Disclaimer: JK Rowling owns all of these characters and Emily Giffin owns the plot of Something Borrowed. I own the idea of smashing the two together. (This disclaimer continues applying for the entirety of this story, so that I don't have to keep repeating it at the top of every chapter.)

Hermione braced herself as she prepared for what she knew Lavender had planned for her. Her best friend was not one to let something as 'monumental' as turning thirty slip past without all of their friends and relations taking notice. Especially since it was not Lavender who was hitting the landmark, but Hermione herself.

She walked into the bar that they had made their own over the years. Every anniversary, birthday, and celebration was held at The Leaky Cauldron and she couldn't walk through the door without smiling.


Today was an exception. She felt justified in feeling a little bitter today.

Hermione had the worst luck with birthdays. Every year was the same; being born in the middle of September meant that everyone was too caught up in beginning-of-the-year schoolwork to have much time for going out. Even her 17th was lackluster.

No, but her 30th was going to be something special. Her trusty best friend was going to make sure of it.

So, she took a breath, and pushed the door open. One beat, then two, then…


She put on her best shocked look and made the happy sounds expected of her. Lavender walked up to her and gave her a hug.

"Oh, Hermione, happy birthday! Were you shocked? It took me forever to plan this. It's been so hard keeping it a secret. I swear, I've given myself an ulcer."

"I didn't see it coming at all," said Hermione meekly. "I can't believe how many people showed up…I didn't know I knew this many people."

"Well," said Lavender, "I'm not sure you do. A bunch of them are my friends from work, but I really needed to fill up the guest list. I went through your address book and half the people in there are as old as my parents! No, we need young people. Because tonight we are bringing the house down!" And, keeping with her flair for dramatics, she swept away to mingle with her guests.

"Alright, bye," Hermione muttered to Lavender's back.

"Having fun?" said a voice over her shoulder. She turned, relieved, to find Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived, the Chosen One, and the One Chosen to Save Hermione from a Shite Birthday.

"Thank God you're here," was Hermione's reply. "I don't even know who half these people are."

"Well that's a relief. I walked in and felt insecure because I thought you had gotten all popular and had moved up in the world without me."

"Nope. I'm securely stuck in anonymity."

"Hey now," said a new voice, "None of that from the birthday girl. You should be in the spotlight."

And with that, a spotlight came on and Lavender's voice sounded through the room. The audience, Hermione included, turned to see Lavender standing on the bar – "…sooner than expected," muttered Harry – with her wand to her throat, amplifying her voice.

"All right, everyone? I just wanted to welcome you to the party, and thank all of you for being here for my best friend, the greatest girl in the entire world, Hermione!"

With that, a second spotlight lit the room, and Hermione felt herself blush as it found her in the crowd.

Lavender continued. "Hermione has been my best friend since we were wee firsties at Hogwarts. I can't believe she's turning thirty! Thank God I've still got a year. But she's been with me through thick and thin and I will love her forever for it. She was even there when I made my greatest re-discovery…Won Won…"

Hermione felt Ron, who had been behind her the whole time, shift uncomfortably as the spotlight widened to include him as well. He raised his hand in greeting and smiled at Lavender.

" …who just proposed to me last week!" Lavender raised her left hand and flashed the diamond solitaire to the crowd, who all "Awww-ed" appreciatively.

"So enjoy yourselves, everyone! Let's party!" Lavender finished, jumped down from the bar, and ran through the crowd to give Hermione a hug, before moving to put an arm around Ron.

"Thanks for that, Lavender," said Hermione, blinking her eyes to readjust them to the dim lighting. Lavender just smiled, before letting her mouth settle in a firm line.

"Alright, you three," she said, addressing Harry, Ron, and Hermione, "I know that this isn't really your thing, but you are not going to be anti-social tonight. You are going to go get a drink or three, you are going to meet people, and you are going to like it."

Hermione looked to her right to see Harry rolling his eyes. She stepped on his foot. His breath came out in a hiss and Ron looked up to catch Hermione's eye, a smile playing at the edge of his mouth.

"Yes, dear," he said, his gaze landing on Lavender. She started to walk away, before turning back to Ron.

"Are you going to come dance with me?"

"Aw, come on, Lav, you know I'm terrible at dancing."

"Fine, you spoilsport. Maybe I'll just go dance with Seamus. I know he won't turn me down." She huffed, turned, and stalked away.

Ron sighed and turned back to Hermione and Harry.

"She's got you on a short leash, huh?" Harry smirked.

Ron narrowed his eyes. "You know, Ginny's around here somewhere. I wonder if she's in a dancing mood..." He trailed off before smirking right back at Harry.

"Right then. First round on me?" Harry disappeared to the bar.

Hermione laughed. "You know that's not fair. He has no ammunition against that."

Ron just pursed his lips. "As it should be. Little wanker is dating my sister. I've got to keep him in his place. And if it means threatening him with his own girlfriend, so be it."

As if by magic, Ginny appeared at Hermione's elbow with a gift and congratulations. Harry showed up right behind her, passing a Firewhiskey to Ron and a Butterbeer to Hermione, finishing with a kiss on the cheek for Ginny.

"That was some speech, huh?" mentioned Ginny. "For a second I forgot who this party was for."

"Oh, come on, stop it," defended Hermione. "She was just being…." she looked to Ron for help.

"…Lavender." finished Ron.

"Right. And this birthday girl just wants to forget about being thirty." She traded her Butterbeer for Ron's Firewhiskey and started drinking in earnest.

"Hey!" Ron admonished.

"You were the one who said I should be in the spotlight. So come on, then. Drink up."

Looking back, Hermione realized that pushing everyone to drink was probably not the best idea. Especially since when the night ended, she found herself having sex with her best friend's fiancé.

Author's Note: Gah, drama! I started this fic soon after seeing the movie and re-reading the book, but I forgot about it and then rediscovered it saved on my laptop so the plot isn't as fresh in my mind as it once was. But I own the book in case I need a reminder. It will parallel to the book as well as I can make it, so please don't ruin the ending if you've read the book/seen the movie! Please and thank you. Enjoy, and, as always, review! McEs.