Ain't No Mountain High Enough
Set after the events of Countdown
Castle groaned as he heard the familiar ringtone signifying that Beckett was calling him. He felt like he had just closed his eyes and he was reluctant to open them again. Pulling his arm out from under the covers, Castle reached for his phone, which was somewhere on his bed side table. After 3 attempts he finally grasped his phone and pulled it under the covers.
"Beckett if the world is ending again, I am seriously too tired to care."
When Castle was met with silence, he pulled himself up and out from under the covers. Oh no, was Beckett in trouble? Great, Beckett was in trouble and he was acting like a Dick!
"Sorry Castle, I shouldn't have called. Bye."
Silence met his ears again.
Castle pulled his phone away from his ear and looked at the screen. She had hung up on him. Damn. Castle swung his legs to the ground and was thankful he hadn't put his clothes away, like Alexis always nagged him to do. He had come home and simply stripped off by his bed and had crawled in. After facing death, facing his daughter about dirty clothes was a walk in the park. Pulling on his pants Castle dialled Beckett's number. He grabbed his shirt with his free hand and with his phone sandwiched between his shoulder and ear, attempted to put it on.
"Go back to sleep Castle, I'm sorry."
"No I'm awake now, what's wrong?"
One sleeve on. One to go.
"Nothing's wrong exactly. I just. I just don't feel right."
"Wake Josh up, get him to take you to the hospital. You could be having complications from being in the freezer."
His shirt was on, buttons be damned. He needed his shoes and jacket and he needed to get to Beckett.
"Wake. Josh. Up?" she asked rather tentatively.
Castle stopped shoe halfway on. "He stayed over right?"
He heard Beckett expel a breath of air. "He was going to. I mean he wanted to, it's just. When we went back to my place something just didn't feel right."
Castle's jaw dropped open then closed as his thoughts were on putting on his other shoe and running out of his room.
"Didn't feel right how" he asked running down the stairs trying not to trip. That's the last thing he needed.
"Oh I don't know. He hugged me. He's my boyfriend, a hug should make me feel safe and warm but it didn't. I just felt cold, so cold and kind of empty. Having his arms around me made me shiver, and not in a good way."
Grabbing his coat off the couch Castle ran to the door then stopped. He could hear something unusual going on in the background of Becketts call.
"He noticed me being standoffish and we got into a fight. He got a call to go in and I told him to go."
Castle knew he was going to hell for feeling elated over the fact that Beckett and Dr Motorcycle boy had a fight, but at this moment he didn't care. The strange noise in the background still bothered him. At first it sounded like she had the TV on, but then it hit him, traffic noise. In the city that never sleeps there was always traffic noise. The only time he noticed the fact that it was even there, was when he wasn't in the city.
"Beckett, where are you?"
Beckett didn't answer straight away.
"Ahh look its late. I shouldn't have called."
"No Beckett, wait!"
He looked at his phone and noticed for the second time that night she had hung up in him.
Castle ran from his place and soon found himself on the street. He looked up and down. He had a small glimmer of hope that Beckett was out on the street because she was coming to see him. He ran down the street a little and then spotted the back side he spent way too much time looking at.
"Beckett" Castle yelled out, running towards the lone figure on the street. He watched her stop and turn around but he continued running until he reached her.
"Castle, how the" Beckett shook her head trying to figure out how Castle knew she had been standing outside his place.
Castle held up his index finger to indicate for her to wait for just 1 minute. He then leaned forward and placed his hands on his knees and took a few deep breaths. He soon righted himself but still puffed just a little.
"Beckett. What are you doing here?"
Beckett raked a hand through her hair.
"I dunno Castle. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't get warm."
"So naturally you come and stand outside my apartment in the middle of the night."
Beckett looked away from him.
"I feel numb Castle, on the inside and out. I came here because" Beckett bit her lip and looked at the ground. She took a deep breath before peering up at him from under her lashes.
"I came here to feel something Castle. Before you came along, my life was empty and you fill my life with" Beckett rubbed her hand over her face trying to summon up the right word.
"Annoyance" Castle offered.
Beckett laughed. "Yes annoyance, and right now annoyance is better than nothing."
Castle held out his arms. "Well you came to the right place. Come on" He beckoned her.
With Castles arm around her shoulders, Beckett retraced the steps she had taken only moments before and walked back to Castles place. Castle opened the door for her and she was hit in the face by a blast of hot air.
"Martha and Alexis don't mind it being so hot in here."
"There not here."
Beckett turned surprised.
"I sent them away to the Hamptons, this time they listened. I thought I might go and join them, seeing how we don't have to be back a work for a few days. I'll wait and see how I feel in the morning. Either way it seemed pointless getting them to drive back tonight, once everything was ok."
Beckett nodded and then turned back to the open room. She was here now. She was here in Castles place. The place she had been thinking about since Josh had left.
Now she was lying to herself. She wanted to be here while Josh was still at her place.
"Would you like something to drink. Not coffee, but some water maybe or I could make hot chocolate with whipped cream on top."
Beckett shook her head. "No I'm fine, could we sit."
Castle gestured towards the couch. "Sure make yourself at home."
Beckett walked towards the couch and chose to sit in the middle. She kicked off her shoes and then scooped up the blanket that was sitting next to her. Lightly throwing the blanket over herself Beckett laid back and closed her eyes.
"I could turn up the heat some more."
Not opening her eyes Beckett shook her head. Pulling the blanket over her had been more about security rather than warmth.
"I guess you don't wanna talk about it."
Beckett opened her eyes and looked at him giving him an almost guilty smile.
"No not really."
Castle nodded. "That's ok. Is there anything you want or need? I could put a movie on or something."
"Maybe some music."
"Music" Castle asked surprised.
Beckett nodded. "Just softly."
Castle patted his hands over his body trying to remember where he had put his phone, once Beckett had hung up on him for the second time. He located his phone and then walked over to the dock on the bookshelf. He set his phone down and then began to scroll through it.
"The music from the folder 'Alone' would be nice."
Castle looked over his shoulder at her with a raised eyebrow.
"And I thought I was the snoop out of the two of us."
Beckett shrugged. "What can I say, I learn from the best."
Castle chuckled before turning back to his phone and selecting the folder Beckett wanted to listen to. He wanted to know exactly when Beckett had been snooping through his phone and exactly how much she had seen. Ryan and Esposito hadn't hassled him about his choice in music, so either she had just recently discovered it or she was keeping this secret for herself. Castle turned back to face Beckett sitting on his couch under a blanket. She looked so small and timid, so very unlike Beckett. He had to do something to get her back to her old self.
"So you admit that I am the best at something huh."
Castle watched a smile tugged at Becketts lips.
"Yes. At snooping, and coming up with strange theories that somehow actually turn out to be true."
"And being annoying" Castle added.
Beckett nodded. "Like right now. Are you going to stand there all night or are you going to sit down."
She watched as Castle made his way over to the couch across from her. He was going to sit away from her and she didn't want that. She had come here to feel comforted and she couldn't get that if he was sitting so far away.
"Castle, you don't have to sit all the way over there."
Castle butt hit the couch then rebounded back up as if he had just sat on a spring.
"I thought you might want some space. You said you didn't want Josh touching you, I just figured that meant you wouldn't want anyone near you. After two failed marriages and living with two woman, I've learned an important lesson. If you want to live to see the next day, you give them space when they need it."
"Wise words to live by, but they don't apply here."
Beckett lifted up the edge of the blanket and patted the space beside her. Castle sat, and pulled the blanket over the two of them. She noticed that he sat just far enough away that their bodies weren't touching.
"I'm sorry for waking you."
Beckett watched as Castle shrugged but smiled. "It's no big deal. That's what partners are for."
Beckett scoffed. "So being partners' means if I can't sleep, you can't sleep."
Castles small smile faded to a frown.
"No and please correct me if I am wrong. To me being partners' means no matter how big or small the problem is, no matter whether its day or night, we can pick up the phone and the other will come running, no questions asked."
Beckett stared at Castle but didn't say anything.
"I guess that sounds stupid right. I've over fictionalised it. In my make believe world of writing that's what partners should be, but I guess as a cop you know different."
A smile twinged to her lips.
"Mainly it means having each others' back, usually just when were on duty though. I'm glad you think differently. I'm still sorry I woke you though."
"I few extra hours of beauty sleep isn't going to help this face out much."
Becketts' eyes roamed over his face. He really was ruggedly handsome. Although she had once told him he was so metro sexual, it was more of a jibe than the truth. It was obvious he spent at least some time in front of the mirror. His hair was mussed over his forehead, were as it normally hung either side exposing his furrowed brow. So apart from grooming his hair, something as far as she was concerned more men needed to spend time doing, Josh included, he didn't look plucked and polished. His eyes were his best feature however. Eyes were often called the windows to the soul, this was defintly the case with Castle. His eyes held knowledge, courage and cockiness, but right now they held uncertainty.
"Aren't you always saying you're ruggedly handsome?"
"Yeah, but I say a lot of things. You can testify that they are not always true! Besides if me losing a few hours beauty sleep, means helping you, so you can get the sleep you need, than it's a small sacrifice."
Beckett smiled. Castle was willing to sacrifice his own needs for her. It was a total selfless act, and then a thought hit her.
"Hey hold on a second, are you saying I need my beauty sleep?"
Castles eyes softened. "Like it'd possible for you to get anymore beautiful"
Beckett stared at Castle. Did he just openly admit he thought she was beautiful? He wasn't joking around or being a flirt. He hadn't called her hot or sexy, he had called her beautiful. There was something so pure about it, he was being so open and honest and sincere. Their eyes were locked on to each other's and the uncertainty that was there only moments ago was replaced by heat. The title of Castles second book came to mind. She had never understood the term Naked Heat until now. The heat in his eyes as he stared at her face warmed her entire body. She could feel again. She wasn't cold or empty or dead. She was alive in more ways the one because of the man sitting before her. Beckett couldn't help but take a deep breath and swallow deeply. The small movement shook Castle out of his reverie and had him turning away. Beckett bit her lip and looked away too, the moment was gone.
As Beckett felt the heat slipping from her she knew she had to act now. However she couldn't face him, the one time in her life where she was actually chicken. What she was about to do could have a disastrous outcome. Lifting one leg she tucked it under herself before turning her back slightly to Castle. Maybe she didn't need to face, maybe she could say what she needed to say and not see his reaction. It was now or never.
"Castle if I ask you to do something for me, will you do it and not make a big deal over it. I mean if you don't want to do it, it's ok but can you not make a big deal about me asking."
Beckett felt Castle move on the couch beside her. Butterflies had somehow entered her stomach, even though she couldn't see if he was moving towards her or away.
"I'd do anything for you Beckett"
He must have moved closer as Beckett swore she felt his breath against the right side of her neck. She closed her eyes enjoying the sensation. Oh God why did that feel so good? Taking another deep breath Beckett readied herself for a potential disaster.
"Will you hold me?"
Nothing happened. There was no movement on the couch, no sound except for the melodious piano music. Beckett's eyes flew open and her shoulders sagged. She shouldn't have asked. She shouldn't have come. God she was such an idiot. What must Castle think of her? If he has that cocky grin on his face she swore she would shoot him.
She was about to rise when she felt a hand touch her right hip and then slowly make its way around her stomach. Feeling herself being tugged backwards Beckett relaxed and allowed her body to go willingly. When her back hit Castles chest she felt the heat return immediately. This was what she wanted; this was what she came here for. She knew it was wrong on so many levels but at this point she didn't care. She nestled into his body and felt him rest his head on her own. Was it possible that he needed this as much as she did? The time for questions wasn't now. All she wanted to do is sit, there in Castles arms for the next hundred years or so.
Authors Note: I'd like to thank all of those who read and reviewed my first Castle fan fic. Strange, Weird and Wonderful. Especially bones 35 for trying to help me with my grammar. Also Little Lizzie Zentara who's detailed review made me go back and read my own story to re live all the good things she talked about. I was really worried about writing again after being out of the game for so long. All your kind words has spurred me to write more, so thank you. And please write a review for this one to.
I'm not sure if I am simply going to leave this story where it is. I have a few ideas for a few chapters but no real destination in mind. So if anyone feels like giving me some ideas or tips or if anyone feels like collaborating feel free to message me. Thanks all.
I is who I is