Hmmm. I wonder what would happen if I tried deleting stuff?
Like I said before, memories are like chains. I can disconnect them and reconstruct them, but I can't exactly delete the memories themselves. Of course, now that I think about it, it makes it rather difficult for me. Since I do have a perfect memory, I can remember every second of my writing and sketching. Which means I can remember erasing, and coloring, and erasing again, and etc. Meaning all those memories should still be in my head.
Maybe I could tamper with my own head? I really don't want to remember exactly how many times I used the eraser. That would be dangerous, though…
It's possible I could try it on a Heartless. They have a very… limited memory. Most of them survive on instinct instead of intelligence, anyway. And I wouldn't feel right testing this on a Nobody. Seriously, that just makes me rather uncomfortable. It'd be like me experimenting on Roxas.
Speaking of which, I did manage to talk to him. It took me a bit of effort, but I think it was worth it. He was kind of happy to see me. Or would that be hear me, since he didn't exactly see me? Oh well, same thing. I think it was because he was bored. I mean, really. Spending time in someone's head is boring if you can't look at the memories. But, to make up for it, he was able to talk to Sora a whole lot easier than I can talk to Kairi. I wish I could talk to Kairi without having to yell in her head and try to project myself at the same time. Maybe I can't because I'm just weird that way.
She bit her lip nervously, as she glanced at the boy in front of her. What could she do now? Sora –
…Sora? No, whoever he was, no matter how he acted, no matter what he looked like, he was – not – Sora. This person was mindless. Sora – it would be a shame to associate the boy in front of her as Sora. But what else could she call him?
What could she call herself? She wasn't Kairi, by any chance. But what else did she have…?
She shouldn't think about that now. She should put more thought into what she should do, where she would go. Because right now, there was nothing.
And right now, Sora - not Sora - was basically just a dead-weight. She had to drag him off the ground just to get him walking.
He wasn't going to help her, not at all.
"It won't take long," she said aloud, to herself and the boy she was leading. That's right. Look on the bright side. Every cloud has a silver lining.
Only, at this point, that cloud seemed more like a storm. She had no idea where she was going, no idea what she was even doing. What she wanted to do was to go back home. But there wasn't a home to go back to. Or at least, one that she could remember.
She sighed as she looked around. They had been walking for a while now. Hopefully, they would end up where there were actually people. There was no way she could unlock the gate she had woken up at, and either way, that would have ended up horribly.
No, wherever she was, she'd have to be responsible. Earn some munny, find a cheap place to stay, buy something to eat. Until then, she couldn't do what she wanted. And Sora…
Should she abandon him or what? It would be easier just to leave him, since he couldn't work for himself, and he would just be a waste of munny if she took him with her.
It would be so easy. All she would have to do was let go of his hand. Without her making sure he would follow her, he would wander away, or sit down. Once, she had almost left him behind before she realized that he wasn't there.
Still, she doubted that she would really do it. Even though she knew it wasn't Sora in her mind, she still wanted him to stay. Why would I want something like that? What makes Sora so important that I want someone who just looks like him with me? It was pathetic, really. Sora, you must have been someone special if I keep thinking I want you here.
The trees were beginning to become more sparse, and now there was more light coming in. She smiled. No more giant, dark, creepy forest. With any luck, they might end up in a town. Town, city, village, house, shed – she wouldn't be picky.
"Hey, I think we- oh no." Somehow, without her noticing, he had gotten away. She groaned. Who knows where she lost him? He could have been gone from the very beginning. It was going to take a long time to find him. If she could find him.
That wasn't a very nice thought.
Okay, okay, all she had to do was retrace her footsteps. When was the last time she remembered holding his hand?
Back into the trees. Back into the darkness. Back into the shadows.
The darkness came back, covering the ground. But no, they're only shadows.
Only shadows. Is someone here afraid of shadows?
She was being silly. All she had to do was step backward. She did it once, she should be able to do it again. She took a deep breath, and began to run.
Then the shadows came up, off the ground. Their beady eyes locked on to her, and they began to go forward.
"Sora!" she yelled. "Sora, where-" She stopped, in her tracks, once she caught sight of him.
Well. It seemed he was a little more useful than she thought.
Somehow, out of nowhere, he had gotten this giant key, and now he was using it to destroy the little shadows. Under the onslaught, they quickly began to disappear. Out of existence, into the darkness.
And she stood, as if stuck to the ground, just watching him. So this was the reason why he had left her behind. What was so important about the shadows, anyway?
…Were they supposed to attack me…?
He turned and smiled at her. A real smile, a grin that seemed to be impossibly wide. A nice change from the unmistakably blank expression he had on earlier.
Sora. Did he do this for me?
"Don't worry. I'll protect you."
Are you still in there? Am I… am I that important to you?
And then, as soon as the shadows stopped attacking, as soon as the key disappeared, he went back to normal. He went back to quiet, mindless, and emotionless.
She quite liked him better when he wasn't.
Hey, Sora –
I don't know if you can hear me, but we're in town. Funny, didn't even know there was a town!
Faintly, very faintly, he can hear the words.
So, I guess we're in it together now. Too bad you can't say anything. It'll be kind of boring. No conversation, really.
He would talk, but he's forgotten how.
I don't even know why I'm talking to you right now. It's a lot like I'm talking to myself, but a lot sillier.
Vaguely, he wonders what the words mean.
But I know you're in there somewhere. If that giant key is any indication.
'In there'. He wonders what it could possibly mean. And what the giant key is.
I'll get you out of there somehow, I promise!
Promise… what was that? He gladly drifts away, not to be troubled by words and their meanings.
He would forget about them the very next day.
That's it for today. I don't know, I kind of expected more…
But I'm really tired. I guess I put more effort into it than I thought. Mainly because I attempted to find Roxas's memories, too. Maybe I shouldn't be so curious.
It's weird, I didn't even think I could be this tired. It's enough for me to go right to sle….