Title: What Would You Do If This Happened To You?
Rating: T – I guess.
Disclaimer: I don't own these characters.
Warnings: Homophobia, a little language…I think that's about it! It's sort of AU…but it could happen.
This story was inspired by an unfortunate interaction that TheFirstMrsHummel had with a homophobe. May it never happen again, my sweet.
What Would You Do If This Happened To You?
Carole was just leaving the market. She had already gone to the bank, the post office, and the dry cleaners. She was ready to go home and have some alone time with her husband while the boys were away at a competition for New Directions. As she walked briskly to her car, she noticed a woman heading toward her with a smile.
"Hello!" called the woman brightly.
Carole looked behind her, wondering to whom that woman was speaking. No one was behind Carole, and she turned back toward the smiling stranger who was headed straight toward her. Carole squinted at the stranger wondering if they'd perhaps met somewhere before and Carole should remember her.
"Hi," Carole said as the woman approached.
"I just wanted to tell you that I love your dress. It's really pretty! Where did you get it?"
"Thanks," Carole responded, getting a weird vibe from this woman, but not really knowing why. "I got it at a festival."
"Oh! Which festival?" the stranger asked.
Carole wasn't about to lie, but she did back away just a little bit from this woman.
"I got it at Pridefest."
The woman's face shifted from sweet and smiling to disgusted and appalled. In the world's snottiest, most condescending voice ever, the woman declared "I hope you'll just think about what's Biblical."
And THAT'S when inspiration struck.
Years ago Carole remembered one of her friends telling her about being accosted outside of a grocery store by someone trying to invite her, rather forcefully, to a church that she had no interest in attending. Carole's friend had felt incredibly uncomfortable, and Carole had wondered, while comforting her shaken friend, what she would have done if she were ever in a similar situation. She'd thought about it, and thought about it, and she'd ultimately come up with a plan. Now was her chance to put it into action. She knew what she had to do. She could hardly wait to stretch her acting skills and give it a try.
Dropping her head toward her chest, Carole bit her lip, doing her very best to strike a pose that said "CONTRITION!" She looked up shyly at the woman and said, "You know, I'd love to hear more about what the Bible has to say…about a lot of things."
She took a small step forward, and tilted her head to the right, going for coy, hoping that she was nailing this.
"Maybe we could go somewhere…quiet…and…umm…talk for awhile?" She smiled slowly and batted her eyelashes just a little bit.
She took another small step toward the woman, who took a tiny step away from Carole.
Carole was beginning to have fun. She put her index finger into her mouth and bit down on it gently while tilting her head and looking at the woman from underneath lowered eyelashes.
Removing her finger from her mouth, Carole asked "Wouldn't you like to go somewhere…more…intimate where we could…talk?" Carole drawled with, what she hoped was a sexy purr.
The woman was starting to look lightly terrified, and she couldn't seem to figure out what to say.
"Are you always this cute when you get angry?" Carole asked. She was willing to do this for as long as it took. She was having a blast, and she was going to win. She leaned toward the woman, reaching out toward her using the finger that she'd just had in her mouth, and that marked the end of the stranger's ability to take anymore.
"You are sick, lady!" the woman said, as she turned to get away quickly.
Carole laughed as she straightened up. "Have a nice day!" she declared feeling exuberant and victorious. Maybe she'd regret her behavior later, but for now, she felt like she'd just won first prize.
Just one car away from the victory dance that Mrs. Hudson-Hummel was doing sat David Karofsky, waiting for his own mom to exit the store. He'd seen that woman accost customer after customer, but he'd never been close enough to hear what she was saying. Nobody had seemed all that interested in talking to her, and David had been surprised to see Kurt's step-mom engaging in a conversation with her. Once they started to talk, he couldn't believe what he heard, and he REALLY couldn't believe what he saw. It looked like Kurt's step-mom was hitting on her. It was bizarre. David watched as she totally turned the tables on that self-righteous bitch. It was awesome.
And that's when David Karofsky fell in love with another member of the Hudson-Hummel family.
I'd love to know what you think! Please leave a review!