Chaptar 1

AN: Dis is ma first story so I hop u lick it!1 Plez review so I no if I shuld update da story wif more chaptas! Thanx Mega n Luck 4 da help U rock !

Harry Porter was wlaking done da hall and den he saw Tyler Milloy and then he said "go 'way u bastard" I dnt lick u anymore I found sum1 knew!1" "OMFG NOOOoooo!1, I even changed ma name 4 u becuz it used to b Draco n that is nut a prep name lik Harry and that is y it is Tyler now…"

Den frum da grate hall Dmubledoor yelled quietly enugh fro only da hall autside to hear "eat ma shepards pie Postmaster General harry loked in da grate hall and ran toward it."

"Dnt wlk away" Tyler sed (seee becuz it used 2 b Drake-o)"

"Sht up" porter sad, "I ned to portect da Postmastr"! Dis made Tyler sad n tried 2 find a noose.

Harry went into da grate halle and did nut lick wut he saw:: it was Rainbow Wesel the biggest f-ing hippy Porter ever saw (but dey r best friends becux they shar clothezzz)

Dumbledoor was shooving shepards pie down Postmaster Generals throat. "Gedoff dat burd Harry" yelled sarcastly. This mad dumbldoor luk up n see Harry. WigHead the Postmaster General wus still in his handz cuz he was feeding her da sheepards pie!

Hairy run towards Dumbledoor n he still did nut letgo. Rainbow Wesel tryd to pool Postmaster frum da grips off albo. "Stup tryin 2 help Postmastr" sez Harry, only I can live 4eva!1" "But I shoulder be da one 2 help u prep Rainbow said" "U cannot help becuz u are a hippy!"

Rainbow wesel run frum da Grat hall to cry and probz smoke tentacula leafs (becuz hes a hippy n resents his jew faith)

Harry Porter gut close to da Postmaster and Dmubledoor immediatlie let go becus he new he wuld kill him sience he killed Lord of Darkness and lightness nd everything in between wen he was juzt a babie.

"I haf confessions to do in front of da class" (he dinks he is important so he macks anoosements wen he wants).

Meanwhile Postmaster stood on dmubleDoor shoulders becuz it is a burd n dosen't no dat dumble trys to feed it posionus pie!1. "I luv WigHead the Postmaster General becuz she is hot n brings me ma mail"

Then….. Rainbow Wesel burst into da Grate Hall slowly (becuz he is tryin to stash a-way the tentacula) n sed "But I luv more!"

Harry looked at da Postmastr n she looked aroused becuz she is loved. He new dis because her fathers were fluffed n looked more sexy den never. Porter felt a urghe to tak of his clofs".

Den! Tyler comed into da Hail n said "Why you resent ma luv for u when I charged ma name!" and that was all 4 da day.