Title: Hands Off

Beta: asherxslasher

Word Count: ~600

Summary: Nathan is an evolved kind of man, immune to caveman posturing. Really. ...Mostly. People just need learn to keep their hands off his Jack! Established relationship. One shot.

Warning: Slash. Basically no plot here, this story is funny fluff.

AN: This story hijacked my brain while I was trying to finish something else entirely. It's my first Eureka fic, and my first Nathan/Jack, so if you think I didn't get them quite right, that's probably why. Constructive criticism is welcome, but comments such as 'I hate your face' or 'Your story is stupid. bye' will be promptly deleted. I have a smutty sequel tentatively planned, but it might take me a while as I finish other stories and try not to die from my RL workload. Feel free to remind me if it takes a while.

And without further ado, please enjoy the story!


Nathan likes to think that he is both sharp and sophisticated, a more evolved kind of man. He's above all the primitive posturing other men are subject to. He's confident (you might say smug) that he and Jack have a mature relationship, completely free from macho insecurity.

Mostly. Don't get Nathan wrong, Jack's great. Really great, in fact. Too great.

Jack's just so nice. Everybody likes him. Everybody. Jack walks into a room and everyone smiles at him, just automatically. Jack is friendly, and nice, and even though he never flirts, people respond to him like he does.

It's not Jack's fault that everyone in Eureka is a slut for him.

Ahem. And it's not Jack's fault that Nathan is a lot less evolved than he imagined.


When Vincent flirts with Jack while he's making his coffee, Nathan wants to glare Vincent down until he stops making eye contact with and simpering at Nathan'sboyfriend. Instead, Nathan takes a deep breath, and smiles charmingly at the man who up until a moment ago was sending coy looks at Jack.

When Alison laughs at Jack's jokes, and touches his arm, Nathan wants to yank him away. But no, Jack's great and Alison knows not to really flirt, so he just takes a deep breath. He reminds himself that he's above such primitive actions as snarling and growling, but still feels better when Alison moves away.

It's when Nathan's silently contemplating smacking Jack's ass to get Jo to stop standing so close to him, that Jack starts grinning at him. Nathan raises his eyebrows at him, and Jack laughs.

"You're making that face again," Jack says, still grinning. Nathan frowns.

"I wasn't making a face."

"Oh yes you were. You were making that, 'hands off, he's mine' face," Jack says. Nathan narrows his eyes at his boyfriend.

"I do not have a face for that," Nathan denies.

"Uh-huh. Right. Don't worry, you're usually pretty good at hiding it," Jack says.

I wouldn't have to hide it if people could keep their hands to themselves in the first place, Nathan thinks. Jack grins.

"You're making the face again."

"Is it so wrong to want people to respect my claim?" Nathan asks, frustrated.

"Your claim, huh? That's very sweet, but, uh, newsflash, you don't own me, I don't belong to... Nathan, what are you doing down there?" Jack says. Nathan looks up from his position on one knee and gives Jack a 'duh' look.

"I'm asking you to belong to me, Jack," Nathan says, grabbing one of Jack's hands.

"Oh."

"Yeah, oh. Look. I love you very much. I want you to be there for the rest of my life. And I want the right to kill anyone who touches you ever again," Nathan says in his most reasonable tones. Jack looks shocked, then swiftly smiles.

"You know, that's the sweetest thing you've ever said to me," Jack says.

"Yes or no, Jack. I'm ruining a good suit down here for you," Nathan says, rolling his eyes. Jack looks down at him, and Nathan swallows. Jack could say no. That would... that would be pretty crushing, actually.

"You haven't asked yet," Jack points out, the smartass.

"Will you please marry me, Jack Carter?" Nathan asks, forgoing sarcasm or any more delays. Jack blinks. Nathan's almost afraid he broke him, but then Jack grins and says,

"Yes, of course."


When Nathan slips a ring on Jack's finger, it's the most satisfying feeling he's ever experienced.

Nathan's really starting to like this whole 'primitive' thing.


Thank you for reading. I would love to hear from you.