Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the song I Got You (Leona Lewis).
My inspiration was a So You Think You Can Dance Routine (Melanie and Marko)…I suggest YouTube (type I Got You SYTYCD). If the words do not, watching it will hopefully make the story come alive.
You walk through life completely unsuspecting. Unsuspecting, clueless …never knowing when the stars finally align and your life irrevocably changes. The transformations are sometimes are so subtle, you remain unsuspecting. Floating through life, going through the motions. Then one day, it hits you. Your life has changed in unfathomable ways. Although, sometimes, alterations resonate so deeply within there is no fraction of doubt life has taken another path. Really though, at the end of the day it doesn't matter whether change happens gradually or if it happens immediately. Change is change. And you can never go back. For that, I am thankful.
It was a train wreck. No matter how hard I tried to look away, I just couldn't. While I watched the wreckage from the second floor landing, my hand flew up to my mouth. A painfully sharp gasp erupted from my throat.
There in the middle of the dance floor stood Leah and Jake, their lips barely brushing.
The pair continued their sickening display of affection, unaware of the eerie silence sweeping through the room, replacing laughter and thumping bass from the music. Even the band Alice chose stared open-mouthed. A look of disbelief marred the lead singer's features.
Normally, a room full of high school juniors wouldn't bat an eye at Leah and Jake's dance floor activities. Hell, we have all been there at one point, some tonight during this very party. If I'm being more honest, I've seen more compromising positions in even more public places. It was nothing to gossip about…usually. Expected even.
This? Well, this had scandal written all over it.
As Leah's lips moved against Jake's, her boyfriend stood a mere foot away, two glasses of punch lay splattered at his feet.
My eyes rose from the spilled punch on his shoes to his face. Flutters of emotion ran across his smooth features, shock, anger, incredulity….finally settling on distressed.
I wanted to run to him, to comfort him, to shield him from the sympathetic stares. But I was frozen to my perch on the second floor, one hand gripping my mouth, the other gripping the railing in front of me.
I watched my best friend's heart break, in the middle of a party, honoring the twins' 17th birthday. His birthday.
Alice floated through the French doors, leading from the living room to the back yard. Her face twisted in displeasure as she noticed the silence in the room. Blissfully unaware of the recent developments, she made her way up to the small stage, ripping the microphone from Jasper's hands.
"Jasper…" Alice's berating tone changed as she followed Jasper's line of sight. The microphone screeched as it hit the stage, effectively breaking the silence. Disbelieving whispers exploded through the room, weaving from group to group.
The new commotion broke Leah and Jake's absorption in one another, but did little to split the duo apart. The twosome wore goofy grins as they gazed at each other. It may have been sweet, if it hadn't been so tragic.
Without a sound, Edward turned on his heel and disappeared into the blackness.
Alice barked orders as the party dispersed. Soft, scandalous mumblings played in surround sound until the large oak doors slammed, effectively silencing all sound.
Flittering around the room, Alice shut down the remnants of the party without batting an eye. The four tiered red cake decorated with whimsical 17's, stood in its original state. Heaps of gifts remained untouched on the gift table. Months of planning had gone into this party and Alice calmly and surely worked to erase any reminders, her face stony and void of regret.
Edward's pain was Alice's pain. Being his twin afforded her the opulence of knowing exactly what he needed and when. Now, he needed the party to disappear. So she made it happen, no questions asked.
Without my consent, my feet moved from my second floor watch post. I found myself wandering down the stairs and in the direction of the backyard, toward Edward.
In the far corner of the yard sat Edward's safe place, a large gazebo with a perfect view of Lake Crescent. The gazebo looked like a miniature version of the Cullen house. The structure had a large stone base with cedar planks enclosing plush forest green benches. Even the stairs and roof matched the house. Large dark slate stairs led up to the back of the house, twinkle lights wrapped around large oak trees and ceiling, illuminating the small hide-out.
As children, Edward and I had spent hours in the gazebo playing board games. On hot, sunny days we would drink Kool-Aid and look over the lake. In middle school, Edward became interested in astronomy, and we spent nights using a telescope to identify constellations in the night sky. When we entered high school, we spent Friday nights lying on the benches, discussing high school's greatest quandaries.
I approached the gazebo, removing my heels, feeling the cool grass between my toes. I climbed the few stairs carefully; the tile chilled the burn from the death traps.
Edward sat on the opposite stairs, his tall frame hunched over. His jacket was long gone, his undone tie hung loosely around his neck. His shoulders shook subtly and another bit of my heart broke for him. Sure, in all the years we had been friends, I have seen him shed tears a few times, but it was an unwelcome sight. Each time tears graced his handsome face, a little piece of my heart shattered. Edward was strong, self-assured, charming, tender, compassionate, and composed. Not much got to him and even less got him down. To see the hurt pour off him in waves broke my soul.
My feet ran to him before collapsing in a tight embrace. I held him tightly from behind, rocking us side to side as quiet sobs fractured the still night.
"Shhh…I got you." I murmured into the hair on the nape of his neck, my lips slightly brushing his bare skin.
He shivered slightly, his sobs quieting to snivels, then to pants. Edward relaxed into my embrace as we continued to sway side to side. His silky hair tickled my face and neck where his head rested on my shoulder while he looked up to the sky. Tear tracks glittered in the subtle lighting, making a trail from his glassy eyes to his jaw line.
Turning my head slightly, I brushed my lips to his temple. We sat quietly watching the moon's reflection in the lake as time passed slowly. Soon, Edward's breathing slowed and his eyes closed with a soft sigh. A blanket of satisfaction reigned as I held him, knowing he wouldn't rest for long and our time together would be over. I prayed his hurt would disappear and the reason for tears were stress, not heartache. I knew he hadn't been with Leah long, only a few months, but love wasn't measured by a calendar.
I didn't know how someone could hurt Edward like this. He was perfect.
I loved the way his gorgeous smile made me smile, without fail.
I loved the way his hair stood on end when I played with it while he laid his head in my lap during our Friday ramblings.
I loved how his belly laugh made me giggle.
I loved how his deep green eyes crinkled when he grinned.
I loved the way his nose flared and his eyes narrowed when he would get irritated.
I loved his hugs, how he would crush me to his chest and move from side to side.
I loved his spring rain scent, calm and clean.
I loved his silly jokes and references to pop culture.
I loved his nerdy side, glasses and all, when we would study together.
I loved when he rubbed his eyes when he was tired, reminding me of a much younger Edward.
I loved his playful side, his spontaneous side, his upset side, his secretive side, his whiny side, his tough side.
I loved him.
Too soon, his eyes opened and he sat up to stretch, causing me to release my hold on his body. Moving to his side, I took his hand and held it tightly.
He leaned back suddenly, taking me back with him, landing with a soft grunt on the hard cedar flooring.
"How could I be so…" he trailed off, shaking his head softly.
No words were said as I lifted myself up and stood from the step, still clutching his hand in mine. I pulled slightly, using my free hand to turn on the ceiling lights.
Leading Edward to the center of the gazebo, I looked up and smiled. The ceiling looks as though the stars were close enough touch.
I placed my head on his chest, winding my arms around his neck and swayed slowly. Edward's strong arms circled my waist pulling my body flush against his, softly singing a song.
A place to crash, I got you
No need to ask, I got you
Just get on the phone, I got you
Come and pick you up if I have to
What's weird about it is we're right at the end
I'm mad about it, just figured it out in my head
I'm proud to say I got you
I felt Edward's lips against my hair, forming a smile and my words faltered.
Before I could stop the verbal onslaught…
"Edward, the way you make me feel…I can't ignore it any longer. You make me feel nervous, eager, blissful…alive. All I have to do is see your face or hear your voice and…I feel like my heart is on a high-speed race. I've felt it for so long, I don't know…I guess I discounted it for normal feelings…"
I took a deep gulp of air and tilted my head up to look into his eyes.
"…Edward, it can't be normal. No one else evokes these feelings. Only you. I'm in love with you."
I watched as Edward's smile disappeared, a stunned expression in its place. My heart dropped. We had been friends since our diaper days…what had I done?
Thinking quickly, I began to backpedal.
"It's okay Edward, I'll be fine." I mumbled, tears stinging my eyes.
My mind raced as I tried to picture a life in which Edward wasn't there. I couldn't. My heart banged uncomfortably in my chest, my eyes throbbed with unshed tears. Refusing to let him see me upset, I wiggled out of his grasp and turned away.
I shook my head as I murmured, "I'm fine. I'm not falling apart. I'm not bitter. Just forget about it, consider our friendship here. I won't live through a big show. No need for a production. Let's forget…" trying to convince myself this wasn't the end of the world.
My voice broke pathetically as I continued, "Edward, remember I'm here for you when you need a place to run. For better or for worse, I got you. No matter what. You know this is love. And it's life. It's not like I can control this, or that you could control this. If it doesn't feel right to you, E…you're not losing me by telling me the truth. I got you."
With that, I turned and walked away.
I ambled around the house in a daze, not wanting to see any inhabitants of the Cullen home. The Cullen's were like family. Each step I took away from him the more I felt like I was losing the most significant being in my life.
I reached the circle drive, walking straight through the spouting ground fountains decorating the center of the driveway. The bright colored lights were vivid against the blackness of night as water spouted into the air. Not caring that my dress and leggings were now soaked, I stood in the middle of the fountain, looking at the familiar home.
My mind ran rampant with the consequences of my actions. Things between Edward and I would be tense from here on out. My relationship with Alice would likely change, for she was and would always be on Edward's side…along with Esme and Carlisle. Jasper was Alice's boyfriend and one of Edward's close friends…mine too. But surely he wouldn't…
My internal ramblings were cut short when I heard running footsteps. I turned toward the gravel crunching in time to see Edward running toward me. The fountain erupted again as Edward grabbed my face, pressing his lips to mine. Water dripped from our faces, making our lips slick as they moved together.
There were no fireworks. No stars. But everything ceased to exist as I tangled my fingers in Edward's drenched locks. His long fingers caressed my damp skin, pulling me impossibly closer.
Once again the fountain exploded, showering us with icy water. His hands moved from my face to my waist, pulling my body closer to his. Our tongues met and a strong current ran through my veins. The icy water did not suffice as a distraction as we stood under the stars, kissing.
Our lips slowed to soft, gentle pecks.
Edward dropped his forehead to mine, chuckling when the fountain burst, spraying us again.
" Bella, I'm such a moron. Earlier, I wasn't even upset about Leah. I was upset about the time I wasted on her. I saw you from the second floor landing. Your face. You looked devastated. I knew then, anyone who felt so strongly about my problems was worth the risk."
"I have had such strong feelings for you for so long, but I wasn't willing to mess up our friendship…because I wasn't sure if you reciprocated. But tonight, I knew I had to do something. I was so scared I had lost any chances of being with you, it just killed me."
He continued in a whisper, "when you said you loved me, and you would always be there for me, even if I didn't feel the same…I don't know…it just made me feel complete. Like I had found the other half to my whole. I couldn't wrap my head around it. It felt like a dream."
"And then you were gone. I don't feel complete without you, Bella. I just don't. You are it for me. My soul mate. I wasted so much time, even though I knew deep inside I belonged with you. You are the one who calms me, who makes me feel well again when I am sick, who makes me laugh, who can make me distressed enough to cry. It's exciting. It's amazing. It's scary. It's love."
I nodded my head in agreement because I felt the same way. Around him, my emotions were a roller coaster, but I had never felt more alive. More excited to be living.
My lips brushed his gently. Again. Again. And Again. Water sprayed us countless times, but neither one of us could be bothered by the wetness seeping through our clothing.
The heavy oak doors creaked open in the distance as our kisses continued, becoming more and more fervent. Edward picked me up off the ground and spun me around laughing against my lips. I couldn't help but giggle myself at his carefree display.
Squeals and high-fives rang through the night air. The spinning stopped abruptly, my legs still swinging mid-air. Our heads whipped toward the front doors, looking for the interruption. There on the porch swing sat Esme and Carlisle, their face blazing with smiles. In the doorway stood Alice and Jasper, grinning widely.
"About time, son" shouted Carlisle, chuckling.
Edward and I blushed, knowing Carlisle and Esme had probably watched the entire spectacle.
As the fountain erupted again, laughter rang out. And another piece of me fit back into place.
I got him.
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