masturbation material, but they also make me think she is rushing off to meet a guy after she leaves me. I always end up tongue-tied trying to talk to her with my brain full of horny/jealous thoughts.
The best part of the night is still the end. She always kisses my cheek before she walks out the door. I so want to wrap my arms around her, but my brain always freezes.
Sometimes, I see a look of disappointment in her eyes as she goes, but since she is coming along well with her calc studies I don't know what more she wants.
Tonight, Newton is here again, working on another joint assignment. We've gone over it a thousand times. It's ready to turn in, but the obnoxious prick just won't leave. Finally, I manage to kick him out the door with about ten minutes to spare.
I breathe a sigh of relief, and my mind is free to wander to thoughts of Bella. I wonder what she'll be wearing today. As the season has gotten cooler, her outfits have covered more of her body, but they haven't made her any less tempting. Last time, she wore this tight sweater that looked like it had been poured over her body to match the soft curves of her breasts.
And just that quickly, I'm hard as a rock again.
I decide to head out to the men's room to see if I can take care of business quickly before she arrives. My aversion to getting off in public restrooms has fallen by the wayside during the past few weeks. It makes it much easier to concentrate in her presence.
Just as I approach the door, she blows into the room like a whirlwind, slamming into my body unexpectedly. I grasp her to me tightly, the only alternative being to let her fall to the ground.
She gasps and looks up into my eyes with an expression of shock far beyond what I expected to see. That's when I realize that she can feel probably feel every inch of the steel hard rod in my pants.
"Shit. Sorry, Bella." Immediately I push myself away from her. I'm sure my face is beet red. I quickly walk away and begin to erase the board. Bella stands there for a moment and then sets her bag down and begins to unpack it. I'm sure she must think that I'm some kind of animal, rubbing myself up against her like that.
As if the situation couldn't get any more awkward, Newton comes barreling back in. "Oh, Edward, I almost forgot…" He pauses when he sees that I'm not alone. A knowing look spreads across on his face.
"I cancelled my study session for tomorrow, so you and I can pick up here right where we left off," he says suggestively. He takes a final glance at Bella, wiggles his eyebrows at me and says, "I'll see you tomorrow, you hot stud," and disappears out the door.
Bella stares at the space his worthless ass just occupied. Her eyes move to me, back to the space, and back again to my still hard crotch. Her lips form an 'O' as her brain finishes processing the scene that has just taken place.
"Edward, I'm so sorry." Frantically she begins throwing items back in her bag. "For weeks I've been coming here, practically throwing myself at you, always wondering why you never made a move. You're gay."
"Bella, no!" I try to explain, but she cuts me off.
"I really should have known. It figures, I finally find a guy who's smart, and hot, and don't even get me started on those sexy nerd glasses! I do everything I can possibly think of to get you to make a move, but you never do. It's so obvious now."
She zips her bag and throws it over her shoulder.
"Don't worry, I won't tell Emmett or anyone else that you're gay. I understand, and I'll just leave you alone." She walks quickly back to the door but pauses at the threshold to look back at me. "For what it's worth, you are a great calc teacher."
"Bella!" I yell, but she's already gone.
"Fuck!" I fling my stack of books across the room in frustration. Only Newton could ruin everything just by opening his god-damn mouth.
Then it really starts to sink in. She wanted me. Practically threw herself at me, she said. I had the girl of my dreams right here, and now she's gone for good. That instant of having her whole body pressed up against mine had been so incredible. I can still feel her soft chest pressed up to mine, my cock growing harder from the unexpected friction of another body. It's like getting a hit of a powerful drug, and then being told you can never have it again.
I want to rage and scream, but it isn't in my nature. Instead, I slowly begin picking up my books to return home. There is no way I can get any more studying done tonight.
Lying next to my Physics book is a calculator that clearly isn't mine. I pull the cover off, and inside is written, 'Bella Swan, 304 Henderson'. Shit. She is going to need this tomorrow. I have to get it back to her, but I can't ask Emmett or Jasper to return it. That would lead to too many awkward questions. I have to take it back myself.
The whole way to her dorm, I try to figure out what I will say to her. How can I possibly explain?
Facing her door, I almost chicken out. Maybe I can tell one of her friends I found it and have them give it to her.
No. If I don't at least try to explain, I will be scarred for life by my own cowardice.
Just as I'm about to knock, the door flies open. There stands my NaughtyGirl, toothbrush in hand.
"Edward!" By her expression I can tell that I am the last person she expected to see.
"You…" My brain starts to freeze up just at the sight of her. I close my eyes and force the words to come out. "You forgot your calculator."
"Oh," she says. She backs up into her room setting her toothbrush down. I follow her in, not wanting to risk getting the door slammed into my face.
"You really didn't need to bring it out tonight. I could have gotten it tomorrow." She won't look at me. She's still embarrassed by our earlier exchange.
"It's no trouble. Besides, I needed to set the record straight."
I take a deep breath.
"Bella, I know what that looked like, but I'm not gay. You have to believe me."
"But, that guy,"
"Newton, my asshat of a lab partner? He might be gay but I am definitely not. I'm just doomed."
I bang my head against her door.
"The perfect girl is coming on to me but I'm so socially inept that I must still be putting out gay vibes!"
She grabs me by the arm to pull me back from the wall with a frightened look on her face. "Doomed?"
I'm unable to contain my thoughts any longer. Normally they would stay locked in my brain until I chose the precious few that were worthy of speaking, but I've hit my breaking point. My verbal filter is shattered, and the words just tumble out.
"Yes, doomed. I've got the hottest, most beautiful girl in the world right here in front of me. A real, non-electronic, flesh and blood girl, and what do I do? I somehow convince her I'm gay."
I've turned my back to her, now banging my head repeatedly on her door. I can't bear to look into her eyes.
"You have no idea how long I've wanted you! I've seen your webcam you know." She gasped softly behind me. "I love watching you just go about your day. You never do anything immodest, never show a hint of skin that you aren't about to show the world once you walk out the door. So many times I've imagined what it would be like to go back to your room with you, to take you to your bed just off camera, to touch you, hold you, kiss you. I've envisioned what it would look like to see you with your lips wrapped around my …"
I somehow manage to stop before I say something that will make her kick me out.
"And you let me get close to you! You came to me for help. You let me touch your hand, breathe your scent. You kissed me."
"I just kissed your cheek."
At the sound of her voice I finally turn back to look at her.
"Isabella, each of your kisses could last me a lifetime. They should, but instead they just make me want you more. Each one is a drug, and I feel like an addict who could never get enough. But somehow, instead of conveying just how I feel about you, the signals I do manage to send tell you I'm not interested. That's why I'm doomed! I'm destined for the rest of my life to have my most significant relationship with my hand and a computer screen."
I drop my head and resume banging it on the door again. I can't stand the look in her eyes.
"So now that I've set the record straight, and instead of thinking I'm gay you now think I'm a crazy stalker, I'll just leave you alone."
"Edward, look at me." I close my eyes tighter.
"Edward?" Suddenly, she's right behind me. I didn't even hear her move. She pulls me from the door and takes my hands in hers, placing them on her waist. I feel a surge of energy unlike any I've felt before. I've never had my hands on a woman like this. I open my eyes to look at her and take a step back to put some distance between us, but my back hits the wall.
Placing her hands on my shoulders, she says, "Don't move. I just want to try something." The look of pity is gone from her face. I can't read anything buy determination in her expression. My heart pounds in my chest as she slowly moves closer. I hold my breath as she tilts her head back and reaches up to place a gentle kiss on my lips. She only lingers for a moment, but in that short time, I revel in the soft caress she places there. I didn't know how to respond, but when she starts to pull away I can't help but follow her trying to keep that connection for just a second longer.
She looks up at me, measuring my response. All I can think is 'Do it again! Please, do it again!'
She must be satisfied with whatever she sees in my eyes because she pulls herself back up and, closing her eyes this time, presses her lips firmly to mine.
I pull her tightly to me and feel her smile in response. Her lips begin to move, placing small kisses on mine. Then, I feel her tongue slide gently across my bottom lip. Instinctively, my mouth opens to her. As my tongue tentatively touches hers, I feel a jolt of energy ripple through my body. Before I know it, I'm locked in the most passionate kiss I have ever imagined with this beautiful woman in my arms.
Her lips move frantically over mine, pouring out several weeks' worth of pent up frustration and need. To my amazement, I respond without thinking. It's as if some dormant part of my brain had been closed away and Bella's kiss is the key to unlock it. When it is finally unleashed it responds with the same passion and intensity that she displays.
It's almost too strong. I want to run my hands down her chest, to squeeze the soft mounds that are pressed so enticingly to my chest. It's so difficult to resist the urge to grind my hard cock into her thigh.
With a gasp I break off the kiss and take several deep breaths as she continues to place kisses down my jaw and neck. It feels heavenly, but as oxygen returns to my brain, so does a minimal ability for rational thinking. My first thought is that internet porn and self stimulation don't hold a candle to this. Neither does my one brief encounter from a year earlier. Thank God my verbal filter seems to have switched back on, because I manage to wipe both of these thoughts away before I give voice to them.
Fear is the next thing to return. Just kissing her like this is better than my most dirty fantasy. Now a whole new world has opened up to me, and I want that physical link with her more than anything. The thought of losing it if I screw this up scares the shit out of me.
"Bella," I pant.
She pulls back slightly to look at me again.
"Baby, you are so incredible, but you have to understand, I've never …"
"Never what?" she asks with mischief in her eyes. "Never kissed a woman? I don't believe that for a second."
"Well, n…n…no. I have done that before."
"And have you been touched by a woman?"
I was speechless as her hands slid down my chest leaving a burning path in their wake. Her left snuck around to squeeze my ass while her right moved down to palm my rock hard erection.
"Naughty, I mean Bella," I spat out, surprised at the contact. Shit! I can't screw up like that when she has her hands on my junk.
"Naughty? I'll show you naughty," Bella said slyly.
Before I can protest Bella is on her knees in front of me popping open the buttons on my fly. Little Edward springs forth, and by this time he's grown into a monster.
"If I had known you were packing this away in here, I would have been on you that first day we met."
Bella looks up at me as if to check if I'm okay. Better than that, I am ecstatic.
Carefully she wraps her fingers around me and pumps, and I realize just how inadequate my own hand is.
I lean back against the door with my eyes closed, just reveling in the feeling of her touch. I think it can't get any better until I feel something warm and soft glide over the tip.
My eyes spring open and look down onto the most amazing sight. Her hand has stopped moving, and she is tracing around the tip with her tongue. I almost come at the sight alone.
"Oh, NaughtyGirl," I moan out before I can stop myself.
This seems to excite her, because she wraps her lips around me and takes in as much as she can. I have to fight the natural urge to thrust my hips.
After sucking it in and out a few times, she pulls her mouth off. I whimper at the loss of contact, but she doesn't stop there. She runs her tongue from the bottom to the top, taking a moment to swirl it in the tip before pulling the whole thing back into her mouth.
"Naughty, I mean Bella!" Shit! Why can't I get that right? Maybe because my dream girl is sucking me off and the blood flow to my brain is seriously diminished.
Naughty Bella pulls her mouth off with a pop, but continues stroking with her hand. She looks up with amusement. "It's okay. You can call me Naughty."
She moves her mouth back to me, but places her hands on my hips, pulling me into the depths of her mouth. She can't quite deep throat me, but takes in as much as she can.
Before I know it, my hands are tangled into her hair and I'm fucking her mouth. It takes my last remaining ounce of strength to stop myself from thrusting too deep.
I thrust again and again. I want to make this last forever, but I can feel that tingling that says I'm about to come.
"Bella, I'm…" I feel the buildup coming from deep inside me. Bella can sense it too, and pulls her mouth off of me but keeps stroking. She tilts her beautiful face up to look at me, and I'm done for.
"Oh, Bella," I moan as the release ripples through me. She slowly pumps three more times until the final drop seeps out.
I can barely stand. Never have I had such an intense experience. I know in that moment that I will never look at porn the same way again. It pales in comparison to this.
I'm so out of breath that I can barely open my eyes. Bella pulls a tissue out from somewhere and wipes her hand. Then she cleans me and sheepishly tucks me back inside my pants.
I drop to my knees next to her and pull her head up so that her eyes meet mine.
"Are you okay?" I ask.
Bella has her eyes cast down. She just gave me what has to be the most amazing blowjob of my entire life, and now she's acting shy?
"You know you didn't need to do that."
"Oh, I thought you liked it." She tries to pull away, but I don't let her. I need to make her understand that she means more to me than a quick blowjob.
"Bella, I don't want to sound ungrateful, because honestly, that was the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me, but you didn't need to do that. I would have been thrilled just to kiss you."
I pull her lips to mine to prove the point. She stiffens for a moment, but then I can feel her relax and return my affection.
After a moment she pulls away and looks up with a content smile on her face.
"Don't worry, Edward. I wouldn't have done it if I didn't want to. It's just that I've had this crush on you ever since that first day I met you."
She leans into me and rests her head on my shoulder. I think she's avoiding my eyes again.
"Just don't think that anyone else gets this treatment. I don't make a habit of inviting men to my room for…, well, for this."
"Bella, I would never think that of you. Besides, I've never seen…"
Suddenly my eyes dart to that little black lens pointed right at us. All the blood rushes from my head.
"Shit! Bella, the web cam!"
"Oh!" She jumps up and runs to the computer.
I see it spring to life as soon as she touches the mouse. She makes a few quick keystrokes, and then turns back to me.
"It's okay, Edward. I keep it on a fifteen minute delay. I don't think anyone saw anything. I switched it to send a blank wall shot for now."
"Thank God!" What do you know? She may not be much for calculus, but my girl knows her way around a computer.
And now I'm getting hard again.
"Yeah, I use it just in case I step in front of it naked or something. It also comes in handy for when I look like a drowned rat after I get back from swimming practice."
I pull her into my arms again.
"Hey! You don't look like a drowned rat. You were so beautiful and sexy that night I could barely add two numbers together."
"You're sweet." She says sarcastically.
"I mean it, Bella. Much as I appreciate the miniskirts and tight sweaters, that night you just seemed approachable. Like someone I could figure out how to get to know."
Her pout melts into a beautiful little smile.
"There's nothing to figure out. Let's just sit and talk."
She pulls me over to the bed where we do just that. We talk for hours. Eventually we find ourselves laying down, squeezed together in a tangle of arms and legs. We don't do anything else, except for maybe a few more stolen kisses. It is truly the most incredible night of my life.
I startle when I wake up the next morning. There is a giant poster of that sparkly dude from those vampire movies staring down at me from across the room. That's when I realize I'm not alone. The most beautiful girl in the world is wrapped in my arms.
I glance at my watch and realize that if I don't get up in the next few minutes, I will be late for class.
She's sleeping like an angel. I hate to wake her, but I don't want her to think I just used her and left.
"Bella?" I nudge her softly.
"Hmmm," she mumbles.
"Bella, I need to get to class." I shake her shoulder a little. I would love to lie here with her all day, but I have an assignment to hand in.
"Too comfy to move," she mumbles a little more coherently.
"Baby, believe me. I would love to stay here all day, but it really is important."
"Okay." She finally sits up and rolls out of bed.
We're still both fully clothed, so there isn't much to do. As I stand up, she runs her fingers through my hair.
"Edward, you've got the most gorgeous sex hair."
"More like bed head," I joke. I've always been annoyed with my unruly hair.
"Jasper's definitely going to think you got some when you show up looking like this."
"He can think what he wants. My lips are sealed."
She pulls me down for one last kiss before I go.
"Bella, can I see you again tonight? I mean, not like this. I'd like to take you on a proper date."
"I'd love to," she says with a smile.
I place one last peck on her lips before I tear myself away.
Once again I walk back to my dorm room in a daze.
I open my door to find Jasper staring at himself in his mirror yet again.
"Hey, man, pull another all nighter?" he asks.
"No, not quite," I reply. I can't hide the smirk on my face. I would make a terrible actor.
My avoidance of his question causes Jasper to look back at me. His eyes widen in surprise.
"I know that look."
"What look?" I drop my bag on my desk, and start pulling a fresh set of clothes from my dresser.
"The sexed up walk of pride look. Please tell me you are no longer a virgin."
I pause as if in thought. "How do you define virgin exactly."
Jasper rolls his eyes. "Have you ever had your dick in a woman's vagina? If so, then you are no longer a virgin."
"Well then, by that definition… definitely still a virgin." I laugh to myself at the frustration on his face. I decide to throw him a bone.
"I do, however, have a date tonight with the lovely Miss Swan."
"Swan? The hot brunette? Emmett's friend?"
I nod in reply, and Jasper gives a low whistle.
"I didn't think you had it in you. Wow, Alice is going to have a field day with this bit of information."
"Look," I say turning serious again. "She is the best thing that's ever happened to me. For once, things are going right. Don't try to pressure us into something we're not ready for."
"Okay. I guess I owe you that much," he said reluctantly. "I won't be able to keep it from Alice, but I'll try to keep her interference to a minimum."
I showered and changed quickly. Before long I found myself walking to class with a spring in my step. I had an unbelievable time last night, with the promise of a date tonight with the most amazing girl on campus.
The buzzing of my cell phone interrupted my morning daydream with a picture message.
The caption said, "For Your Eyes Only!"
I opened it up to find a perfect picture of myself standing in Bella's room, with her on her knees in front of me as she kissed the head of my cock.
"Oh, Naughty Girl! What did I do to deserve you?"
I've always had a thing for guys with brains and nerdy glasses, in fact I married one.
The plot itself was inspired by a story I had read over ten years ago about a girl who had a web cam in her dorm room recording every aspect of her life, unedited. I can't help but think this is a little dangerous, and strongly recommend you think something like this through before you do it.
Guys like Edward are one in a million. Please think twice (or maybe three or four times) before engaging in sexting with someone no matter how close you are.
If you like my writing, check out my story, Lost Soul. It's about one third complete. Chapter 9 will be posted in a few days.
So to recap – No sexting, but reviews are always a great substitute.