Hey guys. Wow, thank you so much for all of your kind comments. I replied to every reviewer who was logged on. I'm glad you enjoyed the first chapter. This is part two and it's basically Carly and Freddie talking about his relationship with Sam. They also talk about the events that happened in iSaved Your Life so that will be interesting. There will be some Seddie goodness here too haha.
After a fun night of iCarly, Carly said she really needed to go pee and dashed out of the studio while Sam and I got stuck cleaning the place. There were hot dog all over the studio because Sam and Carly wanted to see who can throw hot dogs at Gibby the fastest without getting tired. Of course, Sam won.
I had a huge bucket in my hands as I picked up hot dog after hot dog. Sam was never the type of person to help out with the cleaning and this was no exception. I assumed that because we are now dating that she'd actually start helping me every once in a while but no, she is still the same old Sam except that I get to see a more romantic side of her.
"You could help," I said to her, hoping that maybe she'd reconsider.
"Nah. Besides, Benson, I am too tired from all of that hot dog throwing earlier," she responded. I rolled my eyes as I watched her throw herself lazily onto one of our bean bags. I wanted to laze around as well but Carly was gone and Sam refused to help me.
Speaking of Carly, I noticed that she didn't return from her so called pee. I was beginning to wonder if she actually went to the bathroom or she just used it as an excuse to leave me and Sam alone. Carly has been doing that a lot lately. I guess she wanted Sam and I to spend as much time as possible so we could get to know each other better.
"Hey Benson." I turned to look at Sam, wondering what she wanted. She signaled that she wanted me to walk towards her. I gently placed the large bucket back on the floor and I walked across the studio to see what she wanted.
"I really want a burger. I'm gonna go to The Groovy Smoothie. Help me up." It wasn't a polite question, it was a demand. I was going to tell her to get up herself but arguing with Sam is pointless so I gave up and held out my hand for her to reach.
Working out has definitely paid off. I remember when Spencer threw out some weights because they were too heavy and they hurt his muscles to I took them into my room when my mom wasn't looking. She doesn't exactly approve of anything that could land on my foot and break it to many pieces. So when I was done with my homework, I'd tell my mom that I wasn't finished and I'd spend that extra time working on my biceps. They definitely come in handy. Now it takes Sam longer to beat me at arm wrestling.
The fact that I am indeed stronger gave me an idea. She took my hand so I could get her on her feet and I pulled her up towards me. I must have pulled hard because I heard her gasp. I quickly caught her by the waist and I held her close. She had the palms of her hands flat against my chest. I knew she was surprised.
"What's all this about?" she asked in a serious tone. She looked at me like I was some kind of weirdo. It was the exact look she gave me after I kissed her at Troubled Waters.
When Sam and I started going out, I was very hesitant about touching her. I was afraid that even the simplest touch, like touching her shoulder, would set her off and she'd yell at me to back off. I had no problem holding her waist though because I always hold it when we kiss. Other actions such as holding hands or putting my hand on her knee were actions that I was afraid of doing. It wasn't until we were walking back to Bushwell from a date that she took my hand in hers and assured me that she wouldn't bite my fingers off.
I answered her by slowly leaning towards her and gently pressing my lips against hers. She moaned and placed her hands on my biceps as we started to move our lips against each other. Something about kissing Sam feels so right. Maybe it is because I shared a lot of firsts with her, good and bad. She was my first kiss, my first tormentor, the first person I ever shared a locker with, and many more that I couldn't think of at the time because all I could concentrate was on kissing her breathless.
My hands roamed her sides. They slid up and down from her waist to her hips. I had taken a liking to that specific area of her body. Her waist is so small but she has pretty wide hips and her curves feel amazing to the touch. I couldn't get enough of them. I had my hands on her hips and I slowly started to slide them up and under her shirt. They skin is so soft, softer than anything I've ever felt before in my life and I could tell she enjoyed it too because every time my fingers touched the bare skin on her hips, she'd pull me closer to her.
Her hands moved from my arms to my neck and pulled me closer to her, only this time she was a bit more forceful. She ended up pulling us down on the bean bag and she was only being forceful because she spun us around so that my back was on the bean bag and she was on top of me.
Our bodies were flush against each other. Sam and I have done our fair share of making out but never like this. I've never had the chance to have a girl on top of me and man, did it feel wonderful. Another first to add to my list.
As we continued to kiss, I couldn't stop thinking about how clueless I was. I didn't know where else to put my hands or if I should do something that could lead to more than kissing. Just as I was about to run my hands down to her sides and to her thighs, she pulled away. She was breathless and her lips were slightly swollen and they were a shade of pink darker. All I wanted to do was attack those lips once again. Those lips were puffier because of me. I didn't realize how long we were kissing until I started breathing heavily, matching Sam's breaths.
"Why did you stop?" I asked her, trying to catch my breath.
"Not that I didn't enjoy this, Fredalupe, but things were getting a bit heated and I'm even more hungry." Sam lifted herself off from me and stood up, pulling her shirt down to cover the little bit of skin that I exposed from our make out session.
"Hey, you're the one who pulled us down," I retaliated. I stood up to stand in front of her.
"Yes but who was the one who tried to seduce me when all Mama wanted was to go to the Groovy Smoothie for a burger?" said Sam as she poked my chest.
"I did," I said in a murmur as I playfully swatted her hand away so she's stop poking me. It wasn't exactly true. Maybe I just wanted to kiss her. It's a lot better than cleaning up a studio that was trashed with hot dogs.
Sam laughed a little and I couldn't help but laugh with her. I love that even though we are dating now, our relationship hasn't changed all that much. We still bicker, though it's more playful than it used to be. She still enjoys teasing me but she doesn't throw insults that deflate my masculinity (or lack thereof). I'll never forget the day my mom started warming up to Sam and decided to show her some never before seen baby pictures of me. Sam would not shut up for a week about how dorky I was even as a child. But I honestly wouldn't have it any other way. We're still the bickering sidekicks, except that we make out every once in a while.
"Are you going to take long?" I asked her.
"I might." She shrugged her shoulders and then her eyes widened a bit. "Why? Is my little Fredward going to miss me?"
"No, Puckett. I'm going to be extremely happy if you take long," I said to her with an equal amount of sarcasm.
"Don't worry, I'll try to be quick. I'll be back before 9 okay?"
I pulled her closer again and I kissed her softly. It wasn't as heated as our previous make out session. This was more of a see ya later type of kiss. We pulled back and we hugged tightly for a moment. I closed my eyes in happiness.
If this was any other day prior to the lockdown, I would have laughed in anyone's face if they told me that Sam and I would be dating. I swore that we would never be an item. I told a freaking bra that I would never date her and she would never date me. There is a lot of irony in our relationship. Just like the time I told Sam I didn't want to kiss her and she said she wouldn't do it, not even for 9 billion dollars. We both said we'd never do the things we've been doing lately.
Sam and I were very uneasy with each other when we first started dating. I could tell she had a lot on her mind though she never wanted to talk about. I know that at some point, she doubted my feelings for her. But the kiss she gave me at the lockdown was so sudden and hard for me to register. I spent so many hours thinking about it and I questioned whether or not I cared about her as a friend or more than a friend. As much as we bickered, I did grow some caring feelings towards her.
We let go of each other and I watched her exit the studio and go down the stairs. I sighed and continued to pick up the mess Carly and Sam left in the studio. No less than a minute later, I heard loud footsteps and I knew someone was coming. Maybe it was Sam who was coming upstairs to ask me for some money but to my surprise, it was the petite brunette that I used to crush on. I honestly forgot about Carly when I was with Sam.
"Hey, where did Sam go?" Carly asked.
"She went to get some burgers. Hey, do you mind helping me out?" I lifted the bucket and pointed around the mess in the studio.
"Oh yeah, sure."
After finally getting some help, Carly and I were done. We ended up taking a bean bag each and we decided to rest for a while before it was time for me to go home. That reminded me.
"Carly, that was a really long pee," I said, giving her a smirk. Then I looked at her gratefully. "Thank you."
"I don't know what you're talking about," she replied, sarcastically. Then we both laughed.
"So, Carly, what were you doing while Sam and I were here?" I laid my head back against the bean bag chair to relax my neck.
"I was replying to fans on Twitter. I've been doing that a lot lately," she said.
"I'm sorry. I don't want you be the third wheel." I pulled my head back up and gave her an apologetic look. I really did feel bad. Sam and I were in sort of a honeymoon stage and I don't know how Carly didn't want to kill us.
"Don't be," she smiled. "It's not as bad as when Sam and Jonah were dating. You guys still do iCarly and we still go out for smoothies. You guys don't make it awkward for me. And I also want you guys to have some quality time to get to know each other better."
"Thanks, Carly. Getting to know Sam on a more personal level has been great. I know things about her I never knew."
"Oh yeah? Like what?"
"Hmm… oh yeah. She really likes Taylor Swift. It's not what she normally listens to but she finds her music catchy."
"Oh yeah," she sad and started laughing. "We were singing to one of her songs during a sleepover. It was so much fun."
"I still can't believe this is happening right now," I said.
"Freddie, if I were to tell you a few weeks ago that you and Sam were going to kiss live on the web and start dating, would you have believed me?"
I could tell she was being serious but the way she said it made it seem like this was just a casual conversation. Something in my gut told me that things were about to get serious in this conversation we were having.
"Honestly? No, I wouldn't have believed you. I feel like a jerk for saying this but I would have laughed and thrown an insult about how ridiculous it would be." I admitted.
"What makes you say that?"
"Because. We've done nothing but fight since we met that I sometimes forgot all of the nice things we've done for each other."
"How sweet," she said with a smile on her face. "You know Sam always gave you a hard time but she really warmed up to you eventually. She didn't show it often but you know she slowly started caring about you just like you started caring about her. You were very iffy about expressing it too."
"Yeah," I looked down and chuckled. I would never forget the day Carly realized that even though I thought of her as a THING instead of a she, I still cared about her. It wasn't something I'd say out loud but Carly knew it and she seemed very happy about it.
"Can you ask you something, Freddie?" Carly said in a more serious tone. I honestly didn't know where this was going and I was kind of nervous.
"Uh… sure," was all I could say.
"I know you've always cared about Sam as a friend but what made you realize that you like her more than that? You were so confused before we went to visit her at Troubled Waters but then you kissed her the next day with such confidence. What happened?"
Oh boy. I honestly thought Carly was going to bombard me with questions the minute Sam and I made our relationship official but she didn't. She stayed cool about and she wasn't needy for answers like she was when she found out about my first kiss with Sam. I wasn't sure I was ready to have this talk with Carly without it being awkward. There is still a very important conversation we have pending and we've been putting in on hold for a couple of months now.
I thought about my answer carefully before looking straight into her eyes. Looking at Carly closely, I realized that I will always love her no matter what. She will always be special to me. But looking at her didn't give me the same feeling I get when I look at Sam. I still show signs of anger when Carly has a boyfriend and even though it is clear as day that I've moved on, I will always be disapproving of any boy she dates. Just like Spencer. Carly is like my sister now.
"I uh… the day she kissed me at school, I was very confused about it. I didn't know if she did it to get me to shut up or if she maybe felt a little something for me. I…"
I had to stop for a moment. Sam is the only person I talked to about this. We sat down one day and decided that if we were going to be dating that we had to be completely honest with each other. Carly and I have always been close but for some reason, it was hard to put it into words for her. We were already having this conversation so I tried my best to keep going.
"The day we went to visit her at Troubled Waters, you know she confessed her feelings for me. I spent the entire night thinking about her. Before I knew it, the sun was rising. I wanted to be sure that what I was feeling was more than confusion and if I really did like her like she likes me. It was then that I noticed something about Sam. Something that made me want to punch myself in the face."
"What is it?" Carly asked curiously. I knew I had her full attention.
"I realized that she is more than someone who loves food, fighting, and being rude to people. I realized that she too has feelings. Even the toughest and strongest girls want to feel loved. I was looking at pictures that we've taken and I was so blind to not notice how pretty her hair is or how curvy she is or how hypnotizing those blue eyes of her are. And don't twist my words because I really do like Sam. I know Sam has had her share of heartbreak and I can relate. The last thing I wanted to do was break her heart. I didn't kiss her out of pity. I kissed her because it felt right and for the first time, I really wanted to."
"That is so sweet, Freddie," she said. She adjusted herself so that she was laying on the beanbag on her stomach and her chin was resting on her crossed arms. I guess she wanted to be more comfortable. Something in my gut told me that Carly wanted to know since she saw Sam kiss me at school but she probably bit her tongue this time. Something told me that Carly probably realized that Sam really did like me and it was a serious issue. Not something that she should take lightly like we normally do.
"When she finally told me she liked me, it kind of hit me. If I were constantly telling someone that I hate them and that they are a loser, I'd be very frustrated with myself if I began to like them. Sam told me how hard it was for her to come to terms with her feelings because she always saw me as the opposite of what she looked for in a guy. And honestly, I feel the same. I was always into brunettes with a girlie style but yet, the tough blonde is the one I fell for. I didn't want her to feel more upset at herself if I rejected her. I wanted to give it a shot because I know what it's like to get rejected and I don't ever want to break her heart. And that kiss made me realize that I like Sam a lot more than I lead on to believe."
She was silent for a bit and it made me even more nervous.
"I'm sorry, Freddie," I heard her whisper. It was so soft and quiet that I almost missed.
"I'm sorry for rejecting you all those times. I'm sorry for ever taking advantage of those feelings when we first started iCarly. I didn't realize that I could ever hurt you. You always said that you were okay living with that constant pain but I should have never taken it lightly."
Her head was down as if she was ashamed. Carly was apologizing? Apologizing? For that? I reached for her hand and held it softly.
"Don't be. If it wasn't for your constant rejection, I would have never moved on. I would have been living the rest of my life by myself, pining after you and I would have lived a life of unhappiness. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have moved on. Blindness would have overtaken me and I would have never look at Sam the way I do. You're my best friend and I'm not upset about this. So don't feel bad."
I let go of her hand and she lifted her head up. I'm glad she didn't cry because I can't deal with crying females. I never know what to do to tell them that it's going to be okay when they are pouring an ocean out of their eyes.
"I'm glad that we can still be friends after all of this."
"You know, Freddie, we still have to talk about what happened after you got hit y that taco truck. I know we probably came to a silent agreement but I still think we need to talk about it."
I gulped. I don't know why but I tried to avoid this conversation. I guess I never saw myself actually talking to Carly about this. But we did date at some point and we put whatever we had on hold until my cast came off. We never resumed what we had going on so I felt like it was no use talking about it.
"I know," I gave in.
"What made you realize that you didn't want to be my boyfriend. And before you say anything, I know you didn't want a relationship with me. That's why I was so shocked at first."
"I really did want to date you back then, Carly. But… but… I don't know. Something didn't feel right when we finally kissed. For years I wanted to kiss you and when it finally happened, it just wasn't what I expected."
"Like when you and Sam kissed?"
"Something like that. We were both vulnerable and I guess I was used to not having those feelings returned that when we finally went out, it didn't feel right. Those feelings I wanted to put into having a relationship with you were not there but you seemed so sure that you liked me. Then Sam made me realize that it wasn't love. You were the most vulnerable and the last thing I wanted was to take advantage of you vulnerability for my own selfishness. It wasn't fair to both of us and I knew that in the end, we'd both end up hurt…"
I paused for a moment. I don't know why I was avoiding this conversation. I was basically pouring everything out to her. I continued.
"When everything became better, you were back to your boy crazy self. I didn't feel an ounce of nervousness when we went to get my cast taken off. It was then that I realized we would never work out. We've been close for too long to let our friendship lead to more."
My lips curved into a smile as I remembered the moment I realized that I was over Carly. Confusion took over me that night I broke up with her. I couldn't figure out why I let her go. I spent an entire night thinking about it. It was my dream to be Carly's second husband, give her children, and live happily ever after. But after finally getting a taste of what I always wanted, I just couldn't picture us being together anymore. It didn't feel right.
"You're right," she said. "I was too infatuated with the fact that you saved me the other day but when it all blew over, I too realized that it didn't feel right."
"I'm glad we're good now," I responded.
We stood from our bean bag chairs and we hugged for a moment. I felt like the luckiest guy in the world for having such a great best friend. When we pulled away, I heard an annoying beep coming from my pocket. It was my alarm.
"Oh, it's almost 9," Carly pointed out. "Ha ha. I can't believe you're almost seventeen and you still have a curfew when you hang out at my house."
"Don't made fun."
"I'll see you later, Freddie. I'm going to fix a few things before I go to bed. I'm glad we got to talk about this."
"Me too, Carly. Goodnight."
I waved goodbye to her and I made my way downstairs and out of my apartment. I stood against Carly's front door as I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I felt a huge weight being lifted off my shoulders.
I heard footsteps walking towards me followed by a loud burp. I smiled knowing that Sam was on her way back. I was only a little upset because she didn't come back earlier. A small goodnight would have to do and I was thankful that I at least got to see her a little bit before I had to go back to my apartment.
She finally turned the corner in the hall and she jumped when she saw me. I must have startled her a little.
"Whoa, Fredward. Were you waiting for me?"
"I just left. I have to be home very soon. But I'm glad I caught you just as I was leaving." A huge smile was plastered on my face.
Without saying anything, I walked up to her and bent down to hug her, pushing her gently until her back was against the wall. She immediately placed her hands around my neck as I pulled her closer. Her head was resting on my chest and my arms were around her lower back. I looked down to look at her and saw her close her eyes. She looked so peaceful. We didn't have to kiss all the time to show each other how we feel. Just holding her filled me up with some much love and happiness.
I lowered my head so that it was resting against hers and I closed my eyes. I would have never thought I'd ever be in this position, and with Sam of all people. But at that moment, nothing felt more right. No one could ever make me feel the way Sam does.
What did you guys think? If iCarly was more of a serious show for teenagers instead of a Nickelodeon comedy, I think stuff like this would have happened on the show. I really enjoyed writing this. Please let me know what you think.
My story, You Lose You Win will be updated soon. Once I update that, I will upload a one shot that I planned yesterday. It's going to be very different from what I normally write. It will be Seddie but it's going to leave you feeling bittersweet. And I might bump it up to an M rating because I want to try something new. The title of this one shot is called "Goodnight My Love" by Honor Society and it will be a songfic. If you find the song, let me know what you think. It's one of my favorite songs.
Until next time.