A/N: Sorry about the wait guys I lost the original version of this back when the severe thunderstorms raced across the Midwest here a few weeks ago. I really hope I didn't forget anything. If you have any questions let me know.
Rating: R (M)
A special thanks to: ladybug82896, Susanj01, Cathy, gmb1064, kaciemarie, et, MissTeenageDream, Holy Cross Baby, and twilightobsessed40873a. Thank you all so very much for supporting me in this endeavor. Without you guys I would give up on my stories completely, I am truly glad you like this plot and are interested. I truly do apologize for the wait and hope that you enjoy this chapter as well.
~Chapter 2: Truth~
The sun shone down through the window, small dew drops clung to the window pane because for once it wasn't raining. It should have been pouring. Nothing should be as beautiful and peaceful on a day filled with so much sorrow, so much pain that I literally could not move. The pain of Edward leaving was nothing, nothing but a drop in an ocean compared to the agonizing awareness that she was no longer here. My daughter. My baby.
Cold blooded monster.
Amusement flashed through me, I recognized it as it slid by, my mind shifting through it even when my body didn't realize it was there. All I could focus on was the pain, the overwhelming need to vomit and cry and hide, the need to hold tight to what I still had. And the hatred, oh God, the hatred. I could feel it, always there, festering like an infected wound that refused to heal. This would never heal, never go away.
My phone buzzed on the night stand, a hollow empty noise that irritated my senses, the darkness in me growing as I slid further away from it. It was him, I knew it was him. I didn't want to see him, didn't want to acknowledge his existence, because if he was there, then this was real. And this, this couldn't be real. I couldn't handle this if it was real. I needed it to be a dream, a nightmare that I was stuck in; it was the only way I could survive.
I knew soon he would come, would go against my wishes and storm into my sanctuary and destroy all I had worked for because that's what he did. My gut clenched at the thought. A week, a whole damned week that blurred before my eyes filled with tears and soul wrenching agony so deep that my teeth still ached with the taste. And still it was not enough. There would never be enough mourning for her, not enough tears shed, and never enough misery to experience for her death to be recognized. She had been everything to me, my whole world, my baby. Gone.
"Bells?" his voice made the agony release, and once more the tears formed, the whole ripping wide open where before I had been able to shove it back.
He hadn't left me and I hadn't said a word. Charlie had stopped coming in after the first few days, already calling Renee to come get me. I had refused to go. I couldn't leave, couldn't go back to the sun and sand and life, because if I went back it would be like she never existed. And I needed to forget, needed to believe that she hadn't been real, but I couldn't. Because she had to be real.
His warm arms wrapped around me as he hugged me close and even his heat and comfort could not penetrate the sorrow and winter I found myself in. Nothing could. Nothing would ever chase away the hollowness that now rested in me. She was gone. My baby was gone.
"Shhh, honey, I'm here," he whispered, his warm breath causing my body to shiver as the sobs tore through me, my chest convulsing on itself. Nothing made it better, not even the sun.
Hours, minutes, days passed without my knowledge, and still he stayed, still he clung to me when there was nothing left. Still he stayed and still the hatred and burning hunger pulled me further and further into the woman I did not recognize. She was angry, sore, agonizing, and thirsty. I wanted him to hurt, wanted him to mourn, wanted him to suffer as he left me to do. And despite my reluctance to see him, my gut clenched at the thought that he hadn't tried.
" Bells, I have to go, honey," he whispered, his weight shifting as the mattress lifted, the comforting warmth suddenly missing. "I'll be back tonight, promise."
I didn't answer, I never did, and he no longer expected me to. My stomach protested his departure, my muscles screaming to reach for him, to pull him close, but I forced them down, retreating into myself. He would be back, he always came back. Jake. My sun.
The door shut quietly behind him, the room suddenly too still, too empty, and my soul cried out in agony at the thought. I needed him, needed the warmth like never before. I couldn't stand the cold, couldn't stand the night. A month, a month of nothing of days blurring together into weeks, hours into days. The passage of time was nothing to me, no healing and no comfort to the emptiness that would not leave, that only festered and grew. I was empty, my arms were empty. And still he went; still he walked this world somewhere without the emptiness that I felt, without the agony that I could not escape. He still walked this world and he still had control.
I lifted myself from the bed, the sheets leaving me naked to the coldness of the room, but I shrugged it off, determined to make him hurt, to make him whither as much as he had forced it on me. The phone, the damned machine that had haunted me for days in the beginning, reminding me of just how much they controlled my life, of how little I mattered, lay silent and still.
I ripped the charged from the drawer, my breath laboring from just the tiny exertion, my muscles protesting as I made them do my bidding. Soon I could lie back down, soon I could lose myself in the misery that still wormed through my veins, but now, now he would hurt. Now it was his turn.
The screen lit up, the sharp metallic melody hurting me with its memory, but later I could cry, later I could hide, but now I had to fight.
Their names blurred before me, the ripping gully through my heart intensifying, deepening, but soon I could try to sow it shut, soon, but not yet.
His name flashed in my vision and before I could back out I hit the send button, my stomach turning in knots, protesting, but I didn't care.
"Hello?" I jolted at the voice, memories flooding me as I fell to the floor, my elbow slamming into the bedframe as I sucked in a breath.
"Emmett?" without his hearing I knew he wouldn't have heard me, the choked sob so weak that I barely recognized the movement.
"Bells? Damn it girl, what happened? I haven't heard from you in a month, the whole family is flippin' the fuck out…," I cut him off before he could finish, the cry of agony tearing through me before I could stop it.
"Bells? Don't cry, I'm sorry, shit, I'm not good at this shit, you know that," I did know that, knew that he would be racing here as we spoke, because no matter what I was family and family was everything to him.
I hung up the phone, unable to continue, unable to stand the feel of the phone in my hand, unable to handle the blinking screen that read pending messages, that said 257 missed calls. I instantly ripped the chord from the wall, satisfied at the sharp snap as the end broke, good. I didn't want it to work ever again.
I slipped into Jake's shirt he had left, noticing weakly that my room, once so orderly was now littered with his clothes. Bed sheets were rumpled and the desk that he worked at every night was littered with papers, books hanging precariously off the side. I couldn't make myself care, couldn't really find it in me to move them, to reassert myself in my own walls.
The knock on the door didn't surprise me, didn't make me jump as I was sure it should have. Instead I turned, calling softly for him to enter, my body growing cold, his amber eyes causing me to cry out as I clutched at my chest, trying and failing to hold myself together. No. No I couldn't handle this, couldn't handle the reminder. He had done nothing wrong, but still the pain of those familiar eyes scorched me with its intensity. I needed Jake, needed my sun to keep away the ice.
"Bella!" he tried to comfort, his marble hands gentle as he hugged me, but it only caused me to fall into tremors, my lungs seizing as I wrapped my arms more soundly around myself. No, please no, not now.
Her smiling face danced before my eyes then, bronze curls bouncing as she jumped, her teeth so white they were blinding. She was so beautiful, such innocence and love reflected in those brown orbs and before I could hold her she had been taken, stolen from my clutches. Nothing would make me forget, no one could comfort me.
"Get the hell away from her!" his snarl should have frightened me, I should have worried about a fight forming in my room, but I didn't, I couldn't bring myself to care.
The cold arms fell away as I clutched the blanket to my chest, falling to my side as I cried, my sobs echoing off the walls, the other two silent. Then soon the warm arms from before fell around me, comfort flickering in the recesses of my mind as I slowly fell from my panic. He was here. As long as he was here he would hold me together. As long as he was here I could do this.
I wasn't sure how long I laid there, curled in on myself, my arms around my stomach as my hands fisted to my sides. Jake curled around me, his body cushioning my own as he murmured in my ear, the warmth seeping slowly into my lifeless skin. I needed him, needed him to remind me that there was still some good in this world even if I wasn't able to see it.
"I need to sit up," I whispered then, my voice but a breath, but Jake heard, his body rising with mine as he kept his arms around me, holding me together when I wasn't able to do it for myself.
"Say the word, Bells, and he's gone," Jake growled, his chest vibrating with the noise, the tremors rocking me. "Promise."
"Just try, Pongo," Emmett hissed, his eyes hard as diamonds, his eyes watching my every move as his stone muscles flexed.
Jake tensed behind me, the growls growing in intensity as his arms tightened around me. But even as anger vibrated through him, even though he was so much stronger than me, Jake never allowed his strength to harm me. And I knew without a doubt that he never would. He built things up while they destroyed.
"No, Jake, I have to do this," I whispered, my voice slowly gaining strength as I pulled on the comfort of the hatred boiling so deeply inside me. "Emmett, I need your help."
"Anything, sis," he said, his body slowly relaxing, but only minutely, I knew that he was ready to rip me away from Jake at any moment.
"I need you to contact your lawyer, I need you to help me get divorce papers lined up," I said slowly, my voice rough with disuse but full of passion.
"Divorce?" he said, his voice incredulous as he suddenly looked at Jake's arms around me in a new light, now his growl filled the room in fury. "There better be a damned good reason why you're about to rip my brother's heart out, and it better not be because your sleeping with that mutt."
Jake growled, his voice harsh as he cursed in my ear, his body tensing further, but I held him back, my hand resting gently on his. He stilled but still he fidgeted, begging me silently to let him go, to let him remove the vampire that stood by, glaring menacingly at the two of us on the bed. I didn't blame Emmett, he didn't know what had happened, but the pain at the thought of explaining it to him stole my breath.
"He…" I looked to Jake then, my throat closing in on itself as tears streamed down my cheeks, but I knew he was no help, he didn't know either.
"I haven't slept with Jacob, Em," I responded, my hands fisting as I fought through the pain, my chest humming with agony.
After that Emmett sat on the floor his gaze steady as he watched me, the betrayal stinging my lips and tongue as I told it. As it progressed the room filled more and more with growls as the two men fought for control, anger and hatred running through their eyes so deep and for once, not for each other.
"I can't see him, Em, I can't talk to him, I just need him gone," I said, my voice so broken it was barely recognizable.
"I'll call, Bells, and I sure as hell am going to have a talk with those three," he said, his eyes now black and his teeth bared.
"I'll kill him, Bells, I swear to God I'm going to fucking destroy that leech," Jake growled, his muscles so tensed that the veins clearly stood out again his russet skin.
"No," I said, my head shaking as I turned to glance over my shoulder. "No Jake, let him live, let him live for eternity. I want him alone and hurting for the rest of his existence. Death is too easy."
"I'm sorry, Bella, if I had known, if I had any clue…" Emmett's voice once hard as stone now sounded choked, his eyes swimming with tears that would never fall.
"I know, Em," I said, my breath hitching as I touched his arm, my finger burning with the contact, but I ignored them.
"And Rose…," he said, his voice suddenly dropping as he looked at me, his gaze thoughtful, "I can't promise she won't kill him Bella, and I won't keep this from her. After tonight everyone will know of their betrayal."
"I know, I thought of that, but try," I said as I tried to ignore the slightly happy portion of my soul that yearned to watch his body erupt into purple smoke.
"And Esme, she'll be broken, she won't stand for it, there may be more divorces than just your own," he said, his voice grave but no less sure. It was tearing him apart inside, family was everything, and now the one he had been so apart of was about to fall.
The room was silent then, my breathing rough as I tried to fight my pain, the burning emptiness in my womb screaming. Jacob sensed it, a deep thrum reverberating in his chest, tickling my back but soothing me none the less. Every night as I fought for sleep and ran from the nightmares and pain that awaited each abyss, he would make this sound, almost a purr but rougher, a growl that held no malice, full of love and understanding and acceptance.
"Emmett, tell your leader he is no longer welcomed in the area, that he has twenty-four hours to vacate Forks, at sunset tomorrow I give orders to kill those three on sight. The agreement is now void. They took a life and I will not stand for it," Jake said, his voice was steady, absent of hatred that I could feel echoing through every move he made. It was the voice of an Alpha, a voice of a Chief, and soon I knew, he would be taking his place as leader.
"I understand," Emmett responded, no fight left in him as he slumped, his eyes tired and suddenly he looked as old as he truly was.
"You and the others are still welcomed," Jake continued, his gaze kinder than it had been only moments before. "The mates of those who betrayed Bella are only welcomed as long as they separate themselves verbally to me or one of my wolves. If they stay by their sides, they will be considered accomplices to this crime and will be judged as harshly as the traitors, understood?"
"Understood," Emmett said as his shoulders shook as he tried to pull himself together, his breathing harsh. He glanced at me then, his eyes so full of misery that I felt myself wishing to hold him to me, but knowing that the feel of his skin was too fresh in my memory.
"Let them know they are prohibited in contacting Bella in any form, and that those who stay are to leave her alone as well until she decides differently. They may stay, but I don't want them bothering her," Jake commanded, his voice so hard that there was no mistake who was in charge.
"I understand, Chief Black," Emmett said and I looked for any form of sarcastic malice lining his face, but there was none. Emmett was recognizing the same that I had realized only moments before. Billy was the unofficial Chief and Sam the Alpha, but here, in this room, for the first time, Jake was becoming both.
Jake nodded his head, his eyes locking with my own, before resting his chin on top of my head. He had said his peace, the politics having now been settled and he had left it to me to finish it. My heart thudded at the thought, but as much as I loved Emmett, as much as I trusted him, I needed him gone. I needed to be able to mourn once more, the whole burning in me only growing.
"Thank you, Emmett, for everything," I whispered as I looked at him, the tears falling faster than they had been.
"I'll take care of everything, Bella," he said as he rose, his voice suddenly as quiet as my own, the strength had been completely stolen from him.
I nodded my head at him, watching him with as much tenderness as I could muster, hoping that he understood because I could no longer voice it. The choking cries were instantly filling my throat as I turned back to Jacob, my head burrowing into his shoulder, hiding. And as soon as the door clicked closed, the wails of agony and misery tore through me so violently that instantly Jake pulled me down, his hands clutching me as tightly as he dared.
My baby was gone, my precious vibrant daughter who would never laugh, never smile, never dance, had been destroyed so suddenly and violently that the whole left in me was so large and deep there was no hope of ever filling it.
I whispered her name them, needing to hear it in the air, needing to reassure myself with its sound.
"What was that?" Jake asked, his hands moving slowly, comforting and kneading any of my muscles that had become solid and rigid.
"It's her name," I answered, my watery gaze locking with his own. "Her name is Renesmee."
A/N: Hopefully you guys liked this chapter, let me know what you think. Ja!