Author's Note: This is a short piece from a longer story that I started writing with my sister, so she gets half-credit for the content, as well as full credit for the title. It's a discussion between Kurt and Blaine, in which they both secretly have feelings for one another. It takes place roughly a few months after they've met (in AU). Enjoy, and as always, reviews are very much loved! :)
Disclaimer: I do NOT own the show Glee.
~ Feels Like Dancing~
Laughing, Kurt swung his legs, forcing the swing higher and higher with each movement. Blaine, likewise, had worked his way up into the air, smiling at the mere fact that he and Kurt were actually silly enough to take over the swingset at an abandoned children's park. Nonetheless, it was sort of exhilarating in a way, with the warm, summer-afternoon breeze swooping past and leaving behind two boys with ruffled hair and flushed cheeks.
Kurt's laughter softened and he turned to look at Blaine as they flew through the wind. "This is kind of ridiculous," he pointed out.
"True," Blaine agreed, but kept on swinging. He paused thoughtfully. "You know, I always used to be terrified of jumping off the swings as a kid. From up high, I mean. My friends used to pick on me about it."
Kurt looked away, frowning in sudden concentration. Blaine wasn't sure what he was thinking, until he noticed that Kurt had picked up speed, soaring higher. He let out a quick, automatic gasp of fear as the realization sunk in. "Kurt, don't-"
But it was too late; Kurt had already leapt into the air, sailing through nothingness until finally coming to land on his feet a short distance away. He laughed, staggering for balance, and turned to face Blaine. "Your turn," he declared matter-of-factly.
Stubbornly, Blaine shook his head. "I'm a klutz when it comes to things like this. If I jump, I will undeniably find a way to kill myself in the process of coming back down."
Kurt rolled his eyes, hands on his hips. "Come on," he protested. "You can do it."
Blaine sighed, squeezing his eyes shut tight. Nothing to it but to quit hesitating, he decided, and flew from the swing without another thought. A moment of weightlessness, a confusing fall, and a muffled groan later, Blaine opened his eyes.
"Oh," he said, because apparently, he had somehow managed to land on top of Kurt, and they were both now pressed face-to-face in the grass.
"Yay, you did it," Kurt choked out, laughing breathlessly.
Blaine smiled a little. "Guess so."
Kurt stared up into Blaine's eyes, acutely aware of the fact that they had never been quite this close before. As their breathing began to even out, silence filled the little space between them and Blaine, sensing the building tension, quickly moved to roll off of Kurt. He landed on the ground, looking up to face the sky. "That was kind of fun, actually," he said with a chuckle.
Kurt smiled, turning to face him. "Good thing you trust my judgment."
For a moment, Kurt was silent. "Hey, Blaine?" he asked carefully, turning away again with a thoughtful expression.
"Have you ever liked a guy, but you weren't sure if he liked you back, and you weren't sure how to ask him?"
Blaine laughed wryly. "Yeah, of course I have. Story of my life. Why do you ask? Love troubles?" His heart sank a bit as he turned to look at the boy beside him, the boy with the huge heart and gorgeous blue eyes and killer singing voice. He probably wasn't any match for whatever sort of guy Kurt had his sights set out on; he was the best friend, the confidant, the teammate. That was all.
Sighing, Kurt blinked up at the sky. Blaine honestly had no idea who was really on his mind, did he? "A little, yes. He's just… he's a great guy. I'd hate to mess things up between us."
Blaine swallowed. "I know what you mean." He paused. "What's he like?"
Kurt smiled, eyes searching the sky. "Oh… you know, one of those obnoxiously charming types. Good-looking. Talented. Just… different." He shrugged, turning to face Blaine with curious eyes. "What about you?" Kurt asked. "Are you interested in anyone in particular?"
Blaine smiled softly, and Kurt knew in an instant that the answer was yes. And he knew it was a very definite yes, the kind of answer that generally didn't refer to guys like himself. Hopelessly, he listened to Blaine's response. "I do, actually. He's probably the most amazing person I've ever met. He's so kind, Kurt. Sweetest person you'll ever meet, once you get to know him. And I don't think he's even aware of how beautiful he is, but it's true." Blaine turned to meet Kurt's eyes. Did he have any suspicions that the boy Blaine had described was actually him? Probably not, Blaine thought sadly.
"I think I'm in love with him." It took Kurt a few moments to realize that the words had come from his own mouth. He hadn't even planned on saying them out loud, but then, at the same time… the statement felt very much correct. How long had he known it and just been afraid to admit it to himself?
How long had he been hiding from the fact that he was in love with Blaine Anderson?
Blaine let out a breath. So Kurt was pretty serious about this guy. The same way as he was serious about Kurt, maybe. He shifted his position a bit, turning over to rest on his side, facing Kurt fully. "What's it like?" he wondered.
Kurt raised an eyebrow, looking genuinely surprised. "Blaine," he said. "You've never been in love before?"
Blaine shrugged, frowning slightly. The truth was, he didn't know. He certainly knew what it felt like to like someone, to want them, to care for them. Or, at least, he had thought he knew. Then he met Kurt, and in came a million new emotions.
Smiling a little, Kurt looked to the sky and thought out loud. What he felt for Blaine… it was different than anything he had ever felt before, but… he knew himself; he knew songs and movies and books. He could recognize love when it was right there in front of him.
"It feels like…" Kurt paused, considering. "It feels like dancing. Like, sometimes you're going almost slowly enough to get bored, and sometimes things are so fast that you get dizzy. It's like you're going to be working with this one song, and you don't know the routine or the steps. You just have to trust that you can figure it out with the other person. You have to find a way to make the song work for you, and if you're lucky..." He shrugged, searching Blaine's eyes. "It's just really beautiful."
Blaine bit his lip, letting this all sink in. Wasn't this the ideal time to tell Kurt how he honestly felt? "Kurt, I…"
"I know. My metaphor sucked, didn't it?"
Blaine laughed, smacking Kurt playfully on the arm. "Shut up. You know I wasn't about to say that."
Kurt grinned. "Right," he answered teasingly.
Swallowing hard, Blaine searched Kurt's face. I love you, he said silently. I really love you. I'm just afraid because I've never felt this way before, and I don't want to ruin the amazing friendship we already have. You mean everything to me. One day, Blaine decided, he would ask Kurt to dance.