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Done for fanfic 100 prompt #95: Writer's Choice
A/N: Well howdy there! I've been watching some season one lately, and Nine is the man. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely adore Ten and Eleven is my Doctor, but Nine is just the man. Seriously, he could kick your arse just blinking at you, but then he just has these moments where you just want to hug him and let him cry. Oh Chris Eccleston, you're the best. :] Okay, rant over.
Anywho, this is the result of me knowing next to nothing about the original series (a fact that I am slowly remedying), and an ungodly amount of love for angsty!Nine. This is my take on the events leading up to the Doctor using the Moment. And yes, in my mind it was Nine who used the Moment, not Eight. Enjoy!
"I thought I would find you up here."
They stood on a rocky cliff overhanging fields of red grass swaying on the wind. The Doctor's arms were crossed tightly over his chest, his feet spread as if he was bracing himself for an oncoming storm. His icy blue gaze stayed fixed on the horizon as he nodded a simple yes.
She moved to stand beside him, adopting his rigid stance. "You've regenerated."
He nodded once again. Gone was the man with honey tresses and velvet suit coats. He had been replaced by a soldier, and a broken one at that. "Caught in the crossfire."
She nodded in understanding, her eyes shifting to peer at his new face. "It suits you."
He snorted, rolling his eyes. "Big ears an' a dopey grin. Fits me to a T."
She turned to him, quirking an eyebrow. "I'm just surprised you know what your own smile looks like. I bet one hasn't graced your new features yet."
"Why are you really here?"
She was suddenly very interested in the ground beneath her feet. Her eyes refused to meet his as she mumbled under her breath.
"I said, I heard you have a weapon. A weapon that could end, well, all of this." She looked uncertainly up at him, her head tilted in curiosity. "Do you?"
He didn't even look at her as he nodded.
"Well, that's good, isn't it?" She peered into his face, leaning forward in anticipation. "What are you waiting for?"
He remained silent, dropping his hands to his sides and balling them into fists.
"Can't… use it."
"Why the hell not?" She was frustrated now, her breath coming out in huffs. She didn't understand.
"Like you said, it would end all of this." He swept his arms out in front of him. "Look at it. Galifrey would be gone. All of it, in one moment, just, gone." His icy blue eyes turned to steel as he refolded his arms. "I can't do that."
She stood in silence, her eyes canning the horizon. The normally calm Galifreian skies were burning an angry orange, boiling with blood and battle. The red grass shifted in the smoky air, the silvery leaves barely clinging to the trees. It was the image of a planet at war. "You know what I see? I see an entire world holding on by a thread. Galifrey is dying, Doctor, and the only way to stop an infection is to kill the source. We don't even care if we lose anymore, just as long it ends. The only thing keeping us going is Time Lord pride." She paused for a moment, moving to look into his stony face. "I see a planet that is dragging itself along, praying for someone to end its pain. We need a Doctor."
His nostrils flared. "You don't know what you're asking me to do."
She turned to stand in front of him, eyes blazing. "To hell I don't!"
"No, you don't!" He was shouting, his calm façade broken in rage. "Do you even know what would happen? You'd be stuck, trapped in a time lock until the universe ends! Everything and everyone on Galifrey would die, and it would be all my fault! I would be the executioner of my own people, alone in the universe until the end of time!" He breathed heavily, his hands balled tightly into fists.
"I wouldn't ask you to do it if I didn't know you were the only one who could."
He pinched the bridge of his nose, willing her away. "I can't."
She narrowed her eyes in defiance. "Fine. Give me the weapon, and I'll do it. Then you can die down here with the rest of your people, knowing that you weren't strong enough to save the universe." She turned her back to him, gazing over the remains of her broken world. "Last time I heard, that's what you do, Doctor. You fix people. You rush in and save the day. Do that now."
Her words hung heavy in the air as the Doctor struggled to find something to say. She was young, only on her second or third regeneration, yet so wise beyond her years. Couldn't she see that it was the people like her she was trying to save?
"You would die, you know."
She turned to look at him with a fathomless expression. "I know."
"An' not just you, but your family an' friends as well."
She drew in a long breath and nodded. "I know that, too."
"I'm not a killer, me." He tried to smile at her, but he didn't have the strength. "But I suppose you're not really giving me another choice here."
"There are always choices, Doctor. You're just making a difficult one." She let out a huff of air, looking around them suddenly awkward. "You've better get going. The lines are caving all over the place."
He nodded, re-crossing his arms over his chest. "I'll be going soon; I just want to look at it a bit." His eyes swept once again over the sea of grass.
She offered him a weak smile, then started back down the side of the over crop leading to her transport. She turned back to him a few steps down. "Doctor?"
He looked over his shoulder. "Yeah?"
"You know what I said about choices?"
She bit her lip, and then looked at him with conviction. "Make the choice not to be alone. Make the choice not to let this destroy you. And Doctor," She paused, trying to find the words to tell the last member of her race. "Have a fantastic life. For all of us." With that, she turned and walked down the rocky slope, leaving the savior of the universe alone on a cliff top, looking over the world he had to destroy to save them all.
A/N: Oh Nine, you little angst-ridden fool you. You'll have Rose someday, so don't worry about it.
How was it? In case you were wondering, the woman he was talking to is one of the few Galifreian who gets him, thus one of his only Galifreian friends. They have quite a history, but I didn't want to write about their backstory in this. I thought it might mess with the vibe I was going for. Kind of a Rafiki whapping Simba on the forehead with a stick kind of thing. Anyways, does anyone think I should write their back story?
Nine would tell you not to be a stupid ape and push the button already. So push it please! :]