Three Times Sam wanted to be like Dean and the one time he didn't
Dean age 6 Sam age 2
Baby Sammy was looking at his brother intently and was tracking Dean's movements with curious eyes.
"Hey Deano, get a move on it. You're gonna be late for school". John Winchester said.
"Okay Dad, I'm almost done", Dean said around a mouthful of Lucky Charms.
"Alright Sammy, time to get you fed. What's it gonna be today?" John looked at the jars of baby food in the cupboard. "How about some mashed peas or strained carrots?" John's choices were met with a grimace and a shake of the head from Sammy.
"No? What do you want to eat?" John asked.
Sammy pointed across the table to his big brother Dean. "ucky arms". Sam said.
Halloween Dean was 10 and Sam was 6
It was Halloween and for some reason this year, Dad was letting us go trick or treating. He was even springing for costumes at the local department store. I know exactly who I'm going to be. Batman! Sammy was going to be my sidekick, Robin.
"C'mon boys, lets head out to buy your costumes".
Sammy and I ran to the car excitedly and Dad drove us to the store.
When we got there Sam started with the questions. "Dean what are you going to be?"
"I'm going to be Batman", I answered.
"What am I going to be?" Sam asked.
"Well, you're going to be Robin".
" Who's Robin?"
"He's Batman's best friend and watches his back." I replied.
As we made our way towards the costumes, Sam said. "I don't want to be Robin, I want to be Batman too".
"No Sam, we can't both go as Batman".
"Just cause why? He looked up at me and his lower lip started to tremble. I wanna be Batman too, Dean. Pleeease...Dad, I wanna be Batman!"
Whenever Sam got like this, he usually got his way. I could never deny Sam anything. With a sigh, I said "Okay Sammy, you can be Batman too".
Sam gave me the biggest grin ever. "Thanks Dean!'"Later that night, two Batman clad kids went trick or treating.
Dean was 18 and Sam was 14
Sam sat on the couch pretending to read a book. But every so often he would look up to glance at his big brother. When Dean would look up, Sam would quickly pull his eyes down. After about the fifth time Dean caught Sam staring at him, Dean called him on it.
"Dude, quit staring at me. Take a picture it'll last longer."
"Don't flatter yourself, I wasn't staring at you."
After about another 5 minutes of Sam 'not staring' at Dean, Dean finally said "Spill it Sam. What's going on?"
Sam looked up but couldn't meet his brothers' eyes. "Umm I was just wondering...Well, I need."
"C'mon what's going on? You know you can tell me anything."
"Howdoyougetagirl to like you?", Sam asked in a rush. His eyes were still down and he hoped that Dean wouldn't start teasing him.
From the expression on Sam's face, Dean knew that Sam was embarrassed.
"Well, all you have to do is be yourself and I'm sure this girl will like you."
"I have been myself and she doesn't know that I 'm alive. Girls always seem to like you Dean. Tell me what I have to do."
Dean thought about it for a second and said "There's really no secret to it. Every girl is different. You have to let the girl know that you're interested. I know it's a cliché but all you really need to do is be yourself."
'Can I borrow your leather jacket?'
Dean grinned. "Sure, Sammy".
Dean was 22 and Sam was 18
Sam held it in his hands. He had that feeling in the pit of his stomach like he wanted to know but didn't. His whole future could change depending on what it said.
Sam took a deep breath and decided it was best just to get it over with. Like ripping off a band-aid. There was no sense prolonging it. With shaky hands he tore open the envelope. Another deep breath and he unfolded the piece of paper. His eyes scanned the page and he saw "Congratulations Sam Winchester, you have been accepted…". Sam read no further and with wobbly legs moved to sit on the couch.
He couldn't believe he had gotten accepted at Stanford! Stanford University! Sam's mind was spinning and he unfolded the letter again. This time he read slowly through the whole letter. With a contented sigh he closed his eyes and leaned back into the couch.
His eyes snapped open and he thought about Dean and his Dad's reaction. It was always assumed that once Sam finished high school he would join the family business. Nobody had bothered to ask Sam what he wanted (not that his Dad would have listened anyway). Joining the family business was the last thing Sam wanted. He just knew that his life was going to be different. He would get out, go to school, meet and marry a nice girl and have a normal life.
His Dad and Dean would be home soon. They had gone out on a supply run. If his Dad couldn't accept Sam's desire for a different life, Sam knew that Dean would. Dean had supported and encouraged Sam his whole life. While growing up Sam looked up to Dean (and still did) and wanted to be just like him. But there came a point that Sam realized he didn't want to be Dean. Hopefully, both Dad and Dean would understand. Besides, how bad could it be?