Hello! This is a one-shot related to my story Chip Away the Stone. It's the date between Ren and Ron, which some people said they wanted to see, and, really, I desperately wanted to write this! ^^ I just love Ren so much! And though I don't really like Ron, I think they're adorable together!
Anyways, the song fits nicely, so I decided to make it a songfic. Plus, I fiercely love music. Enjoy!
I don't own Harry Potter or the song Angel by Aerosmith
Don't know what I'm gonna do about this feelin' inside
Yes it's true, lonliness took me for a ride
Without your love, I'm nothing but a beggar
Without your love, a dog without a bone
What can I do, I'm sleeping in this bed alone?
Ever since the moment when that stupid curse was lifted, I've only been able to think about how I'd lost Hermione. I couldn't stop thinking about it. It was this awful feeling I had that I could have changed this entire situation. And you know what? If I hadn't been hit with that spell, then Hermione would never have gotten hurt, would never have gotten sick, would never have had to marry Sirius, would never have almost died, never have lost her baby, never have had to go in search of Sirius...
If it weren't for me, Hermione would have been happy and healthy, and we'd be living somewhere in the country with a baby. I could protect her just as well as Sirius could. Well, at least, that's what I liked to think.
I still felt so alone everytime I thought about it. I had no one. Hermione wasn't married and sleeping with me every night, she was married to Sirius, ex-marauder, with all of his manipulating, charming, devious ways, and sleeping in his bed. It hurt a lot more than it should have after so many months.
And then...my mind started to wander one night, and I thought of the pretty young girl living with Hermione. She'd been the one to save me without even asking anyone what was wrong. She could just tell I didn't want to be cursed, and the others were getting dreadfully tired of taking care of a drunk kid. I'd realised with a huge jolt how pretty she was, and even because she was a Siren, it was different from the beauty of other Sirens. It didn't make me want to get her in my bed, it made me want to get to know her. And I realised how kind and funny she was, and how determined she was. Even if she wasn't the fastest learner, that was okay because she was deadset on mastering everything human.
That thought flickered through my mind for a little while. I couldn't be having these thoughts! Ren's not even human!
And one time, I caught her singing in the bathroom and...nothing. Sure, there was a slight tug in my chest, nearly forcing me to go to her, but that was all, and it was easy to break away. If what I'd recently been studying about Sirens was true, that shouldn't have happened. I should have been rendered incapable of even using my feet unless I was heading in the direction of whomever was singing.
I asked Remus about it. He was the smartest guy I knew, and he knew even more about Sirens, having previously been a DADA professor. But he didn't know-he only had a brief understanding. He referred me to to Professor Snape, who had done more than enough necessary studying for the DADA professor position.
Snape told me what was happening, and I couldn't have been more thrilled. Human? A soul, a conscience? She would have those things, too?
I wondered if she would be unhappy about this. During the times I'd talked to her about her past, she always told me how much she liked the ocean. But she also told me how much she enjoyed being with us, up on the surface.
Now, here I am, about to pick Ren up for our date at my exgirlfriends house. It still hurt, Hermione being with Sirius, but I knew both that there was no choice, that she still loved me, and that I would just have to get over her.
I knocked on the door to their flat, and Sirius welcomed me in with a friendly enough smile. Ever since I'd decked him in the face, we obviously haven't gotten along to well, but Sirius, being Sirius, let bygones be bygones for the good of the Order.
"Hey, there, Weasley," he said, stepping out of the way so I could come through the door. "Ren and Hermione are still in Ren's room, trying to find something to wear. I think Ginny may be in there too, and that's why it's taking so long."
Sirius laughed at his own joke as he walked across the living room to the kitchen and began rumaging through some drawers. I tried to smile shakily. I was pretty nervous, oddly enough. I wasn't sure why. I mean, I'd spent time alone with Ren before, hadn't I? It was probably because we'd never spent time together alone. I swallowed nervously and followed Sirius into the kitchen.
He laughed at my expression and pulled something out from beneath the counter. "Firewhiskey?" He offered. "It'll help witht he nerves."
With a sharp nod, I took the glass he extended to me and downed it all in one gulp. "Thanks," I said.
Sirius chuckled. "No problem, kid."
Sirius and I sat in an uncomfortable silence for a moment or two, when Ginny stepped out through the door to what I'd always naturally assumed was a closet. She grinned at the both of us and pressed her fingertips together. She took a deep breath, grinning, and I knew that meant we'd be given the honour of an obnoxiously long speech.
"Well, men," Ginny said, still grinning and bouncing lightly on the balls of her feet, "here she is, all for you, Ron!" She stepped aside, and I was wondering about the lack of a speech when Ren stepped out for us to see her.
She looked beyond her normal pretty. Her waist length hair had small braids scattered through it, and she wore one of Ginny's skirts and a light purple t-shirt. It was so simple, but I guess Ren always looked pretty. She looked at me and smiled slightly. I grinned back at her.
"Ready to go?" I asked, and she nodded, stepping towards me.
"Bye bye, Hermione and Ginny and Sirius," she said sweetly before staring at my extended arm. I helped her out by taking her arm in mine, and we headed for the door.
"Don't be out to late, now," Sirius said teasingly. "Have her back by eight."
I nodded. "Don't worry, Mr. Black," I said formally, "we'll be back by seven-thirty sharp."
Sirius laughed and shut the door behind us. "Have you apparated before?" I said stupidly, knowing I'd apparated her to St. Mungos all those days ago.
She smiled. "I were sleeping."
"Oh, right," I said awkwardly. "Well, hold on tightly, okay?"
She nodded, smiling at me, and I turned us on the spot. Ren got a little nervous when she stopped seeing and breathing, but I kept my grip on her arm firm so nothing bad would happen to either of us, and we landed in an alley behind the Dragon Scale with a small pop!
I took her inside and we sat down at a table along the window. I ordered for the both of us, hoping she'd liked what I picked, considering she was still on a kindergarten level in terms of reading.
"So, er..." I froze. Why had I not planned anything at all to say?
She smiled at me.
"Er...do you like music?" I mentally slapped myself in the face. Five times.
Her pretty smile widened and she nodded. "Mr. Sirius shows me music sometime. He like Cauldron."
I nodded, smiling at her smile. "Cauldron is cool. What's your favourite song?"
She thought for a few minutes. "Crying Magic," she said finally.
"That's a great one!" I said, glad she'd chosen that one. It was the only Cauldron song I knew. "What's your favourite band?"
I choked on my water. Not that it was a muggle, but because she'd chosen Alice Cooper. She didn't seem the type for his...theatrics. But I then realised she probably didn't even understand more than half of the lyrics, and just liked the sound of his songs.
"He's cool," I agreed. "Favourite song?"
"Might as well be on mars," she said. It was funny hearing her say the names of songs, because it was so strange to hear her English sounding so nice.
"Good one," I said. Okay, Ron. Let's get off the topic of music. This is going nowhere.
"So...do you like school?"
She nodded excitedly, setting down her milkshake. I knew she'd like it-she still favours cold over warm. "Yes, very much!"
It was fun to listen to her talk about school. She loved learning a lot more than anyone I knew, except for Hermione, maybe.
After another few minutes, our meals came, and she happily ate her soup. She loved using spoons. I was glad for food, because when Ren ate, she didn't talk much, and it gave me the chance to think of things to talk about.
"Would you like to go for a walk?" I asked her after paying for our meals.
She smiled and nodded vigorously. I stood up and we left together, headed for a park on the other side of town.
I covered a lot-how she liked living with Hermione and Sirius, how she liked the other Order members, her past-when she decided to start asking the questions. I hadn't given her enough credit for being perceptive, it seemed.
"You love Hermione?"
I couldn't tell if she meant it as "Do you still love Hermione?" or just in general.
I didn't answer for a few minutes as I tried to decide on what she meant, eventually just going with in general. "Yeah, I love her," I replied.
"You fancy me?"
I smiled at her. She was looking down at her feet, that look on her face when her forehead crinkled and her lower lip stuck out, when she was thinking very hard. I stopped our walk when we'd reached the gate leading to the empty playground, and I turned her face to look at me. "I do fancy you."
"But you love Hermione?"
"I do love Hermione, more than anything," I admitted. "But it's okay. She's with Sirius, and I fancy you. I want to be with you."
She thought about this for a few moments before a smile grew across her lips and she took my hand in hers, and we went to the playground.
She was estatic when she found the playground had a swingset, which she'd only been on once, but she really wanted to practise pumping instead of being pushed, because she wanted to go as high as the others had been able to go. I got on the swing next to her to demonstrate, and she was immediately able to copy me, and was soon going higher than I was. My legs were starting to burn at using muscles I hadn't used in this way since I was five, and I soon got off, content to just watch her laugh and swing on the swings. She eventually got bored and ran off to try monkey bars. She made me hold her waist as she went across, and when she'd gotten to the last one, she dropped into my arms, giggling like made.
When I didn't let her go at first, she seemed very confused, before something changed in her eyes and she smiled at me. Then, she moved forwards and pecked me on the cheek.
I smiled down at her, a little shocked. "What was that for?"
She smiled. "Hermione say is what people do when they like each other, after date."
I grinned at her. "Of course."
I wanted to kiss her so badly just then that I almost dropped her. But I didn't want to scare her, and I knew that I wasn't going to kiss her now. She was too unfamiliar with this, and I didn't want to make her uncomfortable.
I took her home after that, making it home just a minute before seven-thirty, and she gave me another kiss on the cheek. I said goodnight to Hermione and Sirius and apparated back to Grimmauld Place. Several Order members grinned at my goofy expression, but I ignored them, racing up to my bedroom and locking myself in. I collapsed on the bed happily.
I still loved Hermione, it was true. But I also fancied Ren, and I needed her now. I couldn't be sure, but I thought that maybe I did love Ren. All I knew is that Ren could save me. She could stop these feelings of lonliness, desperation. She could save me from being so upset all of the time, not having Hermione. I needed Ren. Ren didn't need me, but I needed her. Without her, I was like a homeless person, in desperate need for something, but with no way to obtain it. A dog without a bone, a begger. That's what I was without Ren.
And she could save me.