Shinigami-cat: Fucking flamer...

Gaia: So this is the last chapter?

Shinigami-cat: Dude I'm swamped with assignments! I can't keep writing this!

Gaia: Just moderate your time.

Shinigami-cat: I'm writing three other fan fictions and I got an idea for this other one that's really gory!

Gilbert: Anyway the first one is from Grellypops

GRELLY HAS RETURNED. *Climbs through Window* It's been awhile huh? OH WELL. I

brought a piñata! *Throws candy like confetti* Onward with the dares and

stuffs! :D

Alfred: CANDY!

Romania: I dare you to play the Pocky-game with me! *blushublushu* :/D

Romania: ... Fine... (Picks up a pocky stick and plays the game with you)

Three minutes later...

Shinigami-cat: Brake it up or get a room you two!

Canada: Hey Mattie, Are you proud of Justin Beiber? Or would you rather stuff

his face in an oven like me ANDAND I bought one of those Canadian lumberjack

shirts yesterday /has been wanting one for ages B']

Matthew: He's okay I just think that he's a little annoying. Well lumberjack shirts are cool. I have one and I think Alfred dose too somewhere.

Alfred: Yep! It's in my closet somewhere.

America: What do you think of Rebecca Black?

Alfred: ... anyone else want to stab themselves in the ears until you bleed to death?

Hey Shini-Chan, How would like YOUR OWN ZOMBIE

ARMY? Pretty sweet right?

Shinigami-cat: I know I already have one ^^

Oh and I declare Romania and China as my Waifus!

Romania: ... Walking away now.


/Leaves Piñata filled with presents and climbs out the window

Shinigami-cat: Veva piñata! Filled with fun for everyone!

~Oh and congrats Greece & Japan! You two make a lovely couple 3 Lots of Love

to you two from me, Grelly!

Kiku: Thank you very much.

Hercules: Zzzzz.

Feliciano: Ve how nice.

Ludwig: Next is H. E. Vaughn

*the stork from Looney Tunes flies in, H. E. Vaughn on its back; she climbs

off (is wearing Steampunk outfit); stork lands in front of Japan*

Kiku: ...?

Stork: Congr- *hic* congradu- *hic* Uh, Congradultions, ur a muther! *hands

baby and flies away*

Don't worry, I rode with him to make sure he got here and that nothing

happened to your child. I would never intentionally put any small child in


Kiku: He is so cute.

Shinigami-cat: What's his name?

Kiku: I'm not sure... What do you think Hercules?

Hercules: ... How about Zeus?

Kiku: Well since he looks like me... I it's fair that we call him Zeus.

Shinigami-cat: Zeus looks so cute! Bella take care of him.

Bella: I'll take good care of him Kiku, Hercules. You two have nothing to worry about! (Walks off with Zeus)

Anyways, my marching band is doing a Steampunk show this year, so that's why

I'm dressed this way (sweet, right?) ON WITH THE DARES!

Gaia: (looks at H.) I love steampunk. I approve of your choice of cloths.

1: Mattie, come to school with me tomorrow! It's spirit week, and for Sports

Team day tomorrow, I'M GOING TO BE A TORONTO MAPLE LEAF! (if someone's gonna

be a hockey team, it's gotta be Canadian, cause all others cant compare!)

Matthew: Okay. It sounds like lots of fun ^^

2: Ivan, who, out of all the people in this room, is your favorite person

(honestly) and why? give at least 5 reasons

Ivan: ... Well the person I want to kill the least is Toris because he can cook, do my paper work when I'm lazy, he doesn't sell my cloths like Raivis dose, he looks very cute when he is trembling in fear and he looks very cute in a maids dress.

Toris: ...

Everyone else: O.O

Ivan: What? It's true ^^

3: Arthur, can you find a way to get me to the new years celebration in London

this year? my school's marching band was asked to play, but i cant get


Arthur: I'll send star dust to get you.

4: Sweden, we have an exchange student here from your's 40 degrees

over here, and he's in shorts...may i ask what's up with that?

Berwald: I's c'lder ‚n S'wd'n.

5: Francis, je suis désolé d'être si cruel pour vous ces chapitres. Il

genre de vient avec le territoire. Mais vous devez admettre, c'était assez

amusant...quand vous n'étiez pas se faire tuer ou de mettre le feu! ..Now I

dare you to listen to Friday by Rebecca Black on repeat for 2 hours.

Francis: c'est bon mon cher. la puissance de l'amour de moi à chaque fois guéri. Et oui, c'est amusant wa quand je n'étais pas se blesser… WHY ? WHY WOULD YOU MAKE ME LISTEN TO THAT ?

Shinigami-cat: SUFFER BITCH! (Shoves head phones onto Francis's head and makes him listen to Rebecca black)

Two hours later...

Francis: (currently curled up into a ball) I hate you all...

6: Fratelli, voi siete i migliori fratelli chiunque potrebbe mai chiedere. Mi

piace la tua personalità contrastanti e solo di essere con voi. Io sono

fortunato e orgoglioso di essere chiamato tuo sorellina. ...Now I dare you to

take me to see Italy (a whole tour of the north and south wold be awesome!)

Feliciano: grazie sorella! Sono felice di chiamare mia sorella è troppo e sono felice che si desidera chiamare noi i tuoi fratelli! We would love to! See you in Italy!

Lovino: qualunque cosa. Non mi interessa. Fine. But you're paying for your own plane ticket damn it!

Okay, well, that's all of them! And now, I am off to destroy whoever flamed


Shinigami-cat: Take this chainsaw! (Throws you a chainsaw)


do at least one more after this! Because if you don't, that's only 23


and 1408 *shudders* I couldn't even finish that one...or One Missed Call...

Shinigami-cat: Sorry but it is the last chapter... nope I haven't seen that movie. But 1408... I saw that at the movies and there was a black out right in that scene where they open that door. Gaia screamed like a girl.

Gaia: Liar.

Later, guys! *steampunk airship floats mysteriously outside window* Oh,

there's my ride! *climbs on airship and flies away*

Gaia: That's awesome!

Roderich: Next is from thedragonballbabe

*Runs in and grabs Shini-chan and starts shaking her viciously. Has a crazy

look in her eye*

Shinigami-cat: HELP ME! I'm being man handled!

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN, LAST CHAPTER! *turns and looks at the rest of the

cast* I-I... I'm gonna miss you guys... Especially you, Ivan... *hugs Ivan and

starts crying quietly.*

Ivan: It's okay ^J^

...Crying? I'm not crying. Seriously. *wipes eyes*

Well, time for dares.

Sweden- ...Okay... I forgive you. Tino, you're so lucky... Berwald's a good

kisser. And WHY am I not allowed into the party in your pants? You invited the

world, and last time I checked, I'M PART OF THE FREAKING WORLD!

Berwald: W's I dr'nk wh'n I s'id th't?

Francis: Yes! Ohononononon!

Shinigami-cat: I remember that! You said that at the party after Kiku and Hercules got married!

Berwald: D'mn.

...You know what? We're having a party in Sweden's pants. And EVERYONE (except

France) is going! That means RIGHT NOW! *creates mega-sized Rape closet and

starts dragging everyone in* No host immunity!

Berwald: O.O

Everyone else: O.O



One hour later...

Everyone walks out of the Rape closet and shall never speak of it again... it was scary.

Russia- Th-thanks for the advice... It did help a little... *sits down on

Russia's lap and holds him. Ocasionally winces at memories of General Winter.*

I.. Uh... *whispering* I love you...

Ivan: (Hugs and kisses) I love you too.

America- Aww, last chapter of servitude! So... Tell me. WHAT DID YOU AND

RUSSIA ROLE-PLAY? And here! *gives different slutty-maid dress* Wear it! ROAR!

Alfred: ... He made me dress like a rabbit... and he was a wolf... You can guess what I had to do in exchange for my life... (Picks up new dress and walks off to put it on. He comes back in about ten minutes)


Alfred: Oh shit...


TO GET HITCHED! The wedding'll be held after the rest of my dares, kay?

Feliciano: Ve! Ludwig we're getting married!

Ludwig: ... damn...


Finland- D'awww, you and Sweden make such a cute couple... You're getting

married too! And yes, you'll be a wife. In a dress.

Tino: What?

Berwald: Y'u d'n't w'nt to g'et m'rried? =(

Tino: NO I DO!

Berwald: =)

Okay, anyone else wanna get married? We can have a huge multi-wedding! *stares

at America and Russia* ANYONE? You know, maybe... *stares intently at Russia

and America. Slowly pulls out a wedding dress, staring at America.*

Ivan: Alfred as your master you must marry me.

Alfred: ... yes... master... MOTHER FUCKER!

England- YOU! *glomps England* I CAN'T BELIEVE I DIDN'T REMEMBER! FERB (from




Arthur: I have no time for childish cartoons... I'M NOT MARRYING THE FROG!

Francis: It's a dare you have to!

Arthur: Fuck...

Romano- I'll be right back! *grabs Romano and drags him off to a normal

closet. Emerges half an hour later. Romano is now in a sleevless, glimmering

white wedding dress. He has a matching train, and is carrying a bouqet of red

and white carnations.)

Lovino: I hate you all...


Antonio: THANK YOU! (Crash tackles Lovino and starts to kiss)

Shinigami-cat: ... save it for the honey moon please...

China- Rape closet. Korea. You. NOW.

Yao: D=

Im Yong Soo: DAZE! (drags Yao to a Rape closet)

Shinigami-cat: We'll just leave them for now...

Prussia- I give you free reign to claim as many vital regions as you can in

one hour. Ready, annnnnnnd... GO! (No immunity from anyone. Me, Shini-chan,


Gilbert: SWEET! (Grabs the nearest nation and drags the to a Rape closet) YOU'RE FIRST JAPAN!


Hercules: What do you think doing Gilbert?

Gilbert: ... Oh shit... (Hercules punches Gilbert knocking him out cold)

Shinigami-cat: ... well that was a fail...

Norway- *stares.* Hm... *claps hands and Norway is dressed up as a cute little


Lukas: WHAT?


Mathias: =D

Okay, so who's getting married? France and England, Finland and Sweden,

Denmark and Norway, Germany and Italy, Russia and America, Spain and Romano...


*wedding chapel poofs in, everyone is in formal clothes, and all the crap that

happened at Greece and Japan's wedding.*

Shinigami-cat: (Takes her place as the priest again and cracks her knuckles) Ladies and Gaia... we have gathered here to witness the marriage of ... FrUK, SuFin, DenNor, GerIta, RussAmer and Spamano in holy matrimony...

(After all the ceremonies and parties)

Uhm... Russia... I-I know you're married, but... *wraps arms around his neck*

B-become one with me? For old times sake?

Ivan: After this chapter da? ^J^

Well guys, it's been fun! I'll miss visiting you all... GROUP HUG, EVERYONE

IN! ...FRANCE! GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY ASS! *bitch-slaps him*

Francis: OUCH!

*walks out the front door.*

Shinigami-cat: WHAT THE HELL!

Gaia: Get over it...

Francis: Next is from FergiSensai x

Walks in through the back door carring something wrapped up in a blanket)

Shinigami-cat: What's in the blanket? CANDY?

oh hey guys! I haz more dares! (adjusts thing in her arms) oh it's my baby! Russia your a daddy (reveales baby)


right dares but before Russia hold her for me?

Ivan: ... Okay... but if Natalia asks this is Arthurs!

1. Dotisu i dare you to bathe in pasta sauce!

Ludwig: ... weird... but okay...

Walks into the bathroom and takes a bath in sauce.

2. America I ask you to have babies with iggy (waves a magic wand and a baby

appears) you'll thank me later

Alfred: ... Cute... but now I have another state... What should we call her Iggy?

Arthur: ...New England.

Alfred: Lame... how about New America!

Shinigami-cat: So original...

right I'm stuffed Russia you can keep her for a chapter (kisses Russia's cheek

and skips out the door) x


Bella: I'll take care of her. She's cute.

Gaia: Next is from like. Aliens

*jumps in through the window and stays for a few seconds after some police

cars passed by*


Oh, hi guys. *smiles*

Shinigami-cat: I like your prison clothes! Can I have them?

Wait... *changes orange unawesome prison clothes to a butler cosplay*

Don't dare call the police or I'll... Nevermind. So... My dare... I dare

Belarus to seduce America and fuck him in the rape closet. If you will, I'll

give you these pictures of Ivan in a maid dress, sleeping, bullying Latvia,

eating, drinking vodka, showering, bullying the Italy twins, stalking China,

etc. And, I'll attend your wedding. Capiche~?

Natalia: ... (Grabs Alfred by the collar and drags him into the closet)


One hour later...

They emerge.

I will send the pictures to you once you finish my dare.

Natalia: No I want them now.

That is all for today. I WILL come back. Bye.

Shinigami-cat: No you won't. This is the last chapter.

*disappears into a cloud of smoke*

Shinigami-cat: Next is NekoAngel007

*a bush of black roses start growing in the middle of the room to form into

NekoAngel007 in a dress made of black roses*

Shinigami-cat: I want that dress!

Hello! I'm here again with some dares!

I'm sorry that there had been some haters in the crowd. They just can't accept

that some people are just dedicated to Hetalia. I hope you guys never die out.

Everyone: We never will!

Everyone~ Excluding Shini-san (cause she's not a country) I've been hearing

rumors that countries have split personalities of their former selves. Like

Russia has the split personality of USSR(Soviet). Is it true?

Ivan: That's true! There is always two sides to every country. For example Ludwig during world war two had episodes were he went completely bat shit crazy.

Ludwig: Don't remind me...

Antonio: I went crazy during my conquistador years ^_^

Shinigami-cat: That's nothing to be proud of...

Antonio: I know...

Italy~ Tell me some details of the last challenge I gave you and your brother.

*ultimate smirk*

Feliciano: ... We saw... things... disturbing things... things that I would only do with Ludwig...

Lovino: Shut up.

The Biggest Ukes in Hetalia according to Shini-san~ Sing "I Can't Decide" by

Scissors Sisters. Hope its not to long. (And after you see the video look at

anime munters!)

Shinigami-cat: I LOVE THAT SONG! B.T.W saw that video and LOVED IT!

Gaia: So who's going to sing it?

Shinigami-cat: Umm... Feli, Lovi, Mattie and Iggy!

A stage suddenly appears and the lights go out. Suddenly the lights go back on and said 4 biggest ukes according to Shinigami-cat are on the stage.

Feliciano: It's not easy having yourself a good time
Greasing up those bets and betters
Watching out they don't four-letter

Arthur: Fuck and kiss you both at the same time
Smells-like something I've forgotten
Curled up died and now it's rotten

Lovino: I'm not a gangster tonight
Don't want to be a bad guy

Matthew: I'm just a loner baby
And now you're gotten in my way

All together now: I can't decide
Whether you should live or die
Oh, you'll probably go to heaven
Please don't hang your head and cry
No wonder why
My heart feels dead inside
It's cold and hard and petrified
Lock the doors and close the blinds
We're going for a ride

Arthur: It's a bitch convincing people to like you

Lovino: If I stop now call me a quitter

Feliciano: If lies were cats you'd be a litter

Matthew: Pleasing everyone isn't like you

Lovino: Dancing jigs until I'm crippled

Arthur: Slug ten drinks I won't get pickled

Matthew: I've got to hand it to you
You've played by all the same rules

Feliciano: It takes the truth to fool me
And now you've made me angry

All together now: I can't decide
Whether you should live or die
Oh, you'll probably go to heaven
Please don't hang your head and cry
No wonder why
My heart feels dead inside
It's cold and hard and petrified
Lock the doors and close the blinds
We're going for a ride

Feliciano: Oh I could throw you in the lake

Arthur: Or feed you poisoned birthday cake

Matthew: I won't deny I'm gonna miss you when you're gone

Lovino: Oh I could bury you alive

Feliciano: But you might crawl out with a knife

Arthur: And kill me when I'm sleeping
That's why

All together now: I can't decide
Whether you should live or die
Oh, you'll probably go to heaven
Please don't hang your head and cry
No wonder why
My heart feels dead inside
It's cold and hard and petrified
Lock the doors and close the blinds
We're going for a ride

Shini-san~ I wanna see some Nyotalia!

Shinigami-cat: Your wish is my command! (Waves wand and everyone changes into the opposite gender... Even the hosts...)


Female Ivan kols darkly at female America. Female France laughs and trues to grope female England. Female Gilbert gropes female Canada while the others aren't looking. Male Shinigami-cat looks down at her/his now flat chest. Female Gaia looks down at his/her HUGE chest and falls over because of the sudden shift in weight. Female Lovino is screaming at female Ludwig and female Antonio.

Shinigami-cat: Okay... as much as I like not having back problems and bleeding once a month like some freaky demon... Maybe we should change back? (Waves wand and everyone is back to the right gender)

France~ Why don't you go fuck yourself(literally) in the rape closet while

England(I must admit, I'm starting to enjoy your suffering) watches you.

*thorns start sprouting from the dress*

Francis: I don't mind. Come along Arthur.

Arthur: WHAT?

Francis drags Arthur to the rape closet.

Prussia~ Tell us what "awesome" position your going to try the next time you

have sex.

Gilbert: ... Depends on who I'm with and how drunk I am... But I'll go for a 69 with Matthew.

Matthew: O_O

Well thats all I have for now. Though for fun I'm going to tell you all what I

like in doujinshis' and fanfic about Hetalia: some incest, pairings of some

countries that has had some real conflicts in history, het/yuri/yaoi(all are

good), violence/gore, songfics especially when the crew is singing it. There

are several other elements that make a perfect fanservice for me but thats all

for now. Oh! And what I hate the most is BIG crack.

Shinigami-cat: I agree.

Tata for now! See you for later!

Shinigami-cat: Later ^_^

Roderich: The last one is from joy2theworlddannyphantom

*walks out of the shadows as if it's perfectly normal* Hi!

Shinigami-cat: It is normal ^_^

Now... What to do, who to torture, how to do it...

Shinigami-cat: Oh I know! Choose Gaia! Choose my brother!

Well, let's start with the basics. Prussia go f*ck Canada. Alfred...*GLARE OF


Gilbert: Sweet! 69 it is!

Matthew: Oh maple...


No I won't, it'll taste like McDonalds. I HATE McDonalds.

Alfred: Thank God... McDonalds is awesome!

Shinigami-cat: It tastes like shit Alfred...

So... Go jump in a hole and die. After being with Ivan.


In a room.

With no way out.

Wearing nothing.


just so I can see how this turns out.


Ivan: Kolkolkolkol

*yawns and attracted out white feathered wings* I wanna drop France from

400000 feet... And so I shall.

Francis: ... Damn it...

joy2theworlddannyphantom grabs Francis and flies up 400000 feet and drops him. As Francis hurtles towards the ground screaming Shinigami-cat puts up an umbrella to shield herself from the inevitable splatter. Francis hits the ground with a SQUISH! Blood and stuff fly everywhere and Gaia gets the scrapper to scrape Francis off the floor. Suddenly gun shots are heard.

Later. I broke my wing. (Stupid hunters, f*cking, stupid...*mumble mumble*)

Mm... I'm just not in my evil mood today... must have been Johnny and Micahs


Forget my rambling. Literally.

Shinigami-cat: Forget your what?

England I drink your blood now. *bites into his neck and drinks most if his

blood, ripping some flesh off with my teeth as I move away*

Everyone: O.O WTF? OMFG!

Arthur: (Slowly bleeding to death)

Ah~ *wipes mouth, eyes glowing red* Much better. Now, who to eat alive~?

Shinigami-cat: Eat Lovino! He's annoying!

Lovino: HEY!

You have a week to decide who I get to eat, before I do it for you. I haven't

eaten in months, I've been starved.

Shinigami-cat: As I said eat Lovino.

*clears throat, eyes silver blue again* Well, I best be going. I have allot to

do and- MY ANGEL SENSES ARE TINGLING. Al must be in trouble again.

Alfred: Shit is Russia behind me?

Kay bye. *disappears in smoke like shadows, leaving a black feather behind*

Shinigami-cat: Later... Well that's all from us here... so later

Lovino: Finally we can leave this hell hole.

Gaia: We should end things with a bang Shinigami-cat.

Shinigami-cat: Couldn't agree more.

Everyone: (Extremely worried)

Shinigami-cat runs out of the room and come's back with a microphone and walks around the room. Gaia is playing the piano and starts to play.

Shinigami-cat: We've had a lot of fun here haven't we? Remember all those times Francis got hurt/killed? Remember all the laughs we had when people were forced into the Rape closet? Remember how I tried to Kill Lovino over and over again? Well... Now our time is over... And I guess all I can say is... Time to blow this shit up!

Suddenly Gaia tosses a gas mask to Shinigami-cat while putting on his. Shinigami-cat pulled out a remote and pressed a button. The roof opened up and two ejector seats emerged. Gaia and Shinigami-cat strapped themselves in and held up two grenades.

Gaia: Later suckers.

Everyone else: WHAT? GAIA HOW COULD YOU?

Gaia: Have you seen who my twin is?

Shinigami-cat: Hahahaha! (Pulls pin and throws the grenade across the room) Later people!

Gaia and Shinigami-cat are ejected out of the house just as the grenade explodes... Fun times people!