Hello, everyone. I'm Aubrey, and this is my first time in this fandom. I've been a fan since January of 2011 (aka. This year) and have always found Azula one of the most interesting characters (Zuko's top, but I'm not getting into that right now). Her motivations, and her slow unraveling at the end, starting at the Boiling Rock, has fascinated me.
I wrote this while stalling for time on my American Dragon fic sequel. Any of those readers: Don't worry, I am working on it. I'm trying, very hard. I'm just having a bit of trouble with a part in the middle. I will have it up by the end of this month.
Anyway, enjoy the fic, and please review. I would really like to know what you guys think.
Fact 1: Azula Always Lies
Azula has always prided herself on being able to tell lies. She tells them everyday, about even the most trivial of things (just because she can). She tells lies about where she was, what she was doing, and who she was with.
She spreads lies about other people; her older brother, Zuko (the weakling, mommy's boy crown prince, she sneers in her mind) her friends, Ty Lee and Mai. She lies about the broken vase on the floor, saying it was a servant (they're expendable, anyway). She lies to her mother, her father, her brother, her friends, her enemies, her servants.
She even lies to herself. She says she's invincible, un-crackable. She's the unmovable rock. She's the perfect one; the one who doesn't make mistakes. She convinces herself that she is unbeatable; no one has her skills, no one but her father (and worthless uncle) can manipulate lightning like she can. She wields blue fire. She is a firebending prodigy. She is the best.
She is Azula, and Azula always lies.
Fact 2: Azula's is a Daddy's Girl
Azula knows that she is her father's daughter. Her weak brother is the product of her mother, the one who shows emotions and feels pity and love and joy. Azula scoffs at those emotions and sits at her father's feet, reveling in the feeling of power (just sitting at the Firelord's feet brings this feeling to her). She rejects love in favor of fear, joy in favor of hate, and pity in favor of apathy. She is a perfect soldier, a perfect daughter. She will not let her father down.
Her father always favored her. He went to her exhibitions and her duels. He showed pride that she was the first in two hundred years to have the blue fire. She was the youngest person alive to master lightning. She was cold, and ruthless. She was the perfect molding her father sculpted her into. And he loved her, in his own, cruel way.
So when her father asks her to capture her brother and uncle, she accepts willingly. When he tells her to stay and rule over her people, instead of coming with him, she stays (though she doesn't want to). She always strived to make her father proud, and in return he graced her with the rare smile, the exceedingly rare, "Well done, daughter." So she sweats and strives and works herself half to death, because she is her father's daughter, and by god, she will make her father proud of her.
She is Azula, and Azula is a Daddy's Girl.
Fact 3: Azula always wins.
Azula has only lost three matches in her entire life. It was her main source of pride. Her deadly accuracy, cool logic, and cold demeanor has either scared her opponents witless (allowing her to beat them with ease) or has instantly won her the match.
The first time she lost was to her teacher, the first time she ever dueled. She used dirty tricks and firebending she picked up from her father to defeat him the next time. She never lost to him again.
The second was to an Admiral's daughter who she had insulted during her time at the Royal Fire Academy for Girls. The daughter was promptly sent home three days later, terrified and shaking and refusing to talk.
The third was to her father. He beat her down ruthlessly and snarled in her face. "You'll have to do better than that, princess." She never faced him again (for she is her father's daughter, and she is supposed to let him win, she tells herself. Her pride would not allow herself to be beaten a second time.).
As her mind slowly unravels, she begins recounting these three fights over and over in her head, their mocking voices ringing in her ears day after day.
"Not good enough, Princess."
"Not fast enough, I see."
"What's the matter? Too afraid to let yourself go?"
"You'll have to do better than that, princess."
Zuko had never been able to beat her. It was a fact of life. She was strong, and her brother was weak. She aimed to incapacitate or kill; he aimed to stop or minimally injure. She was a prodigy; he was a worthless boy.
Azula always wins. She never backs down from a challenge, she never lets her eyes leave her enemy, and she never, ever, lets anyone beat her.
So when she loses, it destroys the last small grip on sanity she has left. She goes mad. She is no longer aware of what is happening around her, or what she is doing; all she knows is that she is beaten. She has lost, and that is too much for her to handle. She writhes around, trying desperately to break free of the chains that bind her so she can show that filthy peasant girl who she's dealing with.
But the chains hold fast, and she collapses in exhaustion, weeping. She has lost. Her pride is gone. She has nothing left. She is worthless, and that, more than anything else, makes her give up and surrender.
She has lost, and in the end, that's all that matters.
She is Azula, and she has lost everything.