A/N: You ever been sitting there, minding your own business, when the undeniable urge to write powetry came over you? Merlin poetry? And not just any Merlin poetry... But crack Merlin poetry? If you have, then you know where this came from! If you haven't, read, and enjoy! Maybe even review!

A dark and stormy knight

(Because that's not cliché, right?)

Thundered into Camelot

Armor shiny, like a robot.


He met a warlock at the gate

(A man well below the average weight)

And stopped to pass the time of day

And ask to be pointed on his way.


(Here the author stopped to revive her dying imagination.)


"I don't know where I'm going, see,"

He told this Merlin quite sadly.

"And directions I'd appreciate,

Or wherever I'm going, I'll be late.


"I'm afraid I've lost my map and script,

Some nameless extra borrowed it.

But I see your character is main

And directions would help keep me sane."


(Here the author tried to stop to save her reputation.)


"Are you a knight?" the warlock asked,

And the man felt quite sassed.

"Of course," he growled, his look black.

"And a mighty skillèd one at that!"


"And are you evil?" the boy questioned.

"Have you pillaged, killed, and sinned?

Are you vengeful? A sorcerer, mayhap?

And an easily angered chap?"


(Here she discovered she couldn't stop, much to her irritation.)


Pointless fury filled the knight

As he glared at the boy in his sight.

"Indeed I am," he gruffly affirmed.

"And there is some man whom has my anger earned…


"But I still can't remember who I am,

Or why my wrath is now at hand…"

"I think I know," said the warlock, looking meek.

"You're the Villain of the Week."


(Here the disappointed fans resorted to sedation.)


"You'd be off to kill my master and friend,

And show him his untimely end."

Merlin pointed down the street—

"That way is where you two would meet."


"I remember now!" the knight cried.

"Because of his father, my family died!

I'll take my revenge on the son!

Villain-like, I'll then have won!


(Here drugging failed, and she continued with her sad creation.)


"I thank you for your kind help,"

He told the warlock, who gave a yelp.

"I can't let you be on your way,"

The warlock was compelled to say.


"No?" The knight was confused.

"No," the warlock said as power from him oozed.

"For I protect the prince." His golden eyes flashed.

And then the baddie was dead, his throat was slashed.


(Here the story finally ends, to everyone's elation!)