OkaAYYayyy...excuses of my awful writing and such are at the end of the chapter.
Thanks for the reviews my loves!
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing of the Twilight world. I don't even know why I bother to put a disclaimer anymore. I'm obviously not Stephenie Meyer. XP
I can count on both hands how many times I've considered- genuinely considered, that is- going on a murderous rampage against the human race. Staring at the white scratch on the side of my beautiful red convertible, as clear and serrated as a wound on a soldier...
This was one of those moments.
And it was Emmett's fault. Indirectly, yes, but had he not driven away with my purse in the backseat of his Jeep this morning, I wouldn't have needed to come to this stupid outdoors store. Emmett's keys in hands, I wondered how the fuck this managed to happen while I was in the store bitching at Emmett. Running my fingers over the scratch, I could tell that the offensive paint belonged to a newer car.
"A newer car with an owner who's about to have their closest run with death..." I muttered to myself.
I stood up and began to inspect each car I passed, my eyes raking over the parking lot, determined to find the asshole who scratched my baby up like a piece of scrap metal from the junk yard. There were white trucks and vans everywhere, all showing signs of owner negligence and wear. I didn't even want to go into the fact that the asshole didn't leave a note with insurance contact information, but took comfort in the idea that I'd only been inside the store for 5 mins, and that whoever had hit my baby couldn't possibly have achieved whatever they-
Wait a fucking minute. The white Hummer parked next two spots down from mine. I quickly ran over to the front of the Hummer.
There. A red scratch, like nail polish on a counter was thin but obvious to my vampire eyes. I stared in disbelief, trying to comprehend why this dick would 1. Hit my car and then 2. Park near it like it never happened.
It did happen though, and I wasn't going to leave until I met the person who drove this Hummer, face to motherfucking face. I walked back to my baby, and leaned against her hood. I considered walking back into the store and hunting the rat down personally, then realized I didn't want a scene to draw Emmett out of his work. Granted, I'd finally be getting his attention... Sighing, I grabbed the hair tie out of my hair and began to slide it out. The store doors opened and three voices, two male and one female, met my ears.
"Do you think the person will notice-oh. Garrett. Shit. Shit." I met the stare of one of the guys who looked like your average 21st century bro-douche in college, and he nudged his friend that common sense pointed to as the owner of the white Hummer. All three looked surprised that the I'd stayed, probably assuming I'd leave or, by some stroke of luck, not even notice the scratch.
"You." I hissed, rolling my wrists as I pushed myself up from my car. The man turned to stare and I sensed his heartbeat picked up immediately. Dressed in khaki and a black polo shirt, his green eyes met mine and showed a flicker of fear before taking in who was addressing him. The change was instantaneous as his nervous demeanor became that of an honest asshole.
"You. You hit my car." I repeated, standing in front of him. I refrained from cracking his skull open as he raked his eyes over my body like a piece of meat. I realized deep in the crevices of my mind that this guy reminded me an awful lot of Royce, my fiancee from long ago. He held himself with an air of importance, with classic good looks and the ability to morph his personality to suit his company. Of course, this comparison didn't exactly warm me.
"Sweetie, there are white cars everywhere. What makes you think that mines the one that hit your Daddy's car, huh?" He grinned, glancing over at his two other friends. I noted the girl next to him as she stepped closer to him, feeling a confrontation coming on- ex-cheerleader type, used to being the alpha-bitch. Her blonde hair was in a pony tail, smoothed back and pinned. I sensed her insecurity and bad-bitch facade as easily as a human could smell freshly baked bread; I had been her, years ago.
I took an unnecessary deep breath of air. "We're going to pretend like you aren't a fucking idiot for a second. You hit my car. We both know it. Apologize..." I said, unlocking my jaw and giving him a frosty smile, "And I won't kick your ass right here in this parking lot."
His attempted cocky smile was marred slightly by the flush of his ears, being addressed so directly. Glancing again at his girlfriend and friend, the latter who had taken out his phone and was recording the scene with shaking shoulders and a bit lip of delight.
"Listen bitch. He didn't hit your car. And don't threaten my fucking boy-"
My attention snapped to hers. "Look here you hopeless wreck. I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to him. You wanna tangle, we can tangle, but call me a bitch again and I will end you before you know what's coming." I spat the last words in her face, trying to remember those words that Emmett had always told me to say when I was feeling a tad violent. Hakuna Matata? Honestly, I didn't put much stock into what Emmett said lately, and suddenly felt the urge to do the exact opposite of what he told me to do. The girl's mouth gaped for a second, and then snapped shut and her eyes blazed. I turned my attentions back to her boyfriend.
"Apologize." I demanded, crossing my arms. For a split second, the boy looked like he was going to. I could see the wheels turning in his head, the internal battle of being a decent human, and saving face. Realizing that in doing so, he'd basically be submitting to a woman in front of his girlfriend and friend, he stood taller and stepped forward to me.
"I'm not apologizin' to some crazy bitch, no matter how hot she is. I ain't gettin' on my knees for anyone, and sweetheart, I doubt very strongly that you could take me down. I'm sure Daddy'll be willin' to pay-"
"Mention my 'daddy' one more time, and you're gonna meet Mama in a second," I warned. His face flushed and then he leered, "Well tell Mama she can come out to play any time she wants."
His girlfriend let out a soft exhale of anger and smacked his arm, apparently deciding to express her relationship flaws on me. She brought her face up to mine and placed her hand on her hip. "He ain't apologizin' for nothing. You parked stupid, it happened, get the fuck over it. It's barely a scratch."
I turned to the third guy to see if he had anything to add at this point, but he had apparently gone back inside the store, his phone placed on the Hummer's door handle still taking the video. I could hear him talking to the employees about the problem outside, and I inwardly groaned. I leaned forward into her personal face- I was wasting time, and had other shit to do.
"I'm going to give you one last time, honey."
She stared defiantly back before muttering "Bite me." and attempting to push me back. The next few seconds were a blur as I backhanded her face and kicked her knees from out underneath her, her ass landing loudly on the pavement as she lay there stunned. Her boyfriend blinked before grabbing my arm, and I stomped on his foot before shoving my knee in his face and slamming him into his car.
"How's it feel to be smeared against a car, sweetheart. That's your thing, isn't it? Leaving marks on cars? I didn't see nearly as much red on your car as I saw white on mine. We should fix that, shouldn't we?" I said, watching as his nose bled and smeared a streak of red on the side of his Hummer. He struggled for a second before I dropped him to the ground, knowing my eyes were black with the scent of fresh blood in the air.
I stood over them and they both shrank back, the girl whimpering slightly and her boyfriend with hate and admiration reflecting in his eyes.
"Your apology isn't accepted." I wiped my hands on my pants before blowing them a kiss and heading to Emmett's car and retrieving my purse, leaving his keys on his front seat. I was feeling petty, and knew he kept a spare key in his bag anyways. They were still on the ground when I drove by, and I sped out of the parking lot as soon as I felt Emmett make his way towards the front of the store.
I was going to get so much shit because of this later on.
"So lemme get this straight," Esme warily said from her usual counter spot, staring at Rosalie. "You publicly beat up a man and his girlfriend for scratching your car, knowing full well that you had more than enough means to fix it yourself..."
Rosalie shrugged and crossed her legs, sitting across and braiding Nessie's hair. Nessie sat entranced at the stories being thrown around her head, more than amused at today's happenings.
"You stopped a man from shoplifting, got Rosalie to destroy his car so you could establish a friendship with him, and then invited him over, apparently," Esme continued, eyes taking in my remorseless state. I nodded in affirmation, leaning against Bella who was looking at her job's bookstore on her laptop.
"I didn't destroy it. His car was a piece of shit to begin with, I just-" Rosalie was cut off by Esme's holding her hand up, and stared at Bella. I giggled at Bella's determined look, knowing she was dreading the next accusation that would be directed to her.
"And you lied to a man, telling him that you weren't married just to go on a coffee date!"
Bella snapped her laptop closed and groaned, folding her arms and sinking her face into them. Nessie rubbed her mother's back sympathetically as Bella mumbled gibberish "If he weren't British...I'm American, I don't know how to handle... I never learned how to shield myself..."
"Esme, let's not pretend that you didn't completely seduce the hot coworker." Rosalie reminded Esme, giving her a knowing look. Esme's mouth opened with shock, strangled noises from the back of her throat as she quickly rounded off with "I DID NOT SEDUCE HIM. I'm a married woman and he came on to me!"
Bella, Rose, Nessie and I were silent for a moment, staring at Esme's conflicted state. She exhaled in exasperation when the four of us burst into laughter.
"Esme, he asked you to help him with wallpaper samples. Let's be real here." Rosalie chuckled, smiling slightly as Nessie leaned back into her aunt. Rosalie never quite got over the maternal affection for Renesmee, but it was overlooked by everyone in the house, even by Jacob.
"I'm a interior designer, Rosalie Cullen. Is it so ludicrous my coworker ask me about wallpaper samples after work for an hour or so?" Esme said, placing her hand on her hip. We all gave her a pointed look as her words sank in.
Her eyes grew wide with shock and she dropped her arm. "Oh my god. I've seduced a man."
"Well technically that's already happened with the Great Doctor, but yes, yes you have Esme. You've released your inner Wonder Woman." I inputted, coming up behind her and wrapping my arms around her waist. Esme absentmindedly pat my head, staring at the clock on the wall we kept in the kitchen.
"Yes, but I've never... I'm not sure if I should keep leading him on like this, just to get my husband's attention." She muttered, and I genuinely felt a string of guilt for leading the closest woman I had to a mother into such an inner turmoil.
Rosalie clapped her hands once, leaning forward on the marble counter. "Well, that's just the problem. You shouldn't have to get another man's attention to make your husband realize that he needs to pay attention to you. None of us should. But it happens in every relationship, and let's not pretend that immortality isn't fucking boring."
The room was silent at the elephant Rosalie led into the room, the weight heavy on all of our shoulders. It was something that we vampires tried not to think about, the monotony of a life led several decades and then some. We'd been given lives that humans would dream about; wealth, power, and a lifetime that ended only when we were set on fire like the venom in our veins. We ran a wheel that never ended, we had no choice but to distract ourselves from the lack of death welcoming us at the end of a long life time.
"All right. We need a better plan, ladies." Esme steeled herself, and boldly said.
"Rosalie needs a pursuer. Once she finds one, we'll spend time with each pursuer as much as possible. Then, when the boys realize that their wives are sick of their shit and begin to whine and sweat a little, we'll have to bring it all together somehow..." I was frustrated. Usually I'd have a vision determining the outcome of situations like this, but since no one had made a set decision, I was mentally blind.
"The lakehouse!" Nessie exclaimed, standing up. It hit all of us at the same time, realizing what she meant.
"That's it," Esme said, clapping once in confirmation, as if she were magically going to make this plan work, "We'll do a get together at the lakehouse."
"So that's the official plan? Is there anything you can give us in lieu of a warning?" Bella turned to ask me, opening her laptop as Nessie wandered off and Esme began humming to herself.
"Nope. Nothing." I sighed, slightly frustrated. Although I chose take the lack of warning for the moment as a good thing.
Okay guys, so I've been slacking a bit. But I've bee busy this past year (it's summer now, so less responsibility somewhat). Not to mention my laptop has been broken, and it's been such a struggle. I'll be getting a new one this week, my friend was kind enough to let my borrow hers for this update.
I'm going to try to update once a week, although I'll probably update again one day soon. Thank you so much for your reviews, a sneak peek at the next chapter:
"Jasper, it wasn't what it looked like! He's-"
"ALICE, YOU WERE NAKED."
"Edward, why are you on my laptop? Is that... are you looking at what I think you are?!"
REVIEWS MAKE MAMA WANNA WRITE EVEN MORE, JUST SO YOU KNOW BABYDOLL
Also, anyone interested in being my beta, please PM me. I definitely need one if I'm going to be regularly working on this story. Thank you!