(Got this idea while washing my hands, weird huh. But it crashed through my writers block with a resounding karate chop, hua! Now I can focus on other writings that need to be worked on, like a chapter I've been promising my cousin... Yeah, I'll get to it. Read and enjoy! Ps. Please review!)
Title: Silent as a Cricket
Summary: Johnny is usually the quiet one. But when Johnny and Pony are in the lot together, Johnny definitely isn't as quiet as everyone thinks.
"YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!" She screamed at my father, before turning to me in her drunken state. "AND YOU! YOU LAZY FUCKING MISTAKE, GET OUT OF MY SIGHT BEFORE I MURDER YOU!"
I ducked, just barely avoiding the beer bottle she threw at my head. My father, standing next to me, punched me across the head, leaving my ears ringing as he literally picked me up by my neck and threw me outside.
I landed hard on my back. My head hit the ground, causing more ringing in my ears. I slowly sat up and stupidly shook my head hoping to clear it, only to foolishly make myself dizzy and the ringing worse. I got up and left the yard stumbling, I was surprised I wasn't beat more. I started walking towards the Curtis's. I was about a block away, and I could still hear my parents screaming at each other.
I finally got to there place, I could hear laughing inside. I almost didn't go in, I didn't belong here. But I went in anyway, they at least wouldn't hit me or scream at me. I grimaced internally when I saw that Mickey Mouse was on TV. I hate that mouse.
Everyone was there. Two-Bit sitting faithfully in front of Mickey. Soda and Steve playing cards. Darry was reading the paper. Dally appearing to be asleep on the couch, but he was tapping his foot so I knew he wasn't actually sleeping. And Pony was watching Mickey as well.
Dally was the first to notice I was there. I don't know how he did, but he did. His eyes were still closed as he spoke sarcastically.
"Pony, your boyfriend's here." Then, he added seriously, "Hey, Johnny-cake."
Everyone started laughing, except Pony, who blushed and protested. Then, they all said hey and asked how I was. I nodded and shrugged. Pony looked at me and shuddered.
"Johnny, is that blood?" Pony asked. I reached up to my head where it itched and pulled my hand back revealing red tinted fluid. I nodded as he grabbed my wrist and pulled me into the kitchen to clean the wound.
I smiled weakly at my secret boyfriend. His reaction to what Dally had said was the agreed reaction, we wouldn't tell them and they wouldn't find out.
He cleaned the wound but I wouldn't let him dress it. I wanted to talk but I didn't mind being quiet, I was always quiet. Pony must have sensed that I wanted to vent. He slipped his fingers under my chin and tilted my face up to him.
"Wanna talk, Johnny?" He whispered. I shrugged, but he knew me better and we walked back into the living room. "Johnny and I are going to the lot."
"Take a jacket, Pony." Pony nodded and quickly ran to his room, to grab a jacket.
"So, Johnny, why don't you sit down and watch Mickey with me? Take your mind off of things." Two-Bit said. "Why don't you watch with me?"
'Cause I hate the stupid little mouse. His high pitched voice and constant friendly attitude gives me a headache worse than my parents bashing my head in every night.' But of course I don't say anything, I just shrug.
"Maybe he doesn't like the stupid fuck. Maybe it gives him a headache just like it gives the rest of us a headache." Dally said, reading my thoughts. Two-Bit glared at him.
"Johnny don't hate Mickey, nobody hates Mickey." Two-Bit said complacently.
Dally grumbled something before going quiet, Pony came back in with a jacket. He led the way out of house with a 'Be back later.'
We walked to the lot in silence. Once we got there, I started a fire. I went to the beat up seat that some poor soul had dragged close to the fire pit. Pony took my hand and waited until I was ready to talk.
I rubbed my thumb over the skin on his hand. I took a small breath. "Two-Bit thinks I love Mickey."
He smiled, encouraging me to let it out. So I continued, "I really don't like that mouse though. I can't say anything against it because Two-Bit is so loyal to it he'd probably beat my face in."
Pony grimaced, "We can't have that, you mean too much to us, the gang, and you mean a lot to me. I wouldn't allow it. Besides Dally wouldn't either, he can't let down those who worship him." He smirked.
I laughed, "Yeah, Dally hates that mouse too, and he told Two-Bit that. He also told Two-Bit that I probably don't like it. Dally know a lot about things, more than anyone really thinks he does."
Pony nodded, he knew I idolized Dally. "I know, Johnny."
"Gosh, I really wish sometimes that I was more like Dally. If I was, I would be able to tell Two-Bit to take that stupid mouse of his else where and Two-Bit wouldn't be able to do anything about it because I wouldn't let him. And as for my parents, I'd give them a piece of my mind. Jeez, if I was more like Dally, they wouldn't push me around so much and beat the crap out of me so much."
Pony sighed and nodded. "You know, Pony. Usually I'm the quiet one, and you do the talking, but when it's just you and I our roles are backwards. That's kind of funny." I said with a quiet laugh.
He nodded again, letting out his own laugh. "Johnny, I think that's your parents fault, I mean they don't really allow you to talk at your house."
He said it quietly, I grimaced and shuddered. "Yeah, I know. I hate them so much. I mean I try to do everything right. I try to be a good son. I bring them beers when they seem to be running low. I pick up their empties. I keep the house in decent order so they aren't tripping over things and then cussing me out for it or beating me for it. I really try to avoid getting them mad and I really try to avoid them."
Pony shivered. "I know you do."
I couldn't stop the words now, I had opened the flood gates and I wasn't about to seal the dam at high tide. "Sometimes, after they've beaten me, I come out here. Sometimes they've beaten me so badly, that I wish for death to come, but it never does. And sometimes, when it doesn't, I think of the ways I could kill myself. It would be easy. I could cut my wrists or slice my throat. I could hang myself so if they wanted they could have an open casket. Ha. Or I could poison myself, there is a whole bunch of cleaning supplies under the sink. I could get in to my mother's pills or..."
"JOHNNY! Stop! Stop it! Don't talk like that. It's depressing. Besides the gang wouldn't be able to live without you. I wouldn't be able to live without you." Pony practically sobbed, begging me to stop talking about killing myself.
"Pony, I don't think I can really take much more of this though. The uncertainty. If I go home, I'm practically waiting for my father to take a swing at me or for my mother to throw things at me. If I stay out here, it's practically an invite to get jumped by the Socs. I know why they jump people though. It's the feeling of control that they like, the certainty that they can make someone squeal in terror. I swear to you Pony, I can't take much more of this." I put my face in my hands.
"Johnny, don't kill yourself. Please, I wouldn't be able to live without you. I wouldn't have anyone to turn to when Darry and I fight. Soda says he won't step in any more. So, please you can't kill yourself. Besides, the gang wouldn't be right if you weren't here, it would be unbalanced. And who would watch the sunsets with me?" Pony begged.
I sighed. I would hold out for him. I wouldn't kill myself until I was certain Pony would be okay without me. "I promise I won't kill myself Pony, as long as it makes you happy."
"You're going to be keeping that promise for a long time, Johnny. Because I'll be happy knowing you won't break it."
As long as keeping it made him happy, until he found other things that made him happy. He was a thirteen year old kid after all, his likes and dislikes could change tomorrow.
(so for the record I actually like Mickey, but I felt it was a good thing for Johnny to rant about. Read and review!)