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Guy walked around the village but the day was starting to get late and most of the shops were shutting down. The night was soon going to come and he had not even begun training. He checked the jonin tower but it was empty. He checked the aviation tower and nobody was around. The library and the bookstore were empty of anyone that could help him. He knew the only place he had left to look was the bar.
Walking up to the bar, Guy didn't have as much spring to his step as he had earlier. His chances of finding training were dim at best but he would never give up. He had to beat his student and show that he still had the power of youth. "You can't give up! You are Might Guy and the power of youth flows through your veins like a tiger in the jungle! RAWR!" After giving himself a little pep talk in his head, Guy felt better and walked in. Looking around the bar, he could see Shikaku Nara, Chōza Akimichi, and Inoichi Yamanaka sitting each with drinks in hand. He could tell that they were having a very good time if not too good of a time. Guy approached the three men and leaned between Choza and Inoichi. "Hey, Hey guys, how's it going? Would any of you three be able to help me with a technique I am having trouble mastering?" he asked them.
The three burst out laughing but gaining his composure, Inoichi spoke. "What technique do you need to learn?" he asked him. Guy smiled as he began his story, "I must learn the secret art of intercourse before this night is over, would either of the three of you happen to know this art?" he asked. Again, the three burst out laughing as Guy stood not understanding what they were finding so funny.
Choza took a big drink before he spoke "Well, I practiced that art last night! You gotta take advantage when the kids away" he joked as he elbowed Shikaku. Shikaku laughed and followed with a large swing of his own drink. "Yeah last night was a no go for me Shikamaru was home all night" he joked. Inoichi looked at Guy and could tell he wasn't joking. "So let me get this right, you need to learn intercourse tonight and you have never done it before?" he asked holding away a smirk.
Guy looked at the three of them before answering, "Well, I don't seem to remember if I have or not" he said. Choza laughed while Shikaku answered "Oh you would know if you did". Inoichi bit his lip to avoid a laugh. "Alright, Guy for you I will do you this favor!" Inoichi said as he looked around quickly and spotted a blonde-haired girl, who around the village, known as being a master of the oldest profession. Nodding to her, he added, "I will set you up with a master to teach you so go to the bathroom and fix your hair, give me ten minutes and meet a blond in the corner of the bar. She will teach you all you need to know," he told him. Guy eyes lit up with excitement as he bowed "I will do as you ask and thank you".
As Guy rushed off, Choza and Shikaku laughed even harder. Inoichi walked over to the girl he nodded and talked to her for a moment, handing her something and walked back to the group ordering another round. "You guys owe me for this!" he told them.
Guy was looking at his hair in the mirror and found that it looked as fantastic as ever. "Oh yeah, you look good!" he stated and made his way out of the bathroom. As he did, Temari walked into the bar and took a seat at the corner where the other blonde was going to sit. Neither of the three men paid any more attention to this as they had done their part of the job and were now back to joking and drinking.
As Guy walked up to Temari, he smiled showing off his brilliant teeth. "Well Temari, are you here to teach me?" he asked with the smile on his face growing larger. Temari groaned and looked at Guy "What is it?" she snapped. She had been spending this night alone, wanting to enjoy some time to herself for a change, without anyone being a puppy dog, and following her around. "Well, if you are the expert than it just be more of a sand technique I want to learn so let's get right to it!" he told her as he was ready to learn. As Temari was about to answer him, a large blond woman grabbed Guy by the back of the vest and dragged him out of the bar.
"Whoa! Lady Tsunade?" Guy said not sure why he was pulled from the bar before he could learn his technique. A half- drunk Tsunade spoke to him, "I have heard you all day and now if you just shut up I will show you what you're looking for now come on!" She then took hold his arm and partially dragged him back to the Hokage building. Watching from the corner of the bar, a man rushed out after them.
As Tsunade pulled Guy to her room, the man followed behind them and entered the building only to have the door closed just before he got there. Tsunade looked at Guy for a moment. "So you want to learn the secret art of intercourse do you? Well tonight you will learn a whole new meaning of dynamic entry" she told him and pushed him down on her bed.
"I don't understand, you will teach me this sacred of arts?" Guy asked her. Tsunade smiled slyly before she answered, "Only if you keep quiet and the lights are off," she told him. Just then, the door to the bedroom burst open. The white haired man known as Jiraiya entered the room in a huff.
Both Tsunade and Guy looked at him as he began to rant. "NOW JUST ONE MINUTE! I have been waiting all these years and you are just going to be with him of all people? No way missy! He ain't gonna drink my koolaid!" He shouted in protest as he started to walk over to Guy. Guy looked at him very confused. Before Jiraiya could take two steps, Tsunade backhanded him.
Jiraiya spun several times, trying to gain his balance, but was going too fast to be able to do so. Then it happened, he struck the wall face first and he could feel blood and maybe a missing tooth or even a broken nose, as he fell to the floor on his knees. He tried to move but wasn't able to do so and the night for him slowly turned black. "Now where were we?" Tsunade asked and reached for Guy.
Lee made it over to the Barbecue place and could see that the line was very long. He thought it would be best not to take his chances in finding what he was looking for here. As he was about to leave, he caught the glimpse of Sakura standing with Sai. He marveled at how beautiful she was and could even see pink flowers bursting from her hair as she stood in line with her arms behind her back talking with Sai. Shaking off the illusion, Lee made his approach, hoping that the most beautiful girl in the world would show him this technique and make all his dreams come true.
As Lee was walking up to Sai and Sakura, Ino had been getting all the gossip she could stand about Lee and how he was going around asking every girl for intercourse. She was now steaming mad and was sick of it. She had to put an end to this and fix him for the last time. Lee was going to see the wrath of Ino up close and personal.
"Sa-Sakura?" Lee said as he approached. Sakura turned and looked at Lee "What is it Lee?" she asked. She wasn't on a date so it was alright for Lee to come over but if it was a date she wouldn't want him to interfere. "Hello Sai, I wanted to ask if either of you would be able to help me master a technique" he asked. He was very nervous speaking with Sakura and he didn't feel as natural as he had all day.
Sakura looked at him, "Well Lee I can try to help you but can it wait till after we eat?" she asked. Sakura was hungry and training teamwork with Sai was hard as she was not used to him and it was different then with Sasuke and Naruto. Sai didn't speak he just looked at Lee and gave him a frail smile to show that he was welcome to speak. "I suppose It can" Lee said as he felt his last hope sinking away in the night like the sun had.
Sakura frowned than added, "What technique are you looking to learn?" she asked him, as she felt bad that he was searching so late for help and she knew he didn't know any techniques other than Taijutsu.
"Well, I was hoping that maybe you or Sai knew about a secret art known as intercourse and you could teach it to me." Lee told them. Sakura was taken back as she moved a step away, it hit her, what he had just asked her for.
Sai looked at Lee and his smile grew wider before he spoke his first words. "I have read many books on this topic. I believe that I can show you what you are looking for." Sai told him. Sakura at that point had become boiling man and needed to let off her steam.
"HOW DARE YOU ASK ME THAT YOU PERVERT!" Sakura said as she lifted her arm and pulled back her doubled up fist. Placing anger behind her attack she struck an unsuspecting Sai, who had moved slightly forward when he was talking. The fist connected with the cheek of Sai and the power behind it sent him into the air. He landed several feet behind Lee and with his face already swollen. Lee turned and watched him land, then turned again at hearing the words "CHA" called out.
Sakura pulled her arm back again but before she could let it go, a blonde girl came in and pulled Lee away. "I got this thanks" she called out to Sakura who now stood in the street stomping her feet and yelling. Ino pulled him down the street and around the corner. "What is a matter with you?" she asked angry.
Not sure, what she was talking about Lee looked at her blankly. "Why are you asking every girl in the village to have sex with you?" She question. He shook his head "I am not Ino" he told her. Ino shook her head and smirked as a devilish look came across her face. "Well I just saved your life from Sakura so you owe me! You're going to pay that back right now!" she told him pulling him in the direction of her house. Although unsure, Lee went willing to see what Ino had in store for him.