Title: You Oughta Know
Character(s): Regulus Black, Sirius Black
Warning(s): Grammar, very Stream of Consciousness
Challenge(s): Harry Potter Fanfiction Challenges – Extra- Difficult Songfic Challenge by Gamma Orionis
Word Count: 1,005
AN: This is a one-shot, based on the song "You Oughta Know" by Alanis Morissette
Regulus sat in his bedroom, cursed the door to not open, and pulled out blank parchment to sit in front of him. He needed to write this down, or he'd never understand. Regulus honestly doubted if Sirius would ever understand, but he needed too, he should.
So he started,
Dear Brother, he crossed that out.
Dear Sirius, dear, what was he thinking? This wasn't a bloody love letter, it was the truth.
I want you to know, I'm truly happy for you. He crossed that out. Too friendly
You made the choice to leave me, leave our family, crossed that out too.
Quickly, Regulus's hard wood floors were littered with crumbled paper. He couldn't write this. This wasn't something that was easily put down on paper; honestly if he even got it on paper it wouldn't sound believable.
Regulus crept down the stairs of Grimmauld Place, grabbed his broom and flew out the front door into the cold night.
When he reached Sirius's flat, he paused for a moment outside. He needed to come off strong and determined, like a Slytherin. Because he needed to be the real face of the Black Family, not the coward his brother had turned to.
He knocked, Sirius answered.
"What do you want Reg?" Sirius said the slur of alcohol drawn deep in his words.
"To talk" Regulus quickly entered seating himself at the center table.
"About what?" Sirius slurred
"I just think you need to understand that you left me to clean up your mess. You need to understand that I have to take the fall from your short comings. But I now get to bear the crest of the noble House of Blacks." Regulus waited as the message slowly seeped into Sirius's alcohol flooded brain.
"But, you've made the best out of your situation haven't you. Becoming Dumbledore's pet just like your friend, James. I'm really bloody proud to tell people my brother is a coward that ran away from home, ran away from his duty, and dumped this shit storm on me." Regulus was sure he was red in the face, but he kept going. Sirius hadn't even tried to interject.
"I'm really happy you had the strength to run away though, and I hope you survive though this war better than other blood traitors. I wish you all the best, because with this war; only one of us is going to survive." He didn't mean to speak as eloquently as he had, he just wanted Sirius to know, and he now had to fight possibly for the wrong side.
"Regulus, No one expects you to fill my spot. Stop being just a prat." Sirius responded.
"Actually Sirius, they do. While you're pining over the wonderful Mudblood Evans, the dark lord will control me. I know the entire Order believes that you're following some sense of duty or righteousness; but I know the truth. The only reason you're following them is because of Evans. You've been in love with her since you went to Hogwarts, but you were too busy living in James's shadow to do anything about it." Regulus watched a color flooded his brother's face
"I'm not in love with Evans, and don't call her a Mudblood." Sirius screamed
"Funny, then why is James's blacked out in their wedding photo?" He smirked, and the glass bottle on the table was thrown straight at his head.
"Get out" Sirius growled
"Fine" Regulus stood, "But just remember, you made a mess of our family, and I'm the one that has to repair it." Regulus smiled at his brother and pulled up his sleeve, the dark mark standing out black against his pale skin.
Sirius's face fell, Regulus left. Apparated out of the apartment back to Grimmauld Place, he paused for a moment noticing an unfamiliar figure in the kitchen. Alecto Carrow
"What do you want Carrow?" he said
"You" she turned to face him, her black dress cut too short, her eye make-up smudged.
Any other day he would have sent her home, but today he let lead him up to his room. He couldn't take the emotions trauma, Black's weren't supposed to even kind of deal with that. Emotional Trauma, who was he kidding. Sirius wasn't truthful with him; he shouldn't tell Sirius the truth.
But as Alecto threw herself over his bed, he couldn't help but start thinking again. Sirius threw his life away for a girl who'd never have his children, sure she'd be an excellent mother to James's kids. But Sirius had bet everything on a girl that would never reciprocate his feelings.
Sirius picked a random girl, over his brother. Even after all their promises. As children Sirius promised to never leave him, but instead Sirius left him for Lily. Regulus ignored Alecto as she danced around the room. He didn't even raise his head from his hands.
But Sirius had made his choice, he'd fight for the losing side because of a girl, he'd fight for a bird before he'd fight for his brother. Sirius left after his sixth year, and that night Bellatrix had come to Regulus and tortured him for it. Because he now had to pay for the sins of his brother, he was forced into the mess Hurricane Sirius left in his wake.
That night with Alecto on top of him, he raked his nails down her back, starting to draw blood. As it trickled down, he knew he just wanted Sirius to feel the pain he was forced to bare. He wanted Sirius to feel the pain he caused others. But he wouldn't because he was too in love with the Mudblood.
But as Sirius would spend the next few years protecting Lily Evans, Regulus started fighting for the cause his brother should have been working on. He was going to destroy the Dark Lord, because only he could. Because Sirius had abandoned him, so he'd fight for the both of them. Hopefully someday Sirius would know that Regulus had fought for him.
AN: This was by far the hardest one to write and keep in character because the song didn't really line up gender wise. Oh well, Let me know what you think :) Thanks.