Here we are. The final chapter. Can you guys believe we're here? Me neither. it's incredibly long. Hope ya'll don't mind. ;)
But first, I was horribly remiss when it came to reviews last time.
PED: Your review made me smile and you just came up with the greatest phrase I've ever heard and I hope you won't mind that I borrowed it. Same story as the YouTube comment. I will remove it if you're uncomfortable but I felt it deserved to be shared.
XXHOPELESSXXXROMANTICXX: Flaming pitchforks are terrifying and I felt the hot pokers at the back of my neck until this was finished. So… thanks for the encouragement! ;)
ALE-ALI16: *blushes* It's nice to be missed. :) And since you say you never leave a review I want to doubly thank you for the one you left me.
NUMBER1KURTHUMMELFAN: I'm so sorry! Apologize to your sister for me. Tell her the meanie author didn't intend to make her sister cry. I now provide the closing chapter in the hopes of making up for all the cliffhangers I put not only her but all my readers through. She sounds like a sweet girl. ;)
ICLEMEYERLOVER: That was one of the most touching reviews I've ever received. Thank you so much. I can't explain what it means to know how much my story has affected you.
1GLEEFAN: My darling buddy. Your review was so beautiful and nearly moved me to tears. It was the perfect net to fall onto from my cliff and I was just wrapped so warmly in the blankets of your love and loyalty. Thank you.
I wish I could take the time to thank each and every one of you for everything you've said. Please know that every review I receive is treasured and loved and re-read often. Thank you all for your support and encouragement.
This final chapter is dedicated to my spectacular Twin MUSICALSARELIFE. Without her, this chapter wouldn't exist at all. Thank her by going to read her stuff. You can find her in my favorite authors.
Ok, I now present, *drum roll* KURT HUMMEL!
DISCLAIMER: Oh no, I totally have legal claims to Glee. I'm currently writing the scenes between Blaine and his sister (played by my incredibly talented twin) and all my stories are actually deleted scenes that will be released with the DVD's. (Note my blatant use of sarcasm)
Sealing the last lid on the last jar of his nightly skin routine, Kurt Hummel glances into the mirror (the same mirror he had been practicing sultry faces in little more than twenty-four hours ago), studying his rejuvenated skin, scrutinizing his appearance with a type of self-criticism that takes years to cultivate.
Too often for his comfort, Kurt's eyes drift to one of the drawers of his vanity.
It's like he can hear the pamphlets yelling for his attention.
Which is ridiculous because he read them already.
If Burt Hummel succeeds at one thing, it is follow-through.
Kurt loves his father dearly for stepping out of his comfort zone and getting this information and doing this despite the awkwardness and Kurt's resistance. After all, this had been exactly what he'd asked for after Rachel's party when his dad had found Blaine in Kurt's bed. Kurt meant what he said when he asked his dad to educate himself so that he could come to Burt for guidance about this.
He just hadn't meant now.
Honestly, where had this urgency for the Talk come from anyway? Kurt had been concerned when his dad had come into the kitchen because he looked (for lack of a better word) scared. Like something was going to happen to Kurt. When his dad laid out the pamphlets, it wasn't hard to figure out just what he thought was going to happen to his son.
But where would his dad get such an idea?
Did he think Kurt was going to get drunk at some party and go off with a stranger or something ridiculous like that? Please! Kurt is smarter than that.
And, contrary to popular belief, he's not that desperate.
Kurt sighs, wondering whether his dad (or Blaine for that matter. Seriously, what were the odds of having two Talks in one day?) had given any thought as to why Kurt was so reluctant to learn about sexual relations.
He's not afraid of it. Not in the least. Parts of it are weird to him and he's not fond of the idea of getting down and dirty but he wasn't going to go through life completely ignorant just to avoid some discomfort.
And he never planned to throw himself around. Kurt knew he wanted to wait until he was ready, until he was with the right guy (his talk with his dad had only reinforced this plan). When he felt he was ready, Kurt was going to get all the information he needed, maybe even learn with the boy he was going to give everything to.
Kurt always intended to educate himself. He just didn't want to do it now.
It isn't relevant now.
Burt Hummel wants his son to make that deep connection with the right person. Kurt wants that too. But his dad is throwing all these pamphlets at him and talking to Kurt all weekend like he thinks Kurt already has a stash of condoms under his bed and one in his wallet for the sake of spontaneity. Like he thinks Kurt actually has that special person.
Well, that's just not the case. Kurt is just as single as he's always been.
Finn is his stepbrother. Sam is as straight as can be (despite that hair). Blaine has made himself abundantly clear.
And it's not like the fact isn't constantly rubbed in his face as it is.
The basement incident. The duet competition. This weekend.
Just once, Kurt would like to be rejected and not have it end in a confrontation with his father.
At that pleasant thought, Kurt is back to studying himself in his mirror, noting all the ways he stands out, trying to remember that these make him special, only really able to recall the pain it causes him.
He sighs, knowing he can't prolong his Sunday any longer, and climbs into bed, absolutely dreading school tomorrow.
Dalton is safe. Kurt will forever be grateful for that, for being able to go to school without fear.
Dalton is also boring. The traditions are uninspiring. The uniforms are repressive. The entire Warbler democracy (so called) hears the group but drowns out the individual. For Prada's sake, the harmonies make it so a person can't even hear his own voice.
Most of the time, Kurt just wants to scream. But he can't.
Because his only other option than this gilded cage is a prison where nearly everyone is out for his blood.
The choice is obvious. As much as it feels like it, conforming won't kill him.
A buzzing from his bedside table yanks Kurt into the present. He grabs at his phone, reading the message he's just received.
Kurtsie! Wes is keeping secrets from me about Blainers. We cannot let this stand! May I threaten him with something from your side of the bathroom? – David
Since all that is currently in Kurt's bathroom at Dalton is some mint toothpaste, he sees no harm in letting David continue with his madness.
Sure. Just remember, we need him alive. – K
Why ruin his fun, right? At least someone is enjoying himself tonight.
Thanks Kurtsie! Don't worry. I'll torture the answers out of Wes. Then, once we know what's wrong with your boyfriend, you can kiss it all better. ;) – David
Kurt doesn't dignify that with an answer, putting his phone back on its charger and turning away from it.
But the damage has been done. Kurt sighs, staring at the blank wall opposite him.
What in the name of Patti LuPone had happened?
Kurt groans unhappily. He knows exactly what happened. He just can't believe he's been this stupid.
Confessing his feelings to Blaine had been a mistake. Ever since Valentine's Day, Kurt can feel the tension growing thicker between them. They've grown closer as friends but there is still something that keeps Blaine from being at total ease with Kurt like he used to be.
And it seems that Kurt is completely incapable of keeping his feelings for Blaine out of any interaction with the other boy. He can't stop blushing at little touches. Can't stop his heart from fluttering when he hears the soloist's voice. Can't stop dreaming about hazel eyes. Can't stop craving coffee because he's come to associate it with Blaine.
He can't even stop his feelings from getting in the way when it comes to arguments.
And here, Kurt takes a moment to berate himself for his behavior over this weekend.
He had barely gotten Blaine back after the alcohol/Rachel Berry/bisexual debacle and then he kicks Blaine out of his house?
Is he trying to lose his best friend?
Kurt heaves a heavy sigh, flipping onto his back and staring up at his ceiling.
That's just it, isn't it?
Blaine is only ever going to be Kurt's friend. And if Kurt doesn't learn to be content with it, he's going to lose it.
Curling in on himself, attempting to find sleep, Kurt knows what he has to do. Feeling sick to his stomach and an all too familiar ache in his heart, Kurt accepts that the time has come.
The time to get over Blaine Anderson.
Of course, as Kurt finds out that Monday morning, this is easier said than done.
After a full night of trying to let go of those feelings (sleep eluded him like the cruel mistress she is), Kurt takes one look at Blaine in the common room and feels them all come rushing back.
He rushes out to his first class because if he feels this strongly just by catching a glance of Blaine, he's not going to stand a chance if he actually talks to the other boy.
So he starts avoiding Blaine.
Again, easier said than done.
Blaine looks so hurt and all Kurt wants to do is run over to him and gather the curly-haired boy into a hug until he smiles again.
But, even if the text conversation from Saturday indicates that their friendship is just fine, it can't go on this way.
Kurt can't go on this way.
The week doesn't get any easier. Although, when the first day of moving on from Blaine ends with being pinned beneath said boy, Kurt doesn't know why he expected anything to get better.
He asks for space but Blaine seems determined to save their friendship. While Kurt appreciates the effort and is actually relieved to hear that he means that much to Blaine (even if it's not the way he wants to), their friendship is fine. Once Kurt is able to get over his feelings, he will go right back to his role of best friend without it destroying him a little inside (yes, trying not to care about Blaine the way he does is destroying him a lot inside but that's beside the point), so Blaine just needs to learn when to back off.
And then that damn journal gets in the way of everything.
Blaine stands there and tells Kurt that his opinion matters and could be voiced and looks so confused as to why Kurt is upset and Kurt just can't take it anymore.
He finally screams like he's been dying to do since he transferred.
Except it doesn't make anything better.
He still feels like he's suffocating, like he's going to explode, like he's coming apart at the seams.
Blaine won't let him leave. He keeps getting in the way, keeps trying to talk it out.
Why can't anyone leave him alone? Why couldn't the bullies at McKinley let him be? Why did Karofsky force Kurt to deal with his self-hatred? Why couldn't Finn let him sing with Sam? Why did New Directions force religion down his throat when his father was dying? Why did Mercedes have to try to make Kurt feel guilty when he'd finally found someone who understood? Why couldn't Dalton make him feel safe and free?
Why can't he sing? He just wants to sing. Why is that too much to ask for?
Kurt tries to run, needing just one moment to himself, just one moment when he doesn't have to put up a mask of contentedness.
Blaine grabs his arm and Kurt sees red.
Why couldn't Blaine just let Kurt go? Why did he insist on having this hold on Kurt? Couldn't he just let Kurt get over him in peace? Why did he insist on talking about this when there was just no point?
He lashes out. He strikes Blaine.
He regrets it immediately but that doesn't take it back.
Kurt wants to reach out to Blaine. All he wants is to be at his best friend's side.
He runs instead. Because everything is crumbling and Kurt really just needs to be alone.
He needs to be alone so he can just break. Then he can put himself back together again to face another day.
It's the only way he's been able to survive this long.
Kurt has become an expert at covering his cracks and chips. No one ever sees the lasting damage that's been done to him. A bitter fraction of him thinks that no one tries.
No one until Blaine.
Maybe that's why Kurt fell so hard for him. Maybe that's why they're such good friends.
It's definitely why Kurt can't be around Blaine right now.
Kurt spends most of that night locked in the bathroom he and David share, trying not to look at his shattered reflection.
By the time his roommate returns from dinner, Kurt has washed away the fractures and reassembled the broken pieces, holding them together with his moisturizers and lotions. With cold detachment (if he has no feelings, nothing can hurt them), he bids his roommate goodnight and settles into bed, hoping for a dreamless sleep.
The universe once again denies a simple request of Kurt Hummel and the porcelain boy awakes, rested but drained.
The rest of the day passes at a dull but speedy pace. Blaine doesn't approach Kurt again.
It's the respite that Kurt needs (more time to smooth the edges of his broken shards) but he still owes Blaine a proper apology. At the very least, Blaine deserves a solid reason as to why Kurt is avoiding the other boy.
He's not sure he can tell Blaine the real reason but he's never lied to Blaine before and isn't about to start now.
He still hasn't decided on what exactly to say when he almost trips over Blaine in the cafeteria during dinner. But, holding his head high, Kurt decides to start with the apology and see where it goes from there.
He's just about to get Blaine's attention when he sees a journal.
The journal he told Blaine to destroy.
Apparently, Blaine thinks destroy means study like Holy Scripture.
And Kurt just knows that when he sits down, Blaine will want to talk about it.
The only thing that has kept Kurt from snapping and burning Dalton to the ground has been using that journal as a hidden catharsis.
Having ideas that no one gets to see is easier then ideas no one wants to hear.
Blaine (the one who implanted the idea that Kurt needed to blend to fit in, in the first place) dragging Kurt's ideas out for public discussion (rejection) is just too much.
Kurt is halfway back to his dorm when his shock ebbs away, replaced by determined rage.
Blaine wants Kurt to voice his opinions?
Fine. Then that's just what he'll do.
Arriving at his dorm, Kurt decides that the first thing to go will be this damn uniform.
Kurt opens his closet and pulls out his scarves and ties and lapel pins and brooches. Then he goes into his bathroom and grabs every hair product he can carry and his makeup bag.
Laying these things on his bed, Kurt then goes to his beside table, opens the drawer and extracts his copy of Dalton Academy for Boys Book of Rules and Guidelines.
Kurt thought the idea laughable at first. Then he grew to abhor the book as much as the restrictions that lay within.
Now? It may just prove to be a map to freedom.
Kurt flips it open, turning pages violently until he stumbles upon uniform requirements.
The best way to begin any work of art is with a blank canvas. So Kurt sheds his blazer, rips the tie from his neck, steps out of his shoes and socks and begins undoing the buttons on his dress shirt, going over the description of proper dress with a fine tooth comb.
He has to wear the school issued blazer but there is nothing stated about tailoring this blazer to a more fashionable style. Nothing is said about the tie except that one must be worn. Maybe Kurt can exchange the Dalton tie for one of his own. Scarves aren't part of the list of appropriate attire but they aren't explicitly forbidden. Kurt knows there's a loophole in there somewhere.
The book says absolutely nothing about shoes. It's like Christmas came early.
Using both his bed and David's, Kurt lays out different combinations, picking out different shirts to wear beneath his blazer, and incorporating different accoutrements. Kurt also makes notes of articles that have been left in Lima for far too long.
Half these outfits probably aren't allowed and he will most likely be told to remove the personal items but Kurt couldn't care less by this point. He is through bending over backwards to please this place.
Dalton accepted Kurt Hummel and Kurt Hummel is exactly what it's going to get.
Suddenly, David is just outside the dorm and is yelling about something or other. Kurt can't be bothered to keep specifics.
All he knows is that while this project of his is incredibly liberating, it is not a calming process.
If anything he's more worked up than ever and has no patience for David's antics.
Kurt makes quick work of telling David that it is in his best interest to spend the evening elsewhere before returning to the rulebook to see what it says about hair.
And styling his hair actually is a calming process for Kurt, so as he runs his fingers through his brown locks, his pounding heart slows and his breathing returns to normal. Which is why he is doubly annoyed when there is a steady pounding on his door as someone demands entrance.
Without thinking, Kurt opens the door, sharp remark dying on his tongue in an instant.
Given his current temper, Kurt would not have wasted a second tearing into whoever had decided to disturb him. And even Blaine would have gotten a heavy dose of snark under normal circumstances.
But the look on Blaine's face stops Kurt dead.
He's never seen Blaine wear that look before.
Kurt is distracted for a brief second because the faintest strains of music are coming from somewhere and he just wants to be sure he's not the only one hearing it.
Blaine, seeming to snap into himself, pulls his headphones out of his ears, pocketing them, and putting an end to the mystery of the Music From Nowhere.
Kurt doesn't go back to annoyance, instead transitioning into confusion.
Blaine was taking a stroll, listening to music, and then decided to pound on Kurt's door like the world was ending?
The countertenor doesn't know what to do with the happy, relived sigh that just left Blaine. Nor does he have any idea what it is supposed to mean when Blaine said his name like that.
"Um… Hey." Blaine says awkwardly, smiling the way he does when he's unsure of himself.
"Hi." Kurt returns, eyeing his friend curiously.
Blaine swallows thickly, his mouth working fruitlessly to make a sound.
Kurt takes mercy on him and opens the door further.
"Come on in."
Blaine nods eagerly and steps into the dorm, wringing his hands, looking so nervous. At least, he does until he takes in the state of Kurt's room. For a moment, whatever is bothering Blaine seems to leave his mind as he surveys Kurt's work-in-progress splattered across the beds.
Kurt clears his throat, not in the mood to be judged.
"Blaine, what's going on?"
It seems to take the soloist a moment to remember Kurt beside him. The pale boy rolls his eyes at Blaine's short attention span (something both annoying and adorable about the other boy) and puts his hands on his hips and giving Blaine an expectant look.
But Blaine's eyes aren't focused on Kurt. At least not on his face. Blaine's hazel orbs are staring wide-eyed at Kurt's chest.
Confused (and irritated at being interrupted than ignored), Kurt followed the other boy's gaze, gasping when he saw his own bare skin.
Kurt is still wearing his white, long-sleeved button-up but the thin shirt is hanging loose and open on him. And, putting his hands on his hips had only pushed the shirt open further, fully exposing Kurt's torso.
A pink flush working steadily across his cheeks and up his neck, Kurt turns to the side, hiding himself from Blaine's eyes just as the soloist seems to remember his manners, his head snapping to the side, mumbling curses to himself (Kurt guesses for ungentlemanly conduct. It is rude to gawk, after all).
Kurt has his own string of mental curses running on loop as he begins to re-button his shirt. He had done up the third one down when he stops. Setting his jaw, Kurt takes a moment to rein in his anger.
This is his room, damn it!
If how Kurt conducts himself in the privacy of his own room makes Blaine uncomfortable, he can leave!
Kurt drops his hands from his shirt and whips around on Blaine, arms crossed, one eyebrow raised.
"What part of not now isn't getting through to you, Blaine?"
Blaine seems taken aback by the sudden change in Kurt's tone. "Kurt, I…"
But, Kurt decides he's not quite finished yet.
"What could possibly be so important that it can't wait until morning?"
"And why is it so dire that you talk to me right now despite me repeatedly asking for space…"
"Kurt, let me just…"
"And ignoring the state of my room clearly indicating that I am busy! What oh so significant thought has entered the head of Blaine Anderson tonight that he can't keep to himself for a couple of hours? What could be so remarkable that you need to bang on my door until I listen? What could you possibly need to share with me that…"
"I told your dad to give you the sex talk!"
Blaine (who cannot fathom why, of all things, he had to blurt that) tenses, obviously waiting for an explosion.
He isn't disappointed.
"YOU JUST WHAT? LOST YOUR MIND?"
"I just wanted to help."
"IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT CONSIDERED HELPING?"
"Please, Kurt, calm down."
"I AM CALM!"
Blaine just keeps his mouth shut about that one.
Kurt sucks in a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose.
"I am calm." He says through gritted teeth.
Blaine waits another few moments before speaking again. Just in case.
"I was worried about you."
"Because I couldn't be sexy?"
"Because you didn't know anything about sex. I didn't want you to be taken advantage of."
A dry humorless chuckle escapes Kurt. "You know, I'm really sick of being your charity case, Blaine."
"You heard me! I am not some helpless, lost little boy who needs you to hold my hand all the time! And where do you get off telling my dad to teach me about sex? Did you not hear me when I said I didn't want to talk about it? Or did you just not care?"
"Kurt, please! I…"
"You say you didn't want me to be taken advantage of? As kind and noble a thought as that is, it's completely impractical. I'm not in any danger. I don't plan on putting myself in danger."
"I know you're careful but…"
"And I know better than to throw myself around. What you and my dad seem insistent on ignoring is the fact that there's no one to throw myself at."
"What are you talking about?"
"Oh come on, Blaine! What's the whole reason you and I started talking about sex at all? Baby penguin, remember? It'll be a long time before I find someone."
Kurt looks down to the floor, trying to keep all the times he'd been dismissed from flashing before him.
"If I ever do." He mumbles to himself, not intending anyone to hear.
"What?" Blaine does anyway.
Kurt pinches the bridge of his nose, feeling the fight leaving him by the second.
The fight he needs to continue with his mission of getting himself back.
"Nothing. Just go Blaine. We'll talk tomorrow."
"No! Tell me what you just said." Blaine's fight, it seems, is only getting stronger.
Kurt shakes his head. "It's not important."
"Then tell me you don't mean it."
Kurt winces at that. What is it about Blaine that always makes him feel all his broken pieces?
Blaine surges forward when Kurt doesn't answer, placing his hands on the other boy's shoulders.
"Kurt, you have to know that isn't true. Nothing you've been saying lately is true. Please, tell me you know that."
The porcelain boy begins trembling. Kurt holds his breath, crosses his arms tighter across himself, and screws his eyes shut. He is breaking again and needs Blaine to leave so he can hold himself together.
Blaine proposes another solution.
Kurt is suddenly crushed against Blaine's chest, Blaine's strong arms cradling him like he's something precious. He buries his face into the crook between the other boy's neck and shoulder just as Blaine presses his nose into Kurt's hair, his lips hovering just over Kurt's ear.
They both are silent until the shaking subsides, Blaine never relenting in the fierceness of his embrace. Kurt has never felt closer to being whole.
Having his emotions back under control, Kurt knows he should pull back. He doesn't have the right to ask Blaine to hold him like this just for the sake of doing it. Blaine doesn't belong to him.
And he certainly doesn't belong to Blaine.
Yet Kurt still lingers, because although it hurts to think about, he can't help but love how well they fit together.
As long as Blaine doesn't push him away, Kurt is content to just stay here.
"I was scared."
Kurt tilts his head against Blaine's shoulder at his whisper. He would have looked the other boy in the eye but Blaine's arms had tightened significantly before his words.
Obviously he wants Kurt to stay where he is.
"All I could think about was someone hurting you. And the idea that someone could kills me. I can't protect you from Karofsky or the bullies but I thought I could protect you from this. And not because you're some pet project."
Blaine spits the term like it's vile, as if it disgusts him.
Kurt feels a little guilty for implying such a thing given how much the concept bothers Blaine.
"It's because I care about you. So much, Kurt. You have no idea how important you are to me."
Again, Blaine's arms tighten and he buries his nose deeper into Kurt's hair, as if the boy will disappear if he doesn't hold on tight enough.
Kurt lets himself be pulled close. He would have returned the show of affection but being pinned against Blaine means that his arms are trapped between them (small price to pay).
Instead, Kurt presses deeper into Blaine's shoulder.
"I know Blaine. I know you were just looking out for me. You're my best friend and you just wanted me to be safe. I'm sorry I…"
"Don't you dare apologize anymore."
Blaine tilts his head back enough for Kurt to be able to look the other boy in the eye without breaking their embrace.
"I'm the one who needs to apologize." Blaine's voice is nothing more than a whisper.
Kurt searches the hazel eyes (they're so close he can count the flecks of green in them) because there's that look again. A look he's never seen Blaine wear. A look he can't believe is focused on him of all people.
Blaine sucks in a shaky breath before speaking but his voice is now anything but. His words are steady and strong with conviction, leaving no room for argument.
"You are the most remarkable person I've ever met. You're so brave and compassionate and beautiful and your ideas blow me away and as well as I know you, there's always something new to discover and I want to spend everyday being surprised by you. There's no one else like you. I want everyone to see that but at the same time, I just want to keep you all to myself. I mean, I would never keep you from doing anything you wanted and I know you're ready to show the world exactly who you are. And I know once you find the spotlight it won't have the heart to ever leave you. I can't blame it because I don't think I can get through a single day without you anymore. I just hope you'll still want me by your side when everyone else finally sees you. And they will. I promise. You are astonishing and spectacular and awesome and I'm going to need to make up a word because these aren't doing you justice. You're…"
Blaine sighs, his eyes darting back and forth as he searches for the word that will convey everything he's thinking.
Kurt, although in possession of an impressive vocabulary, is too stunned to offer any help.
Blaine leans his forehead against Kurt's; looking deep into the other boy's eyes and soon all either boy sees is glasz or hazel.
"You are so special Kurt. That is the most amazing thing about you."
A type of ache fills Blaine's eyes, one that Kurt can almost feel himself.
A calloused but warm hand reaches up and Kurt's breath hitches as he feels the brush of skin, the backs of Blaine's fingers caressing the porcelain cheek.
"And I am so sorry I ever made you feel otherwise."
There is a moment of silence between them, the tension thrumming through their veins.
Then Blaine is dropping his hand and his gaze and his arm is loosening from around the countertenor and Kurt instantly feels empty without him.
Blaine is just about to turn away but Kurt Hummel has never been one to let someone else have the last word. And Blaine is not getting away from him this time.
Because even though he's never seen that look on Blaine before, he's worn it enough times to recognize it.
Kurt places a hand on Blaine's upper arm, waiting for the shorter boy to face him before cupping Blaine's jaw with his other hand.
And Kurt takes a moment to steel himself. He's offered his heart so many times only to have it returned to him as damaged goods. Each time he is stomped on, it takes longer to repair the harm. It's a wonder there's anything left at all. And there's only so much he can take. Kurt knows that if he offers it now, this will be the last time.
Whatever Blaine's reaction, if Kurt gives his heart now, he won't ever get it back.
And yet, all he can think is that Blaine Anderson is so, so worth it.
Kurt leans forward, brushing his lips against the corner of Blaine's mouth, trying to memorize how perfectly his jaw fits against Kurt's hand and how he smells of coffee and cinnamon and fresh laundry.
Blaine on the other hand, feels his eyes slide shut as he positively melts at the brief touch. He breathes deep, the way he's only come close to being able to do when he's with Kurt. His ears are ringing but there's something else.
Song lyrics he's heard a million times.
I kinda wanna be more than friends… I want the world to see you be with me… Love isn't silly at all… I thrill when you touch my hand
Somehow, this is the first time they really make sense.
Wait, why was Kurt pulling away? Come back.
"Blaine Darren Anderson. You don't just say things like that and walk away. You don't get to be that wonderful and then just…"
Blaine knows Kurt is still talking and it's rude to not pay attention.
But all he can think about is breathing again.
In the same fashion a man underwater will swim for the surface, Blaine reaches a hand around the back of Kurt's neck and pulls them together.
Their lips touch and Blaine sucks in a deep breath through his nose, inhaling Kurt's scent of vanilla and strawberries and a hint of mint toothpaste.
Then Kurt's arms are around his neck and Blaine responds with his own arms around Kurt's waist.
Kurt's mouth is moving against Blaine's and finally it's a kiss.
I finally found you, my missing puzzle piece. I'm complete.
God, Blaine really is an oblivious idiot.
He doesn't take too much time to dwell on that, though. He has more important things to concentrate on.
Like the fact that now he can taste that mint toothpaste.
Or Kurt's fingers playing with the curls at the nape of his neck.
Or how he can feel Kurt's heart hammering against his own because their chests are pressed so tightly together.
Or the simple fact that he is kissing and being kissed by Kurt Elizabeth Hummel.
That's the most important thought. Blaine decides to give it the focus it deserves.
After kissing each other breathless (an impressive feat as both participants have a singer's lung capacity), they part but do not separate.
Blaine's grin is ridiculously wide, his hazel eyes sparking with excitement and elation, his curls loose and bouncy making him look young and carefree, the way he feels inside.
Kurt's heart soars at knowing this look is because of him. He plans on putting it there for as long as Blaine will let him.
Kurt himself has a faint blush across his cheeks and his lips are shining and red and swollen. His eyes are bright blue and a toothless smile breaks across his face.
Blaine thinks he's never looked more radiant.
"We should talk." Kurt breathes.
Blaine slips easily into a puppy-dog pout. He liked what they were doing before. In fact, if they did that forever, Blaine would be quite content to never talk again.
Kurt lets out a small giggle as if he can read Blaine's thoughts (which isn't too far out of the question. They've always been close. Wevid has their suspicions).
"Hey, you're the one who was so desperate to talk. I'm finally in the mood to acquiesce your request."
Blaine sighs (cursing his puppy eyes for failing him) but nods.
Kurt smiles again and kisses Blaine's frown. "Now, now. If you behave, there might be a reward in it for you." Another peck.
Blaine grins immediately and presses a tender kiss to Kurt's smug smirk.
"I'll be good." He murmurs against Kurt's lips.
The pale boy hums in response and talking is postponed for another few minutes.
Breathless yet again, Kurt and Blaine clear enough space on Kurt's bed for them to sit.
They are both determined to stay there until they each say all they need to (and if a few kisses sneak their way in, so be it).
And they do.
They talk about the pamphlets, Kurt blushing bright red the whole time and Blaine unable to stop chuckling which would have normally annoyed the pale boy if Blaine's laughter weren't so infectious.
Blaine does end up sharing what he knows as Kurt shares what he's learned the past weekend.
Together, they learn that despite how into kissing Blaine is, he remains incredibly ticklish and that Kurt loves swallowing the laugher that bubbles out of the other boy when his hand brushes Blaine's side.
They talk about the fight after the party at Rachel's. Kurt states adamantly that what he'd said about bisexuals wasn't true. He also tears up, his voice choked, as he apologizes for striking Blaine, only able to hold back his sobs when Blaine pulls him against the shorter boy's chest and pours out deep regret for grabbing at Kurt so roughly. And then, Blaine says can't apologize enough for comparing Kurt to Karofsky. It was just lashing out from a place of hurt. It is a fault they share.
They also share finding immediate comfort in holding hands, threading their fingers together. It anchors them and keeps the defensive walls down.
They talk about Valentine's Day and Jeremiah. Blaine always knew he'd only had a simple crush. He had just wanted to be like every other teenage boy, to be infatuated and call it love, go on a date on a special day for couples just because he could. He just wanted to be like everyone else.
And suddenly it is clear why Dalton is a haven to Blaine and yet so suffocating for Kurt.
The conformity and restrictions bring all students to the same level. Everyone is treated the same.
It's all Blaine has ever wanted. Dalton was his chance to just be a teenage boy, nothing more or less. He just wants to fit in.
Kurt doesn't. All Kurt has ever wanted was a place for him to finally shine. He had been looking for a place that would stop holding him down, a place where people would stop trying to change who he is or telling him to hide it.
They try to talk a little deeper, discuss Blaine's inherent need to be liked or Kurt's desire to over turn apple carts, but end up clinging to each other instead.
Kurt will go back to McKinley. It's irrefutable now. Somehow, someway, he will go back to continue fighting, to keep being himself and shove all the hate right back in the bullies' faces. The way he would have been doing had it not been for Karofsky.
And here Blaine apologizes for 'Courage'. He never meant to bring all that turmoil into Kurt's life.
The pale boy leaps off the bed, grabbing Blaine's wrist and dragging the other boy over to his closet. Kurt opens the door and Blaine sucks in a sharp breath at seeing his own face staring back at him. Below his old school picture is a single word written out in magazine-collage style.
He glances over to Kurt, who, lost in memories, looks the same as that fallen angel Blaine had taken out for coffee all those months ago. The one who had felt miserable and invisible and saw no way out of his hell.
Kurt gives Blaine a tender smile, reaching out and taking the other boy's hand in his.
"You saved me."
There probably should have been more said, an expansion on what saving meant exactly, discussion on true cause and effect versus fate's inevitability.
Instead Blaine yanks Kurt into his arms and kisses him soundly.
Especially when Blaine finds that spot just under Kurt's ear that makes all tension leave the pale boy's body.
These talks continue covering Blaine's parents (Kurt gently wipes the tears of frustration from the shorter boy's cheeks, replacing the stains with gentle kisses), Kurt's connection to the New Directions (after thinking about the popular Brittana, Blaine thinks he knows why Kurt lashed out at bisexuals in general rather than just Blaine), the difference of Warblers in rehearsal and out (Kurt mentions something David calls Warbler-mode. Blaine will have to question Wevid about that later), and Blaine finally explains the real reason that 'Animal' was cut and how the concept of "Sexy" was dropped altogether.
"Well, it's a relief to know that I can't kill a whole number on my own." Kurt scoffs, rolling his eyes.
Of the course, the gesture is rather pointless, as Blaine can't see it since Kurt is lying with his head on the other boy's shoulder.
He feels Blaine's chest shake with his laugh, his arm around Kurt's waist squeezing as he drops a kiss to the top of his head (and Kurt could certainly get used to this) then nuzzling against the soft chestnut hair.
Blaine feels his heart pick up speed when he realizes that Kurt isn't saying a word about his now messed up hair, choosing instead to return the affection gesture against Blaine's shoulder and chest.
"Just the same, there are many federal crimes I would commit to see you do another Brittney Spears number"
Kurt laughs, but the sound peters out as he processes just what he's been told.
Blaine, utterly blissed-out, is slower on the uptake.
"Yeah. 'Toxic' was hot. You looked..."
Kurt shoots up into a sitting position, staring wide-eyed at Blaine, who finally realizes what he's just said.
"How do you know about that?" Kurt squeaks, all the blood draining from his face.
"I… uh… saw the video?" Blaine swallows, his throat suddenly dry and his side very cold without Kurt pressed against it.
"You found the YouTube channel?" Kurt whispers in horror.
"You know about that?" Blaine wonders if this feeling of shock will ever go away. He keeps waiting for his heart to restart.
"You spend enough Saturday nights alone, you become very well-acquainted with the Internet. But I didn't think anyone was actually watching those things! I figured Rachel had given up on those when they didn't immediately launch her into stardom."
Kurt bites his lip, only able to peak at Blaine from the corner of his eye as he tries to stop the current panic attack he's having.
"Which… which ones did you see?"
"'Push It'. 'Four Minutes'." Blaine is suddenly blushing bright red and his eyes have darkened significantly. "'Single Ladies'."
Kurt moans unhappily, bringing his knees to his chest and burying his face in his arms.
"This is humiliating!" He mumbles into his arms. "I can't believe we did that in a school assembly. And a fanny pack? What was I thinking? Ugh! The cheerio uniform is so disgusting. Stupid cheap polyester. I never should have let the girls talk me into doing that video again. A unitard? I can't believe they posted a video of my in a unitard. People worldwide can see me in a glitter vest. People worldwide can see me the one time I let Brittany style my hair. Oh, my hair!"
"It was sexy."
Kurt's head snaps up and he faces Blaine once again (embarrassed that he had actually forgotten that Blaine was there).
"Your hair looked great like that. And honestly, no one is going to remember the glitter vest after seeing those black jeans. The cheerleading uniform may be cheap but it is also flattering. Very flattering. Same with the fanny pack. How exactly do you do that thing with your hips? That should come with a warning label by the way. In fact, you owe me a new brain because you crawling on the floor melted mine. And how exactly are you that flexible? The leg thing you did for 'Bad Romance' was just… wow. If you can do that, not to mention dancing around in those shoes, you should definitely be working with David on our choreography. Also, if we show Wes 'Le Jazz Hot', he'll spend months coming up with new harmonies to feature your range and may just fall in love with you." Blaine scowls suddenly. "On second thought, let's keep Wes out of this."
"How many videos did you see, again?"
"All of them I think. But that's beside the point. Do you still have the hat from 'We Got The Funk'? Because you looked…"
Kurt, flattered and blushing beyond belief but quite ready for Blaine to stop, kisses the other boy.
But Blaine can feel that his argument isn't sinking in. He's never been particularly good with articulating his thoughts.
With Kurt's soft lips already pressed against his own, he figures a new tactic is in order.
Framing the pale boy's face in his hands, Blaine draws Kurt in deeper, unable to stop from grinning into the kiss when Kurt follows eagerly.
Using his tongue to open the kiss, Blaine lets one of his hands drift down, gliding over Kurt's side, pulling him closer and closer until there is no space between them.
One of Kurt's arms snakes its way around Blaine's neck, the other gripping his bicep. Blaine's hand on Kurt's face lowers to his neck, running his thumb over Kurt's smooth but strong jaw. His other hand lowers past Kurt's hip to the top of his thigh, resting there then squeezing.
Kurt's entire body reacts, pressing more firmly against Blaine, so much so that the boy is actually pushed onto his back.
Given both boys' experience level (considerably low given their age), one would think discomfort would settle in soon after the sudden progression from light touches to this.
However, as each boy trusted the other to put an immediate stop to things if one or the other was uncomfortable, neither felt any fear or pressure.
Wevid would also like to point out that since this had been building between them for about four months now, anyone who thought they were moving too fast needed their head examined (and to keep their abnormally large nose out of other people's business).
Blaine himself is quite pleased with the turn of events.
He has Kurt Hummel in his lap. Is he supposed to complain?
Kurt shifts his weight, not wanting to crush the shorter boy (wanting a better angle) until he is straddling Blaine, digging his fingers into the loose curls, giving a gentle experimental tug.
When Blaine moans wantonly into his mouth, Kurt considers the experiment a success.
Lungs screaming for air for the umpteenth time tonight, Kurt separates them, resting his forehead against Blaine's, panting heavily.
Blaine however, sees his opportunity to make up for all the chances he'd had but was too dense to take.
Kurt gave a small startled noise as Blaine kissed along his jaw but when Blaine finds that special spot beneath the other boy's ear, Kurt's body goes nearly boneless against his. Blaine can't help but grin victoriously against the pale skin before working his way down the swan-like neck.
Kurt is panting for a different reason now and just can't seem to get his breath back. He shuts his eyes, loosing himself to the feeling of full lips against his skin, tiny nips up and down the column of his neck, and the flick of a tongue against his pulse point.
He can feel Blaine's fingers at the top button of his shirt and whines in gratitude when the other boy makes quick work of opening it (thank gaga he'd only done up three buttons), allowing Blaine easy access to his collarbone.
Kurt gives tiny, breathy noises at each of Blaine's ministrations, getting lightheaded but not caring. And as good as this all feels, he needs those lips back on his.
Blaine lovingly runs his hand down Kurt's toned chest, fingers ghosting over his defined abs, (which had been captivating just to stare at. They were absolutely intoxicating to touch) making note to lavish those with attention later.
Although Blaine's not sure he'll ever want to leave Kurt's neck and collarbone. He hadn't really counted on how amazing Kurt would taste or how it would feel to hear Kurt moan while feeling the sound vibrate in his throat or how connected he felt to the other boy when he felt Kurt's pulse thrumming against his lips. Even just how warm Kurt is.
But suddenly that warmth is gone. And Blaine can't help but be a little frustrated.
If Kurt doesn't want to kiss anymore, Blaine's fine with slowing down but stop pulling away. It's cold when Kurt's gone. Blaine hates being cold.
Now Kurt is staring at him, as if the pale boy had been meaning to do something but had been stopped. He's giving Blaine a confused look that is both disbelieving and an attempt to not laugh.
What could he have done to deserve that look?
"Um, Blaine? Did you just…?"
Oh god no…
"Blaine, did you whimper just now?"
Blaine let his head fall back against Kurt's pillows, groaning in embarrassment.
"Yes, I did."
Kurt nods, still looking lost.
"Does this… happen often?"
"Increasingly." Blaine sighs. "Concerning you at least."
Blaine waits tensely for Kurt to either storm out or laugh (those seem to be the only reactions people have to him making that noise), not relishing the idea of either option.
Instead there is a tender kiss to his cheek.
"I'm still new to all of this." Kurt whispers into Blaine's ear, sending a shiver down the other boy's spine. "But I'll take that as a compliment."
Kurt gently pulls Blaine into a sitting position, still straddling him, and wraps an arm around Blaine's shoulders, his other hand tangling its fingers into black curls.
And then it's Kurt's lips on Blaine's skin.
And Blaine's jealousy of that lollipop (which he can now freely admit to) was totally justified.
Blaine can't even remember what a baby penguin is because all that exists is Kurt's mouth on his neck.
Anyone else would have suspected Kurt of starting off with shy feathery kisses or something equally soft and timid. To be honest, Blaine had also.
Instead Kurt segued easily into small, coy kitten licks that seem to have the sole purpose of torturing Blaine. When he skates over the junction between neck and shoulder, a violent shiver runs through Blaine's body, a deep moan escaping him. Kurt grins against Blaine's neck (the smug bastard) and focuses all his attention to that spot, tugging at the collar of his undershirt to gain better access. Blaine begins to completely fall apart as Kurt licks and kisses and nips at the now rather tender (therefore more sensitive) piece of skin while gently rolling his hips down on Blaine's lap and the curly-haired boy grabs those hips, clinging to them like a lifeline.
Simultaneously tugging Blaine's curls and rolling his hips, Kurt bites down on that spot, sucking harshly, ensuring a large bruise that will mark Blaine as his.
And this is how Blaine Anderson finally heard himself whimper.
It's a high sound (much higher than Blaine would have thought himself capable of), so puppy-like it's almost inhuman. It is also a sound of shameless need.
And it's not that hard to imagine what he needs exactly. This explains Wes's discomfort and also why he was so frustrated with his roommate. Even Blaine's hormones knew he wanted Kurt before Blaine did.
And from the way Blaine immediately pulls Kurt closer (which isn't really possible but it doesn't stop him from trying) by his hips and nuzzles against the pale boy's neck, not even trying to hide as more whimpers escape him, it's easy to see that pride is not an issue here. Which is probably what so amused David.
When, upon hearing a whimper, Kurt repeats whatever touch had elicited the response, Blaine decides to let each and every one loose without trepidation.
However, fidgety and impatient as always, Blaine is no longer content to just sit there as Kurt lights his nerves on fire.
He resumes his own work on Kurt's neck and collarbone. Reaching up one hand to push the shirt out of his way, Blaine discovers a great oversight on his part.
How had he never noticed Kurt's shoulders?
The expanse of milky skin before him is mouthwatering and Blaine immediately latches onto it, not missing the tiny whine from Kurt at the attention.
Kurt cards his fingers through black curls and Blaine wraps one arm around a trim waist while both boys use their free arms to pull Kurt out of his sleeve, Blaine already plotting the undoing of the other sleeve and Kurt is contemplating either lifting the undershirt off of Blaine or simply ripping it away from the shorter boy's body (much as he loves clothes, the second option is rather tempting).
After the sleeve is removed, Blaine tenderly kisses the freed shoulder and running his hand over the now exposed side before reaching for the second sleeve, ready for there to be nothing between him and Kurt.
The pale boy takes them on a small detour by pulling Blaine into another kiss.
Both boys loose themselves into this kiss, which is so different from the others.
There is no other word for this one.
It is positively filthy.
"OH MY WIZARD GOD!"
With wet, obscene pops, Kurt and Blaine separate and whip around to face the intruder.
Thad Hardwood stands in the doorway (half-eaten Red Vine on the floor before him) jaw dropped and eyes wide, looking like either a victim of a great shock or someone suffering a major stroke.
"Oh Thaddeus. I told you not to bug Kurtsie when he's in project-mode." Comes a voice from down the hall. A voice that is growing closer. "Last time I tried he threw a…"
David has now appeared in the doorway and caught sight of his roommate and dear friend.
Blaine examines his and Kurt's positions, trying to convince himself that it isn't as bad as it seems.
Except it really is.
Kurt's pale skin (while endlessly appealing to Blaine) betrays him with its sharp contrast to Blaine's red bite marks and the embarrassingly large bruises forming on Kurt's shoulder clearly broadcasting Blaine's liking for them.
Not to mention, Kurt is very nearly shirtless and still straddling Blaine.
The soloist himself has a more modest appearance given his own hickeys are hidden by either Kurt or his darker skin. However, the state of his hair and swollen lips can only make him appear debauched. Also, the positioning of his hands is hardly innocent (one still gripping what little of Kurt's shirt is still on his body and the other set rather low on Kurt's back, it's intended destination rather obvious).
A small part of him wonders why he and Kurt aren't changing position. This question is drowned out by the majority of Blaine that can't see any good reason to not have Kurt in his lap, no matter the circumstances.
For a long while, there is only silence between the four frozen boys.
David is the first to regain the power of speech (typical) as he carefully approaches the seated pair.
Blaine watches his friend come forward, peering at Kurt, eyeing the half-dressed boy. Rationally, he knows this is because prim and proper Kurt Hummel so wrecked is quite the sight. Just the same, Blaine feels that all too familiar growling in his chest. It takes control of Blaine's arm, making it tighten his hold on Kurt, trying to stake claim. He glares rather openly at David because the angry, possessive whatever-the-hell in his chest had finally been happy, practically purring when he'd had Kurt presses against him. And David had to spoil that all because he can never pass up the opportunity to annoy his little hobbit (as he always put it) and the worst part was that he was doing it on purpose. The bastard. After having his fun, David turns his attention to the boy beneath his roommate.
"Klaine?" He asks.
Kurt raises a questioning eyebrow such gibberish. He turns a questioning look to Blaine who has wide eyes but then (after sneaking a look at Kurt) smiles like someone had offered him daily doses of ice cream, music, and rainbows.
"Klaine." He confirms.
Kurt has only an instant to be confused before David is screaming with joy, making the pale boy leap out of his skin. He is then left to wonder why Blaine is merely smiling amusedly at his mental patient of a roommate.
Being startled this way brings Kurt back into the present and he decides that now is the time to stop straddling Blaine. Pulling his sleeve back on (free show's over, boys), he takes up a less salacious position, pressed against Blaine's side, wrapping an arm around the other boys midsection just as Blaine's arm goes around his shoulders.
David ignores the movement, still jumping around the dorm in absolute ecstasy.
"Yes, yes, yes! I knew it! I knew true love would conquer all! Fate knocks once my ass! Oh, Wesley is going to. Eat. His. Words!"
David now whips around on Klaine (and that's how he plans to refer to them for the rest of eternity), addressing them together (together!), ignoring Thad for now.
"Ok, you two are staying here tonight! I'll be with Wes. And since Thad here is in charge of room checks tonight, you guys are covered. And I'll be happy to cover for you if you want to miss a few classes tomorrow morning. Trust me! No one is going to miss your sexual tension."
Without waiting for an answer (but making note of the way Klaine leaned a little closer to each other at the thought of so much uninterrupted time together), David turned to Thad, who seems to have short-circuited.
"Come along, Thaddeus. I know Klaine going at it like rabbits is an awkward thing to walk in on but Wes might have some bleach for your eyes."
Thad merely nods hopefully and follows David's lead out of the room.
Kurt and Blaine exchange looks, alone once more. Neither is sure where to go as they are both blushing at David's brazen assessment of the situation but with bodies still humming with adrenaline. It's a limbo of sorts, and they don't move, not sure which way to tip the scale.
"KLAINE IS CANNON, BITCHES!"
Mood sufficiently killed, Blaine and Kurt just laugh.
"I guess we better get some sleep." Kurt recommends once their mirth has died down.
Blaine nods and Kurt reaches into a drawer pulling out a pair of clothes for Blaine to change into (no one is sleeping in uniform slacks. Not in Kurt Hummel's room) before heading to the bathroom for his moisturizing routine and to change his own clothes.
They decide not to mention the sudden shyness they both feel despite the mutual desire to be shirtless not ten minutes ago.
Blaine listens to Kurt humming to himself in the bathroom for a moment before changing, before they will be sleeping in the same bed (neither wanted to bother clearing off David's bed and they have fallen asleep together before), and he imagines being able to end every day like this, with the knowledge that the first thing he'll see in the morning will be Kurt.
He can't think of any better way to live.
Blaine stores those thoughts away (for now) and changes out of his slacks and undershirt.
Kurt had given him a pair of sweatpants (a little long on him but unbelievably soft) and a red football jersey.
Blaine examines the shirt with interest. Obviously it is McKinley's.
He spies the number three on his back in the closet mirror but can't remember if Kurt has ever mentioned his stepbrother's football number. Maybe it's his father's? He thinks Mr. Hummel played football.
The door opens and Blaine whips around to face Kurt coming out of the bathroom, smoothing his blue pajamas before looking up at the shorter boy, smiling instantly.
His smile turns into a sarcastic grin as his eyes fall on the jersey.
"If I thought the cheerio uniform was cheap, it is nothing compared to football gear." Kurt shudders adorably. "Thankfully, I was only subjected to it for one game."
Kurt grins, like this is a private joke. Blaine's face goes blank as the cogs in his head turn.
"One game? You… you played?" It still sounds weird and Blaine can only hope Kurt will clear this up.
Except he only looks as confused as Blaine feels.
"You said you saw 'Single Ladies'."
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"Well, how else would I have gotten onto the team?"
Blaine grabs at the jersey's collar, gesturing to it. "This is yours?"
Kurt nods. "I was McKinley's kicker."
Blaine glances at the mirror again (ignoring the pleasurable shiver he feels because wearing Kurt's clothes feels like a mark of ownership to match the bruise on his neck) and notices that while loose without the pads, it is rather small. It had to have belonged to a tiny player.
"I figured you had seen the footage from the game. Actually, I'm surprised you haven't. It spread like wildfire at McKinley."
Kurt shrugs to himself, trying not to think about the fact that since Blaine's interest is undoubtedly piqued, he will probably have to be the one to show it to Blaine.
"Since the videos were what prompted all this, it only seemed appropriate our clothes represent them. It's why I dug out the Mattress Land pajamas. I can't believe they still fit. That commercial was over a year ago."
"You were in a commercial?"
Kurt raises an eyebrow at Blaine. "I thought you said you saw all of the videos?"
Blaine stares at Kurt for a long while, as if trying to see every hidden aspect of the other boy. Kurt blushes and looks away, not sure how to handle such deep scrutiny.
A hand clasps around his wrist and Kurt looks up just as Blaine drags him to the bed and sits them together.
"Ok. We are not leaving here until I know everything there is to know about Kurt Hummel."
"The last time we tried this, it ended with two members of the Warbler council walking in on us giving into our rampant hormones."
"So? I fell off a horse two seconds after I was in the saddle. I still got back on and now I'm a polo champion."
"You're not going to try to mount me, are you?"
Blaine laughs and kisses Kurt's nose. "Not tonight. But I'm definitely looking forward to that ride." He throws in a wink for good measure.
The intense blush is reward enough.
A new thought occurs to Kurt. "Wait! You play polo? Why didn't I know this?"
"I only ride in the summer. Dalton is fancy but horses are a bit over the top."
"Oh yes, and the rest of Dalton is so understated with its grand staircases, marble floors, and mahogany tables."
Blaine laughs. God, how he's missed Kurt's sarcasm.
"You should come to the gym. You can see our subtle fencing team and humble lacrosse field."
"Do you play all of those as well?" Kurt is rolling his eyes in a teasing manner and is therefore utterly floored when Blaine nods.
"What other secrets are you keeping from me, Mr. Anderson?"
"Quid pro quo, Mr. Hummel." Blaine grins cheekily.
Kurt gives him a challenging look before leaning forward and kissing Blaine forcefully, plundering the other boy's mouth with his tongue, sucking on his bottom lip until Blaine is a simpering mess in his hands.
"Well?" He whispers confidently.
"I box too."
Kurt chuckles. "Of course you do." A small peck. "I practice sai swords."
And so the night goes. They trade secrets and memories and meaningless details.
They are only interrupted by two texts to Blaine's phone.
David is truly unbearable tonight. I blame you and I will not rest until I've made you pay. Also, he snatched that journal and looked inside. He won't tell me what it is but after his reaction, believe me, Kurt and I are going to have a loooong talk about whatever it is. See you guys at rehearsal tomorrow. – Wesley H.
Oh yeah. Congratulations on getting whacked by that clue-by-four. I'm happy for you, little hobbit. – Wesley H.
Blaine doesn't read the texts until morning as he'd had more important things to attend to that night.
Neither could pinpoint when they fell asleep.
They can tell you what position they were in.
It's the same one Kurt wakes up in early the next morning.
Legs tangled together, Kurt has an arm around Blaine's waist, keeping him close while his other hand rests on Blaine's chest, feeling the steady rhythm of the other boy's pulse. Blaine's arms cradle Kurt against him, nose buried in the chestnut hair.
It's the same position they always fall asleep in but different somehow.
And yet, it's not different at all.
Kurt gives a tiny sigh, knowing there is still a lot of talking ahead of them.
McKinley and Dalton still loom over their heads but it seems pointless to discuss them now. Or are they just fooling themselves into thinking that to preserve the honeymoon stage?
No matter. There are plenty of other heavy subjects they can face. That they will have to face.
Blaine is going to have to tell the story behind his claustrophobia.
Kurt is going to have to explain the scar on his neck.
Together they will have to tackle Blaine's brother who, on the path to success, tossed his sibling aside.
And Blaine is going to wonder why there are no Hummel's aside from Burt in Kurt's life.
There are smaller things. Annoyances or endearments. It's hard to tell from here.
Blaine is never going to stop trying to get Kurt into sports. He's never going to eat healthy. His hair will always be weighed down with gel. He is always going to be his oblivious, impatient, rambling self.
Kurt is never going to stop trying to get Blaine to care more about his skin. Ninety percent of what he says will be sarcasm. He will always keep a cold distance between him and anyone he doesn't trust (everyone aside from Burt and Blaine). And that trust will not be easily earned.
Maybe they can compromise. Maybe they can't.
There are going to be people who can't accept them. Everyday is going to be a fight.
They'll have to decide quickly if they mean enough to each other to swim upstream every single day.
It could be a sign or a coincidence. Regardless, as that thought passes through Kurt's mind, Blaine's arms tighten and he nuzzles against Kurt's hair, smiling in his sleep.
Kurt grins to himself, burrowing himself into Blaine's neck and shoulder, loosing himself to better ideas.
Like spending every night like this.
He can go watch Blaine fence or box. He can listen to Blaine explain the rules and strategies of lacrosse with his emphatic hand gestures and the glint in his eyes like a five-year-old with candy.
If (he knows it's a when but just wants to pretend right now) he goes back to McKinley, maybe he'll rejoin the cheerios and Blaine can come to pep rallies.
Spending anniversaries at the Lima Bean. Splitting cookies and stealing Blaine's biscotti even though Kurt said he only wanted coffee.
Kurt chuckles silently, knowing he's getting ahead of himself.
He hasn't even asked Blaine to be his boyfriend yet.
Shutting his eyes, Kurt presses himself against Blaine, content to let the morning continue without him for a while.
Right now, Kurt is nestled safely in the strong arms of a kind, smart, caring, handsome boy who's wearing Kurt's clothes while they sleep huddled under blankets. Everything else can wait.
Kurt presses a kiss to Blaine's neck, feeling the other boy make a soft, happy, sleepy noise. And he knows he's done for.
Kurt had been right. He'd offered his heart to Blaine and he is never going to get it back.
And that's perfectly all right.
After all, Kurt doesn't plan on giving back Blaine's heart any time soon.
And there you have it.
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Man. What a ride!