So I'm literally cringing as I read this story. It was so badly written I just don't know what to say. So I'm re-writing it.
"Miss, just get on the train." The deep slow voice sighed. I could smell the years of smoke running out of his mouth. Crinkling my nose in disgust I looked up at the train that sat before me. 10,000 pounds of pure steel. I rather die than get in a steel contraption and die from god knows what.
"I'm good." I replied to the old man, worn from ages of growing. I looked up into his beady small charcoal colored eyes. They seemed to fill with such hatred staring at me.
"You have five seconds to get on the train." I crossed my arms and tilted my head to the sky.
"Or what?" I dared to question him.
"We leave without you." His questions made me sigh, leaving my arms to limp by my sides. It's true I can't let them leave without me. I have to make it to my dance competition. The one I have been waiting for all year. The ultimate dance competition. Dumping I nodded my head and stepped on the train. Oh dear lord this is going to be a long ride.
So there you go. The first sneak peek into what the new story well look like. Please do not read ahead. I have to edit every single chapter. I advise you not to read ahead, you well be faced with my 7th grade writing. Good luck. Bye lovelies 3 xoxo