Disclaimer: I'm not the owner of Fafner. Shocking, isn't it?

Author's note: This is just a little idea that came to mind based on some lines the Fafner: Heaven and Earth song 'Fortunes' (which is ment to be from Kazuki's point of view) where he talks about seeing illusions of Soushi during the day, and hearing his voice in his ear as he tries to sleep.

So, basically, here's a short story about Kazuki missing Soushi, set just before the start of HaE.


Kazuki let a sigh escape him as he stood before his bed that night. He was so tired - not just physically, but mentally, too. So tired of everything. And he knew, he knew that it would happen again as soon as he tried to drift off to sleep. He'd hear his voice, whispering to him temptingly.

It was bad enough during the day; at school, at Alvis, at the cafe. It was so hard to put on a brave face and just pretend that he was alright, that he was starting to heal and move on. Though sometimes Kazuki got the impression that Fumihiko could see through his facade of cheerfulness. He understood, after all, the pain of losing someone precious, the deep longing to see them again, but never knowing if they would. Did he hear his son crying himself to sleep at night? If so, he never mentioned it, and for that Kazuki was grateful.

This island, once again a paradise to so many people, felt empty to him; looking dull and hazy through his assimilated eyes. And then he would close his eyes... and he could see him, just standing there like a spectre, watching him, glowing with an almost ethereal light, his own pretty grey eyes filled with sadness, and looking sadder by the day...

Kazuki slipped into the bed, fumbling around for the covers and pulling them up to his shoulders, burying his face against the pillow and swallowing back the sob that threatened to burst from his throat. It was only at this time, when he was finally alone, that Kazuki could let his walls down and wallow in the grief that piled up during the day. But now he was even haunting him during this time, too.

Kazuki didn't even flinch as he felt someone settling down on the bed beside him. And then warm breath tickled against his ear.


Kazuki shuddered and felt the tears start to fall. "Soushi..." he choked out, longing to roll over and find the other boy next to him, to find him solid and warm and real. But... he knew that if he opened his eyes and looked, he would find nothing.

"Kazuki, I'm here," that dearly missed voice whispered. And then he could feel warm arms embracing him, and soft lips against his ear, "Trust me."

Kazuki grit his teeth, squeezing his eyes even tighter shut, trying to ignore it. Why must he torment him like this? So near, and yet so far... He longed to believe Soushi's words so much, but he'd been waiting for such a long time that he'd just about given up hope. He felt like he was slowly going crazy, going through life like a ghost himself. Waiting, just waiting...

"I miss you. I need you. Please come back," Kazuki whispered brokenly, pushing back against the warmth, no longer caring if he was hallucinating or not. He just needed to be close to him.

"I will soon. Please trust me." Soushi's voice sounded rough, as though he was crying himself.

"Soushi..." Kazuki reached out his hand to Soushi's. He needed to touch him, to prove that he was really here, that this wasn't just a dream. For a split-second his hand brushed against smooth skin. And then Kazuki's eyes snapped open.

He was alone.

"Soushi!" Kazuki sobbed loudly, curling in on himself and burying his head in his hands. His heart tightened painfully. Soushi wasn't here. It wasn't fair. He always felt so real, but then...

He brought his hand up to where Soushi's face had been pressed against his hair and neck. It felt... wet.

Kazuki quickly pulled his hand back and stared at it in shock, the wetness seemed to shimmer slightly in the dark. 'Soushi's tears...?' His eyes suddenly hardened, and he clenched his fist. "No, it can't be. It must just be... sweat or something. It can't be Soushi's. He doesn't exist any more... "he whispered the last part bitterly.

"Kazuki... Kazuki..."

"Soushi..." Kazuki murmured back, letting Soushi's voice lull him to sleep. In the end, all he could do was wait.

The end. Poor emo Kazuki. Hurry up and come back to him, Soushi!

Man, I can't wait to watch Heaven and Earth.