Disclaimer : I don't own Card Captor Sakura. It belongs to CLAMP.
Warning : There will be a slightly more wicked/arrogant characterization of Tomoyo. I am still not confident in making her a little out of her usual goody girl personality (NOT that I'm making her evil here) and I fear that her wickedness will not be accepted. But on the other hand, I am eager to dig this side from her, and this will be my first time portraying her like this.
Notes : This fanfiction will be done in Tomoyo's POV. I don't usually enjoy writing someone's POV, but in order to support Tomoyo's character here, I would need to use POV, so yeah… hope you enjoy! Oh, and probably you already know this, but in case you don't, schools in Japan start on April.
Summary : Daidouji-san is Daidouji-san. She has it all. / .EriolTomoyo. Set 6 years after CCS series end. 'In this high school, I am the princess. You are the prince. But you will NOT be my prince, Hiiragizawa-san.'
Sometimes I wondered why things were so…predictable.
"Daidouji-san, erm, we've been classmates f-for almost 3 years now. And I, well, I've been watching you…"
I wondered how one could get so many blessings.
"I-I mean… you're Daidouji-san. You're the most beautiful girl in t-this school…"
…So many gifts…
"A-and I know that you are very, very smart. A-and wise… No wonder you become the Vice President for the Student Council e-ever since we were in the first year. And even when you're the heiress of the Daidouji, you're still a genuinely k-kind girl…"
I wondered why there were no competitions and it got boring sometimes.
"For r-real, no other girl is as g-great as you…"
I wondered why things were so easy for me to have.
"A-and… I know that this may be very absurd of me t-to say, I mean, you… as the Princess, and me…as the common, random guy…"
I wondered why anything could fall into places, just the way I wanted it.
"But, I p-promise I will try my best to make you happy. So…"
The guy in front of me, Kanazawa from Class B, bowed his head to hide his tomato-red face. A futile attempt, really. I still could see those blushes all over his face.
"W-would you be… I-I mean… will you go out with me?"
And most times, I wondered why I was given the power to control mostly… well, most things.
With my number five smile (The 'oh-this-is-so-lovely-but…' smile), I spoke. "I'm so sorry, Kanazawa-san…"
Kanazawa understood immediately and randomly began his incoherent speeches that were so typically him (with the "erm" and the "…" and the shivers in each word). I originally intended to hear all his speeches out, but I gave up once I realized that he began to speak only "erm" and "sorry". A minute later, he bent down apologetically and rushed out of my sight. Well, there went the second confession of the month. And that day was still on the first week of the April.
I wondered why guys like him were just so typical; too typical.
Not for a Daidouji, definitely.
Chapter 1: The Princess and the Prince
Beta-reader: Aoi Itsuki (Thank you very much, dear!)
"I am a princess. All girls are."
From 'A Little Princess'
Frances Hodgson Burnett
"All girls are princesses.But sadly, not every girl realizes that she is a princess. You, on the other hand, Tomoyo, can't say such an excuse. You're a Daidouji. You have to have that pride of a princess. The pride of a queen."
Besides the classical "Love Sakura-chan, the way I, your mother, loves Nadeshiko-chan" , the earlier saying had been the only motherly advice from Daidouji Sonomi that I, Daidouji Tomoyo, could mostly had planted her insight and pride as a Daidouji to me ever since I was barely nine year old. And since they were the only things that Mother kept repeating over and over again (before she went abroad to France, Prague, Korea, America, and every place that ever existed in this planet…), the 2 principles were what I believed in with all my heart and soul.
Unlike the "Princess Principle" which I mastered after years and years of practice (having a true confidence about one self was not the most natural thing to do, but I finally achieved it), the "Loving Sakura-chan Principle" was easier to accomplish. Before I met my cousin for the first time, I had thought of how burdening it was to be destined to love somebody I hadn't even known before. But loving Sakura-chan was… perhaps the easiest thing that could happen to me oranybody. I supposed I didn't need the Amamiya nor the Daidouji blood to fall in love with my dear cousin. However, like a double-edged blade, my love towards Sakura was contrastingly beautiful and dangerous. In Elementary School, it hadn't been a problem. Such platonic love from two young girls was an admirable, cute thing.
But once we entered Junior High and once Li Syaoran came back from Hong Kong for real, I started to feel agitated and depressed. It did not take me a long time that such feeling was called jealousy.
When I was in the elementary school, this feeling was not present. Therefore, it took me a while to actually accept the feeling. Later on though, I cursed myself for it. I mean…I honestly wished for Sakura and Syaoran's happiness. I love Sakura and I care deeply about Syaoran. But on the other hand, I could not just swipe away the jealousy easily.
Perhaps it was a good thing that my mother gave me the doctrine of being the perfect Daidouji. A perfect Daidouji would always be selfless. A perfect Daidouji would not break her perfect smile just to antagonize on her unrequited love. These chants were repeated continuously in my head during my junior High school time and such doctrine was so strong that I finally could clear my head and strengthen my heart. Well, perhaps it was also due to time, but the Daidouji mantra clearly contributed in healing my pain.
But just when I recovered from my personal inner struggle, the second trial came to me.
To put a long (and painful) story short, Sakura decided on her own to follow Syaoran to Hong Kong and to live there (along with Touya-kun and Fujitaka-san –who couldn't live without their precious blossom).This had happened even before Junior High graduation.
Everything… changed ever since.
Yukito-san decided to take his master degree in Kyoto.
Rika and Terada-sensei had erm… well…did 'that' and bore the consequence. It had been a scandal, but Terada-sensei was a responsible man. To avoid those unfair gossips and rumors, he took Rika and their cute baby boy away out of Tomoeda to live in a small town not far from the town Yukito was at.
Chiharu and Yamazaki were not even in the same Junior High as Sakura, Syaoran, Rika, Naoko, and I went to. They also didn't go to the same High School. But I still exchanged some emails with Chiharu and we had gone to the Amusement Park together with Rika and Naoko last month, so well, we were still friends, if anyone asked.
Naoko was the only one who went to Tomoeda Private High School, the same school that I enrolled myself. We were good friends, but high school was high school. Life was life. Circumstances happened, situations changed, and even though that we sometimes still had lunch together, Naoko and I couldn't exactly be classified as "best friends". We were "good friends", not more not less.
The only person and the only thing that never changed was my mother. My mother was my mother –she never stayed in Tomoeda more than a week –if I were lucky. Even though I was blessed, I was not exactly a lucky person.
So basically, that was my life.
However I certainly didn't need anyone to pity my 'lonely-looking' life.
I am a Daidouji and pity was never something that people looked at me with.
That had been my thoughts before that day came.
Before he came.
First week of April had been one of the busiest weeks. First week of April meant coming back to school. Coming back to school meant change of class. Change of class meant change of classmates. These, however, hadn't been the trouble. Even though the guys from my twelfth grade class was now different from my eleventh grade class, I had already known some of them. And with something I recognized as one of the Daidouji gift, it was easy to make friends… and fans.
They were like moths to a classmates admired me, female classmates wanted to be as close as they could to me.
I had friends. Lots of them. It was different and a little lonely without Sakura-chan, but I had managed to pass two years without her, and so I was fine.
More than fine.
"Hime, Saionji-sensei has required your presence in her room," informed one of my male classmates, Tsukasa-san.
Erm, about the 'Hime' thing, believe me, it wasn't something that I made on my own. If I were to make my own nickname, I definitely wouldn't use the 'Hime' thing. I didn't say this to Tsukasa-san or the other guys who called me with this nickname though. That was to give them the salute for creating the pet name.
I masked my utter dislike towards the nickname with a small, polished laughter, "Why, Tsukasa-san, I have told you to stop calling me that…"
"Ah, no worries, Daidouji-sama, you deserve it!" This was spoken by one of my female admirers, Nina-san –who apparently had created another nickname for me. My friends in Junior High never called me with such honorific; although my bodyguards and maids often referred me as one. That was why it sounded a bit weird to be called that way by someone who was not only on the same age, but was also not working for you. Although it was nearly as overrated as the 'Hime' one, but since it contained half the truth (The 'Daidouji'), I could accept it better. I smiled at Nina-san (Smile number seven: the 'thank you') and turned to Tsukasa-san to speak to him again.
"Thank you for telling me. You said that Saionji-sensei called for me?"
"Yes, Hime," Tsukasa said in a bow.
"Oooh, I bet that Saionji-sensei is going to choose you as the Student Council President for this year! It's the first week of school!" a girl said.
"But in our school, isn't the Council President chosen every mid semester? Isn't it Tsubasa from eleventh grade, who was elected last September?" said another.
"Didn't you hear? Tsubasa was found stealing the answer sheets and selling them to the other students. He got suspended, and thus, there is a vacant position for the Student Body President until the next selection in September. I heard that the teachers don't want to entrust another eleventh grade student for the position anymore this year. The option goes to the twelfth grade student, and who else can fit the position better than you, Daidouji-sama?"
There were more talks here and there, but my thoughts had flown away. Yes, I have heard about the Tsubasa case and the other rumors. To be honest, it was quite tiring to work again this year as a Student Council Member. I had spent the previous year of my high school as the Vice President and it had been such an exhausting year. Besides, since I was a senior student at the moment, I had originally wanted to concentrate more to academic matters and study for the university entrance test.
"You don't have to worry, Daidouji-sama. If they choose you for the President, you will only have to work until September. You can use the remaining months to study for the university test preparation," commented Nina-san. Upon hearing this, I earnestly hoped that I hadn't spilled out my thoughts out loud (I don't think I did it). My thoughts had the tendency to be…slightly darker than what most people had expected. I just didn't want to crush their hope on me, ne?
So, after politely excusing myself from the small crowd that had gathered around me, I exited the classroom to go to Saionji-sensei's office. Saionji-sensei was the twelfth grade Math teacher, and she was also the teacher in charge for non-academic activities in our school, including extracurricular clubs, Student Council, et cetera. I arrived at her office, knocked, and pushed the door open once I heard the permission from the lady. Inviting myself in, I prepared myself for Saionji-sensei's speech.
This was where… erm… how to say it… 'The Event'.
And no, this was not because of something that I had expected.
In fact, I didn't see this one coming at all.
I couldn't recall the exact details, but I was sure that Saionji-sensei explained about the importance of a Student Council President's role, and how one should be fitted the most for it. She continued by explaining the long history of the student council, of the endless success it had brought upon holding the annual Culture Festival, the Sport Festival, and the daily tasks consisting of polling, papers, clubs-surveying, school-representation, and many, many others.
And then, it was when the words came.
"Seeing your flawless record, capability, and experiences, I know we all can depend on your help again this year. Congratulations, Miss Daidouji, for this semester, you are chosen once again to become the Vice President of Tomoeda Private High School."
And it was quite a record. Saionji-sensei had just witnessed my face went blank for three whole seconds.
I retaliated fast. Clearing my throat, I then spoke, "That is, surely, an honor for me. I would try my best not to disappoint you, Saionji-sensei."
"I'm sure you can do that, Miss Daidouji." She gave a nod.
And we were silenced.
"…Is there anything else you want to ask, Miss Daidouji? I'm sure you must have known all about running a student organization and –"
"Who's the President?" I couldn't help but to blurt out. I certainly hoped that my tone was normal. I hoped that I didn't sound like a crazy bitch whose jealousy was an obvious thing, because I was NOT. Really. I was… well…okay, perhaps a bit. But scratch the bitch and crazy thing. I was neither.
Saionji-sensei studied me for several seconds before saying, "You don't know him. But I hope that you two can cooperate well."
"I don't know him?" I asked, more flabbergasted. I was tempted to add 'Saionji-sensei, I have remembered all the names of the students here, thanks to my high IQ,' but I knew that it wouldn't make my best impression, so I killed those words on my tongue.
"Well, he said in his resume that he had stayed in Tomoeda once, but that was years ago…"
"You mean…he's not a student here?"
"He wasn't. But he is now. He has just become one though. He's a new transfer student from England. He should have graduated high school in flying colors, actually, but he decided to spend more time in a Japanese high school."
"Oh. A transfer student…" I nodded with a polite smile. Inside, I was seething with several unsatisfied questions. Primarily though, the question revolved on the issue of how could a transfer student get to be chosen as the Student Council President while Tomoeda Private High surely had a… more fitting candidate?
"Yes. I think it'll be good if you two could get along well. You two are going to work together anyway. So now, I'm going to introduce him to you," Saionji-sensei said as she looked to the other corner of her office. "You can stand and introduce yourself to the lady."
I turned around and for the first time realized that Saionji-sensei and I weren't the only occupants of the room. There was another figure who was already inside the room all along. I was stunned. I knew that I was a pretty perspective and sensitive girl, thus, it confused me of why I couldn't feel his presence earlier. He was sitting on that chair ever since I entered Saionji-sensei's office. It wasn't as if he was hiding, it was as if he just could make his presence just… undetectable like that.
But as he took more steps towards me and I came to study him more and more, things became clearer.
If anyone had thought that this guy was such a common, gloomy, unimpressive guy, then they had been wrong. For this guy was anything but ordinary.
After all, it was him.
A pair of indigo eyes was locked into mine and I felt the coldest tingle on my spine.
"Pleased to meet you, Daidouji-san."
I smiled my number 14 smile, one of the rarest that I had ever let out – a smile when I acknowledged someone, and not only because I know something, but also because I admitted something:
"Pleased to meet you too, Hiiragizawa-san."
Such a … day.
After Kanazawa's morning confession, the lessons, the talks inside Saionji-sensei's office, and the Student Council Meeting that Hiiragizawa Eriol conducted immediately (well, at least knowing that he was an efficient working leader, made it easier for me to accept that he had just beat me for the president position), I went back to my classroom to collect the schoolbag that I had left there. Since I was the only student council member who belonged from Class 3-A (which, unfortunately was the farthest-located class), I was alone in that room. Hiiragizawa-san wasn't placed in any class yet, but there was a high possibility that the teachers would put him in the A class, just like meant starting from tomorrow I would be seeing him more and more.
Not that I complained. Since this was THE Hiiragizawa-san, I could understand why he got the president position. Some student other members from Tsubasa's cabinet were still silently complaining about the position that a new transfer student could get. The complaints came from mostly the male members though – the female members were… more than an objective point of view, even I could tell that Hiiragizawa was… well, equally as good as I am when it came to leading an was a charismatic leader, an effective planner, and a realistic worker. Far better than any Student Council President that I had worked with up until now. I sighed. I knew he was the right man for the job, and even though I found it hard to admit my… 'lost' towards another, I had to be fair. He would make a fine leader and I couldn't be any more satisfied.
After putting all my books from my desk drawer to my bag, I glanced at my wristwatch and found out that it was 6.30 PM school gates would be closed soon, so I knew I had better hurry up and –
"Whoops, are you in a hurry, Daidouji-san?"
I stopped and realized that I almost bumped into someone. The masculine and nice mint scent emmiting from the person's body told me who it was.
Eriol Hiiragizawa smiled down at me and I smiled back (Smile number one: the polite smile. The one that I let out the most). I couldn't help but notice that the man before me had every reason to let out his unintended intimidating aura. He was such a beautiful man –not in a feminine way, but more in his own unique enigmatic way. With dark hair that I noticed was slightly messier than it had been in the fifth grade, sapphire eyes that were calm yet indescribable, a face that was paradoxically baby-faced yet mature at the same time… No wonder why the other female members of the student council found it easy to helplessly fall for him.
But, if Hiiragizawa-san thought that he could intimidate me, then he was wrong.
"You were looking for something, Hiiragizawa-san?" I asked.
"Actually, I come to speak to you, Daidouji-san. Do you have time?"
"I'd love to speak to you, but I'm afraid that we don't have enough time for that now. The school gate is –"
He pulled out something that dangled with a tingling sound and I looked up to find that he was holding a chain of keys.
"Being the Council President grants me extra facility," he grinned. "Saionji-sensei gave me the school gate key and the rest for the school building, so you don't have to worry that we'll be locked up inside our school."
I laughed politely while silently deliberating how power could give you immediate control. I hoped that Hiiragizawa-san didn't have that manipulative trait he had in him years ago and misuse the keys. "So… you said you wanted to speak to me?"
"Yes." He paused for a while to examine the empty classroom. The sun was setting and the shadowy effect it created on Hiiragizawa's figure made him… well… shadows did fit him, he looked… well… he looked…
A chuckle. "What are you doing, Daidouji-san?"
I blinked, and I realized that I was staring at him. Hopefully, I didn't let my mouth hang open. "I was waiting for you to speak, Hiiragizawa-san." I recovered. Good.
He cleared his throat and began, "Well… it's not easy for me to say. Since we've known each other for a long time and we've been good friends. Although I'm sorry that I didn't contact you that often."
"It's alright. I apologize too, Hiiragizawa-san," I said earnestly.
He nodded and soon resumed his speech. "I really hope that what I will say next will not affect our friendship. I also hope that it will not disturb the professionalism between us, since we're both working together in the Student Council. But I just… well… I really need to let out my feelings and… well," he chuckled as looking down to the floor. "This is really not easy to say…"
I was stunned.
The thing was… I knew this pattern.
I knew it too well.
Ever since the first day I stepped into the life of a High School student, I had experienced this.
It had taken forms in many various situations: sometimes in the quiet places like the library,others were so blatant like in the on-air school radio, another was from written words put into my shoe locker, most have happened after school in classrooms like this one, and maybe there were cases like what Kanazawa-san did to me earlier this morning. But the fact was, some things would remain the same: the stuttering, the situation, the atmosphere, the kind of speech…
I swore my face was even paler currently.
Oh God, Hiiragizawa-san was going to confess to me.
"We've been friends, and I… really respect you," he started again.
"I know that this may be too fast. Maybe you will be too shocked with this. After all, it's the first day that I appeared in front of you after so many years…"
Oh God, no. This was Hiiragizawa-san, Hiiragizawa-san! As handsome as he could be, he was still… Hiiragizawa-san…! I just couldn't! But how was I going to reject him? Oh no.. this was..this was…
He continued, "But I can't hold this feeling any longer. I need to let it out. I need you to know that I…" he took a deep breath.
And the thoughts ran in my head.
Sometimes I wondered why there were things that were so…
Hiiragizawa-san began once more, "I really, really dislike you."
Were my ears playing tricks on me? Because I thought I had just heard the most impossible –
"I can't stand how a woman can be as manipulative, as hypocritical, as arrogant as you are…"
I wondered why one could get so many blessings?
"I don't mean to be personal, really. But since we're going to work together for the next six months or so, I just want to let out my real feeling, my real sentiment towards I can work professionally without holding any burden. So that I don't have to be like you who has to mask up such fake polite smile. I don't want to be like you."
…So many gifts…
I felt the strangest sensation where my head seemed to be floating away to an unknown land. I felt like the situation seemed all so surreal, this classroom, this day, him…
But his words… were as real as they could be… that they almost made me choke, literally.
"It just… annoys me to see woman like you. One who thinks that she's the center of the world…"
Somebody, tell me that Hiiragizawa-san was playing some kind of joke!
I wondered why there were no competitions, it got boring sometimes.
"I'm not joking, Daidouji-san. It may seem hard for you who have been such a conceited girl all along to realize such harsh reality. But someone has to do it for you. I will do it for you."
I wondered why things were too easy for me to have.
"I hope you understand." Hiiragizawa-san continued giving me that smile, the smile that horrified me to no end. "This is for the best of our Student Council. This is so that we can both work in a democratic circumstance. Of course, you're free to share your thoughts about me. I am an open-minded man, I don't mind insults and critics." He paused before adding, "I hope you're the type to take critics well, Daidouji-san."
My mouth was left gaped open –something that I would never normally let myself do. But this was a special case. This was an emergency case.
The guy offered his hand in a gesture to ask me for a handshake. A mocking smile was present on his face. "I hope that there will be no grudges between us and that we'll be able to work together in a conducive, professional environment."
I wondered how anything could fall into places, just the way I wanted it.
"Now, handshake, Daidouji-san?"
And most times, I wondered why I was given the power to control mostly… well, most things.
For the first time since…since…ever, I felt that I had no control over myself. I couldn't control my words, I couldn't control my tongue, I couldn't control my thoughts, I couldn't control my hands, I couldn't control a single thing!
And I stood there, I didn't know for how long, but Hiiragizawa-san's words broke my trains of bewildered thoughts.
"Are you planning to stand up there all day and keep yourself locked inside the school until tomorrow? If that's your wish, I have no power to neglect. But I'm going home. See you tomorrow, Daidouji-san."
I wondered why guys like him were just so typical, too typical.
I didn't remember much, but when I was dragged back to reality, Hiiragizawa Eriol was already out of my sight. And my wristwatch showed the mortifying number of 7.25 PM.
It required me a complete 15 minutes after my realization of Hiiragizawa's disappearance to find my voice back and I started to mumble curses under my breath.
Something so un-Daidouji like to do.
Inside my heart, something stirred up. And only one thought ran all over my head continuously.
Not for a Daidouji, definitely.
That Hiiragizawa was a dead pulp for daring himself to challenge a Daidouji.
End of Chapter 1
Author's Notes: Well? I'm so nervous to find out your reactions. I hope my experiment project will be acceptable. This fic is… oh, I ran out of words. But I hope you can find the words to review? ^^ . Reviews are much appreciated, thanks for reading!