Disclaimer: No, no, a thousand times no.

Summary: Taken from the Glee Fluff Meme:

We've seen what nicknames the ND members could use against each other in a fight or when they want to hurt.

Let's see the secret endearing nicknames they use to show their affection for each other. Every members should have at least one chosen by all the members of ND.

AN: Yeah, sorry I didn't get everyone. It got to the point where I just sort of wanted it done. To the OP: I hope you enjoy it and that it was kind of what you wanted! I tried to keep as true to the prompt as possible, but it might not be absolutely exact.

Noah Puckerman's nickname (the good one, not Manwhore or Slutty McSlutslut) isn't really a nickname.

He's called a lot of things. Santana's prone to calling him hot stuff when she's in one of those moods and Lauren occasionally jokes around and calls him babe, usually accompanied with a scrub of the hand along his mohawk. Finn tends to call him bro or dude or just Puck, and he knows that when he hears Hey, man! that he's going to turn around and it'll be Artie.

He's the only one who refers to him as Puckzilla, which is kind of depressing but it's an awesome nickname.

When it's serious, though, when Puck can't take anymore and is a single step away from doing something he can't undo, it's always Noah.

When Rachel might step forward and enfold him in a hug that he won't admit that he wants, it's Noah.

When Kurt notices that he's down and thinking about Beth, he'll come over and squeeze his shoulder, that Noah falling off of his lips as easily as if he said it every day.

When Quinn looks over at him and her eyes soften in that way that he so rarely sees, he knows that it's going to be Noah.

Kurt shamelessly calls her darling and Santana calls her baby and Brittany likes those a lot because some of the things that other people call her aren't very nice at all.

Brittany doesn't always understand a lot of things that go on, but she understands enough to know that people are supposed to be nice to other people. Even if you don't like someone, you shouldn't try and hurt them just because you can. You especially shouldn't hurt the people you love.

That's why it hurts most when Santana gets that sharp tone with her, or when she sees Quinn rip Puck down by about three stories, or when Artie said those mean things to Tina. Brittany doesn't have to like people to not want to hurt them.

A boy called her slut once when they kissed and Santana flew off the handle entirely when she heard, and then got mad when she found out that Brittany didn't do anything about it, and then instead of baby called her Brit instead.

Brit's what she likes being called most of all because that usually means that a hug's on the way. It means that she's made Kurt smile even though his eyes are wet and red-rimmed and that Santana's got that warm gooey feeling that she likes to pretend doesn't exist. Brit's what Quinn calls her when she's feeling particularly maternal.

Brit's what Artie calls her right before he pulls her onto his lap and rolls her down the hallway, as if the greatest reward he could ever get is to hear her laugh as he does it.

Finn doesn't like most of his nicknames because most of them aren't particularly flattering.

Finnessa, Pastry Bag, and Frankenteen have all made their debut at some point or another but hearing them always just makes him cringe.

There are the fun ones too, like Mercedes' white boy and when Kurt rolls his eyes and calls him Cowboy or when he runs into Becky in the hall and she calls him Finny Bear (seriously, he'd only be able to handle that from her and he thinks it's sweet because she's sweet) and when he's chilling with Artie and the other boy calls him Gigantor because that cartoon was awesome so he doesn't mind the height joke. Who wouldn't take being compared to a giant robot who just happened to be a total boss as a compliment?

Most of all though, he likes being called Finny, as silly as it can sound coming out of anyone's mouth.

Rachel penned it first and it caught on eventually to spread through the whole glee club as all of them eventually do, being kept in reserve for when someone thinks he can use a pick-me-up because everyone knows that it never fails to make him smile.

Mercedes is good at coming up with nicknames for people, but she's also good at accumulating them.

She's been called a lot of things in her life just by living in this town, a lot of them kind of awful that usually revolve around the color of her skin or her weight, but the thing about having close friends is that eventually, those precious people can stop calling you by your name and you don't even notice.

Despite how she might complain about it, she always takes being called Aretha by Puck as a compliment (seriously, idol anyone?) and she rarely fails to answer to it. She takes Santana's nearly perpetual Wheezy with a grain of salt because that's just how that girl rolls and at this point she says it out of habit instead of malice. She wears Kurt's babygirl like a badge of honor because even though he's about as good at using endearments as she is, she is the only person he bestows that title on and she'd like to think she's earned it.

Tina usually just sticks with Mercedes unless there's drama doing down (and when isn't there?) and then she pulls out Miss Jones, usually coupled with a joking curtsy.

When everything comes crashing down and all the dirt at the surface gets scratched away, it's always going to be Mercy.

Mercedes thinks that it's ironic that she, the girl who smashed out Kurt's window, who threw the mother of all diva fits, who filled a car with tots, gets a nickname that means kindness and forgiveness because when it comes to those things, she doesn't think she deserves either.

But when she's curled up with Quinn on her bed after taking her in, it's Mercy.

When Kurt reaches out to grip her hand to lace shaking fingers in hers, it's Mercy.

When Sam leans forward to nuzzle into the crook of her neck, she can feel the name in his breath against her skin.

Mercedes isn't always merciful, but Mercy embodies the best of her.

Kurt always swore that he'd never be the one to give or accept nicknames. He liked his name, thank you very much, and he wanted other people to like theirs too. This dream was shattered the day he met Santana Lopez on the playground in second grade, and she looked him straight in the eyes and called him pretty boy. He straightened his spine and raised his chin, calling her gorgeous right back.

By junior year of high school, he'd gathered more than he ever thought he could want, some he treasured more than others.

He abhors the ones that come with shoves and violence and the feeling of cold, rough metal on his back. The ones that sound like faggot and bitch and fairy leave him numb and violated, as if the words themselves dug claws into his skin and tugged with a vengeance.

Brittany's warm and bubbly Kurtsy makes something inside him shiver and purr and he feels like if he really tried, he could pull on Mercedes' affectionate dear heart like a blanket and curl up underneath it. He always protests to Puck's perpetual dude but somehow it still feels like a shield that might actually be able to protect him. Finn's bro is along the same lines, but only slightly less resented for its truth, even though it still makes him feel like a frat boy every time he hears it. He often feels like Santana has his nicknames on rotation because one day she'll be calling him Ladyface (not appreciated, Miss Lopez) and the next it'll be Pride Parade or Rainbow Bright, but that's just Santana and he knows she's just how she is.

But when Rachel Berry (Rachel-freaking-Berry) is curled up sobbing on his bed and huddled up against him like he's the only thing keeping her together, the broken word that comes out of her is definitely going to be Blue Eyes. He doesn't know when it happened because he doesn't remember voting on it, but that's how he knows that it's serious business.

When someone's bedroom is strewn with feathers from an intense pillow fight and he and his girls are sprawled around the room on top of each other, he'll feel Tina run her hand through his hair and call him Blue Eyes.

The day he announces his transfer to Dalton, most of his friends are too upset or panicked to really discuss it with him right away and he understands that. When Kurt's laying on his bed after his shower and his phone buzzes, Mike's text message reads simply, It's okay, Blue Eyes and that's enough for him.

Santana knows that she should probably be a little upset by being called Satan all the time, but really she can only appreciate it. The irony is amazing considering that her name means saint-like and she's anything but. She knows that the most important thing in life is to know thyself, and the second most important thing is to know thy company. The third is to never ignore thy libido, but isn't particularly applicable to this.

Santana knows the difference between Puckerman calling her Satan with a roll of his eyes and one of the hockey jocks saying it with a pointed finger and a sneer.

She knows that Quinn's voice forming the word hellbitch means nothing even close to what someone else means when they say the same thing.

Santana Lopez knows the difference between what words say and what words mean just as easily as she knows that grass is green and that the square root of four is rainbows, because Brittany knows more than anyone thinks she does.

She knows that Finn's probably going to call her Sana for the rest of eternity and she can't help but think that it has a ring to it even if he does have puffy dessert nipples.

Santana Lopez doesn't like to get serious unless it involves causing someone else agony, but the rest of her friends don't really share that viewpoint, so she can't really help but get involved when it does.

She knows that Sanny's probably what she's going to be hearing when Mercedes scrutinizes one of her outfits and approves. Not that Santana needs or wants Wheezy's approval, but it's nice to have.

She knows that Kurt's at the top of his game when he sees her and immediately barks out Sanny, eyes alight.

She knows that Brit's feeling safe and loved and loving whenever they're on a bed together or holed up in an alcove somewhere, and she's pressing kisses behind her ear and Santana can feel her eyelashes brushing and she feels Sanny whispered into her skin.

Rachel always wishes that her fathers had named her Barbra instead of Rachel but realizes that if she's going to be a star, she needs to have a name that's hers.

That's why she can't quite understand why everyone insists on calling her names that don't belong to her, until they do and she suddenly gets it.

She loves her name but nothing compares to the soft and squishy look on Finn's face when he leans over and drapes an arm around her shoulder like it belongs there (it does) and calls her Rach. She loves her name but it never sounds nice when Kurt says it because he calls her Rachel when he's annoyed (yeah, okay, he's annoyed at her a lot) and she much prefers it when he smiles and says ma chéri like he's always done it. She can't help but laugh whenever Mercedes huffs and calls her Miss Thang because good lord does it suit her.

Rachel's been called a lot of things over seventeen years of her shining, talented life. Busybody. Annoying. Drama queen. And yeah, even she can admit that sometimes she can be all of those things. Nobody's perfect even if Rachel tries her best to come close.

Not everyone can understand her genius, after all.

It's clear from the first that somehow or another, everyone in their group is somehow going to end up with a universal moniker that only they can use, at least to her. She is Rachel Berry and she knows these things. The thing is, she expects hers to come from Finn and it doesn't.

It's Brittany, of all people, who comes up to her after a particularly disastrous math class and pats her on the cheek, calling her stargirl. Rachel falls in love with it immediately, but doesn't expect it to catch.

Until it does, but only when someone's either feeling particularly loving or she's being pathetic enough to warrant it (thanks, Kurt.)

When Artie offers her a ride on his wheelchair to English, he smirks at her and calls her stargirl (as opposed to his usual greeting of Hey, spastic) and she can't help but smile.

Rachel likes to surprise people with hugs, and every time she does it to Tina, the girl blinks as if it's the first time and mutters Thanks, stargirl into her hair and it feels better than winning, which says a whole lot, because everyone knows how Rachel Berry feels about winning.

AN2: Hope everyone who read this enjoyed it! Please review if you liked it, or even if you want me to burn in eternal flame.