Lost. Chapter 1


Warning: Mild yaoi, character death and violence(Lots of blood).

Pairings:GerIta, Spamano, USUK, FrUK and PruHun.

Human names: Ludwig- Germany
Feliciano- N. Italy.
Alfred- America
Romano- S. Italy

A/N: Hello guys! Thank you for viewing my first Hetalia story! Sorry, I've had a bunch of stories in my iPod and I never got around to posting it. I just wanted to post the first chapter to see if you guys would like it. I still need to plan the entire thing but I can promise you there is a lot of action in here! So the speed I update depends on reviews (Just a little encouragement, da?) Thanks for reading! ^J^

Disclaimer: Hikari does not own or claim to own Hetalia or the songs used in the fanfiction.

Cannot touch, cannot hold
Cannot be together
Cannot love, cannot kiss,
Cannot have each other

Must be strong, and we must let go
Cannot say what our hearts must know
How can I not love you?
What do I tell my heart?
When do I not want you here in my arms?
How does one waltz away from all of the memories?
How do I not miss you when you are gone?

Cannot dream, Cannot share,
Sweet and tender moments
Cannot feel how we feel,
Must pretend it's over

Must be brave, and we must go on
Must not say what we've known all along
How can I not love you?
What do I tell my heart?
When do I not want you here in my arms?
How does one waltz away from all of the memories?
How do I not miss you when you are gone?
How can I not love you?

Must be brave, and we must be strong
Cannot say what we've known all along
How can I not love you?
What do I tell my heart?
When do I not want you here in my arms?
How does one waltz away from all of the memories?
How do I not miss you when you are gone?

How can I not love you when you are gone?

Lyrics to How Can I Not Love You by Joy Enriquez

There were some things that are as simple as black and white; the moon, trees, grass. They were always there and were unappreciated.

They were the things that you always had but took for granted. People see them everyday but never really appreciate them.

Italy was the same. Germany had never thought about what life without the carefree Italian would be like. He loved having his little Italy around but he could never tell the carefree man how he felt. What was the need when they had forever? He was so used to having Feliciano around that he never considered what would happen if the Italian left. That's why the day Feliciano betrayed him, the life he had built after World War II crashed down.

A groan echoed in the small, dim room. Ludwig's eyes fluttered open. He blinked his eyes a few times, a vain attempt to chase away the drowsiness he felt. He felt a warm, sticky substance on the top of his head. He instantly identified it as blood since he was familiar with the feeling of blood on his body from all the years of war.

He looked around the dim room. As his eyes adjusted to the light he could make out a door at the other end of the room. For the first time he realized he was tied to a pole behind his back. He tried recalling the events prior in his head but much to his frustration, he couldn't. He couldn't remember any of the events leading up to his capture. He could feel it on the tip of his tongue but he couldn't remember where he had been or who he had been with. Who would want to capture him? It had been years since the end of World War II. Sure, some people still held some grudges against Germany and Hitler was still hated by many people all over the world but he couldn't think of any countries that would do this to him.

His next thoughts ways to escape. He couldn't reach the pocket knife he always had on him and he couldn't break his bonds that were rubbing his wrists raw.

The door groaned loudly as a man stepped in, his booted feet echoing into the room. Ludwig looked up, his heart quickened as he recognized the man.

"Feli!" he exclaimed joyfully. Feliciano Vargas, North Italy had been his close friend since World War I when Germany found him in a tomato box. Feliciano was kind hearted and would help anyone if he could, even if it was his enemy. He was an artist and trader, not a fighter though, but he was skilled at running and escaping. Feliciano would break him out of here and maybe he could tell him what happened.

Even in the dim light, Ludwig could see Feliciano's smirk. Ludwig's eyes furrowed together. The smirk looked so alien on Feliciano's face that usually harbored his trademark closed eyed grin.

"Feli, what are you doing?" Ludwig asked as Feliciano stepped calmly towards the vulnerable German. An icy laugh echoed in the dark room. Chills raced up Ludwig's spine. Germany's eyebrows knitted together further.

"You always were an oblivious fool, worse then Alfred sometimes. Do you not remember?" Feliciano asked coldly, his voice heavy in that cute Italian accent. Germany shook his head. Feliciano crouched down in front of Germany talking Ludwig's chin in his gloved hand. Ludwig blushed at their close proximity, "We met at the cafe." Feliciano stopped to let Ludwig think. That was all that Italy needed to say. The events suddenly rushed back into Ludwig's head.

Looking down at the laminated menu, Ludwig quickly translated the Italian as he waited for the personification of Italy. Italian was such a strange language sometimes. He heard rapid footsteps of boots on cobblestone and looked up.

Feliciano quickly ran towards him, his russet hair swaying in rhythm to his footsteps. Seeing Feliciano's hair being swept off of his face took Ludwig's breath away. The Italian truly was breathtaking. Feliciano had a thin build. He was a runner and a strong, prosperous country. He didn't have the muscles or strength that Germany or America had but he had muscles in all the right places and Germany could sense his inner strength.

Feliciano's was always bright, even when he was sad. He had a certain way of looking adorable no matter what he was doing. He had fair, tan skin and bright brown eyes. He always seemed to be smiling or laughing. He loved to bounce around and eat pasta or hug Ludwig, Japan or his fratello.

"Ludwig! I'm sorry I'm so late! Romano yelled at me again!" Feliciano said as he sat down. Ludwig remained stotic. Curse that Romano always yelling at his sweet little brother.

"Just try to be more on time next time." Ludwig said sternly. Wait, what? That's not what Ludwig wanted to say at all! Feliciano nodded silently looking like a beaten puppy. Ludwig wanted to hug the Italian, make him smile and apologize for being so harsh but his mouth wouldn't form words. Ludwig sighed and read through the menu again, trying to decide on pizza or pasta.

Germany and Feliciano had finished eating their meals quickly. .

"Ve~ pasta's delicious!" the Italian said. Ludwig allowed a small smile. He loved seeing the Italians smile. It was contagious. It could easily brighten a room.

"Italian food is delicious." Ludwig said. Italy face lit up like a young child at Christmas. Ludwig's heart fluttered slightly. He blushed and looked away. Why couldn't he always make the Italian smile like that? All he had to do was say one nice thing. Wait…Why was he feeling like this? He shouldn't have these kinds of feelings for another man, should he?

"Ludwig?" Feliciano asked. Germany blinked to clear his thoughts and looked up at the Italian.

"Ja?" he said. Feliciano frowned slightly.

"I said I'd be right back. I have to use the restroom." Feliciano said. Ludwig nodded, blinking in surprise that he missed the Italians statement.

"Alright, I'll be right here." Ludwig said. Feliciano smiled as he stood up and disappeared inside the quaint cafe. It was pretty empty at the moment. It seemed a little strange to Ludwig especially since they were in Italy but that means he just had less people around which was fine by him.

Ludwig tried to distract himself from thinking of the handsome Italian. He thought back to what he was going to present at the World Conference coming up. No doubt, it would be the only sensible one. No one else ever came up with rational ideas.

Before Ludwig ever had time to react or even grasp what was happening, he was thrown to the ground by a blast, bits of rock and dust raining down on him. He heard voices screaming and crying around him. A large chunk of rock struck his head. /Feli!/ Ludwig thought before the suffocating darkness closed around him, wrapping him tightly in it's icy clutches.

"Feliciano! Thank Gott your ok! I thought something horrible happened to you!" Ludwig exclaimed straining against the ties to get closer to his friend he thought he had lost.

There was no trace of a smile on Feliciano's face. "Shut up!" he growled. Ludwig froze. Did Feliciano just say that? He never thought in his wildest dreams that Feliciano could say something so coldly and heartlessly.

"Wha-?" Ludwig asked. He was cut short by a hard slap to the face. He was dumbstruck for a moment before he realized Feliciano had slapped him. Reeling back, hurt flashed through him but not because of the slap. What was happening to his pasta loving Feli? Feliciano roughly grabbed Germanys face and forced him to look into his caramel colored eyes. No! No no,no! This was wrong! This wasn't his Feli! This is all just a dream! Ludwig's own blue eyes widened to see the anger in the Italians eyes.

"I said shut up!" Feliciano yelled squeezing Ludwig's sore face tightly. Ludwig looked at the Italian in confusion. The wheels in his mind were spinning rapidly, trying to make sense of the sudden change in his carefree Italian. Italy let go of his face and stood up.

"You really are stupid! Iplanted the bomb! I never went to the bathroom and I was never late because Romano yelled at me!" Feliciano yelled motioning with his hands. Ludwig's jaw gaped. H...His Feli set off the bomb? His Feli had captured him? Oh Gott, why would Feli do it? What was happening? Why would Feli do that? Why would Feli want to hurt him? Why would he bomb a restaurant in his own country?

"Heh, you didn't expect that did you? Don't say anything. I don't want to hear your stupid voice!" Feliciano said harshly. Ludwig felt his heart being crushed in his chest. His heart beat quickened, pounding against his chest so loudly he was sure Feliciano could hear it.

"I've waited so long for this moment. You and all your buddies will pay for yelling at me and bullying me for all those years!" Feliciano said. Guilt quickly washed over Ludwig.

"Feli, I..." Ludwig said. Before Ludwig could blink, Feliciano had a knife pressed up against Ludwig's throat with a quickness and swiftness that Ludwig didn't know Feliciano had. He immediately shut up, his eyes widening in surprise.

"I told you to shut up! I don't care what you have to say so don't say a word or I'll slice your throat up like a pig, you understand?" Italy hissed looking intensely into Germanys eyes. A cold feeling took over Ludwig's heart realizing that Feliciano was serious. He nodded slightly, his shoulders slumping.

"Good boy." Feliciano said drawing back the knife. "Don't even bother with screaming. No one will hear you!" he said. He turned and left the room as quickly as he had come. With the door shut Ludwig slumped, his head hanging in guilt, shame and sadness. Oh dear Gott, how long had Feliciano been like this inside? How long had he been harboring those murderous feelings for him? How could Ludwig have been so blind? How could he not have seen what the Italian had been hiding? He always thought Feliciano was easy to read, wearing all his emotions on his face. He had been wrong, dead wrong. His Feli, his poor Feli that he thought he had known was gone and it was all his fault for not showing him how he felt.

Ludwig's stomach churned suddenly and next thing he knew, he got sick. He didn't care though. He only wanted the old Feliciano back, hisFeliciano.

A/N: Hi! I never realized how cool national anthems are. I started listening to a few. I laughed my butt off when I listened to England's, it sounded so much like America the Beautiful. I can so Iggy getting ticked at Alfred. Lol XD I'm gonna try to squeeze that in here. Maybe on the third chapter. Lol. What really bothered me though is all the nasty comments. French and English people going back and forth, Americans calling Germans Nazi's and Germans calling Americans fat. Isn't that a little childish? Those things are all in our past now. I can understand if you're upset about some current issues but you don't need to take it out on an entire nationality. Seriously though guys, go check it out. They're really cool.

The next chapter will be from Feliciano's point of view. Please R&R! It'll make me write faster!