This fanfiction is for itapan, because she correctly guessed that the Yumi in our And A Bottle Of Rum fanfiction was Yumi from Chobits! As her prize, she got to have a oneshot of anything she liked. She chose an AsaKiku, M-Rated funny fanfiction, with a tsundere and blushing Arthur. So here it is! I hope you enjoy it!

Silence. Utter, peaceful silence. Strange for a place like this.

Though Japan supposed it made sense that the meeting room would be quiet when no one was in it. He was just so used to hearing shouting and arguments in the room that seeing it so completely quiescent was amazing to him.

He shut the door gently, stepping inside the large room. He looked around, noting no one else was in the room. It seemed he really wasthe first one here. Japan had expected Italy to be somewhere in the room, being as the energetic nation was hosting it, but he guessed the redhead was asleep somewhere in Germany's house, unaware of his lateness.

Well, there was no sense in just sitting there and waiting for others to walk into the room. Now was the perfect chance to catch up on the manga series he'd been reading. He still hadn't gotten the chance to read the next volume, which he'd bought two days ago.

He reached in his bag for the new volume of Heart No Kuni No Alice, but stopped when another book caught his eye. He pulled it out and examined the cover. He was surprise to find the book looked like a manga, but read from left to right. "Totally Captivated", the title said. Wait, wasn't this the "manhwa" Korea had given him the other day, claiming it to be completely different than Japanese manga? Japan could already tell it was just another instance of his brother copying off him, but he supposed it couldn't hurt to give it a look...

And thus, Japan found himself thoroughly engrossed in his new yaoi, barely paying attention to his surroundings.

England grumbled to himself, stumbling out of the elevator with his arms full of papers and his briefcase catching on the closing doors, another struggle for escape ensuing. He picked up his scattered papers after fighting the elevator for his attaché back, storming to the conference room flustered and annoyed. He knew he wasn't late, but it didn't mean the god awful traffic was easier to deal with, or the lobby wasn't packed with morons getting in everyone's way, or three of the elevators weren't out of order.

He sighed, opening the door of the room and walking in, already weary and there wasn't even a meeting yet. He paused, noticing Japan in the room. He was mighty early, he usually didn't show up until just after Germany. He seemed to not have noticed Arthur's presence, engrossed in a book of some sort. He quirked an eyebrow and walked over, peering over the Asian's shoulder to see what was so interesting.

Suddenly Japan turned the page and England gasped aloud, despite himself, at the image of two men splayed on a table suspiciously similar to the one in that very room, tangled in a mess of limbs and engaged in heated sexual intercourse. His face turned bright red, and he should have looked away, though he found it very hard seeing as his mind automatically inserted himself and Japan into the image, the dominant one in the picture just happening to be blonde to further stimulate his imagination. It wasn't the only thing he was finding hard...

Japan turned around at the gasp, jumping slightly at the small noise so close to his ear. He was surprised to see England, especially in the red-faced fashion the blonde was suddenly in. "Ano, Konnichiwa, Igirisu-san."

England gawked, stammering unintelligibly. He finally looked away, to the floor, shifting uncomfortably. God, this was so awkward. He shouldn't have read over Japan's shoulder, anyway. "I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean t-to..."

Japan followed the other's line of sight to the book and, smiling, held it up for him to take. "You haven't read this series, I suppose? I must warn you, it's easy to get addicted too. The sex scenes are some of the hottest I've seen."

Of course, he would never admit that to Korea, but in the interest of appealing to England's pervertedness, he had no problem saying it if the other would give the manwha a chance.

England's eyes widened when Japan suddenly offered him the book, his blush intensifying amid a new string of flustered gibberish. He didn't even know Japan was into that sort of thing, much less so open about it. "I, er... I... uh..."

"I really like this page best." He flipped back a few pages to where the uke was being whipped by the steamy seme. He pointed to the face of the submissive one, which was blushing and clearly lustful. "You can almost feel the pleasure he's receiving, ne?"

Japan stood up, moving around to stand next to England so the British man could get a better look. "I love a lighter haired seme with a dark haired uke. Don't you?"

England flushed darker, fixated on the image despite himself. Try as he might, all he could see was himself violating Japan. "I... I... er..." He stammered at Japan's words as he held the book up to him, fidgeting so badly he had to fumble to catch his papers as they slipped from his arms again. He tried to compose himself. "I didn't know... you... er... I didn't... you were... er... into that..." He cast his gaze to the floor, flustered.

Japan raised his eyebrows, surprised. "Hai, I've always been a big fan of yaoi."

He reached into his bag, pulling out an assortment of manga. He'd taken 5 volumes from his yaoi collection, just in case he got in the mood to read some boys love today. Korea's manwha had just happened to catch his eye, and it had been something he hadn't already read a million times, unlike the rest of his collection. He handed the books to England, each cover more suggestive than the rest. "These are some of my favorites."

England, having precariously stacked his papers on the table, took the books rather reluctantly, shuffling through them as his face became gradually redder. He stammered, unable to convey a coherent thought. One of the covers was an image of another blonde using a riding crop on another, in one the submissive man was handcuffed to something. His eyes widened at the cover depicting a pirate in full costume, bending another man over a crate, his jeweled fingers wound in the other's hair.

He shook his head, tearing his eyes away from the images. "Th-this is... er... I mean... I... you... this..." He couldn't even think straight. He'd never thought of Japan as a dirty-minded person. It was a bit of a shock to learn the shy nation was almost as perverted as he was.

Japan tilted his head slightly, unable to decipher England's words. He seemed to be so pleased with the books that he was speechless. He patted England's hand, nodding understandingly. "You can read them during the meeting. Most of the time you can get away with touching yourself, if you need to."

"W-w-wot?" England dropped one of the books in surprise and picked it back up, flustered. Did Japan touch himself during meetings? Oh no. He looked away as a new flood of images invaded his mind. He fidgeted again, unsure what to say or do.

"I... I... j-just... I'm... surprised..." Well, if that wasn't painfully obvious. "I-I mean... I don't... I... you..." If only he could remember how to talk. "D-during a m-meeting?"

"Hai, these tables are good for covering things up." There was only just enough space for the legs before a wooden block started, preventing anyone from seeing under the table. It had been installed by Germany after discovery that nations were crawling under the table and doing scandalous things together. Though the only way Germany had found out was when Prussia had tried to pull down his younger brother's pants... "But surely you've done it before?"

"N-no!" England answered a bit hastily. …Though there were times he arrived drunk to meetings, but even if he recalled doing... that, he wouldn't admit it in a million years. He handed the books back to Japan, dizzy. "I... I..." He was lost for words, unable to even lay eyes on Japan without thinking of him in all kinds of inappropriate situations. He quickly covered himself with his briefcase. God, he was such a pervert just thinking about Japan was making him hard.

"Never? But Igirisu-san, it's most exciting when it's in public." Japan took a step towards England, holding the books back for him to take. "Go on, give it a try." It was public if Japan watched, right? He sat down on the other side of the table, looking at the other expectantly.

England widened his eyes, paralyzed. Was Japan asking him to wank off in front of him? He moved his mouth to speak, but no sound came out. He felt kind of numb, actually. Here was a man he'd had a secret crush on for years and years asking him to do something dirty in a room that was about to fill up with people. And as insistent as his increasing hard-on was, this was so sudden, and confusing, and he'd never expected this of Japan. "B-but... I... I c-can't..."

"Hmm? Why not?" Japan stood up from his seat, walking back over to the man. One glance down told him that England had indeed gotten a certain "enjoyment" from looking at the yaoi manga. He poked the other's erection, raising his eyebrows at England. "It's not like you don't want to. Do you need help?"

England gasped when Japan suddenly touched him, turning beet-red and freezing in place. He mouthed noiselessly, his mouth dry. Was this happening? Maybe he was still passed out drunk at home having a wet dream? He forced himself to breathe, resisting the urge to just jump Japan. "H-help?"

"Hai, like this." Japan groped England suddenly, rubbing him in slow circles. Once England saw how exciting it could be to do it in public, he'd be comfortable doing it on his own. Then his manga profits would increase as British people would become addicted buyers. And maybe he'd spread the word. Soon the whole world would be buying his yaoi and yuri, his hentai...

England gasped when Japan suddenly grabbed him. His first instinct was to jump back, but he couldn't. He was in shock. Japan was touching him. Touching him. He lost himself. He suddenly grabbed Japan, pulling him closer and capturing him in a passionate kiss. A few seconds later, his brain caught up to his crotch and he pulled back, horrified. "Oh my God... I-I'm s-sorry..."

"Don't be. Give in to your urges." Japan wrapped one arm around England's neck, pulling his head down for another kiss. He coaxed England's tongue into his own, letting it wander around and do what it pleased in his mouth. His hands undid England's belt and the button on his pants, slipping past boxers to reach in a grope England. He stroked him, slowly increasing pace.

England's brain reeled as Japan kissed him, positive at this point he was dreaming. He kissed back eagerly, moaning into Japan's mouth when he suddenly groped him. His arms wound slowly around Japan as he fought off the lightheadedness from the situation. He couldn't believe this was happening.

Japan stroked faster, getting England's length up. When he was sure it had reached full hardness, he pulled away, licking the tips of his fingers of England's wetness.

He backed up a bit before gripping the table's edge and hoisting himself on it. He unbuttoned his shirt, pulling the fabric away from his chest. Aware of how exposed he was, he blushed slightly. "Would you like to touch, Igirisu-san?"

England stepped forward, dazed from Japan's actions. He gently ran his hands over the other's pale chest, over scars that only made him more beautiful. His face darkened, his fingers trailing lower as he leaned close to Japan.

Japan wrapped his arms around England's neck, resting his head on England's shoulder and breathing heavily. England's fingers paused over certain parts of him, certain places on his chest that made him gasp or shiver. As England's hands traveled toward his waist, Japan brought his head up to bring England into another heated kiss.

England leaned into the kiss with a soft sigh, closing his eyes. His fingers trembled, hesitating at Japan's waistband. He began fumbling, trying to undo the other's pants in flustered confusion.

Japan smiled into the kiss and pulled away to help England. "Don't be so nervous, Asa-san. I trust you." He slipped off his pants and lead England's hands to his boxers, pushing them past the waistband. He stopped England's fingers right before they reached his length, pulling his own hands away and allowing the other to decide whether he wanted to continue or not.

England's heart pounded against his ribcage as Japan helped him. He hesitated again before moving his hands lower, closing his fingers around Japan's member and slowly stroking it. He leaned forward again, pressing a few light kisses to Japan's pale neck.

"Mmnn..." Japan moaned softly, shutting his eyes and enjoying the feeling. His cheeks tinted pink, a display of the heat he was feeling. He craned his neck to the side to allow England's mouth better access.

England's head spun as he increased the pace of his stroking, his kisses travelling along Japan's jaw. He could barely think straight. His heart fluttered at the soft sounds Japan made, getting more turned on by the second. He groaned, his insistent hard-on pressing against his pants, and he wondered how far Japan would let him go. He pulled back, stammering breathlessly. "C-c-can... w-we... er..." He swallowed nervously, unsure how to convey his thoughts when they were so jumbled.

"Nnn...hai..." Japan breathed heavily, moaning louder as England's pace increased. He smiled as England stuttered out his first request since they'd begun. He leaned in to whisper into his ear, blowing warm air into it gently. His hand rested on England's erection, rubbing it slowly. "We can do whatever you want, Asa-san~"

England shivered as Japan breathed seductively in his ear. It was a side of the other he hadn't seen before. He moaned softly when he felt Japan's hand rubbing him, and continued his own ministrations, stroking the smaller nation and kissing his neck. He hesitated before gently tugging his waistband lower with his free hand, then slowly raising it to put three fingers to Japan's lips.

Japan couldn't help but buck and shiver as England continued touching him. He looked up as he felt something against his lips, and instantly took the hint as the saw three digits before him. He took the fingers into his mouth, sucking slowly and running his tongue over them before releasing them. He reached down to help England finish getting his pants off.

England closed his eyes again, his kisses more insistent against Japan's skin. He slowly slipped a finger into Japan, moaning softly again at how tight the other was. He was careful, worried that Japan might not be experienced enough to handle him if he got too rough.

"Nnh..." Japan tried to relax, shifting around as the finger entered him. He combed his fingers through England's blonde locks, enjoying the feeling of the British man's lips against his skin.

"More..." His voice was breathless, the volume softer than a whisper.

England obediently added a second finger, scissoring them as he moved them in and out of Japan. He sighed against the other's neck as Japan ran his fingers through England's hair. He waited for Japan to relax a little before inserting the third finger, slowly thrusting them in as deep as he could. He pulled his hand back and pushed in again, trying to prepare Japan as thoroughly as possible.

Japan moaned and rolled himself back down onto England's fingers. They felt so good inside him, the pain they gave only serving as more pleasure to the Asian masochist.

He lifted himself up slightly and pushed back against the fingers, hard, making a loud noise of pleasure as they hit him. He continued to do so, almost forgetting about England.

England shivered at the sounds Japan made, watching with lustful awe as the smaller nation rode his fingers. He almost forgot what he was doing, so enraptured by the way Japan's face contorted with pleasure. Finally he snapped out of it and slowly removed his fingers, lining himself up with Japan's entrance. "S-stop me if I hurt you..." He whispered in Japan's ear before entering him slowly.

Japan cried out at the feeling of being filled. He clung to England, his eyes shut tightly. As he felt England stop, the other being completely inside him, he finally opened them and looked into the trustworthy sea of emerald green that stood as the British man's pupils. He relaxed instantly, shivering slightly as he felt England brush a certain spot inside of him.

"Ooh~" England moaned as he pushed into Japan with some resistance. He looked into the other's eyes, panting. "G-god... you're so... t-tight." He gasped, gripping Japan's hips desperately. He slowly pulled out some before thrusting in again, moaning.

"Ah~!" Japan's body immediately responded as England thrust into him. His erection became harder, his body more flushed, and he bucked up at the feeling. With each burst of pleasure England's thrusts gave him, he called out. "Nnh! Hah!" He pulled England's head down into a heated kiss, moaning against his lips.

"Mmmh..." England kissed back eagerly, thrusting faster. He stroked Japan in time with his thrusts, thumbing over his head. He moaned, biting Japan's lip in a moment of passion.

"Nyah! Ngh!" Japan bucked up as England thumbed over his head, and once he'd done so he couldn't stop. He thrusted into the hand, moaning loudly into the kiss. As England's teeth sunk into his lip, the pleasure it gave him sent him over the edge as he cried out. "Ahh! Ooh! Hai, hai!"

England called out, clutching Japan to him desperately as he came, moaning. "Ah! Yes! Kiku~!"


"Asa-san? Asa-san?" Japan tapped England on the shoulder. The meeting room was empty once more, they being the last two remaining. England seemed to be deeply engrossed in the manwha. Japan smiled. He knew he would like it. "It's time to go home. What did you think of the manwha?"

England's head snapped up at the voice in his ear. He shut the book quickly, flushed bright red as he looked around frantically. He'd been daydreaming. He surreptitiously set the book in his lap to cover his hard-on as he looked up at Japan. "W-wot? Oh... i-it was... g-great."

"I'm glad. You can keep the book as long as you need it." Japan gave England a warm smile before going back to his own seat to collect the papers. He was getting a ride from Italy and Germany, so he couldn't stay and talk about the book with England, as much as he wanted to.

"Sayonara, Igirisu-san." Japan opened the door to the conference room, pausing just before he walked out the door. His smile widened into an almost mischievous one, and he gently yet seductively undid his top shirt button, turning his head to send one last comment back before leaving. "I was happy to "help". He ran a hand down his chest before winking at England and leaving the conference room.

England gaped, gripping the book in his hands and staring after Japan, bewildered. He glanced down at the book and sighed. Well, Japan was right, at least. The book was definitely addicting. Now he just had to go take care of his new little problem...

Was it all a daydream? Or wasn't it?

You decide~

Japan played by me, England played by Miirkaelisaar.

Thank you for reading! Please review ^^

Btw, I've found that whenever I eat scones (I have a bit of an addiction ^^") I daydream a lot while munching on them, which explains the title of the fanfiction!