It's been three years since Tyler was killed in the 9/11 attacks. That was the worst day of my life. He was killed in his father's office in the north Tower, waiting for his father's arrival to reconcile after they had fallen away from each other because of Michael's suicide. It was sad to know that it never happened.
I was messed up after that. I cried and cried for hours, crying myself to sleep for days. I refused to talk to anyone except for Aidan. I didn't go home for weeks. I stayed at Aidan's apartment, which he lived in by himself now. I slept in Tyler's old room, remembering all of the things we shared together. It was hard to move on after him.
Aidan was no better than I was. He lost his best friend. He lost a brother. Aidan was the only person I could talk to, and vise versa. He and I helped each other move on.
Caroline was a different story. Her mother told me that she was refusing to go to school, to go anywhere. She locked herself in her room. She hardly talked and when she did, she was yelling at us to leave her alone. She was having nightmares and would wake up in the middle of the night screaming. Diane and Les felt so helpless. They forced Caroline to stay with Charles for a few days to get out of the house.
Charles tried to get her mind off of things, but it didn't help much, so he called Aidan and I to come over and try to help. I hadn't seen her since the funeral a few weeks before. She had changed so much. Her hair was a tangled mess, she was a bit paler from the lack of sunlight. Her usually happy face was drowned in pain and sorrow.
Shortly after the attacks, I started to get morning sickness and I was late. I went to the doctor and he confirmed that I was pregnant. I went back to the apartment and cried on the couch. Obviously it was Tyler's child. I hadn't cried for Tyler in weeks. I had accepted his death and moved on. I had officially moved in with Aidan. I had a job as a writer for the New York Times. Crying for him seemed like something new to me now. Those terrorists could rot in hell for taking the father of my child away from me now.
Aidan came home and saw mew crying. He walked over. "Ally, what's wrong?"
"I had my suspicions," I said after a sniffle. "I was right."
"Right about what? Come on, Ally, you're killing me."
He sat there with a confused expression.
He joined me on the couch. "What are you going to do?"
"I'm keeping it. There is no way I am giving up this baby."
That was three years ago. Aidan vowed that he would stay with me for everything, even though it wasn't his kid. He stayed true to his word.
He graduated with a degree in biochemistry. He got a decent paying job and we moved into a three bedroom house when I was five months pregnant. I found out I was having a boy and we started to buy more things for him. Clothes, a crib, a stroller, everything he needed. Aidan painted the nursery, set the crib up and did everything that I couldn't. He was there for the birth, along with Diane and my dad.
I had a beautiful baby boy on June 13th, 2002, which I named Tyler Aidan Craig. He looked just like his daddy. He had the same eyes and a head full of thick light brown hair. He had a nose matched his father's perfectly. I was glad that he looked more like his dad than me. I could have my own little piece of Tyler, still.
Now, he looked more and more like Tyler everyday. He acted like him too, sometimes. With a little Aidan mixed in, which was sometimes a bad thing. But he was the best kid in the world.
At almost four-years-old, Tyler knew who his daddy was and he knew that Aidan was not him. He called Aidan 'Uncle Aidan' and looked up to him so much. Aidan had changed so much in the past couple years. He was a more positive influence on my son than I have thought possible for him a few years ago.
He knew who Tyler was and why he wasn't here. I told him the truth, dumbing it down and making it just a bit more kid friendly though. He knew that Daddy was in an airplane that crashed and that he died. I told him that Tyler was in Heavan looking down and watching over him. I told him that Daddy would be so proud of him and that he was the best person that could be his daddy.
Though Tyler knew Aidan was not his father, he still looked at him like one. Aidan was there every step of the way. Through walking and talking, the first trip to the zoo, potty training, and teething, Aidan never stepped away. I knew Tyler would stay with me through everything, no matter how hard it was, how much sleep was lost or how many cuts and bruises he got from playing outside.
I could look at my son everyday and be reminded of his father. He looked and acted so much like him that I thought I was going to have my hands full with him when he was older. And living with Aidan, well, my hands were probably going to be even more full then with the girls.