Hey guys! I just got a laptop! YEAAAAUUUH! .. Regular Show..

OK! Joke time is over, work time has started!

ZaGr ONE-SHOT! Or maybe not..


"Doom is not only a word used in many of your stupid video games in which you stupid students play and destroy your stupid brain cells! It's a word that describes the future of our world!" Ms Bitters spat her usually 'Doom' lecture to the class. Zim smiled eagerly, agreeing with a lot of what Ms Bitters was saying. Dib stared at Zim, as usual, trying to think of yet another way of exposing him for the alien he is.

"And with that, I have an 'important' news for you horrible demons." Bitter started "To reduce pain, our whole class will be taken to the beach tomorrow."

"YAAAY!" multiple kids screamed with joy. Zim raised his hand.

"Zim?" Bitters called on him.

"This... 'Beach'... Does it hurt?" Zim asked. Bitters raised an eyebrow.

"Zim.. There is so much wrong with you.."


"That's the bell, NOW! Remember to bring a bathing suit and sun block.. Or you could roast, I couldn't care less." Bitters said before disapearing in front of them.

Zim got up and nonculantly walked into the hallway, still confused on what this 'beach' is. He looked around, trying to find someone. Dib-Sister. For some reason, he didn't hate her as much as the other humans. He knew her name, Gaz, that was simple. But he needed to find out more about her.

"Hey, Space Boy!" Dib said, breaking Zim's thoughts.

"Dib-Human! My name is Zim, a normal, humanly, Earth name!" Zim said, trying to sound 'normal'. Dib rolled his eyes.

"You worried about the beach?" Dib asked with a big grin.

"OF COURSE! I love 'beaches'! They're very yummy!" Zim rubbed his tummy for effet.

".. Yummy? Zim.. Beaches are places with big bodies of water and sand.."

"WATER?" Zim began running around in circles "GAHHH! AHHH!"

"Calm down, Zim-Wad." a voice said. Zim stopped running and looked over at Dib and saw Gaz. He stood up a little straighter and fixed his hair.

"HELLO, Dib-Sister!" ZIm tried to be cool.

"My name's 'Gaz', learn it." Gaz said with no emotion.

Zim smirked. "Of course I've learned YOUR name, Gazelle."

"It's just Gaz!" she clenched her fists.

Zim blinked. "Don't you humans give each other animal names?"

"Yeah.." Dib started, kinda weirded out.

"Only when they're DATING!" Gaz almost screamed. She shook her head and walked away. "Idiot."

"Zim is not an idiot! Only.. Um.. Geh.." Zim quickly looked around, trying not to look like this 'idiot' Gaz speaks of. "Dib is!"

"Huh?" Dib screamed "I AM NOT!"


-At the beach-


Zim jumped out of the bus that drove the lucky kids to the beach. He looked around and saw all the water and shuddered. "Water.." Now, luckly he took a bath in paste today, multiple baths actually, but he didn't wanna take any chances. He turned and watched kids jump out of the bus and some kids gettin' thrown out of the windows. Poor worm babies. Zim looked over and saw Dib and Gaz walk out of the bus together. He grinned and walked over to them.

"I hate the beach." Gaz muttered to herself. She looked up and saw that Zim walked up to them.

"Dib-Human.. Gazelle.."

"I told you not to call me that!" Gaz growled. Zim grinned and bowed.

"As you wish." He looked at Dib and grinned bigger. "You may drown." Gaz rolled her eyes.

"If I do, you're going down with me.." Dib said calmly.

Zim took a step back. "Geh.. For your knowledge, I'm going to work on my 'tan'."

"What tan?" Dib asked, trying to get him to confess.

"I.. My.. That.. AHH!" Zim ran into the boys locker room, not knowing that Dib was also male and could easly follow him in there. Zim started to unpack the backpack he stole from his 'best friend', Keef. Too bad everyone hated Keef. Zim unpacked a blue pair of swim trucks, a blue and white stripped towel, and sun block. He quickly changed into 'his' trunks and ran outside to find Dib and Gaz laying on their towels, Dib on a plain blue one and Gaz on a purple one with grey skulls. Dib and Gaz looked up at Zim. Zim blinked.

"Am I not wearing this right?"

Gaz raised an eyebrow. "You are.. That's the thing.."

"i thought you were gonna put it on wrong.." Dib said, looking at Zim's trunks. Zim quickly covered his private square.

"HEY! Just because I'm not like your human body, doesn't mean i don't have.. Er.. Special spots!"

"You wish I was looking there!" Dib shouted in defence. Gaz rolled her eyes.

"How did you know how to put it on?"

Zim took a second to think. "Well, I saw some other male Earth-Stinks putting their's on.."

Dib and Gaz blushed.

".. What?" Zim asked, confused.

"You watched other guys get dressed?" Gaz asked "I didn't know you rolled that way.."

"What way?" Zim asked, still confused.

Gaz shook her head and slipped on a pair of dark purple sunglasses. "No way.."

"No way what?" Zim grinned, now just messing with her.

"Shut up, your voice is stupid.."

"It is not! Zim's voice is AMAAAZING!" Gaz waved her hand for Zim to go away, but Zim just sat next to her.

"Do you have any friends, Gazelle?" Zim asked, tilting his head.

"It's GAZ! And no, I don't NEED friends!" Gaz looked away from Zim. Did she really not want friends? Or was it that she COULDN'T make friends? Either way, she had none.

"What about Dib-Skunk?"

"NO! I HATE hanging around him! All he talks about is stupid paranormal stuff, like ghosts and aliens! All that head and such little brain.." Zim laughed, literally falling over onto the sand, holding his stomach, laughing. Gaz cracked a small grin.

"I can STILL hear you two!" Dib said, not even two feet away from them. That only caused Zim to laugh harder.

"M-my S-squeedlyspooch!" Zim managed to say, still holding his stomach.. Area.. ((A/N: He doesn't have a stomach.. He's Irken xD))

Gaz's grin turned into a smirk. "Sooo true.." Zim sat up next to Gaz.

"Aha.. I'm breathing again.." he looked at Gaz "You made the amazing ZIIIM laugh! Be honored!"

Gaz raised an eyebrow. "Honored? Why do you think that I should feel honored?"

"BECAUSE!" Zim put his hands on his (bare) chest "I am Zim!"

"And I'M Gaz, but you don't see me announcing it to the world." Gaz rolled her eyes.

Zim blinked and they sat in silence for a minute. ".. SO FEEL HONORED!" Zim screamed, breaking the silence.

"I don't." Gaz said with a grin.

Zim and Gaz sat in silence, again.

"So.." Zim started.

"So.." Gaz said with a flirty smile.

Dib facepalmed. "I can't believe.. GAZ! Zim likes you!"

Zim blushed. "WHAAA? NO I DON'T!"

"YOU DO TOO!" Dib smirked.

".. What?" Now it was Gaz's turn to be confused.






"DO! You're LYING!"

"An invader loves NO ONE!"

"Except my SISTER!"


"But you do!"

Zim growled. "Zim tells you to be silent! So SHUT UP!" Zim leaped forward and tackled Dib onto the ground.

Dib wrestled him and tried to get him off. "But it's TRUE!" Zim sighed and got up.

"Fine," he whispered "But don't tell her!"

"Why not?" Dib asked, getting up and fixing his hair. New girls comming soon, so he wanted to look his best. "She likes you too!"

"What?" Zim asked.

"She likes you!"


"Gaz likes you!"


Dib facepalmed. Zim always had a listening problem.


"She likes my what?"

"My gosh, Zim... Fine. Come over here.."

Zim slowly walked over to Dib, and Dib leaned in and whispered in his ear. A smile grew on Zim's face.


Gaz was laying on her towel, trying to get a tan. She had to beat up a few guys for staring at her, but she didn't care. She liked hurting people. Suddenly, a shadow casted over Gaz. She sat up. Zim. Oh great. Zim got down on one knee.

"Gaz, your face is as beautiful as it was the first day I meet you!"

Gaz blinked. "Wh-what?"

"My love for you is like a plastic rose; beautiful and it will never die!"

Gaz blushed. What was she suppose to do? Beat him up and break his heart? Admit that she likes him back? Zim stood up and started to lean toward her. Gaz blushed harder and grabbed her sun block.

"Your face is stupid!" she sprayed the sun block in Zim's face, causing him to scream in pain.

One of these days, he'll find out.