I got myself into a challenge to write ten fics with both Harry and mpreg on them. Great. This story is still WIP, but it's not supposed to be a much more than 10,000 words. So, I assume it'll get written quite soon ;)

Thanks to ReginaRiddle for the Triple-S, and to Winga & LupusDei for beta help :3

Warnings: AU (Fred's alive) & Bad language & EWE & Mature themes, including all sort of nasty things like rimming and top!Harry — oh, and Mpreg! I repeat: There's a pregnant man in this story! Should I also warn about slash?

Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns the Potters, not me. I'm just playing with them. Don't sue!


Chapter 1: 0/9


"I was just thinking... do you still have that U-No-Poo Antidote?"


"What do you want that for?"

Ron blushed bright red. "It's just..."

Fred and George glanced at each other, then identical smirks appeared on their faces.

"Could it be—"

"—that our ickle Ronniekins—"

"—is planning on losing his virginity?"

Ron huffed, annoyed. "Well, if you're just going to make fun—"

"No, no! It's important—"

"—in young man's life—"

"—to have proper—"

"—and clean—"

"—especially clean anal sex."

"You would know about it..." Ron muttered.

This time it was George whose cheeks flushed lightly. Nevertheless, his mischievous grin stayed plastered on his face.

"Why, yes, I would know. And might I add — so would Lee."

"And Angie," Fred added almost as an afterthought.

Both Ron and George turned to stare at him.

"What? She's adventurous!"

"I'm sure she is," Ron muttered. "Well, do you still have it?"

"Actually, no," Fred started but raised his hand, as Ron started to say something, and continued, "but we can make more of it."

Ron looked sceptical. "Just like that?"

"Well, you are our brother—"

"—our baby brother—"

"—and Harry did give us the start-up loan."

"So, we feel we owe him a clean butt-of-a-Weasley."

"Oh, shut up you two!" Ron huffed and threw a roll at George. "When?"

For a while, Fred and George just stared at each other. Shivers ran down Ron's back. Even after twenty-one years of knowing and suffering the twins, it was still creepy to see how they could talk to each other without saying a word.

"Not today. I'm going out with Lee," George said aloud, eventually, "and you have that thing with Angie."

"That I do," Fred complied.

"What thing?" Ron asked, curious.

"Nothing for you to worry about," Fred snapped.

"Yeah, you should just worry about the Sceptre of the Wizarding World."

Fred gave George a long, hard look.


"Sceptre? It doesn't even rhyme with the Saviour."

"Well, sorry. It's not my fault that you two got me distracted and thinking about Lee's tight buns."

"Whose tight what?" Lee asked, arriving in the kitchen.

Ron buried his head in his hands and wished he hadn't opened his mouth at all.


On Friday, though, Ron snatched impatiently the little parcel from Pig's leg, earning a few well aimed pecks on his hand from the tiny owl. Inside the packet, there was a minuscule bottle with a note.

Orally. We don't want to have to dig this out of your arse.

Take the Potion an hour before the Sceptr...Rapier arrives.

After finishing his business, which actually took an extremely short amount of time, Ron showered, shaved, and brushed his teeth. He drew the line on after-shave, though — he didn't want to appear too nervous about the night.



"Hi, you," Ron answered, blushing.

Harry grinned and stepped forward to give Ron a kiss. Unfortunately, Ron had the same idea, and they ended up colliding chin to cheek.

"Oops, sorry," Harry apologized, rubbing his cheek.

"S'alright," Ron mumbled, kneading his aching chin. He dropped an audible kiss on top of Harry's head and took the wine bottle off his hands. "Nice."

"Thanks. What's for dinner?"

"Umm," Ron hesitated, trying to remember what it was called.

"Your Mum made it?"


"Then it's edible, whatever it is."

"Hey!" Ron protested, smacking Harry's tightly-clad buttocks, while Harry ran past him to the kitchen, sniggering as he went.

In the end, they didn't even get to dessert before Ron's button-down was off, and he was busy sucking Harry's neck while trying to open the buttons of his jeans.

"Sofa," Harry groaned as Ron slid his hand into his pants.

"Ye-es!" Ron yelped as Harry pinched his nipple — hard.

Then it was all about heat and legs and arms and too many clothes getting on the way and sucking and rubbing and gripping until—

"Wait!" Ron pushed Harry off him.

"What?" Harry whined. "I'm horny!"

"I know, you dumb-ass," Ron quipped, squeezing Harry's leaking dick a bit harder. Harry moaned. "I just... Wanted to—"

"Oh, Ron, don't stop," Harry babbled incoherently.

Ron realised, he was wanking Harry as he spoke, and stopped the former immediately.

"I want you to come inside me."

Harry's cock twitched in Ron's hand, and his eyes widened with surprise.

"Are you—"


"Really? Because—"



"Fuck me, please."

That ended the discussion efficiently.

Ron felt bold as he laid his cheek against the sofa, spreading his legs.

"No, no," Harry protested immediately. "I want to see you come. Turn around. Here."

Harry fumbled around and placed a pillow under Ron's hips. Then he ceased to admire Ron spread-eagle in front of him.

"You know I love you?" he said softly.

"Yeah, yeah. Just fuck me already," Ron grinned and lifted his feet on Harry's shoulders.


"Well, I'm your git, aren't I?"

"You sure are," Harry admitted, positioning his throbbing cock at Ron's loosened hole. "You sure it fits?"

"Yeah. You're not that big."

Harry rolled his eyes, and stroke Ron's dick a couple of times.

"Don't want to hurt you."

"You won't, mate. Ever."

It did hurt a bit, but Ron's arse had felt somewhat numb since taking the potion — he figured the Antidote had something to do with that. It had also made his belly tingle in a strange way and his cock semi-erect even before Harry had arrived. Harry took care of it, eventually, and it felt so amazingly good that Ron cursed the last seven months they had been wasting their time on hand-jobs and blow-jobs.

Well, not on blow-jobs, really. It definitely wasn't a waste of time to have Harry's mouth clamped around his dick.

Afterwards, Harry lay on top of Ron and drew lazy circles on his chest with his finger.

"We forgot to use a condom."

"What's a condom?"

"A rubber thing-y you put on your dick before having sex."

"Why would you want to do that for?" Ron was puzzled.

"Well, it prevents diseases from spreading around."

"You were my first, and I was yours. No diseases. Besides, there's a spell to take care of that."

"Yeah," Harry grinned and leaned in to kiss Ron's chin. "And, it's not like we have to worry about me getting you pregnant."

Ron barked a laugh, but little did he know that right at the moment, something was happening inside him.

Something they never thought possible.

Something no one had ever thought possible.

While the two men snuggled in front of the fire, devil may care, the tingling in Ron's lower belly continued, guiding the confused sperm cells to breach a barrier they weren't even supposed to know about. The foreign cells fused with other, equally baffled sperm cells which didn't know how they had ended up there. Into a place that hadn't existed before that afternoon.

A womb.


End Note:

Seriously, don't forget to use a condom! We Muggles don't have "spells to take care of diseases" which can, in fact, be transmitted even if it's your first time :E