A/N: This is the last part. I think the title explains all you need.





Avengers vs. the Hiccups

Loki cackled madly as he flew just out of Iron Man's reach. He laughed loudly as he effortlessly avoided the repulsor blasts, howled as Stark cursed at him.


Oh, Godsdammit! Of all the fucking times to-


Loki sighed and teleported himself behind Iron Man. He wrapped his arms and legs around the steel body, clinging to his back with a pout.

"What the Hell are you doing?" Stark demanded, twisting this way and that to get him off.

Loki clung to regardless of his efforts. "It's safer here." he explained morosely.

"Safer from what? And why?"


A gigantic dragon appeared before the pair and roared at them.

"That's why." Loki dead-panned.

Stark screamed, and fired his repulsors.


"Um. Tony, are you aware you have a trickster on your back?" Stave asked hesitantly, staring as the suit made its wobbly way towards them. As soon as Iron Man's feet were on the ground, he fell flat against it, Loki jumping nimbly to the side.

"Tony?" Steve hurried to his side, casting small glares at the trickster. Loki shrugged and took a step back, turning to look at his brother.

"Thor. How's your romantic interest in Mjolnir doing these days?"

"Be silent, brother, and speak of what you have done to Tony Stark."

Iron Man mumbled something into the ground, and twitched his armored legs.

"Yo, Stark, you okay?" Hawkeye asked, not lowering the bow he had aimed at Loki.

Steve said the emergency override, and the armor disassembled itself, leaving Tony laying on the ground, blinking blearily at the dirt. "This bed is so not comfy." he muttered, shifting around. "I need a pillow."

The Avengers blinked as one.

"Are you drunk?" Jan asked, crossing her arms. "Tony, how could you?"

"He doesn't smell of alcohol." Steve grasped the smaller man underneath the arm-pits and lifted him off the ground. Tony dangled in the air, and giggled. "I'm tall." he declared, and hiccuped.

Loki agreed with his own hiccup. "I might have done that, sorry."

Thor twitched, and raised Mjolnir to shield his face. "Brother. No."

Loki gave his an exasperated look. .~hiccup~. He promptly shifted into his Jotunn form.

Hank raised a scientific eyebrow. "Thor, would you care to explain?"

.~hiccup~. Hawkeye's arrow turned into a very large noodle.

"My brother's magic grows out of control when he hiccups." Thor explained, hunching down protectively. To the side, Hawkeye cursed, and reached for another arrow. Not finding one, he upended his holster, cursing louder when only broth came out.

"Shouldn't we find shelter then?" Steve asked, cradling a bleary eyed Tony against his chest.

"No shelter is enough." Thor said.

.~hiccup~. With a loud CRUNCH, a hole in the ground bigger than the Grand Canyon appeared near them.

Hawkeye blinked. "Maybe he should drink some water."

"NO!" Thor cried, crouching low to the ground.

The Avengers stared at him. Loki chuckled.

"Okay." Jan said slowly, taking a step away from the Thunder God. "Have you tried holding your breath?"

Loki shook his head, and took a deep breath. A minute passed. Two minutes. Thor felt hope swelling in his chest.


Hank's hair turned into an impressive green afro.

"That is not your color." Jan commented after a moment, pursing her lips to hide her snigger.

"Yes, we should definitely find a way to cure this." Hank muttered, touching his hair gingerly, as if afraid it'd bite him.


The Eiffel Tower now stood near the new Grand Canyon.

"And fast." Steve agreed.


"That is fascinating." Dr. Strange commented, eying Loki's fluctuating magical field. "And this happens every time you hiccup?"

"Sometimes he just shape-shifts." Thor offered from his hiding place behind the sofa.

"Interesting. And how do you normally control this?"

"Odin used to spell me not to have hiccups at all." Loki said, twirling his new tail in annoyance. "It wears off every few centuries."

"Can you duplicate it?" Steve asked anxiously. He tried not to shift as the thong that used to be his costume pinched uncomfortably. "Or reverse the effects, possibly?"

"Oh, I can duplicate it." Strange picked up a moldy tome, opening it. "Just give me a moment to find the right spell."


The sofa Thor was hiding behind opened its eyes, mewled pitifully and run away.

"Ah, here we go." Strange weaved the spell around Loki, watching as it settled against his diaphragm, stilling its spasms. "There. That should hold for a year."

Hawkeye groaned. "Only a year?"

"Maybe more, maybe less, depends how the spell reacts to prolonged exposure to Loki's magic."

The trickster nodded his understanding, and waved his hand, reversing the changes his hiccups had caused.

Steve sighed in relief at the return of his costume, Thor stopped cowering, and Hawkeye hugged his arrows. Tony continued to nap in Strange's armchair, though in a less passed out manner, and Hank grinned when he could once again touch the top of his head.

"There, done. Now if you'll excuse me, I have nefarious things to plan."

"Of course." Dr. Strange nodded amicably. "Drop by when the spell wears off again, I'll be happy to repeat it."

"We appreciate it." Thor said gratefully.

"Anytime." Dr. Strange looked at Loki, and chuckled. "Though I have to admit, for somewhat your age, your magic does behave rather... immaturely."

Loki glared at him, and snapped his fingers.

Dr. Strange promptly hiccuped, and his cabinet exploded.

Loki grinned darkly. "Enjoy." he dead-panned, and vanished.