*^* Fatum Lamarium *^* ~ Nerdette Love
It's Time – Imagine Dragons
Alone Together – Fall Out Boy
Let Her Go – Passenger
It is solid, smooth and unbreakable. That is the impression I get as I slide the sensitive underside of palm across the kitchen countertop. It reminds me of the vampires that rule our world in their distant domination over us. They skulk in the shadows and flit across the night, but they are untouchable in the pedestals they stand upon above our world and in their incapability of falling prey to our weapons. In our world it is one where we have no control.
But where did they originate from? How did they come about?
All I know is that they have infested our world. They have slowly crept in to invade our every continent and sunken their fangs into our land. The powers of the world lie in their hands; America, Britain, Germany and China. This is naming of a mere few of the political power houses, but undoubtedly every country is touched by the control of the cold, pasty-handed creatures.
Therefore, this golden eyed creature that stands tall before me with his calm and soothing manner is something of an oddity. He does not exude the intimidating stance and deathly tones that many of his race do. The pale, translucent skin is still present, that defines him as not human, but he appears to have manifested human traits. His stance is casual and a smile that can be described as friendly graces his face. Although the pearly white teeth that touch his lips possess points that suggest otherwise about his state of living. Despite this, I do not feel as unnerved in his presence as he hovers at the edge of the room beside the door.
Still, I cannot forget that he is a vampire and that they are devious and deceptive creatures. If he is not going to try and unravel all of my secrets himself, I am positive he will be attempting to toss me straight into the hands of his 'adoptive son' to act as mate and brood mare. And I certainly believe Edward will attempt to eventually gain every detail about my past possible.
Momentarily on my date with Edward I had allowed myself to become enraptured in his charm and gentlemanly behaviour, and maybe become caught up in the idea. However his reactions in the parking lot remind me that he is a vampire and this behaviour is almost certainly pretence. I cannot deny that his male form is utterly exquisite and I do admire it from a distance, but I cannot allow it to make me forget that he is a vampire.
Although Edward's reactions tonight have only confirmed my fears that from now on he will never relent. He will be forever unyielding in his pursuit to claim me and the only route I see out is death. After everything I have fought for, I will not end my time this way. The only option I have is to somehow learn to accept and live with it, with him.
The situation seems so final, and I know I cannot live with Edward or at least continue things unless he understands some of my history. It is not a concept I feel particularly comfortable with at this stage, but I fear my options are finally starting to evaporate and continuing to drag out these difficulties between us is appearing more stressful than I can cope with at the moment.
Carlisle is still smiling and standing by the door as my eyes flicker over to him, as I remember he is still present in the room. His eyes are unrelenting as they watch me, filled with what appears to be genuine concern. I feel like my skin is burning beneath his watch and I attempt to find purchase on the counter with my sweaty palms, but the thin sheen of sweat means they slide across the smooth counter without obtaining a hold. So I cannot move myself backwards to hide behind the kitchen cupboards hung on the wall.
In and out; I take deep breaths as I attempt to regulate my breathing. The panic is swamping me and attempting to consume me again and drag me away from consciousness, but I battle against it. My heart is pounding, filling my ears and the blood rushes to the surface of my skin and tinges it red. It is almost a signal, asking the vampires to bite me as I display my fresh blood.
I belittle myself mentally as I attempt to pull myself together and calm my bodily reactions. Without trying to overthink things, I bring my hand up to weave into the locks of my hair that cover my neck. Slowly I draw my hair away to the side to expose my vulnerability. I bare my sins and scars naked to the world. I am not quite sure what prompts me to do this so quickly, but I feel like revealing everything whilst I do not overthink it will help me.
"Isabella, may I approach you?"
"Call me Bella, please." I nod my head in assent to Carlisle.
He is beside my side within moments, not invading my space with his presence as of yet, he merely stands a short distance away and his eyes become the cool, speculating eyes of a doctor as he assess the exposed area of my neck.
"Oh, Bella." His words are so quiet I barely hear them, but the empathy that is expressed seems genuine and that shakes me. Vampires are not supposed to me nice. My past does not display how I have been a good judge of character, but Carlisle seems to exude goodness. He so thoroughly confuses my opinion on vampires.
When I catch his eye again I realise they are filled with sadness for me and I cannot stand to view it. They do not contain the pity that would be worse, but the seeming understanding is something I cannot cope with. I drop my head and hide away from the honest concern.
The connecting lines of the grey tiles on the kitchen floor are ones that I follow with my eyes. However I am interrupted in my trailing of one when two feet enter my line of vision.
"Would you care to discuss the incident?" Carlisle's voice is full of compassion, only a soft murmur.
I take deep breaths to control myself before I look up to face Carlisle. I do so with full eye contact as I want to demonstrate my strength.
"I was 18-8." I cringe as my voice cracks. I hate the weakness in me that finds it hard to discuss these things with other people. Revealing my 'soul's secrets' might not be a pleasant experience, but sometimes I wish that when I choose to do so, I would not befall such shyness and stuttering.
Carlisle does not interrupt, prompt or even pet me to offer comfort as some people would do, and for that I am grateful. I feel so isolated at times from people, never mind the vampires, which means sometimes contact with people is difficult for me to accept.
"He was the person I thought I loved." This time I look up to gauge Carlisle's expression, aware that I am discussing love; an emotion I am supposed to be feeling for his son. His eyes show concern but I cannot discern anything else in them.
"I trusted him; I thought we were going places. Until-l…" I gasp and clutch at my chest as I feel a searing pain inside of me. The thought of all the betrayal and hurt that came from that time is so much emotion all at once that I find it difficult to control it. My head seems to be like a movie on fast-forward, replying all the memories and events that passed between him and me. They continue on repeat over and over again, not stopping just after one play. These memories are tormenting me and pushing me to the edge as they force the words that need to be said out.
"He became abusive, controlling. That's when I got this." I lift my hair again to reveal the scarring that looks so unsightly again. The skin is still red and sore looking, despite no longer being tender to the touch; it reminds me constantly of him. I cannot escape his presence because his mark has permanently been branded onto my skin.
"May I take a closer look, Bella?"
I nod my head once in acquiescence.
Gently, Carlisle lifts my hair and moves his head closer to inspect the damage. I turn my head to the side a little so as not to see his reactions to the in-depth analysis of my bite.
"We can repair the skin and perform a skin graft if you would like to remove all signs of this scarring? However I fear that the sensations that you feel will remain from such a deep bite – his essence as such is imbedded in you. It can be potentially removed, but that would require a different discussion."
I return my gaze to Carlisle who appears to be a little bit embarrassed by the last comment, although he does not look happy about the bite. I realise the latter comment most likely has something to do with Edward. However in terms of removing the scaring, I do not know what to say. Once before I had contemplated the scar removal, but I wanted the reminder to stay away from vampires and obviously the extortionate cost to have it done properly which I cannot afford.
"I-I'm not sure." I am hesitant to say yes to something that is so monumental. I have lived with this thing on my neck for what feels like an eternity and removing it completely unnerves me.
"You do not have to decide this instance, Bella. However, I do suggest that we discuss more of the events, the particular vampire and details of your previous relationship soon. In particular Edward needs to know and I would consult him on the surgery beforehand."
I am certainly wary of Edward's reaction to all this information but I know that it is inevitable that he must know. Especially now I have told Carlisle. Although his manner in the parking lot unnerved me a little and whilst I was comforted by being removed from those vultures, I am frightened of the potential of Edward's rage when I am concerned.
"Will you-u, be there when I tell Edward?" I meet Carlisle's eyes when I question him this time.
He looks indecisive for a moment as he takes in my appearance, but finally he nods. A feeling of relief that is rather unexpected swamps me.
"Let's take a look at your cuts and bruises and get you patched up. I am sure Edward will be beside himself by now." His lips twitch a little as though he finds this thought amusing, which does seem a little sadistic.
Carlisle turns away to pull open his bag, which I presume contains his medical supplies and I take the moment to allow my fingers to drift to my neck. It is not very often I chose to feel the raised skin, to run my fingers over the teeth marks. It reminds me that he is in there. There is very little I can do to remove him from being part of me at the moment. But to stop seeing, stop feeling the mark it means I would not constantly have to relieve the events in my mind. To see myself in my head pinned against the wall with his fangs sunk into my neck as he gouged on my skin.
He had howled in ecstasy and laughed in derision at me. He had claimed nobody would ever want me again and I could only be his and how he would tell my father of my behaviour. I had been so utterly ashamed.
Unwillingly I feel tears threaten to spill over the edges of my eyes and tumble down my cheeks into the abyss of open space. I fight to hold them in. He is not worth my tears, he is not here now, and he will not defeat me.
This ultimately brings me one step closer to joining and accepting Edward. There is no going back from here.
"All done." Carlisle smiles reassuringly as he secures the last part of tape to my hand.
It looks worse than it probably is swaddled in the stark, white bandage with the extra padding. He had removed several small mirror fragments that were stuck in my hand before he stitched it up. However because it was my hand that I use frequently, Carlisle gave me some extra padding to add to the comfort of using it, so it would not rub against the stitches.
Coincidentally it happens that it largely prevents me from doing anything with that hand too. I am positive Edward will be happy about that because he would not want his 'porcelain doll' to be injured further. Stupid vampires.
"If you are feeling well, I would suggest at this point talking with Edward would be helpful before you sleep. I do not want to distress you further, Bella, but he is rather agitated and I feel it would ease you both."
I nod my head in silence. After everything Carlisle seems to have done in the past few moments, I feel like I owe him a moment of my time to talk with his son and show I will try.
In the moments spent tending to my wounds, he had talked about Edward and his 'issues' and I had started to feel a little guilty about my treatment of Edward. That does not mean to say I was ready to run lovingly into Edward's arms or forgive him for everything that has happened. This does not mean to say I can even accept his vampire state or the idea of mating, but I think at least talking is needed.
I jolt slightly at the sound of my name and look up to see Edward flying into the room through the now open kitchen door. The distress in his voice is clear as it sounds strained and his face is pinched up with a frown. He looks like he is about to come and sweep me into his arms and coddle me as he takes in me, but thankfully he pauses a few feet away from me. A strained look appears on his face as he pinches up his brows even more, but he remains a short distance from me.
Carlisle moves across towards the kitchen door and tips his head with a short smile to indicate he will give us some time alone. I smile encouragingly at him to indicate that I am happy with this, since I do not intend to divulge every detail of my past experience with him to Edward now.
I turn my attention back to Edward once Carlisle has left the room. He seems to have been waiting for the moment when my eyes were back upon him before he begins.
"I am so sorry." He draws his hands together and begins to twist them around. All these human mannerisms are starting to unnerve me: the facial expressions and the body language. I see him moving at vampire speed and behaving in the possessive manner, but then he seems to be trying to portray human behaviours and it disturbs me. Honestly I cannot fathom why he is carrying out these habits or whether his lengthy time surrounded by humans has meant he has picked up on them.
When I catch his eyes, he seems to be pleading with me. The golden eyes look so sad and honest and I find it difficult to maintain the eye contact. I would almost compare his eyes to those of a puppy that makes you want to cuddle and comfort it, but this is Edward…
"It does not change your actions, Edward." I feel so harsh, as the words slip from my lips and the hopeful glint that had appeared in his eyes disappears.
"I know. However, Isabella, you are my first priority and always will be. The reporters—" Their name is followed by a deep growl from Edward "—would have followed you and harassed you. I am trying to make this transition as easy and comfortable for you as possible."
The word transition sends a shiver down my spine as it reminds me of my human state and his state of undead. He will want to replace my humanity with death eventually. To give up living is such a big step; I do not even want to consider such a thought.
"Are you cold? I can provide you with a blanket or another jacket?"
"No. I am not cold."
"Are you sure, dearest Isabella?" His smile is so broad and beaming, it displays his pearly whites to the full.
"I guess a blanket would be great."
Before I even blink he is gone from the room, with all the excitement of a child to fetch me a blanket. It is merely fractions of a second before he has returned with a fluffy green blanket in his hand. Quickly he is before me and proffering the blanket with one hand as he practically vibrates on the spot. I am honestly surprised he has not tried to cloak me in the blanket and bundle me up himself, but he appears to have learnt from trying to take total control.
"Thank you." I reach out to take it from him, and he moves to help me into it as soon as I start attempting to wrap myself in it.
I smile because I realise Edward's overprotective nature has not been held back for long. However once I am thoroughly encased within the blanket he moves a few feet away to rest on the counter beside me. It is closer than before, but it still gives me the feeling of personal space.
He then looks on with me, with what appears to be expectation of having more to say.
"I…I understand your actions, Edward. However, it does not mean I can so easily accept them. Everything is new and alien. It is all really daunting." I rub my face against the warmth of the fluffy blanket to soothe myself.
There remains several minutes of uncomfortable silence as Edward watches me with an unfathomable look.
"Will you stay the night?"
It was not quite the response I was expecting to my statement, and it rather throws me off for a few moments.
"What about the three date rule?"
A deep, rumbling laugh escapes from Edward and the sound fills up my body with a warm feeling of happiness.
"I was not inferring we would engage in intimate relations, Isabella."
"I still have no things here."
"Is that a yes?"
"Angela will wonder about me…"
"You can text Angela and we can easily find you some clothes." Edward extends his arm towards me and offers me the palm of his hand.
I slide off the counter and reach up with my non-bandaged hand to take Edward's palm. It is cool, smooth and hard beneath my own hand; like the marble of the counter. It also feels strong and stable though and maybe familiar. I cannot believe these thoughts pass through my head, but I refuse to go on lying to myself about what I am feeling. Edward does feel safe.
His hand gently closes around my own as he weaves his fingers between mine and allows it to hang between us as he gently leads me from the kitchen. He retains his hold of my hand all the time as he shows me upstairs and to the room I assume in his guest room. I am surprised by his kind and considering behaviour throughout; there is no sign of his mood swings or possessive attitude. He provides me with a t-shirt and boxers for bed and shows me around the room.
If anything, I would regard Edward as having had a personality change within a few moments.
"I shall leave you to sleep well, Isabella, for this night and I shall talk with you in the morning. Try not to have any more incidents with mirrors please. Sweet dreams, my dearest." His smile does not quite reach his eyes and he seems to hesitate in his actions, but then he vacates the room, leaving me alone.
I stare around at the room feeling a little lost and alone.
One thing I can see as I observe the room is that it is absolutely exquisite. There is one dark red feature wall and the others are a warm chocolate brown that makes the space feel homely and enclosed. It is a very comforting feeling, one that makes me feel safe and secure even deep within the lair of a vampire. I am not enthusiastic about those 'modern', spacious bedrooms so this certainly is perfect.
The bed is so large that it swallows up most of the room space, with the gorgeous wooden frame that has intricate carvings of patterns and flowers that all intertwine. It appears to be made of solid oak that has been waxed and oiled to hold a darker tone. The sheer size of the bed is so intimidating, but it looks welcoming and I appreciate the simplicity of the room.
I take several strides across the room and throw myself onto the bed. I find myself bounced several centimetres back into the air as the bed pushes back against my weight, before finally I sink into the mass of brown, red and beige pillows and duvet. A small giggle slips through my lips as the bedding moulds around me and envelopes my body. Usually sleeping in a strange bed is a little bit disconcerting; however I do not have any qualms about the sleep I will be getting tonight. Not only do I feel thoroughly exhausted after the day's events, but this bed feels almost familiar to me. My eyes are closing off their own accord as I feel myself sinking into the clutches of sleep.
I stretch my arms around me, feeling a slight ache in the palm of one of my hands but nothing that is too painful. I am seeking the warm fluffy body that usually presides beside me and my hands seem to come up blank, only finding a mass of duvet and pillows. Well, the hand that can actually feel anything as I feel one of my hands is swaddled in something, maybe a duvet I cannot quite work it out.
The pillows however do not quite feel familiar to the touch and neither does the duvet. Slowly I lift my head from where it was buried face down in the mass of squishy pillows. The room is still dark so it takes my eyes a few seconds to adjust to actually being able to make out the shadowy shapes of the room. That is when I realise I am no longer in my own room at home, and all the events of last night rush back to me. I am in Edward's house…
I am not quite sure what feelings are supposed to be overtaking me, but I feel a little bit lost in this strange bed, in a strange house. I know I agreed to stay and all the events up to getting here I remember, but it is still slightly disconcerting for the first time to awake in a strange bed and wonder exactly what you are meant to do. What was the protocol for me now?
Knock. Knock. Knock.
Quickly I draw myself up in bed and rearrange the covers around me. At some point during the night I must have changed myself into the boxers and t-shirt and got beneath the covers as when I first laid down on the bed, I had fallen asleep largely straight away. My bandaging is still intact on my hand and in fact appears to be entirely secure so that it restricts usage, but it does not appear too hideous.
Once I am presentable, I tell whoever is at the door that they can enter.
"Good morning." The head that appears is not the one that I quite expect. It is the short spiky hair of Edward's sister, Alice that emerges from behind the door first. She is smiling rather shyly as she enters the room, carrying what appears to be dozens of shopping bags.
"Morning, Alice." My voice sounds dry and croaky to my own ears and I search around to see if there is any water around. On the side of the bed I see a cup of what I am hoping contains coffee. It disturbs me that somebody has been into my room whilst I was sleeping to provide coffee. Although I am not sure if it will be warm, so when I stretch over and grasp the cup, I am surprised to find the cup is still warm to the touch. When I draw it over to the bed towards me, I catch the strong scent of coffee that fills my senses and I just feel more awake from the very smell.
I take a big gulp of coffee and it practically burns my mouth, which suggests somebody knew I would be awake soon. The hot liquid running down the back of my throat soothes the dryness and invigorates my body making me feel more alive and sociable.
"How are you?" Alice trills as she bounces across the room towards me and flings the shopping bags across the bottom of the bed.
The bed is so big that even all the shopping bags do not reach me when sprawled across the bed. Alice hesitates at the edge of the bed, clearly indecisive about whether I will be comfortable with her so close.
"You can sit on the bed."
Her smile is so bright; I think she is going to explode out of happiness.
"Oh, Bella, we will be such good friends, I promise you."
I smile slightly in return and sip more of my coffee feeling a little disturbed by Alice. Although her personality is so kind and bright that it is hard to try and hold a grudge against her, even if she is a vampire.
"Anyway, I have bought you a whole new wardrobe here. I wasn't really sure what you want to wear so I just bought everything. I do love shopping! So we can get you changed out of Edward's clothes. I know he likes it, but there is just absolutely no need for you to be dressed like that when we can provide clothes so easily. I mean you can drink your coffee off course first and shower like humans like to, but then we can pick you out an outfit for the day. Do not worry about the cost either, I love it and we have more than enough money to buy you a few things. They really weren't that costly!"
I blink several times wondering whether Alice had stopped to take a breath at all in her speech. Then I stare at the designer names on all the bags and wonder how she can say they were not costly. To me, those things would be something I saved for, never mind dismissed as cheap. I guess this is how the rich live in that designer labels can be seen as replacement for the high street shops. Maybe tailor made is where the real cost lies or maybe they just have so much money that nothing is ever expensive to them.
I turn my head to Alice who appears to have said something again whilst I was thinking about money and clothes.
"Sorry." I smile sheepishly and take another long drag of the coffee.
"Don't think about it."
"Are you a mind-reader?"
She giggles now and it is such a beautiful sound. It sounds so pure and childlike. "No, I just can see everything written across your face."
"Oh." I feel my cheeks warming up to indicate the presence of my blush.
"I'm so excited to be friends with you and take you shopping." Alice begins to bounce giddily up and down on the end of the bed.
This time I find myself laughing at Alice's behaviour. She is just so infectious in her excitement that I find it hard to reject anything she says. Out of all the vampires I have ever met, Alice is so different in her childlike enthusiasm and open friendliness.
"I hate shopping."
"Oh you will absolutely have to change that attitude, Bella! Now time to get up and ready." Alice drags the duvet away from my body, exposing me to the coolness of the room.
She smiles cheekily and runs off to the bathroom where I hear the shower being switched on. I quickly gulp down the last of my coffee aware that I probably will not get to finish it with Alice's behaviour.
"I'm coming." I swing my legs out of the bed and shuffle towards the bathroom, aware that Alice is already a whirlwind and my life will be much easier if I do not argue with her.
"You can move faster than that, you grandma!"
Alice's teasing note makes me smile. I feel some of the stress of the past few weeks slip away from me and the uncomfortable feeling of being somewhere new seems so distant at this moment.
"Bella, I love it!" Alice is jumping up and down on the spot with excitement. Her spiky bobbed hair is bouncing up and down around her cute little pixie face and she is practically vibrating with happiness. It is actually infectious so despite the fact I have become almost a Barbie doll to be paraded in numerous different outfits before she was finally happy, I smile.
She finally settled on allowing me to wear a pair of dark blue denim jeans, a cream silk vest with a sapphire blue button blouse that is long sleeve and draws in at the wrists with two silk band cuffs. She removed some of the bandaging on my wrist to be able to slide the blouse on and for that I am thankful as it provides more movement.
The material of the blouse is soft and slides across my skin. She has then accompanied the whole ensemble with thankfully, a pair of cream converse that have studs on to give them a slight edge, and a brown leather jacket. I manage to feel comfortable in the clothing whilst being entirely out of my element with all the different names and labels I see that I do not recognise entirely. However, I have to say the clothes fit well and are comfortable so whatever the label I cannot complain.
"Thank you, Alice."
"Oh, don't thank me. I just love doing this; I could do it all day. Oh wait, I do!" Alice starts laughing again and bouncing around, picking up discarded clothes and packing them into bags and moving them into different piles.
Within a few moments she is finished stacking up the clothing bags.
"Here is the pile that you are keeping, these I'll donate to somebody else they are quite your style but I was willing to go a little risqué." I stare at the two piles and I fear my eyes are about to bug from my head.
Three-quarters of the shopping bags have been stacked to the side for me to keep. I do not even think we got through all the clothes so I dread to think what is amongst that pile and I am positive there is a Victoria Secret's bag amongst that pile. I shudder at the thought of why she has bought that; not something I want to consider at all!
"Really, Alice, I cannot accept all of this!" I wave my hands around at the pile of shopping before me. This is probably worth my year's wages, if not more in those few bags alone.
"Nonsense, it's already paid for. Now it's time to go show you off!"
I fake frown at her. "Alice, I am not a Barbie doll to be shown around."
"Of course not, you're much prettier." She takes hold of my arm and gently begins dragging me from the room; although I am rather helpless to follow because despite her small stature she is still a vampire with immeasurable strength compared to weak me.
"Everybody!" Alice's voice is barely louder than a whisper but I hear movement downstairs to indicate people have heard.
There appears to be more than one voice floating from downstairs and I glance at Alice in alarm.
"It's only the family, they're eager to meet you. Please, Bellaaa!" She pouts and gives me this very sad eye look and I find it hard to put up any resistance to her. So I find myself helpless to her charms and I allow myself to be led downstairs to meet the 'family'.
My heart is hammering against my chest the more steps we descend to the downstairs. I feel like it is going to erupt from my chest it is beating that quickly.
"Calm, Bella." Alice smiles reassuringly at me and squeezes my arm.
The murmur of voices coming from the living room comes to a stop as we reach the bottom of the stairs. Alice doesn't release my arm, but gives me a moment to compose myself before dragging me into the living room to face the family.
My eyes immediately land on Edward who is standing near the back of the room; hands clasped looking a little out of place and agitated. Once his eyes meet mine he seems to settle down, he smiles brightly at me and I feel something inside myself settle to. Something that until that moment I had not realised had been disrupted.
"Bella, this is the family!" Alice swings her arm around to the rest of the people stood in the room.
I draw my eyes away from Edward to register the other bodies and faces in the room. There are two other females, and three men, one of whom is Carlisle. I recognise one of the men as Emmett who came to my aid when Edward had run away. The other two women I presume are partners of the male vampires. I vaguely recognise faces from magazines and the media, but I cannot say I am entirely familiar with them.
Carlisle steps forward first. "Bella, I would like to introduce you to my wife, Esme."
"Hello, Bella." This is the brown haired one, which is slightly smaller, curvy and has a pair of plush wide lips that fill her face and balance out her big round golden eyes.
"Hi, Esme." I wave slightly awkwardly at her.
She steps back to wrap her arms around Carlisle who draws her into his side.
"Hey, Bella. I hope you remember me, Emmet, Edward's big bro! I promise still not to bite you—" Edward interrupts him by growling, and his brother merely laughs and sticks his finger up at him. "This is my wife, Rosalie." He beams with pride as he draws forward the immaculately dressed blonde who has long wavy hair and holds herself stiffly looking like she would rather not be here.
"Hello, Isabella." Her tone is harsh, formal and unwelcoming.
"Finally there is my Jasper. He's still new to the vegetarian ways so forgive him for being a little distant." Jasper is the curly haired man that is hovering at the far edge of the room, but he smiles and nods his head.
"Hello, Bella." I'm surprised to hear the deep Texan accent from him, but he still appears to be attempting friendliness despite his situation.
Edward chooses this moment to weave his way through his family towards me, as Alice vacates my side, not before a quick hug to stand beside Jasper. I guess she wants to support her husband, which I guess is understandable.
"Isabella." I look up at Edward, realising he has still not adopted the shortened version of my name, unlike the rest of his family. Although I had told him he could not.
His eyes widen in what appears to be surprise, but then a short smile crosses his face.
"Bella, would you like some breakfast?"
"Do you have any food in?"
I hear a chuckle from somebody in the room, but I ignore it, focusing on Edward.
"There is a fully stocked kitchen and I can cook. I took lessons, actually." Edward looks a little uncomfortable at this point and he ducks his head. I would say if I knew him better that he was embarrassed by this fact.
"I would love breakfast then."
"Great." He beams at me and offers me his hand.
I take a look around at his family members all stood rather awkwardly in the room, trying not to watch us and I realise this is all affecting them too. They are trying not to look hopeful for him, but are failing rather miserably as they try to discreetly observe our relations.
Without another thought I slip my hand into Edward's hand. I watch as he interweaves our fingers and our palms seem to fit perfectly together. My hand is small enough to fit into his and his long, slender, piano fingers wrap around and encompass my hand. I realise then, this makes me feel safe. I feel like I actually belong with Edward and that when he had not been present I had started to feel like part of me had maybe been lost.
A dawning realisation came over me, Edward was becoming part of my life now whether I liked it or not. He was safety, familiarity and comfort.
"Oh, Bella, once you are finished with breakfast I would like to check your dressing and talk some more."
I turn my head to look at Carlisle and his smile is one that is meant to comfort and encourage as he stands with his arms wrapped around Esme. The whole family seem to be trying to emanate comforting tones, well, other than Rosalie who still appears hostile. I realise that Carlisle is also indicating that it is probably time to tell Edward.
I never thought about things being so swiftly unravelled, but it was going to come. I glance at Edward who is watching us with a slight frown and then I nod my head.
"Yes, I'm ready."
Carlisle looks relieved at this point and he only nods his head in return before I allow myself to be led out of the room by Edward to get breakfast.
Sorry guys about the delay, things have been really crazy and I am still trying to work in between all my real life on the story to get it finished. Hope you like it. Leave me your thoughts. Thanks for sticking with me and for all your reviews so far, they mean so much to me as I read and appreciate each and every one. They motivate me to write I promise you!