I hate stupid animals.

So of course when I saw Potter's new kitten I wanted to Avada Kadavra's its scrawny ass for daring to even attempt sneaking up on my owl. Naturally my owl scared the dumbass off but there's a certain obligation that Potter is meant to go through that he hasn't done yet. I don't usually hold commoners to the social obligations I have memorized since a small child but this is different.

Potter needs to apologize.

I walked over to the Gryffindor table and nodded politely to Mudblood and Weasel before narrowing my eyes at Potter. He took a bite of his toast and a sip of his pumpkin juice before motioning for me to speak, which is incredibly rude of him. "Your cat attempted to assault my owl." I informed him in a slight drawl causing Potter to laugh loudly. It didn't seem like he was going to ever stop and then... he stopped breathing he was laughing so hard. I drew my eyebrows up in mild surprise but Mudblood and Weasel just rolled their eyes.

"Just get rid of the ruddy thing." Weasel grumbled while Mudblood pressed her lips tightly together. She wasn't going to voice her opinion this time. When Potter finally began to breathe once more he just looked at me expectantly. It was as though he expected me to agree with him or something. But this is about my owl not his own personal issues when I have my own I'm dealing with.

"It was cute, right?" He asked with a smirk making my eyes widen as I stared at him in disbelief. His kitten could have harmed my owl! The cat's nails were long and sharp and he was being a fucking idiot! What the bloody hell does Potter think he's playing at. Sure his kitten is tiny and stupid and tends to fall over in the oddest positions but that's beside the point! Why does he insist on changing the conversation and making it about different things all together when we were already discussing something else that is much more important.

"Harry... just give it a rest will you?" Weasel groaned as Mudblood tried to start a conversation with Neville. It appears as though this issue has been going on for quite a while. I smirked lightly at that and began to play with a feather in my pocket. It's one of my owl's feathers that were shed in his fight against the stupid kitten. A war trinket, one could say.

"Yes but that's beside the point." I interrupted causing him and his little lackeys to look at me in shock. Apparently my agreeing with him wasn't expected from anyone... including myself.

"How is it beside the point?" He demanded looking outraged. And of course Potter ignores that completely and brings the conversation back to what he believes we should be talking about rather than the abuse that's happening to my owl. Glaring I tried to control my rising temper as his own eyes looked at me with such fiery rage that I felt like slapping him.

"You're bloody cat could have injured my owl!" I shouted angrily.

"Yeah but my cat is the cutest thing since kittens!" He cried making me smirk.

"You're an idiot. Your cat is a kitten." I informed him smugly making Potter's face turn a brilliant shade of red. Obviously common sense is a trait that not many Gryffindors possess.

"Fine. Whatever. You win." He grumbled but it was obvious the hero lost his heart in the fight.

"Was that muggle slang? The whole kitten thing?" I asked suddenly curious making him nod.

"Yeah I heard it a couple years ago." He agreed making me smile but then scowl. Apparently he's making me forget my place...

"Your cat still could have injured my owl."

"Fine I'll give you a fucking blowjob every time he tries."

"You have yourself a deal."

Stupid animals can be alright... if their masters are sexy as all hell.