Disclaimer: Bees don't bee and bears don't bear for me because I own none of it besides the thought of this creation

Author's Note: This idea popped into my head and had to get out, but it did provide this Catch-22 situation. You'll see.

Blame it on the Writers

David Addison couldn't sleep. He hadn't caught much shuteye lately so it wasn't an unexpected development. Maybe it was due to the sudden void in his life from the abrupt closure of Blue Moon. Or, perhaps it was because he no longer existed as a television character. Or, quite possibly, it was because he hadn't seen a certain blond in a week. Whatever the reason, he didn't think Mr. Sandman was going to grace him with his presence. He turned on his back and glared up at the ceiling, his mind racing.

He and Maddie had had their final chase scene. It even had jokes and gags like usual but this time their purpose was different. They weren't trying to solve a murder; they were trying to save themselves and their show. They had failed miserably.

He couldn't stop thinking about what Cy said to them: "…romance is a very fragile thing. You two were a great love story. People fell in love with you two falling in love, but you couldn't keep falling forever. Once it's over, it's over, and I'm afraid for you two, it's over." Why was it over? He hadn't decided it was over. To him Annie was just a stop along the way. A laugh. He wasn't sure where exactly he was going, but he thought it would lead him back to Maddie. Had she decided it was over? He couldn't be positive but from the way she had acted it didn't seem like she thought they were done. Emotions flooded through him.

Anger, hurt, and an overwhelming sense of betrayal invaded his thoughts. Allowing someone to write your life comes with blind trust. You assume that in the end everything will be as it should; that there will be a definite conclusion. Not that the last image on screen would be one that was taken three years ago and leaves everything up in the air. He adjusted his pillow and tried again to close his eyes and silence his musings.

Agnes, Bert, MacGillicudy, the wobblies and Maddie drifted through his mind. Not see them ever again? Impossible. There were so many loose ends. But so the writers seemed to imply. The writers…

His eyes flew open as a thought struck him.

Wait…the writers? They couldn't decide anything for him anymore. They didn't have a say over what he did now. So why had he spent the past week cooped up in his apartment instead of trying to fix things? He assumed that someone would tell him what to do. He forgot that life didn't work that way. Normally, people weren't trying to get their banter approved by censors. They were out there making their own decisions.

David determinedly threw off the blankets and his feet hit the cold wood floor. Sleep wasn't happening tonight, so why pretend? He put on a shirt, grabbed his jeans, hurriedly sticking one leg in, then the other and almost tripping on his way out the door. No one had ever written in a car for him but that was fine. He felt like walking anyway.

Maddie Hayes had fallen asleep. It had taken some mind clearing on her part, but she had successfully done it. The past week had been long and trying. She was tired of living in a hotel while her house was busy being refitted with windows and doors. She missed the comfort of her bed and relaxing in her tub. You just can never trust hotel tubs, no matter how nice the place may be. And the bed wasn't comfortable. The sheets were scratchy.

Truth be told, she missed David. And Agnes, Bert and the rest of the wobblies. She was worried that none of them, including her, would find jobs. She may never see them again. The last five years of their lives were intricately entwined and now they were just supposed to go their separate ways? She was not to try to fix Agnes's anger and hurt at her? See Agnes and Bert have children? Find MacGillicudy a better cardiologist? She was not supposed to resolve things with David?

At least she wouldn't have to confront him about Annie again. His actions showed her that he was a different person than she had thought. It hurt and she couldn't imagine anything he could say or do that would make it better. Maybe Cy was right. They were done. That was as far as she had let herself go before closing her eyes and forcing herself into sleep.

Maddie wasn't dreaming when a hesitant knock rang out. She was asleep, but there was no one to write a sequence. The rapping wasn't loud enough to wake her, as if the culprit of the noise was unsure if he really wanted her to answer. Finally, he worked up the courage to knock louder and follow it up with a "Maddie!" for good measure.

David heard some shuffling behind the door and a pause while she looked through the peephole. He took this time to shove his hands into his pockets and rock impatiently on his feet. As soon as the door was open and he could see Maddie's eyes squint from the glare in the hallway he made his way past her. In his excitement he began to pace. They hadn't seen each other for a while but there'd be plenty of time for staring later. At least that's what he thought until she turned on a lamp and he caught sight of her in a silk camisole. His breath momentarily caught as he took a slight step towards her before recollecting himself.

"David, what are you doing here? Is something wrong? Why are you pacing?" She took a seat on the edge of the bed, fighting back a yawn.

"I came to a realization tonight, Maddie. A big one." He turned and paced the other way. "More things have changed than we realize." She felt like she was watching a tennis match, as he seemed determined to wear a hole in the carpet. "We can reopen Blue Moon. Hire everyone back. Continue working on cases. Cases we choose. Maddie, everything's changed. We're not gone though. Not yet. We don't have to close!"

"But, David, we did close. You were there. You saw the office. All our stuff was gone!" She was worried. He was handling this much worse than she imagined.

"We can buy more stuff, Maddie! They didn't take our money!"

"They didn't?"

"No. They only took what was in the office."

"Oh." She looked at him. His hair was sticking up in many different directions, no doubt because he had run his hands through it several times on his way over. He had remembered to put on shoes but she was pretty sure his shirt was backwards. He was a mess. "David, have you been drinking?" He paused momentarily in his steps.

"Drink-? Have I been drinking?" She nodded her head. "No, Maddie," he responded exasperatedly. "I have not been drinking. I've been thinking."

"Really? I thought there'd be more steam." He shot her a look and her countenance turned serious. "About Blue Moon?" she asked, allowing them both to ignore her previous comment. David threw himself into a nearby armchair, his hand reflexively going to massage his temple.

"Yes, about Blue Moon." He shifted his body and leaned towards her. "Don't you see, Maddie?"

"See what?"

"Why are you still here?"

"Huh?" Her eyebrow raised in confusion at the sudden change in conversation. "Where? Here? The hotel?"


"Well, I don't know if you remember this but a bunch of friendly law enforcement officials decided to crash through every glass window and door in my house trying to save us."

"And how long ago was that, Maddie?" He was staring at her intently.

"You were there, David. You know when it happened."

"I do. But, don't you think it's a little odd that you would still be living in a hotel. Don't you think the repairs are finished? It was over a week ago and there was a rush put on it."

"I guess it could be. But then wouldn't I have been informed? Don't you think someone would have called me?"

He jumped up from his seat. "Let's go see."

"Now? David, it's late."

"So? You live there. Are you worried you're going to disturb someone's peaceful slumber?"

"The way you disturbed mine?" David ignored her and kept talking.

"Look, if it makes you feel better we'll turn the headlights off when we get to the driveway. C'mon, Maddie, throw on some clothes and let's go check it out." He looked her up and down. "Unless you'd rather stay in that little number, in which case I don't think turning off the car lights will make a difference. You'll wake someone up for sure."

Just like David promised the headlights were off when they made the turn towards Maddie's house. She began examining her home, noticing the reflection of the streetlights in what must be the new windows. David put the car in park and got out, opening Maddie's door for her.

"Seems good as new to me," he commented as they started up the walkway.

"Yeah, looks that way, doesn't it?" She took out her keys and unlocked the door. Besides a fine coating of sawdust it looked exactly like Maddie had left it before the police intrusion. "You wanna check around down here while I get the upstairs?"

"How 'bout we both go upstairs?" he asked, lightly placing his hand on her hip.

"David," she warned and headed up the steps.

"Can't blame a guy for trying." He began singing "Duke of Earl" as he went about his inspection. Maddie found it comforting that she could tell where he was as she moved about the upper floor. All the windows were replaced. There wasn't a sign that glass had once shattered over the carpet. She slowly made her way downstairs, sweeping her eyes over everything once more to make sure.

"Yes, oh, I'm gonna love you

Nothing can stop me now

'Cause I'm the Duke of Earl

oh, yeah, yeah, yeah"

David was walking around the living room, checking behind the curtains when Maddie entered, smiling against her will at his high-pitched singing.

"Upstairs is just fine," she spoke and he turned in her direction.

"Glad to hear it, Goldilocks." He looked around. "Down here seems in order, too." He took a seat on the couch. "So, why didn't you check on this earlier?"

"I don't know, David. It just didn't occur to me," she said, sinking onto the nearest seat.

"Weren't you getting tired of the hotel?"

"Of course I was."

"Seems odd that you didn't call the contractor."

She looked at him, her annoyance beginning to boil at his incessant needling of the subject. "I don't know why I didn't think to check, I just didn't, okay?"

"Okay." A ticking clock became the loudest sound in the room as they sat in an uncomfortable silence. Maddie broke it.

"You can go home now, David. I think I can handle things from here."

"You know the guy who came in through that window really scared me," he said looking towards the spot, ignoring what she said. "I really wish he could have announced himself or something."

"But that would have defeated the purpose."

"Yeah, I know, but still..." He cleared his throat, trying to push out what he needed to say. "I should have been there."

"You were there." Maddie clearly remembered David and herself standing in her living room, being forcibly held by two men so they wouldn't escape, when the cops made their presence known.

"No." He gestured like he was waiting for the right words to drop out of thin air. "I should have been here the entire time. The past couple of months. I should have been here." He shifted in his seat. "I wanted to be here for you."

He caught Maddie off guard. She hadn't seen this conversation coming. "I don't want to do this right now."

"What? Are you busy?" Sarcasm dripped from his words.


"C'mon, Maddie, don't you see? Don't you see how things have changed? Ever since Blue Moon closed things have been different."

"Well, of course things have been different. We have nothing to do."

"That's not what I mean. Of course things are different because of that, but you can't honestly tell me that it would be normal not to check on your house? And to never leave the hotel you were staying at in the past week." She had been staring out the window, but turned sharply back towards David after the last sentence.

"How did you know that?"

"I didn't for sure, just a lucky guess." He had her attention but he knew his grip on it was fragile. David was desperately trying to hold onto it. "It's weird that we haven't talked or seen each other in a week. It's weird. It's not us."

"We've not seen each other for weeks before."

"Yes, but that's because someone or other has been on vacation or, as I like to refer to most of season four, sabbatical. That doesn't happen when we live less than twenty minutes near each other."

"That's true."

"See, exactly. And I figured out why," he said proudly.


"Well, I'll explain it to you, Blondie. You know before the show ended, how you would get the urge to do something and without thinking about it, it would just be done? For instance, you would sleep with me for over a month and then suddenly up and leave for your parents."

"Enough about Chicago, David." Her eyes were on the verge of full glare mode.

"Fine, fine. But you get my drift." She nodded. "Have you had that feeling in the past week?"

"No," she replied, racking her brain for any moment when that irresistible urge may have occurred. "I haven't."

"Exactly. It hasn't shown up since the show ended. And do you know why?" Before she could respond he answered for her with a flourish of his hands. "No writers."

"No writers?"

"Yep, no writers." He jumped up and began pacing in front of her again. "We are free to do whatever we want, Maddie!"

"We were always free to do what we wanted, David."

"No, we weren't! You know we weren't!" he turned around quickly, running his hand through his hair, and turned back to her. "Think about it. Would you normally have been that rude when a group of your employees sung happy birthday to you?" She thought for a moment.

"No. Who gets upset when people are trying to do something nice for you?"

"And, would you have given back all that money that clients gave us when we couldn't complete the task to perfection?"


"Maybe?" he gaped at her. "Usually it wasn't our fault that we couldn't solve those cases, Maddie."

"I don't know. It's possible I wouldn't have returned some of it. We really needed that money. Sometimes I was surprised that I gave it back."


"That still doesn't prove much, David. Maybe I was just feeling too much like a Good Samaritan those days and that's why it happened. They were still my choices."

"Sure they were," he said and she looked appeased. "Except they weren't."

"David, I chose to give that money back. Me. I did it."

"Okay, so let me ask you this," he said, sliding onto the couch right next to her. "Would you have gone to Chicago?"

"What?" she asked, coloring slightly.

"You heard me. If it were up to you, would you have gone to Chicago? For four months? Never talk to me? Marry Walter?" His face was serious and he was watching hers intently. "Would you have done any of that? Would you have denied this?" He moved his hand back and forth between the two of them and held his breath, waiting for her answer.

"I really think we should have this conversation some other time." She fidgeted, uncomfortable at the turn they had taken. She looked anywhere except at David's face and tried to concentrate on the birds beginning to sing outside.

"Answer the question, Maddie."

"Well, what about you, David?" Her best defense was a good offense. "Would you have done what you did? Throw me a church wedding? Sleep with my cousin?"

He didn't hesitate. "No."

"So, what? We're just supposed to ignore everything that happened? Pretend that they didn't have an impact on us? Just blame the writers?"

"I think they're a big part of it, but no. All those things did happen. We can't pretend they didn't. But that doesn't mean they have to influence us anymore. We didn't choose them."

"That's not possible, David!" she said, exasperated. "They did happen and they impacted us in a very real, lasting way."

"Why do you have to do this?" he groused, throwing his head back against the couch. "Why can't we just move past it? We don't have to have to talk about all of it. They weren't our choices alone, Maddie!"

"I know that! But they still happened! My relationship with my cousin is basically nonexistent now. And you're still pissed at me because of my marriage to Walter!"

His head popped up and he stared at her thinking she must be crazy. "No, I'm not!"

"Yes, you are!"

"No, I'm not!"

"Yes, you are!" David let out a frustrated groan.

"Every time, Maddie! Every time you manage to think up something new. Some new excuse. I was blaming the writers, but now I'm not so sure. Maybe it's just been you the entire time!"

"What's that supposed to mean?" she shrieked.

"Exactly what I said!" he yelled back. "You can't just let this be! There always has to be a problem!"

"The problem is that you slept with my cousin multiple times!" She stood up, glaring at him.

"Because the writers made me!" he yelled.

"You seemed to be enjoying it!"

"I can't believe you!" He got to his feet, facing her. "You know what? I don't think we needed the writers. Let's just forget I came over here tonight."







He stormed out the front door, viciously slamming it shut behind him. Maddie took a deep breath and began climbing the stairs slowly. She had a hope that he would come back, even though she didn't think it seemed very likely.

David, luckily, still had the keys to her car and hopped in. He got to the end of the driveway before even contemplating going back. Apologizing. He thought better of it. The writers always had him giving in. Let her come to him this time. He sighed. Why was this so difficult? He threw the car into drive. Maybe he owed the writers an apology.

Maddie knocked on his door. She had trouble sleeping and, after tossing and turning for an hour and a half, decided to go to David's. Leaving everything up in the air did not sit well in her mind.

After a minute or two the door flung open and a rumpled David appeared, rubbing his eyes. He had actually fallen asleep easily for the first time in awhile. Of course she would decide to interrupt it.

"What about Agnes?" she spoke. It wasn't what she meant to say, but that's what came out. It was as good as anything.

"Huh?" It was eight o'clock in the morning and she was worried about their secretary.

"You know Agnes. Receptionist. Rhymes a lot. Agnes." Maddie was all put together, not a hair out of place even though she was functioning on very little sleep. David looked the exact opposite.

"Yeah, yeah. And what about her that you had to disturb my beauty rest?"

"Can I come in?" she asked, getting antsy standing in the hallway.

"Of course," he mumbled, opening the door wider to allow her to pass.

"She really seemed pissed at..." her voice trailed off as she stopped short at the sight of his living room. "You got furniture," she observed.

"Yeah," he said scratching his head, trying to choose his words carefully as he walked past her. "I'm gonna get rid of it though. Not really my style." She walked closer to it, took a whiff and stepped back.

"It smells terrible!" She looked closer at the cushions. "And it's stained!"

"Yeah, water stains, courtesy of your cousin." He didn't really want to mention Annie, but he knew that if Maddie didn't get the whole story she would keep bugging him until she did. This way she didn't ask any more questions. "Anyway, like I said, it's going. I'm thinking brown leather next or maybe back to nothing."

"Sounds nice," she muttered, glad the couch was going to vacate his apartment soon. Its presence mocked her. She forced a smile and turned towards David.

"About Agnes..."

"Yes, I do realize Miss DiPesto was a bit upset at us."

"David, she was crying and yelling. I think she was furious."

"Yeah," he said distractedly. That couch was like having a three hundred pound elephant in the room. "Let's go into the kitchen. I'll put on some coffee." She followed him and took a seat at his table. It had mismatched chairs. Very David. He was pulling open one of the cabinets, looking for the black caffeine. "We'll fix things with her when we reopen Blue Moon."

"Reopen Blue Moon?"

"Yeah, maybe under a different name though. There's probably a copyright on Blue Moon. I was thinking 'Addison and Hayes Investigations.' It sounded good the first time it popped into my head. We can hire everyone back and make another go."

"'Addison and Hayes', huh? I don't know, David."

"Well, I guess we can make it 'Hayes and Addison.' I just want you to remember that I'm making a concession on that, even though it was my idea." He was measuring out the coffee carefully. He was worried he might overdo it. "And what else is there not to know? We have the employees. We're seasoned veterans. We know what we're doing."

"Do we?"

"How can you ask that?" He sat while they waited for it to brew. "What have the past five years been to you?" He paused, but before she could respond he continued. "Actually, don't answer that. Plus, maybe she's not really pissed at us."

"Agnes? Of course she is."

"Maybe not. Maybe the writers made her feel that way."

"I guess it's possible," she conceded.

"Possible? It's probable, Maddie. Agnes couldn't stay mad at us! I'm not sure she can stay mad at anybody."

"That's true." She gasped. "David!"


"But what you were saying about the writers! Maybe our Miss DiPesto, now Mrs. Viola, can actually hold a grudge! The writers just had her not doing it." She sighed. "This is all very confusing."

"There's only one way to find out!" He made to get up, but she placed her hand on his arm.

"They're on their honeymoon, David."

"Oh, right," he said, sitting back in his seat. A silence fell over them. "So..."


"You came over here."

"I did."

"To my place."


"To talk about Agnes?"


"Just about Agnes?"

"Bert, too."

"You haven't mentioned Bert."

"I haven't?"

"No," he smirked and got up to pour them some coffee. "You haven't."

"Oh, well, I hope Bert isn't mad at us either."

"Probably isn't," he said, sitting back down. Maddie took a sip.

"Mmm. Good job, David."


"Okay, what?"

"Okay, let's do this."

"Do what?"

"C'mon, Maddie. You know why you came over here. Let's just do this. There's no writers. No one telling us what to do. Just you," he pointed at her, then back at himself. "And me."

"I know, David, but that doesn't mean it's less difficult for me."

"Why not? You don't know how you feel about good 'ole Dave?"

"It's just hard to say." She was growing embarrassed and began examining the mug in front of her.

"No, it's not. You just say 'David, I love you. I want you. I want to be with you.' And then we kiss passionately and fall into bed."

"You don't think there's more to it than that?"

"Sure there is! But I'm all for fast forwarding to the falling into bed part."

"I'm not surprised."

"I didn't think you would be." The silence that settled over them this time was comfortable, like wearing a favorite sweater on an autumn day. It gave Maddie time to build up the courage to blurt out what she was thinking.

"I do love you, you know." A smile so big broke out on David's face that he tried, unsuccessfully, to hide it by taking a sip of coffee. It gave her the splash of bravery that she needed to continue. "Sam, Walter, they were all just roadblocks. Sam was a young love that overstayed its, and his, welcome. Walter I can't explain. I think that was purely the writer's fault. But, at the same time it helped me to realize that I wouldn't be happy with anyone but you." She laughed at the slight weight that now lifted off her shoulders. "And then there's Annie..." she trailed off.

"A mistake-"

"Funny," she cut him off. "I remember her parents saying that." She held up her hand to her mouth in disbelief that those words passed her lips. David began to laugh.

"And they said you couldn't tell a joke!" She cracked a smile.

"I guess I'm just full of surprises now."

"I'm counting on it." His green eyes seemed to turn a shade darker as he drank in her glowing appearance. Maddie's cheeks had flushed pink, whether out of embarrassment or realization he was unsure. Her eyes sparkled with humor and more than a hint of desire. David was about to lean in and get on with the passionately kissing part when she began talking again.

"But seriously. About Annie." She knew she had ruined the moment but it was important to her that she get this out in the open. "I was blindly jealous. But, while I accept that it wasn't completely your choice, it still makes me uncomfortable when I think about it."

"So, don't think about it."

"It's not that simple, David!"

"Yes, it is!"

"No, it's not!"

"It wasn't my choice, Maddie! Sure, I would have flirted with her to get your green-eyed monster going, but get into bed with her? A married woman on top of it all! You're out of your mind if you think I'm like that." He was emphatically waving his hand around trying to get his point across and then paused, trying to regain his composure. His voice lowered. "No," he said sternly. "I will not get pulled into another fight with you about Annie. She is not worth it!"

"I know!" she exclaimed, then quieted her voice. "I know." She raised her eyes to lock his in her blue gaze. "But, if you ever go after her again I will break your legs."

David was pleased and surprised at Maddie's show of possessiveness. When the show was on he hardly ever saw a glimpse of it.

"I wouldn't dream of it." Then, as an afterthought he added, "And the same goes for you with Sam."

"But not Walter?"

"I'm not worried about Walter." He was smugly grinning at her.

"Well, you seemed concerned at the time!"

"Of course I was! Think about it. The last relationship you were in prior to him was with handsome, macho, bad boy me and you were getting married to, for lack of a better word, a major geek! It was going to ruin my reputation."

"He was not a geek!"

"Oh, Maddie, he was the perfect definition of a geek, nerd and dweeb."

"He was a very nice man, David!" Indignation rang clearly in her voice.

"Yes, you're right, he was a very nice man. I have nothing against him outside of the fact that he got to marry you, but now I'm pretty secure that it's not going to happen again. I don't think I have anything to worry about there." That cocky grin hadn't left his face.


"Okay then, we're in agreement. I'll stay away from Annie and you'll stay away from Sam."


"Good," he said and held out his hand. "Shake."

"Is that really necessary?"

"No, but it's for good measure." Maddie gave in and as her hand met David's a shock went through her system. It traveled down to her toes, which is probably why she was too distracted to notice that David was leaning in and about to connect his lips with hers.

"Wait a second! We're not done here yet," she said, pulling away from him.

"We're not?" he asked in disbelief.

"No, of course we're not."

"Why not?" The whine seemed to echo throughout his apartment. He had already tried twice to kiss her. Why was she stalling?

"Well, I've talked a lot about my feelings, thanks to your cajoling, but you haven't mentioned yours. This isn't a one way street, David."

"Maddie, the second I realized there were no writers telling me what to do I left my nice, warm bed and found you."

"But-" He silenced her with a finger on her lips.

"I found you because I knew that it was where I wanted to be. It wouldn't have been different if you had gone to Tahiti or even back to Chicago. I would have found you. And now that we don't have to deny this and no one is even telling us to try, I would really, really like to kiss you."

"But, you haven't said it."

"Said what?"

"It. You know, what I told you." He continued to stare blankly at her. "Ugggh! That we're more than just friends. Compadres. Pals."

"Whoa there with the pals talk."

"Exactly. That you would like to sleep with me, that you want me, and that you...you know." She was looking at him hopefully. She wanted him to catch her drift; she didn't want to spell it out.

"Ohhhhhhhh," he dragged it out slowly, knowing what she was waiting to hear but enjoying watching her squirm a bit. "You mean you want me to tell you that I love you?" Her smile brightened. "That I love the way you slam doors, yell at me, and call me immature?" Her smile was slowly fading, but he grabbed her hand and kissed her fingertips. "Yeah, Blondie, I love you."

"Then kiss me, stupid."

David got up and pulled her with him, bringing them closer together. He raised a finger to push a stray piece of hair behind her ear. The other hand glided down the side of her body, making her shiver. She leaned her head towards his but he backed up a little, wanting to make the first move that connected them. Her fingers were dancing on his hip, driving his desire to the limit.

"Finally," he murmured. "We're on the same page."

"And no one wrote it for us," she said.

Cupping her cheek, he leaned in and their lips met in a kiss worthy of a series finale.