A/N: I wrote this oneshot in a couple hours to help get over writer's block on another story. The idea for this short fic came from watching a YouTube video, which has Optimus Prime and Megatron (both voiced by David Kaye) playing golf.
It's Tee Time
On a bright and pleasant day in the Earth Kingdom, the wind gently blew over several large green fields. Scattered amongst the fields were small streams, pools, and occasional pits of sand. From above the eighteen fields appeared to form a path through a forest. Parked at one end was a Fire Nation airship, reserved for Fire Lord Zuko's personal use. It was a perfect location and beautiful day for a quiet round of golf.
"Don't we have better things to do than play games?" Sokka complained.
"I thought you missed this kind of time wasting nonsense?" Katara retorted.
"Normally yes" Sokka replied. "But I'm kind of uncomfortable with her around."
Pointing towards the airship, Sokka referred to Azula. She was being escorted out of the airship by Zuko and Aang, making certain she didn't try anything. Even though the doctors at Azula's asylum reported excellent progress with her mental state, her recovery was far from over.
"Why'd we bring her along again?" Aang asked.
"Because Uncle thinks a nice game will be beneficial to her" Zuko replied.
"I have a name, boys" Azula complained. "Would it kill you to use it?"
"No, but you might" Suki responded, walking behind Azula.
"Can we get this game started already?" Toph asked, already standing at the first tee. Getting impatient, Toph decided to start the game early. She grabbed a metal club, metalbended it into a bigger club, and swung it as hard as she could. "FORE!" Toph yelled as she hit her green colored ball, sending it and a chunk of earth flying across the course.
"You're not supposed to hit the ground" Katara chastised.
"Whatever" Toph said, clearly dismissing Katara. "So where'd the ball land?"
Looking forward, Sokka spotted the chunk of earth that was thrown with Toph's ball. "You hit a tree" Sokka reported.
"My turn!" Aang shouted. He leapt into position with his white golf ball on a tee. Using a driver Aang hit the ball, sending it flying all the way to the green and stopping near the hole.
"Cheater!" Azula yelled. "There's no way the ball could get that far without airbending."
"Wait, we're playing without bending?" Toph questioned.
"It's only fair" Suki responded. She stepped up to the tee and used a 9 Iron to hit her light green ball. It landed in the fairway, halfway to the green.
"Not bad for a beginner" Zuko complemented. Placing his red ball on a tee, Zuko prepared for his shot. Using a 2 Wood he struck the ball, and it landed just outside the green.
"I can beat that" Sokka bragged. Using a 3 Iron Sokka hit his black ball. Everyone laughed when the ball landed only a quarter of the way down the course, and in a sand pit.
"FAIL!" Azula shouted. She placed her dark blue ball on a tee and hit it with the same 3 Iron Sokka used. The ball landed just behind Zuko's ball, earning her an annoyed grunt from Sokka.
"Just me left?' Katara asked. "Guess it's my turn" she said and placed a light blue ball on a tee. Using a 4 Wood she hit the ball, which landed in the rough near Toph's ball a third of the way down the course.
"So who's up next?" Toph asked.
"Sokka hits next, since he's furthest behind" Aang said.
While grumbling about being in last place, Sokka walked to the sand pit with a sand wedge. His ball was in the very center of the pit, seemingly mocking him. Once in the pit Sokka swung the club, hitting the ball out of the pit. He couldn't see where the ball went, but heard a splash in the distance.
"Water hazard, two points" Toph shouted.
"Oh come on!" Sokka yelled as he climbed out of the sand pit. He saw Katara and Toph standing next to a pool of water and walked up to them. Looking into the water, Sokka saw his ball resting at the bottom. "Katara, can you get it out of there please."
"No bending remember" Katara said, a smile on her face. "Go get it yourself."
Using a pair of clubs as awkward chopsticks, Sokka fished the ball out of the water. Meanwhile Katara and Toph hit their balls away from the woods, which landed just outside of the green. As they walked towards the others Sokka finished getting his ball out of the water, and prepared for his next shot.
With a 4 Iron in hand, Sokka swung it as hard as he could at his wet ball. It flew halfway across the course, and landed inside a group of trees. Even when there's nothing on the line, the Universe still hates me… Sokka thought as we walked towards his ball.
In the middle of the course, Suki was practicing her swing before hitting her ball. In the corner of her eye she saw Sokka walk by, heading for the trees further down the course. After a few swings Suki believed she was ready to send the ball all the way to the green. Using her 7 Iron, Suki struck the ball.
"OW!" Sokka screamed, having been hit in the head by Suki's golf ball. It had bounced off Sokka's head and rolled onto the fairway.
"Sorry!" Suki shouted.
Meanwhile, Zuko and Azula were waiting next to their respective golf balls. Getting impatient waiting for Sokka to get past their position, Azula decided to take her turn anyway. "FORE!" she yelled and hit her ball with a 3 Iron, and her ball landed inside the green and next to the hole.
"Beat that" Azula challenged.
"Alright" Zuko said. However he realized the club he had in hand wouldn't be right for the shot, and started looking through his golf bag. "Hey where's my 5 Iron?"
"I stole it!" Azula stated. "It's back at the airship."
"Why would you steal a golf club?" Zuko asked.
"Oh just to make you suffer" Azula confessed. "It's the little things that mean the most."
"Wonderful…" Zuko grumbled. He grabbed a 6 Iron and swung that at his golf ball. The ball landed just outside the green, on the other side.
Azula laughed at Zuko's misfortune. When she stopped she sighed and said "Guys suck at golf."
Walking towards their golf balls, Azula and Zuko passed by Katara and Toph. Using a 3 Iron Toph hit her ball gently enough to get it onto the green, stopping several feet from the hole. Katara used a Putter and a hard swing to get her ball onto the green as well, stopping two feet from the hole.
"Is Sokka still behind us?" Toph asked.
As if on cue Sokka's golf ball hit the ground in front of Toph and bounced towards the hole. The ball hit the flag marking the hole and bounced away from it, stopping at the edge of the green. Right when Sokka's ball stopped Suki's ball came in as well, stopping only a few inches from the hole.
"Everyone here?" Aang asked, having waited for everyone else to catch up with his position at the green. He noted that Suki's ball was now closest to the hole, followed by Katara's, Azula's, his own, Toph's, Sokka's and then Zuko's.
"Almost" Zuko said. Using a Putter he hit his ball hard enough to get it onto the green, stopping just slightly closer to the hole than Aang's ball.
"Your turn Sokka" Suki said.
"Let's see here, no sand pits, water hazards, or trees to get in the way now" Sokka commented. He carefully aimed with his Putter while Aang removed the flag from the hole. Sokka hit the ball, and it stopped just an inch from the hole.
"Man do you suck" Toph said. She hit her ball and it rolled straight into the hole. "Four points, and with Par 3 that's a bogey."
"Finally it's my turn again" Aang said. He hit his ball and it went straight into the hole. "Two shots, Par 3, I got a birdie."
"Well at least I can still tie with Toph" Zuko commented. He hit his ball towards the hole, but the ball drifted lazily to the left. It just barely missed the hole, but bounced off Sokka's ball and went into the hole. While Zuko marked down his score as a bogey, Sokka's ball rolled away from the hole.
"Oh for crying out loud!" Sokka yelled. His ball had stopped just an inch further from the hole than Azula's, making it his turn next. He hit his ball again, sending it towards the hole. Sokka's ball hit Suki's ball, and both of them entered the hole at the same time.
"Is that a legal move?" Suki asked.
"It is now" Katara said. "That makes Suki score a Par, and Sokka gets… 8? A quintuple bogey?"
"You know what, screw this game!" Sokka yelled. "I'm going back to the airship."
"I'm bored with this too" Suki said. She joined Sokka and they walked away from the course together.
"And I'm the one that's supposed to be insane" Azula commented while hitting her ball into the hole. "Par."
"Just mine left for the hole" Katara said. She hit her ball straight into the hole. "Bogey."
With the first hole finished, the remaining five players walked to the start of the next hole. Scattered over the fairway were dozens of pigeon-gulls, minding their own business. Each player set up their tee and everyone was ready for the next round.
"Hey let's make this more interesting" Azula suggested. "Bending Golf anyone?"
"Sure" Toph said. She bent the earth around her ball, encasing it within a sphere. Launching the ball with earthbending, Toph sent it flying across the fairway. The earth around the ball shattered over the green, dropping the ball onto the green just a few feet from the hole.
"Oh it is on!" Katara shouted. She hit her ball hard enough for it fly halfway across the fairway. However just before the ball landed Katara bent water out of a nearby hazard and spread it across the fairway, freezing it into ice. The ball hit the ice and bounced, then slid across the ice all the way to the green.
"My Turn!" Aang declared. He hit his ball and propelled it with airbending. The gust of wind spooked the pigeon-gulls into flight. Aang's ball struck one of the pigeon-gulls mid-flight, and both bird and ball fell to the ground on the fairway.
"Hah, a literal birdie" Azula commented.
Zuko couldn't help but laugh a little. Then he swung his club at his ball, and on impact the club and ball were set on fire. As the ball streaked through the air it left a trail of fire in its wake. But just before coming down Zuko's flaming ball was hit by a blue flaming ball, both exploding in the impact and raining fire over the green.
Azula laughed at the sight of her ball hitting Zuko's in mid-air. "Oh there's no way I could ever repeat that, even if I tried."
"Great, now I need a new golf ball" Zuko complained.
"I think that's the least of our worries" Katara said. She saw the embers from the flaming golf balls on the green, already setting it on fire. Flames spread across the grass, quickly reaching the fairway moving towards the tee.
"Crap!" Aang yelled. He bent water and sand from nearby hazards and threw them at the spreading fire, extinguishing the flames heading towards him. But the fire continued to spread in the other directions, requiring Aang to briefly enter the Avatar State to gain the power necessary to stop the fire from destroying the entire course.
Within minutes, over half a dozen holes were destroyed before the fire was contained. With their golf game ruined, everyone returned to the airship. Waiting outside the ship were Sokka and Suki, having their own private conversation. When Sokka spotted everyone else arriving, he held up a golf club.
"Someone missing a 5 Iron?" Sokka asked.
A/N: Well I hope you all got a few laughs out of this. If you did, please review.