Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer. I am not Stephenie Meyer.

Beta: Aleighy

A/N: I know this is short, but I am working on the next chapter that leads to Edward's Nerdcave, and I wanted to give you this interlude of sorts to give a better insight into the workings of Nerdward's mind. I hope you enjoy it, and if I don't post again before Christmas (though I hope to) Happy Holidays to all my readers out there.

P.S. Thank you for all the birthday wishes and sentiments of luck for my finals. I'm officially 4.0!

Back to your regularly scheduled reading...

About three things I am absolutely certain:

One, after months of reveries and nightly dreams, now that I've actually spoken to her, laughed with her, touched her, I am completely in love with Bella Swan, regardless of the fact I am too afraid to actually tell her.

The second is that there is a part of her, not sure how small, that is just as neurotic as I am. Unassuming hotel stay turned sex-dungeon escapade? No issues. Heart-shaped steak touching her mashed potatoes when we ordered room service? Two and a half minutes of incoherent grumbling and shaking of her head as she meticulously divided her plate "properly."

And third…

The woman is a succubus that is going to drive me into an early grave.

My heart still isn't beating normally. And my poor, poor penis.


I woke up with a groan, from a dream of Bella sucking me off to a reality in which Bella was sucking me off in an attempt to waken my penis for the umpteenth time since we'd arrived in the hotel room. Blearily, I glanced at the clock and saw it was past three in the morning, only two hours since our last round. I was prepared to swallow my embarrassment and explain to her that the poor guy just didn't work overtime, when she swallowed and my cock hit the back of her throat and valiantly rose to the task.

Either he was making up for lost time, or he just couldn't pass up an opportunity to enter the Promised Land I'd been fantasizing about for the last seven months.

My body exhausted but a certain part of mine very much awake, I lifted her off of me with a pop and hoisted her up to straddle me. She giggled lightly as she sank down, leaning over me and whispering against my lips.

"That tickled."

I smiled back into her mouth as we kissed, marveling at my comfort with her, before she began to rock over me, and I couldn't think of anything anymore. Nothing except the heat of her surrounding me, the softness and slipperiness of her skin, so much skin the sensation was overwhelming.

Her rocking sped as she started making the gasping keen I'd come to learn was her tell of an impending orgasm, and in response I thrust to match her movements, a warmth of pride filling my chest when I heard her moan and felt her clench. I held her close to me as she came, rolling us to our sides and continuing to move inside her, hitching her leg up around my waist. Her eyes widened and her nails dug into my shoulders as the shift drove me deeper inside.

"Edward," she whispered, pleading.

My eyes fought to roll into the back of my head as her hips grinded against mine in tandem, my hand wrapping around the back of her neck to bring her face to mine for a savage kiss. My orgasm came with no warning, and my entire body jerked in response. The unintentional extra deep thrust ripped another climax from Bella, my mouth swallowing her shocked cry.

My hands shaking slightly, I reached down and pulled the sheet up, disconnecting us. She curled into my arms and kissed my chest softly.

"Good night…again," she murmured, her lips curling into a smile against my skin.

I chuckled breathlessly, holding her close as she drifted back off to sleep and I did the same.

Or tried to, at least. She'd warned me in her office that she grinded her teeth in her sleep, and it turned out she hadn't been kidding. She really did. Loudly. Thinking into the future, I wondered if perhaps a mouth guard for her or earplugs for me might be in order. Thoughts of a future at all made me grin like an idiot, though. And that wasn't what was keeping me awake anyway. That would be the searing pain in my groin.

She kicks in her sleep, too. This is only slightly helped by the fact she steals the comforter and cocoons herself so completely that the kick is somewhat dampened. But after literally hours of lovemaking, I wouldn't have been surprised if a strong breeze was able to cause me discomfort. I also really needed to urinate. And aside from the pain in my groin, my arm was pinned underneath her cocooned body, and every attempt to move it only caused her to burrow deeper on top of it. If I didn't think I was about to wet myself, I would have thought it was adorable.

Ever so slowly, inch by inch, I twisted and pulled my arm, when suddenly, without warning, she rolled completely away from me, freeing my arm at last. I was mid-pull, however, and the unexpected momentum sent me rolling off the side of the bed to an ungraceful heap on the floor. From above I heard only a light snore. Painfully pulling myself up, I walked gingerly into the bathroom en suite, my completely numb right arm hanging limply at my side.

Staggering over to the commode, I reached down to hold myself so as to piss properly and hissed as my hand grasped very, very raw skin. Looking down, it also appeared slightly red as well. One eye looked back up at me with a sad tear, as if to say, I love her too, but please…no more! Mercy!

"You're the one that decided to wake up for the last tumble," I ground out before I could stop myself.

Dear God, I was having an argument with my own penis. And as he finally released a seemingly endless stream, much to the consternation of my throbbing loin muscles, it appeared he was winning.

After I'd finished my ablutions, I started to head back to the bed, but paused. If while climbing back into bed I accidentally woke up Bella and she wanted another go-round…I looked down at the poor guy and his eye was narrowed to a slit, threatening mutiny.

Sitting down on the edge of the tub, I nodded down at him. "No, I know. It's not worth the risk."

Agreeing with my penis was better than arguing against him, right?

Sighing, I rested my head in my hands, noting they were shaking slightly. I felt like I was a bit on sensory overload. Not only had I experienced more physical touch in the last twenty-some odd hours than I had in the last five years, but it hadn't just been anyone's touch. It was Bella's. Bella, my dream girl, who shocked me by even knowing my name, let alone knowing anything about me, or wanting to know more, enough to knock her monitor over just to get my attention…Speaking of which, I would need to replace that come Monday. I wondered idly if she would perhaps be willing to let me build her an entirely new computer. God knows I had enough spare parts laying about my apartment…

Shifting a little, I grimaced as my groin protested the movement. There was a very real chance I'd strained something. I'd used muscles today that I'd forgotten I even had, if I ever even really knew. I couldn't get over the mere fact that I had even kissed her (or rather was technically kissed by her, since she made the first move), let alone made love to her. The sheer number of times we'd copulated and the various positions were beyond the realm of my mind's comprehension at the moment. In my wildest fantasies (of which there were several) I'd never imagined Bella to be such a wildcat in bed (or showers…or against wall-length mirrors…or balcony windows…). Unbelievably, I actually began to harden in remembrance, but I squashed that train of thought brutally, giving my overused phallus a short nod of apology for waking him from his slumber. His only response was a small twitch as he went right back to sleep.

Redirecting my thoughts into safer territory, I thought back on the less carnal parts of the day.

Playing Twenty Questions, that turned into thirty, and then forty…

Discussing the merits of pie as we shared a slice, and laughing as she surprise-attacked me with whipped cream, right on the face…

Tickling her into submission of the remote, before discovering the only channels available were of the pornographic variety…

Wondering what sort of adventurous Gideon might have braved the suite to deliver the Bible in the nightstand…

I chuckled softly. What a day.

I held a conversation, several conversations, actually, with another person that wasn't a family member, that didn't contain multiple awkward silences or my own stuttering. Or a panic attack. I'd talked and smiled and laughed more today than I probably had in my entire life. And again, not just with any person. Bella.

The fantastical version mixed with my own slightly obsessive observations of her didn't hold a candle to the real version I'd gotten to know today. Real Bella was quick and witty, funny and mischievous. She was beautiful, inside and out. She was slightly neurotic and self-conscious, both bold and shy. She was a blanket thief. She was affectionate and passionate and, I dared to hope, loving. Most of all, she was just real. Really mine.

If I'd thought I loved her before, there was no doubt about my feelings now. I loved her, more deeply than I ever thought myself capable of, and with that thought, I made my way out of the bathroom and joined her in bed with a smile.

Quietly. After I grabbed an extra blanket from the closet.

Thanks for reading.