w h a t ' s
i n
a
s m i l e ?

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{ g o s a n g o k u }

x.

A little gift for LittleBlueSparrow.

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The clock struck midnight.

As quiet as Wally had learnt to be, Dick still heard his footsteps reverberating through the household. Ocean blue eyes fluttering open, Dick waited for his lover to arrive, already leaning over to the bedside table to grab the first aid kit that rested there. Before his fingertips could touch the box, Wally was hovering over him, emerald eyes sparkling in both pain and need. He caught Dick's pale hand and lifted it to his lips, kissing the scarred flesh and lingering for a moment before looking back down at him.

"I have to patch you up, Wally," Dick murmured gently, raising his arm slowly to stroke Wally's cut cheek. He wiped away the blood and then licked it off of his finger, sending a small smile up at his best friend. Green eyes followed his every movement as if he was moving with excruciating slowness, and he felt a surge of guilt and compassion as he often did when he realised how slowly the world turned for Wally and the other speedsters. Or went.

(—And that was the very reason Wally grimaced inside every time he was referred to as The Flash. To him, Uncle Barry would always be Flash – he never quite felt like he lived up to him or did him proud. No matter how much Dick reassured him, he knew it wouldn't help; it was Wally himself who refused to believe it. Even Barry's assurances fell on deaf ears.)

Sitting up and pushing Wally down onto the soft mattress, he carefully peeled away the mask and smiled at the sight of his lover's face. Their missions lasted longer nowadays. He hadn't seen his boyfriend in six months. With gentleness but no hesitance, Dick set about removing Wally's suit, the safe material leaving him only to be replaced by soft kisses that made him feel more secure than the suit did.

Lifting a hand, Wally threaded his fingertips through Dick's dark hair and tugged him down. "I've missed you," he breathed, and then kissed him. It wasn't shocking and it didn't bring about any cliché thoughts of knees buckling or stars erupting in his vision, but Dick felt that these kisses always left him with a sensation that only Wally could provide him with. It kept them going. Their kisses were like fuel, a life-source, something they could always count on to make them feel better. To feel loved.

Dick pulled away with great reluctance and disinfected Wally's wounds, face deceptively blank when his boyfriend hissed, even though he felt his heart ache whenever he saw him in this condition. He was always terrified of losing Wally - he could never stop thinking about it. Winding the last of the bandages around Wally's arm, he was dragged back into a kiss full of want and need and pure love that he had missed so desperately.

Wally moved, but Dick stopped him, grateful for his best friend's compassion to go as slowly as possible when they made love because otherwise he wouldn't have been able to. He cupped his cheek and cackled quietly, the familiar sound so reminiscent, and Wally grinned at it. "Let me," Dick murmured quietly, "since you're injured. But don't go thinking this is gonna be a regular thing, Wally."

The sheets pooled around his waist as he sat up again, coating his fingers in gel and then exhaling calmly as he pushed two fingers inside of himself, stifling a deep groan. He hadn't done this in so long, not without Wally, so it felt so odd as it always did after their long missions, but he could cope with it, if only to see the look of intense love and want on Wally's face.

"Nightwing," Wally whispered, and Dick shuddered at how it was said. Nobody said it like that - it was usually spat in disgust by the people he fought, or used as a curt form of address when working with another ally. It was never breathed so seductively, and he found it difficult to suppress a moan.

"Don't hold yourself back," Wally insisted, hands gliding up Dick's toned legs before running up and down his sides, feeling him after he hadn't held him in so long.

"Say my name," Dick gasped, biting his lip. "My… real… n-name."

Green eyes met blue, and Wally squeezed his lover, clearly but huskily murmuring, "Richard," and his eyes became half-lidded when Dick shuddered violently, balancing himself on Wally's chest and then grinning mischievously.

"Hope you're ready," he murmured, leaning down to nip at his lips, "Wally…"

He lowered himself onto him, his whole body vibrating, but not in the way Wally's did when he was The Flash, moving through walls as he had finally learnt to do, no – he was shuddering from pleasure, from pain, from pent up emotions he'd held back since Wally's departure.

It wasn't perfect. No, not at all. It never was. It was nothing like romance novels or how people pictured it. They moved too fast and yet it felt too slow, they exchanged gentle kisses but their touches were rough as if they had to feel more – it was something of haggard beauty in which they made love, but it worked for them. It was raw; it exposed them, left them vulnerable.

"Wally…"

"Dick…"

But neither of them minded.

Dick grabbed Wally's hand and Wally threaded their fingers together, and both squeezed as they moaned and cried out when they came together, their worlds blotchy and blur but not in the dull way they usually were. Their sight came back into focus and they saw each other, faces flushed and veiled with sweat, eyes as friendly as when they were young, with love that had lasted throughout the years and wounds and scars.

"I love you," Wally blurted out earnestly, and Dick smiled.

He didn't smile like he used to very often. It was rare that he grinned mischievously and cackled with playfully malicious intent. He smirked frequently, usually when he knew something others didn't know, or when the bad guy was destined for failure. Most of the time, his face was blank. He didn't glare ominously like Batman, he didn't scowl angrily like Superboy – he was just impassive. But when he smiled at his friends, it seemed sad, as if so much had been lost and nothing could be replaced.

But whenever he saw Wally come home or heard him say I love you, he smiled with all his heart and left Wally breathless.

"I love you too, Wally," he replied quietly, hand over Wally's heart as he leaned down to kiss him again.

x.

Okay, so I sort of vowed to myself I'd hardly ever post any drabbles from Tumblr on here, but I felt compelled to with this one. I won't say why.

Anyway, I hope you liked it. Doubt you'd be feeling the aster after something so bittersweet, but hey, hopefully you don't feel turbed either…