LbN: Two of my favorite songs EVER in this chapter. If Finn & Kurt ever really did this duet on the show, I would totally die happy. :) Happy reading!


"You are beautiful, no matter what they say. Words can't bring you down…"

"Mercedes did that already."

"I know. It's not my lullaby. I just can't resist—she's gorgeous."

"Yeah. It was cool of Nana Judy to get all of us cameras," Finn said, pointing his at Kurt.

"The joys of a messy divorce…" Kurt mused. "Plus, she wants pictures of her granddaughter. Quinn said she's taken up scrapbooking as well as dancing. Now, put it down and practice."

"Kurt, this ridic—"

"You're not changing her until I'm sure you won't drop her. Practice."

Finn glared at him, but picked up the baby doll and carefully rearranged its clothes. "There," he said. "That's the fifteenth wardrobe change for the doll. Can I please hold her now?"

Kurt smiled at him. "Your soft side is showing."

"Just give me the kid."

The younger teen gently passed the baby over. "Have you thought of your lullaby?"

Finn didn't answer as he rocked Beth. He seemed to be in his own world.

Kurt put a hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry. Is this hard for you? I could call Judy to come get her."

"No. I'm fine," Finn said, finally looking up. "I just… whenever I see her—whenever I help Puck watch her… I kind of miss the daddy feelings, you know? Not the panicky, scared feelings, but the whole "she's mine" thing. Sorry, that makes no sense…."

"Makes perfect sense. Tell you what… I'm going to put the kettle on—"

"You're not British, Kurt," Finn said with a small smile.

"And while I do that," Kurt continued, ignoring him. "You sing whatever's on your mind to Beth." He squeezed his stepbrother's shoulder and left quietly.


"What the fuck all over the place?" Quinn asked, a little too loudly. Other moms glared at her, but she didn't care. This was easily the most frightening experience she'd ever had; next to telling her parents she was pregnant. "Rachel…what?"

"It's the American Girl collection!" Rachel said excitedly. "I loved the dolls, and I know you used to read the books, so I thought we'd check it out!"

Reading the books and being in a three-story building full of dolls were two different animals, in Quinn's humble opinion. They'd done the tour, which had been kind of cool, but now they were in the actual store. Lining the walls were HUNDREDS of dolls that you could choose from to match you. Dolls of every hair color, eye color, and skin color combination stared down at her. Quinn knew she was crazy, but she couldn't shake the feeling that the dolls were plotting something. She shivered.

"We should get one for Beth," Rachel said, contemplating part of the blonde/blue-eyed section.

"But…er…she's just a baby. We should get one when she's a bit older, you know? Wait to see what she looks like at…er…doll age. We could even bring her here." That was a bit of a stretch. She wasn't opposed to getting Beth a doll, but she was never setting foot in here again if she could help it. "Let's go down to the café," she suggested. "They had some kind of caramel biscotti that looked amazing."


Kurt had no intention of wasting his expensive, but delicious, cherry blossom white tea on Finn. The older boy would just make faces as he drank it, and that really sort of ruined the experience for Kurt. No, he'd just needed an excuse to step out and listen to Finn's lullaby. Brotherly snooping was a habit that both of them had picked up quickly. He sat on the stairs and listened as Finn began to sing.

Of all the things I believed in
I just want to get it over with
Tears form behind my eyes
But I do not cry
Counting the days that pass me by

I've been searching deep down in my soul
words that I'm hearing are starting to get old
It feels like I'm starting all over again
The last three years were just pretend
And I said...

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold onto

I still get lost in your eyes
And it seems that I can't live a day without you
Closing my eyes
And you chase my thoughts away
To a place where I am blinded by the light
But it's not right

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
Oh, woah

And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time
I want what's yours and I want what's mine
I want you
But I'm not giving in this time

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything that I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold onto

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold onto
The one thing that I tried to hold onto

And when the stars fall I will lie awake
You're my shooting star

There was silence for a minute, then Kurt heard.

"I know you're there, Kurt."

Smiling sheepishly, he walked back into his room. "Sorry."

"No you're not," Finn said, but he was smiling back. "Well?"

"I love the song, and you're awesome at it."

"But?"

"I feel like you're sort of doing a tribute to Beth, and it shouldn't be so mournful."

"Well…there is one other one I had in mind. But I'd need your help with it." He handed Beth to Kurt and rummaged in his backpack. He pulled out a severely crumpled few sheets of paper. "It's a duet called If I Never Knew You."

"From Pocahontas?"

"Er…yeah. I wasn't watching—"

"No judgement…."

Finn rolled his eyes. "Want to try it?"

"So long as it's understood that I get Shanice's part."

"Of course."

If I never knew you, if I never felt this love
I would have no inkling of how precious life can be
And if I never held you, I would never have a clue
How at last I find i
n you, the missing part of me.
In this world so full of fear, full of rage and lies
I can see the truth so clear, in your eyes, so dry your eyes
And I'm so grateful to you, I'd have lived my whole life through
Lost forever, if I never knew you.

If I never knew you, I'd be safe but half as real
Never knowing I could feel a love so strong and true
I'm so grateful to you, I'd have lived my whole life through
Lost forever, if I never knew you.

I thought our love would be so beautiful
Somehow we make the whole world right
I never knew that fear and hate could be so strong
All they leave are worthless whispers in the night
But still my heart is saying we were right.

If I never knew you
There is no moment I regret
If I never knew this love
Since the moment that we met
I'd have no inkling of how precious life can be
If our time's auspicious as that
Is here at last.

I thought our love would be so beautiful
So beautiful...
Somehow we make the world right
I thought our love would be so beautiful
We turn the darkness into light
And still my heart is saying we were right.

We were right
And if I never knew you

If I never knew you
I'd have lived my whole life through
Empty as the sky
Never knowing why
Lost forever
If I never knew you

"I like it," Kurt said softly.

"Me too. Come on, let's get some pictures of Beth for Quinn and Rachel."


"Hey Rach! We got an email from Kurt."

"Beth's First Fashion Show?" Rachel asked, peeking over Quinn's shoulder. "I'm not sure I even want to know."

Quinn began opening pictures, and laughing hysterically. There was Beth, dressed as Lady Gaga, Woodstock (from the Peanuts comics), Arwen—complete with Lord of the Rings-esque sword, every member of KISS (which, Kurt noted, was Finn's idea), Hermione Granger, a flower, a ladybug, a kitten, and (Quinn and Rachel's favorite) corn on the cob.

"Well…at least they're keeping her entertained…." Rachel said, wiping tears of laughter away.

"They're keeping themselves entertained," Quinn corrected, smiling brightly. "I'm going to email them back and ask how many of those costumes she spit up on…."