A/N: This just came to me in the shower. It's nothing special, but I found it amusing. Enjoy.
I own zilch.
Tyki phased through the wall of rocks that his young exorcist enemy had created. She was rather weak but Tyki, like Lulubell, had a certain affinity to playing with their victims before going in for the final kill. The girl gasped at his seemingly impossible feat.
"You…you got through that?" she stuttered.
"It seems as though I have," Tyki replied tugging on one of his white gloves. "You're rather new at this aren't you? Is this your first time fighting alone?" The cave echoed with his footsteps and her heavy breathing. The girl pushed a blonde strand of behind her ear.
"What does it matter? Long as I get rid of you, I will have proven myself," she declared with false confidence.
"Really now? Tyki asked. So you won't miss anyone? You don't have someone or something precious to miss?"
"It's none of your concern," she hissed. Tyki chuckled at her ferocity.
"Do you know who I am girl?" he said, letting his skin turn darker and a psychotic smile appearing on his face. The exorcist gasped and stepped back.
"M-my-my g-g-od, yo-you're T-Tyki, n-Noah o-of p-pleasure." Tyki started laughing again.
"Correct. I knew you were a smart one." He stepped towards her with slow, deliberate paces. He still wore the freakish smile on his face. His palms were facing outwards and two small butterfly-looking creatures emerged from his hands. "Do you know what these are little exorcist?" she shook her head, slowly backing up against a wall. "These are special Golems of mine called Teez. They are particularly found of human flesh." He kept walking towards the young girl until he had backed her up against the cold, moist wall of the cave. She gasped.
"Please don't kill me!" she wailed! "I'll do anything!" The exorcist began to cry. "Please, please! I'll let you take me. You can have my body! I won't tell a soul, just please let me live!" Tyki stood there with annoyance written all over his face.
"Why would I want your body, girl?" he asked between his gritted teeth. The girl suddenly decided her shoes were more interesting than the Noah in front of her. Her face was a bright red. "Well, you are the Noah of Pleasure…" she said. She could hear Tyki move; he took a couple steps closer and stopped. The exorcist tensed up, waiting for the sickening sensation of foreign hands caressing her body. She felt nothing touch her.
"Is that what you really think?" Tyki said. His voice had returned to a calmer state. She looked up to see that he had resumed his calmer personality. He watched her nod her head. He rolled his eyes, "Does it ever occur to any of you that just because I am the Noah of Pleasure does not mean I am at all interested in having sex?" The girl didn't respond. "Seriously, if you go by the actual definition, pleasure is anything that makes you happy. Sex causes pleasure, not the other way around. You see?"
The exorcist was now looking at him with wide eyes.
Tyki continued, pulling a cigarette out of his pocket and lighting it. "My brother is the Noah of desire. He gets even more of the crap than I do. Yes, he is a slight nymphomaniac but he is a greedy, nymphomaniac. Tyki slicked his hair back as he let smoke escape from his lips. "Desire refers to being envious of that long haired exorcist because she has better legs than you. The girl suddenly frowned and expected her calves.
Tyki smirked and gave another puff from his cigarette. "Desire is not lust. Lust is Lulubell's specialty. Ironically enough, she is less sexual than the Millennium Earl. And let me tell you, he really doesn't get around.
"So you are saying that you are just the Noah of doing things that make you happy?" the exorcist asked.
"Precisely," Tyki said. "That doesn't mean, however, I would pass up a chance to indulge myself in a different kind of pleasure." He scooted closer to the girl and pulled her body onto his lap and whispered huskily into her ear. "Let me show you what real pleasure is."
She gasped and wiggled against him in forbidden anticipation. Then, Tyki leaned close to her. The exorcist fluttered her eyes shut and waited. Tyki smiled and with the elegance of any gentleman, stole her heart.
Literally of course.
He pushed her twitching body off his and let his Teez consume her. He gave a little laugh as he tore a button off the top of her cloak. Gripping her heart in one hand and holding the small golden button in the other Tyki walked out into the night. Road was sitting on a rock outside. She took a lollipop out of her mouth and tilted her head to the side.
"Have fun?" she asked. Tyki nodded, "It was…pleasurable."